I believe we attract, intended or not, at the level we have personally evolved to. This means simply we will find ourselves in relationship with people who are in our psychological comfort zone. For most of us, it means we surround ourselves with people that give us permission to stay where we are.
Achievement of any kind is the natural result of proper thought. Using tools like self-control, resolution, affirmation, cleanliness and self-directed thought, you move forward. You develop a higher consciousness, and your thoughts, beliefs, desires, and goals - all become more virtuous, worthy and designed for your highest good.
Lack of achievement is the natural result of negative thinking. Animalistic thoughts, laziness, corruption and fragmented thinking will set you backwards. Your consciousness descends downward, towards self-pity, victim-hood, bitterness and lack.
So what drives the direction of your thoughts?
For most people, it is the other people they surround themselves with. And they collect people that feed the electrical charge to be in victim-hood and commiserate around other victims. This actually makes you quite popular!
There is nothing to make you more popular with the herd than to be struggling. And nothing that makes you more unpopular with the herd than to be succeeding.
And it’s not just simple jealousy…
You’ve heard me say often that for every person seeking greatness, there are dozens more charged with safeguarding mediocrity. So do you really know why most of the people around you are happier to see you sick, broke or unhappy?
First because if you start in a similar situation as they do and succeed at something, this takes away their excuses for not succeeding. You make them look bad.
Second, they are happy to hear your tragic story, because that gives them a natural opening to tell you theirs. "You think that's bad, let me tell you what happened to me..."
And here's another factor at play. They really do feel sorry for you - and by commiserating in your misfortune - it also lets them experience a little victim-hood of their own.
"Did I tell you about my friend Jimmy. The poor slob just got fired from his job, he came home to find his wife sleeping with the paperboy, and when he went to get the gun to kill them - he accidentally shot himself in the foot! Now he's limping through prison, doing five to ten for attempted manslaughter." Because they are Jimmy's friend, they can hold onto just a little part of the sympathy and empathy he receives.
So of course the very first step to breaking the bonds of victim-hood is doing some critical thinking about the people you have surrounded yourself with – and what kind of charges you are receiving from them. Please check in below on this, and we’ll continue the process in the next post.