I’d like to apologize to those who were offended by the last post. Although I’d like to, I won’t…
In the post, I equated being a professional victim to self-imposed slavery. It seems that a few of you were offended by use of the word slavery. Some of you felt that I was demeaning the experience of people who have been or are in “actual” slavery.
So I really do want to apologize, because my goal here isn’t to hurt or demean people. But I’m not apologizing, because that would just perpetuate what is really going on with those of you who were offended:
That’s just you choosing to be a victim still.
I meant every word of that post, figuratively and literally. And let me go even further. I believe that self-imposed slavery is worse than slavery that is imposed on you by someone else.
Because if you actually are a slave, you probably had no choice in the matter. But to exile yourself into servitude and limitation, what a horrific tragedy that is.
So don’t go there. And if you are there, fight your way out. Now.
Like I mentioned in a recent post, an important element of escaping victim-hood is recognizing what emotional payoff you are getting from it. (Sympathy, attention, etc.)
The other important element is facing the reality and deciding you no longer want to live in victim-hood. I get you have crushing student debt, lost a lot in a divorce, were born with a disability, had your life savings embezzled from you, or any one of a million other possible scenarios. But it’s still going to come down to that ultimate question I’m always asking you:
Do you want to be a victim, or a victor?
Because it has to be one or the other, and you have to (get to) choose which one.
You have to decide that although your story could and would certainly generate much sympathy and give you a reason to validate your lack of success – you want no part of that. You choose to rise above it and become successful anyway.
Sorry if that sounds simplistic, but that’s just the truth. Do with it what you will.