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Embracing Fear

Posted By: Randy GageJuly 5, 2010

Fear fascinates me.  It let’s me know when I need to expand my knowledge, dig deeper in a subject, or overcome a limiting belief.  I’ve found that the more you find out about something, the less you fear it.  

That doesn’t mean I don’t have fears; just that I have learned to conquer the ones that keep me back from living my potential.  For example, I have fear of heights.  Truth is, I get a little uneasy just going up in a glass elevator or being on a high balcony.

So I made myself do some things to negate that, like going out on the roof of the World Trade Center and riding in a hot air balloon.

The horsepower in my Vipers is enough to kill me ten times over.  So I took lessons from racecar drivers until I could race around a track at 140 mph with confidence.

The more you know about a situation and the potential outcome, the less fearful you will become.  If you have read my "101 Keys to Prosperity" book, then you'll remember number 64:

The best way to raise your self-confidence is proper planning.

And once you have done that planning, you push your boundaries.  Blow up the old comfort zone and create a new one.  Until it’s time to do it all over again.  Because that’s where the real breakthroughs live…

Now that doesn’t mean taking foolish risks.  Only educated ones.

So what fears are holding you back from success right now? And what more could you learn about these situations that would lessen the fear?  Please share your thoughts below and we’ll explore it deeper on some future posts.

P.S.  Remember if you’re not a subscriber to my “Randy’s Rants” e-zine, you should enroll right away.  Tomorrow at 12 noon eastern,  I will be sending out a very special offer for an opportunity to Mastermind with me and a select group of high achievers.   It will be a small group and the spaces will fill fast.   That special notice will go out first to my Rants subscribers.

So please make sure you’re on the list and watch your inbox Tuesday at noon EST. Then move fast if you are interested, because the slots will go fast.  To get your free subscription to the Rants, go to the home page: https://www.randygage.com/

You’ll see the sign up box in the right column.   IMPORTANT: Once you sign up, you’ll receive a confirmation email.  You must reply to the link in there to activation your subscription.  Hope you have a great weekend.  Then look for the message Tuesday because it’s going to be HOT!

-RG

8 comments on “Embracing Fear”

  1. The only way to raise self-confidence is to lessen other's resistence -- Arthur Tugman. Great article Randy, you inspired me to write this adage for my monthly column in TheNetworkMarketingMagazine.

  2. Randy,
    This is one of the biggest fears I have. I am more afraid of falling. I took my son to the World Trade Center 10 years ago and had no idea that you could walk on the roof. Of course a 12 year old found it instantly. I caught my self tip-toeing like I was going to fall off just from being there. The strangest thing was looking down at the Empire State Building. Being an ex-New Yorker we were always told that was the tallest building in the world.

    My fears are about what other people think. This keeps me from success. Mostly it comes from the brainwashing I received as a kid and what I have continued to do to myself through the years.

    Thanks again for a great post>
    Jim

  3. What would be the difference between being fearful and the uneasyness that you feel in your gutts about something?
    How could you make the difference between the two?
    I know fear is being afraid, but the uneasyness that you feel about something that make you back off from doing something as small as not going for a walk (which is something that I do all the time). That uneasyness that would make you back off from danger?
    Just the word fear is something that I would wipe out of my dictionary.
    Then there is fear and being terrified... I am terrified of spiders. Just writing the word brings shivers down my spine.
    What fear are holding me back from success? I would have to say ... fear of the unknown. What's next... and I would also have to had that I am afraid that the (good) changes that will happen in my life will not be shared with the people around me now, so I will have to change my crowd (which will not be a bad thing but a different thing - the unknown).

  4. I have been de-cluttering the last several days... and I found a book that I had started to read but never finished.

    It is "Does This Clutter Make My BUTT LOOK FAT?" by Peter Walsh.

    Peter Walsh learned from the show "Clean Sweep"..."It became obvious that the clutter represented something much deeper going on in many of the people's lives and relationships...a shift had taken place-- almost without realizing it. They no longer owned their stuff; their stuff owned them. For some, it went even further. Their "stuff" was the way they defined themselves- "I am what I own." They were unable or unwilling to separate themselves from what they owned to the point that their living spaces became partially- or in some cases totally- unusable. To break this pattern is an intense challenge. It's not just about putting things in garbage bags and finding the right photo boxes. I help people confront and redefine their relationships with what they own."

    This repeating question keeps coming up: Are you living the life you want?

    Peter says this is where many of his clients have lost their way..."Creating a vision for the life you want forces you to make decisions based on the real priorities that should drive your life...Your home shouldn't overwhelm you...

    * It's not about the stuff: Clutter is about FEAR of losing memories, or worry about the future, or a sense that something bad is going to happen. It's a way of dealing with loss, or even a way of masking the pain of some past trauma...looking beyond the clutter for answers means addressing the underlying issues...if you focus on the stuff, you will never conquer the clutter and deal with the fat and the excess that fills your home.
    * Your Home Reflects your life: ...For most, changing their relationship to their stuff became the first step in a larger process of adjusting the other relationships in their lives."

    It sounds like it is rare to find a person without a clutter problem. Peter says: "In accumulating more and more stuff or eating more and more food, they are attempting to meet the need for "something more." No matter how much more they accumulate, howeve, the need remains...The hope is that material things will bring meaning and fulfillment. It never works."

    This made me think of lack... things we think we need to complete us. And the life lesson I learned is we are whole and complete. God created us... perfectly... and God loves us unconditionally...we don't always realize it though... thinking we are not good enough... it is never enough...

    "PERMISSION TO BE IMPERFECT"

    Peter says that the focus of his work is "to help people be honest with themselves- that's where change starts. Are you stuck in the notion that being ten pounds overweight is wrong and life destroying? Because it's not. not unless you make it so... Why are some of us perfectionists about weight when we're not perfectionists about anything else in our lives? What is most important to YOU? It should be personal happiness, love, family, relationships."

    "How do you feel? Are you happy and at peace with yourself? Do you have energy and enthusiasm? Are you open to new people and experiences? Do you radiate self-confidence and optimism?"

    "Imperfection is not a problem- unhappiness is. Happiness is the goal here, and a long life in which to enjoy that happiness...Look at your life. If you and your family don't mind the consequences of your weight or if you have a clean bill of health, maybe you should stop harping about those extra 10 pounds and enjoy life...I believe in living a life that makes you happy...However, if your butt looks fat and you don't like it, it's time to get rid of it."

    I've been working on figuring out my passions & pirpose in life and this goes along with what Peter says to ask yourself:"

    "What is the life I want to live?"

    "...having a fully formed image of your ideal life is key to making progress and worth the investment of some quiet time."

    Peter has a lot more in his book...in conclusion..."Stick with it: Old habits die hard...We are organisms. Our lives are organic. Let yours change, grow, and thrive. You'll feel young until you die."

    Peter Walsh's website: http://www.peterwalshdesign.com/

  5. You are absolutely right. Without confidence people can't feel full and self-sufficient member of society. It is difficult to start a business, it is difficult to defend their thoughts and beliefs, even before the close friends. Unsure people make decisions while under the influence of other people, circumstances, but not under the influence of his own thoughts. What a man needs confidence? In the future. In relations with other people. In financial support. Of course, healthy self-confidence of all this need confidence. But all named yet be reduced to self-confidence. Tell me, who is a man without self-confidence? But no! On what he is capable of significant? What can he defend? What can I do? Nothing can.
    For many people, there is the problem - lack of confidence in himself. Emotional forms it can take different - fear, anxiety, guilt ... Yes, all this makes us, as individuals, weaker, and this should quickly get rid of. On what is based uncertainty? Uncertainty related to: 1) With knowledge obtained previously by experiment or more correctly speaking - not enough knowledges of anything (no good education, no information) and 2) the expected consequences of using this knowledge to shape our state of confidence. Expectations - the fruit of the mind (fantasy fiction). After all, you can then just do not expect in our lives, and become a completely diffident man.
    Randy, in fact, You raised a very serious issue that returns almost everyone in it's life. That point is directly related to the resolution of human problems in any sphere of life, and most importantly you are giving people practical advice how to overcome it, forcing them to act , makes them think, makes them study and learn everything that can overcome these fears in life, in fact you are raising protective power of people- the human immune system. Thank you!

    Предложить лучший вариант пе

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  • 8 comments on “Embracing Fear”

    1. The only way to raise self-confidence is to lessen other's resistence -- Arthur Tugman. Great article Randy, you inspired me to write this adage for my monthly column in TheNetworkMarketingMagazine.

    2. Randy,
      This is one of the biggest fears I have. I am more afraid of falling. I took my son to the World Trade Center 10 years ago and had no idea that you could walk on the roof. Of course a 12 year old found it instantly. I caught my self tip-toeing like I was going to fall off just from being there. The strangest thing was looking down at the Empire State Building. Being an ex-New Yorker we were always told that was the tallest building in the world.

      My fears are about what other people think. This keeps me from success. Mostly it comes from the brainwashing I received as a kid and what I have continued to do to myself through the years.

      Thanks again for a great post>
      Jim

    3. What would be the difference between being fearful and the uneasyness that you feel in your gutts about something?
      How could you make the difference between the two?
      I know fear is being afraid, but the uneasyness that you feel about something that make you back off from doing something as small as not going for a walk (which is something that I do all the time). That uneasyness that would make you back off from danger?
      Just the word fear is something that I would wipe out of my dictionary.
      Then there is fear and being terrified... I am terrified of spiders. Just writing the word brings shivers down my spine.
      What fear are holding me back from success? I would have to say ... fear of the unknown. What's next... and I would also have to had that I am afraid that the (good) changes that will happen in my life will not be shared with the people around me now, so I will have to change my crowd (which will not be a bad thing but a different thing - the unknown).

    4. I have been de-cluttering the last several days... and I found a book that I had started to read but never finished.

      It is "Does This Clutter Make My BUTT LOOK FAT?" by Peter Walsh.

      Peter Walsh learned from the show "Clean Sweep"..."It became obvious that the clutter represented something much deeper going on in many of the people's lives and relationships...a shift had taken place-- almost without realizing it. They no longer owned their stuff; their stuff owned them. For some, it went even further. Their "stuff" was the way they defined themselves- "I am what I own." They were unable or unwilling to separate themselves from what they owned to the point that their living spaces became partially- or in some cases totally- unusable. To break this pattern is an intense challenge. It's not just about putting things in garbage bags and finding the right photo boxes. I help people confront and redefine their relationships with what they own."

      This repeating question keeps coming up: Are you living the life you want?

      Peter says this is where many of his clients have lost their way..."Creating a vision for the life you want forces you to make decisions based on the real priorities that should drive your life...Your home shouldn't overwhelm you...

      * It's not about the stuff: Clutter is about FEAR of losing memories, or worry about the future, or a sense that something bad is going to happen. It's a way of dealing with loss, or even a way of masking the pain of some past trauma...looking beyond the clutter for answers means addressing the underlying issues...if you focus on the stuff, you will never conquer the clutter and deal with the fat and the excess that fills your home.
      * Your Home Reflects your life: ...For most, changing their relationship to their stuff became the first step in a larger process of adjusting the other relationships in their lives."

      It sounds like it is rare to find a person without a clutter problem. Peter says: "In accumulating more and more stuff or eating more and more food, they are attempting to meet the need for "something more." No matter how much more they accumulate, howeve, the need remains...The hope is that material things will bring meaning and fulfillment. It never works."

      This made me think of lack... things we think we need to complete us. And the life lesson I learned is we are whole and complete. God created us... perfectly... and God loves us unconditionally...we don't always realize it though... thinking we are not good enough... it is never enough...

      "PERMISSION TO BE IMPERFECT"

      Peter says that the focus of his work is "to help people be honest with themselves- that's where change starts. Are you stuck in the notion that being ten pounds overweight is wrong and life destroying? Because it's not. not unless you make it so... Why are some of us perfectionists about weight when we're not perfectionists about anything else in our lives? What is most important to YOU? It should be personal happiness, love, family, relationships."

      "How do you feel? Are you happy and at peace with yourself? Do you have energy and enthusiasm? Are you open to new people and experiences? Do you radiate self-confidence and optimism?"

      "Imperfection is not a problem- unhappiness is. Happiness is the goal here, and a long life in which to enjoy that happiness...Look at your life. If you and your family don't mind the consequences of your weight or if you have a clean bill of health, maybe you should stop harping about those extra 10 pounds and enjoy life...I believe in living a life that makes you happy...However, if your butt looks fat and you don't like it, it's time to get rid of it."

      I've been working on figuring out my passions & pirpose in life and this goes along with what Peter says to ask yourself:"

      "What is the life I want to live?"

      "...having a fully formed image of your ideal life is key to making progress and worth the investment of some quiet time."

      Peter has a lot more in his book...in conclusion..."Stick with it: Old habits die hard...We are organisms. Our lives are organic. Let yours change, grow, and thrive. You'll feel young until you die."

      Peter Walsh's website: http://www.peterwalshdesign.com/

    5. You are absolutely right. Without confidence people can't feel full and self-sufficient member of society. It is difficult to start a business, it is difficult to defend their thoughts and beliefs, even before the close friends. Unsure people make decisions while under the influence of other people, circumstances, but not under the influence of his own thoughts. What a man needs confidence? In the future. In relations with other people. In financial support. Of course, healthy self-confidence of all this need confidence. But all named yet be reduced to self-confidence. Tell me, who is a man without self-confidence? But no! On what he is capable of significant? What can he defend? What can I do? Nothing can.
      For many people, there is the problem - lack of confidence in himself. Emotional forms it can take different - fear, anxiety, guilt ... Yes, all this makes us, as individuals, weaker, and this should quickly get rid of. On what is based uncertainty? Uncertainty related to: 1) With knowledge obtained previously by experiment or more correctly speaking - not enough knowledges of anything (no good education, no information) and 2) the expected consequences of using this knowledge to shape our state of confidence. Expectations - the fruit of the mind (fantasy fiction). After all, you can then just do not expect in our lives, and become a completely diffident man.
      Randy, in fact, You raised a very serious issue that returns almost everyone in it's life. That point is directly related to the resolution of human problems in any sphere of life, and most importantly you are giving people practical advice how to overcome it, forcing them to act , makes them think, makes them study and learn everything that can overcome these fears in life, in fact you are raising protective power of people- the human immune system. Thank you!

      Предложить лучший вариант пе

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