Speaker Success Strategies

Finding Your Voice & Connecting with Passion
By Randy Gage
Jan 16, 2003, 08:00

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Dear Colleague,

I just saw another demo video for a famous “name” speaker. And I was less than impressed. The truth is, he isn’t a very good speaker. I’m quite sure the demo video loses him more bookings than it gets him.

In his case, he is getting bookings because he’s had strong book sales. And now he’s milking that for all the speeches he can get. So even though he’s very well known, and does a fair amount of speeches – he’s mediocre.

What makes him – or any other speaker mediocre?

Presenting the same crap as every other Rotary Club hack. Just doing it for a lot more money. As I watched the video, I couldn’t help but cringe...

He gets introduced, and immediately starts with, “So how is everybody today?!!!”

They of course exclaim, “Great!”

Then he starts with the, “Oh come on, I know you can do better than that. Let’s try that again. How’s everybody doing tonight?!!!”

Of course he goes through this several times. Probably the worst possible way to start a speech, and the sure sign of a rank amateur. The only worse way is starting with a joke. (Unless you are a humorist.)

Why?

Well it’s shameless pandering to the audience, very manipulative. And unless you are speaking to the readers of “Tractor Pull Weekly” or some other room-temperature-IQ crowd, the audience will be insulted.

You have about three minutes—180 seconds—to make your first impression on the audience. This kind of phony, backslapping, glad-handing immediately sets you up as insincere. Someone who is talking AT them, instead of WITH them. Big difference.

The same kind of thing happens when you start with a corny joke. Speakers who tell jokes are performing a dog-and-pony show in front of an audience. Don’t get me wrong...

Humor is a VERY important part of speaking. But the humor should arise naturally from the material you present, not be artificially injected with jokes. As soon as you start with, “A funny thing happened on the way over here...,” the meeting planner is going to be cringing, as will a good deal of the audience. You immediately identify yourself as a journeyman presenter, dishing out your one-size-fits-all download.

Same thing is you start with, “Thank you Karen for that kind introduction. It’s so great to be here in Springfield. So how many people are here today from out of town? Ok, about 50%. So how many live here? Ok, about 50% too.”

Yeesh! Can you think of a more boring way to start a talk? If you are doing any of these things, you are wasting your 180 seconds, acting like an idiot, and worst of all, putting a barrier between you and your audience.

Those first three minutes—when they want to love you, when they want to connect with you—you are holding them at arm’s length. This is the most important time in your speech; your chance to really connect with the people in the audience, and have then leaning forward on the edge of the chairs, waiting in anticipation of what you will say next.

It’s a chance to really bond, and start that electric connection that all world-class speakers are able to achieve. So how do you do that?

Well don’t do any of the things we just talked about. In fact, when you first get up there, do nothing. Shake hands with your introducer, smile and acknowledge the crowd. And wait. Wait till the applause stops. And wait some more.

About three seconds. Which will seem like three hours when you first try it. A funny thing will happen...

The audience will focus on you in rapt attention. They will lean forward. They will feel concern for you, wondering if you are nervous, stage struck, or have simply forgotten your material. They will start sending you as much positive energy as they can, mentally wishing that you are going to be ok.

NOW you can start.

So what’s the best way to begin? A compelling story, or a compelling statement. But here’s the catch...

A compelling story is not the Roger Bannister four-minute mile story, the starfish on the beach story, or the Covey Lighthouse story. Everybody does these stories, and every sophisticated audience and meeting planner has heard them so often they could puke.

More importantly, these are not YOUR stories. And the audience can only connect with you on a soul-to-soul level if you tell your stories. And there is no better place to start than your opening.

And try this on for size...

Make your opening story one in which you are not the (s)hero who saved the day—but one in which you are the villain! Think about it...

Most speakers get on the platform and talk about how great they are, and all the amazing things they have done. (Think about how many ex-athletes, former presidents, beauty queens, mountain climbers, etc. you see on the platform today.) Their message is, “I’m great, I did great things—you can too!”

To which most people say, “Yeah, right!”

Now imagine if you open up with a compelling story of when you failed at something. Did something wrong. Told a lie. Yelled at your kid wrongly, or all of the above. You show yourself as vulnerable. And the audience immediately connects with you on a soul-to-soul level.

Within three minutes they are thinking, “This person has been where I am (or have been). They are real and human.”

Now when you tell them how you climbed the mountain, won the beauty contest, or brought home the Gold—they really do have a sense that they could do it too. You have connection. And a real communication between you and them.

You are speaking in a voice that is uniquely your own, and accessing the passion that only you can bring to the topic. This is how the world-class communicators bond with their audiences. They have real conversations that matter, with the audience, not at them, and about things that are important to them. When you do this, you too will bond with your audiences in a way that nothing else can do.

This doesn’t just apply to your opening, BTW. It holds true for all of your stories. The famous author who is trying to speak doesn’t get this. What he thinks is his “signature story” is actually the well-worn story about the little sick boy and the Make-A-Wish foundation. (You know the one, where the firemen come in the window.)

I’m sure there are people who are touched by the story in every audience. And his demo video zooms in on a teary-eyed audience member. But what about the other 95% of the audience who has heard the same story from ten different other speakers before?

Tell YOUR stories. The ones that no one else in the world can tell. And that is when you will be touching people in a way that you are truly making a difference.

Now if you are really committed to making this kind of difference, and you are a full-time professional speaker, or want to become one—there is a very important event you should be at. It is my final Speakers Institute. It is the most intense (five days, 15 or 18 hours a day) training ever conducted for professional and aspiring speakers.

We focus on the entire range of what it takes to be a successful professional.

Starting with finding your voice; selecting a topic and stories that are uniquely you. Then we look at how to package that, whether it’s keynotes or seminars. Whether you should be marketing to corporations and associations, or conducting seminars open to the public. (Or both.)

We’ll work on your platform skills, and ways you can better connect with your audiences, impact them, and cause them to make meaningful, lasting change. Then things get really interesting...

Because we spend dozens of hours on marketing. How to get booked, and promote seminars. How to get bureaus to work with you, and how to survive when you start out, and they won’t even talk to you. How to spin off meaty consulting contracts, and develop lucrative coaching programs. The different ways to offer your knowledge, such as books, audiotapes, CDs, DVDs, video, Special Reports, and other mediums.

Then we’ll look at all the ways you can sell that stuff. Through back-of-room, dealer networks, direct mail, space ads, and of course the Internet. In fact we’ll spend a whole day just on e-commerce for speakers. How to get seminar registrations online, sell your speeches, service meeting planners and bureaus, developing e-zines, selling download products and much, much more.

As I said, the program is quite intense. It’s not for tourists, Toastmasters and Rotary Club retreads. It is only for serious professional speakers, and those that want to become one. I won’t talk about it more here. If you think you are right for this kind of training, click on the link below and get all the details.

I suggest you print out the PDF file and read it offline, as it is quite lengthy, and deserves your serious attention. The details are at www.speakersinstitute.com

We have a number of people already registered, so if you are thinking of coming, please hurry, so you don’t miss out.

Well I’m off to Fiji, to conduct a Mastermind Retreat with some of my top-level consulting clients. When I return, I’ll work on the next issue, where we will look at the best ways to find and develop the stories you have inside of you. Until then, stay well, and make a difference!

-RG

P.S. Just a reminder, the URL for the complete information for professional speakers is at www.SpeakersInstitute.com.

© MMXI Randy Gage. All Rights Reserved.

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