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Why Doing Good is Selfish

Posted By: Randy GageMarch 31, 2011

What a wild and groovy discussion going on the last post and the original post that started it all.  I promised that we’d pick up on the topic of how doing good was selfish…

Before that, however, we need to finish the talk on “the greater good.”  Those are very dangerous words.

Self-sacrifice is more than the root of low self-esteem, it is anti-free enterprise and consequently anti-humanity.  When the living energy of productive citizens is sucked from them by the parasitic herd, what incentive is there to remain productive?  All innovation and development stops and everyone loses.

You have the herd, organized religion, and the government all telling you to be selfless, and take care of others.  And if you buy into this crazy shit, you are doomed to a life of lack, misery, and frustration.  Of unrealized dreams, and settling for mediocrity.

Adopting self-sacrifice as a virtue enables others to take advantage of you and, practiced long enough, selfless behavior ultimately destroys you.  You have no purpose in life, other than placating others and seeking their approval.  Which you can only earn by giving up your own happiness.  This is sick, twisted and dysfunctional.

Now every time I discuss this someone trots out the argument of Mother Teresa, Gandhi, etc, as that somehow negated the logic.  It doesn’t.

If you see your main purpose in life as serving others, you have an extremely low opinion of yourself, don’t believe you are worthy, and will experience a tremendous amount of lack and limitation in your life.  Not to mention that you’re probably personally responsible for the founding of at least three Co-dependents Anonymous chapters!

Insanity is a lack of reason or good sense.  We could certainly define it as unsoundness of mind to render a person unfit to maintain a relationship, or look after his or her own needs for emotional well-being and survival.  People who spend their existence worrying solely about the needs of others and not themselves are not noble, benevolent, and spiritual.  They are just crazy.

“Go sell crazy somewhere else, we’re all stocked up here.”

And because they don’t look after their own needs first, they really can’t help others in a healthy way.  They can console them, participate in their drama, or enable their co-dependence, but they can’t offer them real, meaningful help.

Or to repeat an oft-quoted line from a character in The Fountainhead, “To say ‘I love you,’ one must first know how to say the word ‘I.’”

I believe your highest moral purpose must be your own happiness.  Because this is the only healthy, sane way to live.  And the only way that ensures the survival of the species, and the well being of the most people.  In fact, it is the only honorable way to conduct any relationship.

You must not sacrifice yourself to others because that is depravity. Depravity because it is a certain state of moral corruption and degradation.  It is sick, a sure symptom of mental illness.

Don’t get me wrong.  You will sometimes sacrifice and help others I hope.  I’m writing this blog from a dentist’s office, having brought a friend here who needed emergency surgery.  (Two root canals.  So if anyone ever deserved some compassion, it’s him!)  Certainly most of you would do the same thing for your own friends.  If you were able.  But if you are scheduled for your shift at Burger King, you probably couldn’t get the time off.

In fact, to quote Mother Teresa herself, “To be able to give, you must have."

When you have your own happiness as your highest moral purpose, you have a productive – and moral – reason to exist.  And here’s the important thing...

If everyone did this, the world would be a much better place! Instead of dysfunction, depravity, and codependence, we would have healthy, functional, value-for-value relationships.  No one would be asking others to sacrifice yourself for him or her, and you would behave the same way.  That is the way healthy relationships are done.

This leads us to the issue of self-esteem…

A sane person understand that if they sacrifice themselves for others, they will diminish and degrade themselves, and ultimately be of use to no one.  Now this leads us to the next question that arises for many.  Namely, what about love and relationships?

Love is an expression of your self-esteem.  And an expression of your deepest values.  You fall in love with someone who shares these values.  And if you truly do love someone, it means that they bring happiness to your life.  Or in other words, you love them for purely selfish and personal reasons! (Because if you weren’t in love for this reason, it wouldn’t make sense.  If you were in love for selfless reason, it would mean that you would get no joy or personal pleasure, and are there simply for self-sacrificial pity for that person.  That is not love.  It is dysfunctional craziness.)

That doesn’t mean that there are not millions of people who would accept that kind of sick, superficial love.  There are.  But those are the people living lives of quiet desperation. They merely want to suck the joy, life and energy from your body.  Then, when you are as lifeless as they are, they will be content to know that you share an equal misery.

In a healthy relationship, you choose the person you love, and you fall in love with them because they bring happiness to your life.  This is the highest compliment and honor you can ever pay another human being – that you love them for the selfish reason of the happiness and joy they bring you.

Let’s go back to the issue of serving others, and giving to charity.  There is this belief (Often fostered by governments and organized religion) that you have a moral obligation to help those less fortunate than you.  Nothing could be further than the truth.  This is the kind of belief that keeps people ignorant, sick and broke.

If you live your life by the principles we are discussing, you very well may help others and contribute to charity.   Hopefully you do.  Personally, the number one deduction on my tax return for the last fifteen years has been charity.  And I anticipate it will remain so for the rest of my life.  But there are three criteria for this:

1)  The person or organization is worthy of the support.

2)  I can afford to do it.

3)  It brings me happiness to do it.

That alone is what determines on whom and where I spend my charity dollars.  It certainly has nothing to do with who is the “neediest,” or what causes are politically correct.

I support a great deal of causes.  The Opera, symphony, my church, wildlife funds, disease prevention and cures, homeless shelters, runaway shelters, and scholarships.  Computers for aspiring entrepreneurs, stage clothes for upcoming singers, and martial arts training for foster kids.  Academic scholarships, sponsoring amateur sports teams and holiday presents for hundreds of kids who wouldn’t have got any.

But I did all this for purely selfish reasons. For the happiness it brings me.

And that is where this all leads to.  You know exactly what brings value to you, and furthers your purpose, which is a life of happiness.  It means accepting that you are supposed to be happy and working towards that end, without guilt. Refusing to give in to guilt rackets that are practiced on you.

Which is not to be confused with Hedonism.  Which is where we’ll pick up next…

-RG

120 comments on “Why Doing Good is Selfish”

  1. Could not have said it better myself :-), and offcause it is provoking to many. But you do not get an argument from me. I agree.
    Love your posts! Thank's.

    Lene

  2. I second Lene, RG, you about covered it all.

    My only add: find yourself before looking out for others, for the main problem in this world are people who are looking out for others yet giving them horrible advice because they didn't tend their own shop.

    Be happy. Do what makes you happy. Teach others how to do it for themselves, without getting attached to any outcome.

    Have a powerful day!

    RB

  3. I just wanted to say... Thank you Randy!. I am loving this discussion... But due to my recent enlightenment this past year on the whole Rothchild / Builderberg Group / Tri Lateral Commission... that the elitists of the world have created the perfect storm for humanity to seek out religion, to be more of a humanitarian, to really focus on everything around them but themselves (ex: saving the earth, which by the way is a ploy to unionize nations as was 911). I believe it is becoming harder for people to accept "being selfish" because they are allowing themselves to be programmed to give all they have for the greater good of the country, and to help thy neighbor. STOP watching the news!!! It's evil!! Schools are rearing sheep these days by taking out anything that has to do with self expression (if you take your child to school, drop them off, and repeatedly do that then you are giving your child to the government to be groomed and trained for the world as they see fit... Take part in your child's life, inspire them to be creative, teach them that being a stand alone individual is OK).. Stand in line, raise your hand to speak, ask permission to use the restroom, etc... History that is taught in school is far from the truth, because its not the whole story.. “Maintain humanity under 500,000,000 in perpetual balance with nature." <~~ I bet this isn't in any school books, this is what they have planned for everyone, so get out of line, put your hand down, speak if you have something to say, and by all means please go use the restroom if you need. If you watch the news and your proud that our country is the worlds savior, and you wish you had more of yourself to give then YOU will be first in line, probably with your hand up requesting permission to speak...

    I know this may be a bit far from where you were going with your posts, but I truly feel that its the root of selfless behavior. Not to mention organized religion.

    If you believe what your Government tells you, and you believe in story books of promise lands then you are the perfect little sheep.

  4. "When the living energy of productive citizens is sucked from them by the parasitic herd, what incentive is there to remain productive? All innovation and development stops and everyone loses."

    I know, I know, you've talked about it in detail in your book. But I don't think your example is vibrationally accurate. Nothing will happen in our lives that we are not vibrationally in alignment with. If you are not worrying about the parasitic herd, and resisting the parasitic herd, and rolling your eyes over the parasitic herd, the parasitic herd will peacefully leave you to lead the life of abundance that you want and deserve.

    1. I have no problems with the herd. I live in my world surrounded by people of the same consciousness. I only point this out as a reality for other to work through.

      -RG

  5. You must've been there awhile - this is quite the post - but it bodes well with the follow-up responses from yesterday.

    An area that I see the values of selfishness improving peoples lives (and my own) is ownership/responsibility of how they are progressing and how their decisions are affecting the outcome. Taking that responsibility (even though people don't feel that you should 'self-blame' how something turned out) allows you to ask yourself the empowering questions - How could I have handled that differently? What did I learn from that? Not destructive, but constructive growth. And, you feel the ownership and control of your life. This gives you the confidence to move forward.

    I'm looking forward to your thoughts on hedonism tomorrow.

    John

  6. "But I did all this for purely selfish reasons. For the happiness it brings me."

    I agree - you are selfish.
    If you donated time, money, etc purely because you get your sense of happiness from doing it (or because you get a tax deduction), how is that any different from the Pharisees that publicly gave their alms to the poor in order to fulfill their need for public praise (pride?). Wrongful intent is the root of selfishness.

    However, if were altruistic you would give of your sustenance regardless of tax benefits, or how it made you feel - simply because you had selfless concern for others.

    To me it seems your last several posts are encouraging people to adopt a What's In It For Me attitude; i.e. if I don't get something out of it, there's no sense in doing.

    I think you need to refine your definition of selfishness - it connotes a disregard for others. I don't think your intent of these past articles is to foster a disregard for others. Is it?

    1. As you can see above, many of those things I do have no tax deduction. I do those things because they bring me joy. I certainly wouldn't experience that joy if I had a disregard for others. I would just keep those resources and time for myself. I do those things because I have a high regard for others and genuinely like to help when it meets the criteria I described above.

      -RG

  7. Difficult post for me.....I'm right now between a rock and a hard place...because of years ago (about 20) and down, of trying to *help* a wayward (boy was he wayward) teen to do better and stay out of trouble....now have 4 grandchildren from him.....he's been to prison 3 x finally got him *out of our lives* for 5 years. DD because of even lower self esteem, brought him back INTO our lives...changed>>>>hahahahah.....and now he's causing us all **** can't get him out and we have 3 teens that want nothing to do with him,,and a 9 yr old trying to protect, and the courts * think* a bad dad is better than no dad.....little do they know....so all because I was trying to do something *good*...........NOW I understand and find your post very very good. I have *helped* the same dd with the gkids for years, love that, but do feel put on....she brought him back because all SHE wants is her own life....and yes I feel used by her and unappreciated...... all this drama to say,
    Right on Randy. I'm not for selfish, but I do see the need for putting my interest first. I have 0....but I'm learning. I am on the verge of losing a self made business because all I'm trying to do is protect my gkids...from senseless parents....realizing after reading this....hm she got it FROM me....
    So right you are, IF I had helped out of the right way, that would have been ok, but I helped out of my own need...to be wanted by someone, to make a difference in someone's life, and in doing so have nearly ruined our lives!!!!!!!!!
    This was a hard post, because I was always taught to help others....only I didn't secure myself first. I'm a late learner, but getting there. Thanks, Randy

    1. I enjoyed reading your post, anonymous. I have 3 children--youngest is 17 and oldest is 37--and each of them brought home a "troubled" friend. The results of my helping their friends were not as dramatic or life changing as you describe, but I certainly can empathize with the initial response to be there for them.

      I have strong boundaries, though, having come through problems of my own, so I established limits. This last time (with the youngest) I just said no. Most of the time, interventions that I could offer would have only put off the inevitable, which is that THEY needed to deal with their own problems, or deal with the consequences of their actions.

  8. Hi Randy!

    LOVE YOUR POST!!!!!!

    Self-sacrifice seems to be THE weapon of altruists. And the word LOVE, seems to mask their discontent and hatred....

    What possible pleasure can they derive from giving up something of a greater value for a lesser value, or no value at all...?

    Do they even understand that Altruism is not kindness and respect for the rights of others, but a sacrifice of individual rights for the rights of others....

    This PROSPERITY Blog CLEARLY explains the harmful effects of neediness and dependency... Yet, Altruists blindly demand that neediness and dependency must be embraced and nurtured...

    - Agree with me....-they scream in total desperation....
    - Agree with me that self-confidence, self-esteem, reason, intelligence, ability and merit must be destroyed.... WOW!

    - Love blindly, they proclaim...
    - Love is blind..., So...embrace self-inflicted pain, self-inflicted loss and mutual resentment...and call them benefits of an unhealthy relationship....

    - Live for the "Greater good..."...Don't ask: At whose expense?

    - Give us "Free Healthcare..."...Who cares at whose expense....

    Declare that Capitalism does not exist, while typing comments to these posts on machines created by Capitalists....

    Oh....almost forgot....let's also use altruistic tool of fear..."Pray you never really need anyone Big Guy"....

    WOW!!!

    Now...there is the TRUE FACE of an Altruist!...Love those who suffer and despise those who prosper...

    I Love my Selfish
    Me, myself and I,
    Victoria

          1. Elton John is with me babe. He wouldn't want any part of that mess. You do realize you would be hard pressed to find many artistic intellectual leftists types to agree with what you espouse.

    1. "Altruism is not kindness and respect for the rights of others, but a sacrifice of individual rights for the rights of others…."

      I am not sure you understand the definition of altruism.

      How is having "selfless concern for the welfare of others" sacrificing individual rights? Do I not have a right to have concern for others that has no personal or hidden motivation?

      I consider myself to be altruistic but I certainly DO NOT "blindly demand that neediness and dependency must be embraced and nurtured…". Quite the contrary.

      1. DC,

        Of course you have a right "to have concern for others that has no personal or hidden motivation..." - I had the same right in Soviet Union...

        But now, that I am living in Costitutional Republic, do you think that I have a right to experience feelings of happiness when and if I choose to give, therefore have personal or hidden motives?

        Also, as I was born and lived in HELL on Earth under the Altruistic Communist regime, do you really think that I do not understand ALTRUISM?

        Really?

        Please...challenge me!!!!

        Victoria

        1. Sorry you had to live in Hell Victoria, seriously, I realize we are not on the same page about certain things, but I know that was horrible.

          Truly though nothing those bastards did was Altruistic. Communists there misused the term.

          I feel for you truly, and I am glad you get to live here now. 🙂

          And really, sometimes I say things to be funny, I know it was not funny to you.

          Annie

        2. Thanks for this post Victoria. And you seem to know more about United States of America than most because you refered to a "constitutional republic" and not a "democracy" as most citizens do. I assume that you also know there is a differece in the two. Have a couple of former USSR citizens as friends who speak very similar message as you. Thank you again.

  9. I think it would be best if I practice silence on this one. Two ears and one mouth exercise. If this blog has not caught on fire or vaporized from the heated conversations, I'll return.

  10. I once sent a letter to the daily paper after Mother's Day that went like this...
    I think I'll stick a fork in my forehead the next time I read another one of those "oh we can't have it all" diatribes...
    I have a suggestion for the Sun for father's day, why not have a bunch of father's moaning oh we can't have it all, what insensitive clods their wives are and how unfair life is and see the thrilled response you get from your female readers...
    I mean what do you expect you are getting when you decide to get married and have a child??? A maid and a gold fish???
    I read it to my ex and I could hear her smirking down the line, you're happy huh... I said not a question of being happy, question of making a point... I have the greatest respect for you, you did a great job raising your daughters and you did it without a word of complaint...
    My point being, you make your choices, don't complain....

  11. Randy
    You have made the simple act of giving sound like a chore. I am afraid that if everyone adopted this track of thinking . . . this world would be "void of good". I raise my children to view and accept people for who they are . . . regardless of how fragile and needy. I know my children will make a difference in this world because they are "full of good".

    I am sure that the financial support that you provide to all of the worthy causes you mention above is appreciated. But I wonder if you offered your time and wisdom if it wouldn't be more beneficial? I believe that giving needs to have a "'human" side". Thankfully - there are lots of folks out there that believe on sacrificial giving.

    Maybe you are right . . . the world would be better off with fewer people who want to serve and give of themselves . . . but I for one - am glad that the group won't include me or my children.

      1. Randy, these people have no idea what it takes to get where you've been. After 3 years, I'm slowly gaining an idea, and appreciate your accomplishments that much more.

        Kudos to you for all that you've done, and all the knowledge, mentoring and such you've given away FOR FREE, and all that you continue to do. I know you need no defense, but people who haven't busted their ass for free, for years, giving of their time and energy, and not getting the universe's nod in a financial sense until a few years after, have no clue in hell how much others give before they gain immense wealth on the physical plane.....but I sure do 😉 Keep being selfish, please, the world is better for it!!

        1. Amen to that. Funny how they react tho when you do finally start reaping the rewards of all the hard work (and can therefore be in a position to help more people if you choose). They always say "oh you're so lucky" or "it's easy for you". Yeah right.

      2. You don't see that just writing this blog - and his other blog - is giving time to others - nearly daily he writes serving the masses!!!

        Trust me - for years Randy has given LOADS of horus of love, support, and wisdom to so many areas of my life.

        He's one of the most glorious men I've known. He gifts his humour to light up my days, his focus, his lazer eyes to see through confusion, ... and on and on...

        Whether it's in areas he'd make money from or not - he gives and gives. And he jokes that he's probably never made more than $3 from me... His heart overflows...

        I'm truly grateful (in my weird and wonderful way)

    1. Giving with sacrifice in mind, is no giving at all - but truly a form of taking.

      When you're selfish enough to first give to yourself, then you have an abundance to give to others - that form of giving is then truly a joy because it is NOT from sacrifice, but from love.

      And the reward then is one more priceless than what is given away - because it is joy selfishly devoured, with no guilt nor expectations of any reciprocation. So hence, you are giving for selfish reasons - which is the only real reason why we do anything anyway.

      We are all selfish, and being selfish actually makes us happier - if the true value of being selfish is actually understood & respected. It is the most honorable way to be, because it's honest & it's true when we do only what brings our soul the highest joys. Someone who can't be selfish can't possibly know what's good for others, first they have to know how to be good to themselves aka know how to be selfish.

      I echo Natalie because I have the blessedness of knowing this amazing man personally - he is the most giving person in all forms of that word possible. And he is that way because he truly understands the value of being selfish. Without him looking after his good whenever he started that journey decades ago, we won't have him as a blessing today.

      So, my point is think a little deeper about what his message is trying to convey - it's an amazing breakthrough for personal happiness. I stand witness of this myself. Blessings & love your way.

      PS: hey rocksta, I love you because loving you and knowing that you walk this earth brings me joy & immense happiness. I really get this about love. 🙂 TQ for being you & blazing the path to truth, empowerment, and spirituality. XOXO

  12. Love it!! Intotally inderstand what you are saying. And I love all your affirmations you post on Facebook.

    Thank you

    Toby brand

  13. What exactly are you trying to justify? Your possessions? Your relationships? Your goodness? You Randy? You?

    You don't have to justify any of those things. But, you do need to be careful of what beliefs you indoctrinate people with.

    This is not my blog, it is not me or anyone else people come to read, it is you. You. You alone are responsible for what you write.

    It is wrong of me to try to guilt you into another belief, sorry. I actually don't want you to believe differently, I just want you to realize that some of us including me are coming from a place of vulnerability emotionally. I don't want to be told to become a Libertarian or a moral objectivist.

    I do, it is true, want to be more independent. And I know for sure I don't want to be called crazy anymore! You big JERK!!! (I have a right to that one today!)

    My offended nature does not come from your being prosperous. It comes from your deleterious comments about those who are not. And your comments about those who would gladly sacrafice themselves for others.

    I see why you do it. I am sure it sells. But is it right? Is right to speak the way you do and call yourself a prosperity expert? I don't know anymore. I don't care anymore about your values, or what you personally value in others. Just play nice, it's your blog after all.

    You are right about many things Randy, and you are right about me in a lot of ways. If we destroy each other for different opinions will the world be a better place?

    It is nice that you took your friend to the dentist. I'm sure you are very good friend and lover. I think there will be plenty of people around when you need help, Big Guy, I'm still going to call you that, if it's okay with you.

    I do think we can believe different things and we can both be sane and prosperous. What do you think? Maybe? Huh? Maybe? Okay, you think about it.

    1. PS What does a woman stuffing her mouth with chocolates have to do with the price of tea in China? Although I look that way sometimes. 🙂

      I am so selfish when it comes to chocolates. I don't care who you are, your not getting my chocolates. Ghandi, Mother Theresa, Randy Gage it doesn't matter, get your own!

    2. Annie,

      Why are you on the Blog of PROSPERITY?

      You do not understand Prosperity, and what is required to be prosperous...

      You do not understand history, as well as the fact that history repeats itself...

      You do not understand Capitalism, yet you enjoy everything Capitalists have to offer...

      You do not understand Communism, Socialism and Dictatorship, and take the FREEDOM that you have for granted...

      You do not understand that Altruism was the ONLY weapon of Communism (and no...Communists knew exactly what it meant...). Presently Altruism is the weapon of Socialism...

      And the irony of it all is - not only do you not understand but you do not want to understand...

      You are writing the most insulting posts aimed directly at Randy...
      Later you apologize....And then you do it all over again...and again...and again......

      You do undertand that you do not have to agree with anything writen on the Blog of PROSPERITY....Right?

      And you do understand that your participation is of free will....Right?

      Yet, you are writing that no one will make you believe in Randy's philosophy....

      Annie, you are not a child, you are an adult woman...I am sure that in your lifetime you experienced and learned many things that have value to others. By sharing your experiences you maybe able to help others to overcome their problems....You have a great advantage over me...For instance, I can not relate to many people because I have not experienced things as you have...Your experiences and how you dealt with certain problems can change someone's life for the better...

      Also, if you want to be undertood, then present a valid argument based on information that you know to be a fact...

      Stop bashing one person whose purpose in life is to help others to be the best they can be....

      Yes, Randy is a Capitalist. And it is the Capital that makes the world go round..., not neediness and despair...

      So before you write a nasty reply to this post, think first....
      Think very hard about things you have in your life...the material things...., such as your computer..., the magic of internet and cell phones..., the chair that you're sitting on..., your clothing..., the products that you use to beautify yourself..., feminine products..., the car that you own..., refrigerator and food inside of it...., the stove..., utensils..., books that you have..., pen that you write with..., etc..., etc...

      ALL OF IT WAS and IS CREATED BY CAPITALISTS...those that you despise so...

      Now...now....don't hate just yet....

      Imagine that all of it is gone...

      Imagine going to the store and there is no food, or what's left is stuff that you don't need...

      Imagine going to a car dealership and there are no cars....and the waiting period is 10 years....

      Imagine that your computer broke and you can't find another for sale....Better yet, say your computer is in tact, but you can't get on line...

      Can you imagine that?

      What it would mean is that Capitalists are gone, and when they go they take with them ambition, drive, intellect, innovation and prosperity....

      No more Prosperity Blog...., no more Randy....

      No one is screaming that the rich should give to the poor...., because now everyone is equally poor....

      Is that what you want?

      Once again...., put your emotions on hold....and attempt to use rational thinking....

      Give me a lucid argument (if you want), I believe you can...

      Victoria

      1. No, I don't know how to do it, I guess. I am more emotional than rational.

        Yeah, I have been childish, I will take that critical claim to heart.

        Annie

        1. You, that know Randy and love him, are in my opinion not the most loving of people. So, at this point in the conversation, I think I am happier to be known as his opponent or enemy. Because, I haven't seen empathy, or real kindness from many,but not all of those who love Randy and follow his message. So honestly, maybe you all are getting richer and physically prettier, your hearts seem hard.

          So, I will follow another leader, and hope that instead of using Randy as a path to interpersonal relationships and a teacher of love you will find someone better. In my opinion he has done particularly you Jamie no favors. Your comment was mean spirited towards me.

          I don't usually get mean and nasty with any one but Randy, because he is the leader of this blog and he should be able to take the heat. I am not saying I am right in doing so. If you are trying to prove how lucky you are to know him and that you know real love because of it, you wouldn't have written such a comment. That is not love. That is not light. It is mean and nasty. Not saying that I haven't been. But really. Really go F... yourself.

          Oh yes, with LOVE AND LIGHT,
          Annie

          1. One more thing Jamie, if he was so Great, why does his friends have to keep defending his honor. It should be apparent. It isn't.

          2. Sigh. Annie. Take a chill pill.

            Firstly, my comment has nothing to do with you. I like Victoria’s writing style – it’s very poetic.

            Secondly, here's the truth. I’ve stopped reading your rants for months now. I see your name, and then these long, long, posts – and, I scroll right past them. Because I detest the way you use words so lightly and try to push the buttons of someone you have no idea whom it is. Your posts do not add to my day, they take from it. So since Randy has the grace of still leaving you to rant on his blog like a demented child on Prozac, I respect his decision – but choose not to read/ understand you anymore. If it’s my blog – I would have canned your ass months ago. But it’s not.

            Thirdly, I can be a real bitch but I realized some time back that I also have the power of choice - the choice to add to people’s lives or take from it with every single action and word. And I am of the belief that what I choose to say is a reflection of me, not the person it’s intended to. So I THINK before I speak/ write – and yes, I am thinking when I’m writing this reply to you.

            So - I am not interested to hurt you, for I am not hurt myself anymore; and you seem already terribly wounded. I have no idea why, and I probably can emphatize if I knew your story, but I’m not in the game to buy your stories or help you justify why it's ok to tell other people to f**k themselves on their own blog in so many different ways, over so many different posts – every other day. We all have our stories, it's never OK to lash out at someone else. As for you telling me to f**k myself, I take no offense personally & you're forgiven.

            Lastly, why we defend Randy is not that he needs defending – but because he has too much class & grace to get into a bitchy nonsensical cat fight with you that’s gonna lead nowhere. So when we can’t stand it anymore, we speak up out of our own personal annoyance with your incessant need to attack him AND contaminate this space where we come to for inspiration. So it's not about protecting him, it's about protecting the space.

            Also, while I am totally clear too that this conversation may lead nowhere with you – I choose to respond to you today because I hope that you understand that (1) I am not interested in attacking you & (2) that you can’t get love without understanding you first have to love yourself. And that shows. In every sentence you write. I gave up on sarcasm b/c it's totally lack – so truly, am sending you love & light, because love heals all & I am hoping you will allow it to heal you too.

            PS: You will recognize honor when you choose to be honorable.

          3. Perhaps one day I will forgive your unkindness, lies, and ignorance. But, not today. When that day comes I will truly wish you love and light.

            Annie

          4. Jamie,

            I'm over it. Sorry, if I truly did misunderstand you. I hope you do read my posts sometimes. I say some good stuff sometimes.

            I read yours, because sometimes they make me laugh.

            Annie

          5. Annie

            MAny years ago a mentor said to me that I was needy and that he hated being around me - I thought he was an arsehole. Actually I see he was being kind, generous, and very helpful.

            Many people may have listened to my woes, loved me, cared for me - NONE of that niceness made me change.

            It was HIS comment that got me thinking about who I was and how I came across. It was the most selfless comment of the lot. He didn't care if I liked him or not, but he knew that I needed a home truth to change me.

            You may think I'm lovely, kind, sweet, and that Sean is a sweetie pie... Actually we probably have not served you as much as Jamie.

            I'll give you a little context about Jamie - I've stayed with her and her dad for a few days (even tho I had never met her before - she kindly welcomed me in). She stayed up late into the night with me giving me insights. She's held my hand at an event where I knew one person. When I looked into this strangers eyes she breathed me in. And she oozed liquid love out of every cell. She did that because she's a kind hearted gorgeous woman, AND she's a remarkable leader that touches and changes people's lives - and now I can see why and how after her post to you. She doesn't waste time being nice - she serves in being real and true.

            It takes both challenge and support to change. Jamie may feel harsh here - and she speaks wisely. She's hitting a home truth Annie, I think you're strong enough to hear it and use it as the ball to coming running home to the greatest Annie you can be. It's an exciting time for you Annie - to stop being that child and become the leader you can be that inspires rather than kills people off.

            Just so you know, I too have stopped reading comments here because I commited to myself that I would have a drama free year. No issues and just having a magic year. Letting go of relationships, beliefs, habits, things that do not hold me high in joy and greatness. You bring drama into most days here so I had to let go reading this blog too. I read Randy's words, tho ignore the comments. I'm committed to creating value where people want it. You want to argue. I want to make a difference.

            Maybe you'll hear Jamie's words, and ask yourself how they might be true? How might they serve you to become your greatest? Ask yourself: who can I be to make a diiference in a positive way that doesn't put others down? How can I be my highest self that leaves me happy, joyous, free and thrilled to be me?

          6. Annie,

            No sorry's/ justifications are necessary. It's done & over. You deserve to know the truth of how you are coming across so you can make some different choices, if you choose to. Someone gave me that choice a long time ago & started me on my path to personal mastery.

            There's only one solution towards healing if you would care to take it: Forgive & love yourself. Everyone deserves unlimited chances, but only you can give that to yourself. Not Randy, not this blog, not anyone else. Just you. You are enough as you are now, and have always been. When you get that, you won't feel threatened by diversity, you won't need approval/ attention from anyone, and you would never think that anyone is out to attack you. It's a good place to be. You deserve to be there.

            Natalie - Love you too sista. Keep glowing! <3

  14. It's taken me 53 years to understand and believe most of what you've said here, Randy, and I was in misery (self-induced) most of that time. Thankful that I'm finally starting to "get it" - and to live fully. Thanks for your wisdom!

  15. Let me see if I have this straight. If I have not met my own needs and figured out what makes me feel happy healthy and whole inside my own head and in my skin I simply can not hope to do the same for another. In that I must be "self"-ish. I must look to my "Self". Are the needs of my "Self" being met? Lots of people have quoted scriptures and famous philanthropists in their outrage at the thought of being called "selfish" Yet Jesus clearly stated when asked which of the commandments (that being the 10 Commandments) was greatest. He said the greatest commandment was to love God (by whatever name you call Him/Her) with all of our heart soul and strength. The second commandment he said was like the first "Love your neighbor as much as you love yourself." Well, if you were to look at that second commandment logically then you would HAVE to love yourself first before you can love your neighbor. That states pretty clearly to me that I have to be taking care of myself (being self-ish) before I can take care of the guy next door. I say be a rebel and learn to love yourself enough to be capable of loving your neighbor.

  16. "In a healthy relationship, you choose the person you love, and you fall in love with them because they bring happiness to your life. This is the highest compliment and honor you can ever pay another human being – that you love them for the selfish reason of the happiness and joy they bring you."

    I like 🙂

  17. I have cried over this post. I really don't like personal arguments and yeah, I suppose I started it. I don't like the idea of one set of people being right and good, and the other set being a herd or wrong and bad.

    And, although I called Randy everything but I child of God, I don't want anyone to think he is bad either. I think Randy has a lot of good to offer and does. No matter what I or anyone says. To need this blog for soothing egos and justification is really kinda crazy too Randy. You should not have to justify yourself. If you are happy, who cares?

    I believe we can all have different political views and learn from one another. That is what we are really fighting about. Whether or not one person is totally right and sane or if another is totally wrong and bad? It is not the truth on either side.

    I agree that no sane person would say you shouldn't love yourself and take care of yourself. That would be crazy. Yes people do it. But, we are all different. Some people give and give and don't take care of themselves and they get tired and yes probably a little crazy. Personality is a factor though. Some people find pure joy in giving without the expection of some external reward, so therefore they are still finding joy. Some people give away that which benefits them in an Altruistic manner because they put the greater good over their own best interest. Does not mean all who do are crazy. Should anyone feel forced to do that or guilty if they don't no.

    The "Greater Good" is not dangerous, unless misinterpreted and misused as a form of control. Now, I know it sounds like I am making an argument for no taxes and no having to be forced by the government to take care of others. I AM NOT.

    I believe that by definition a democracy is the people's will for the most part. No, it doesn't always happen that way, but it should. We vote in America, sometimes the person you want wins and sometimes they don't. But, majority has the say, that is a democracy, what most people think is best goes. Right or Wrong it goes. How else do you do it with so many people? Totalitarian Rule? One Person decides? Anarchy, everybody doing whatever they want? That would get confusing, if we didn't all agree. If we all agree I suppose Anarchy would work. But we are individuals and that's why Democracy works, because we all have different ideas. Thank God for that. I think that way we achieve balance. Because you know what no belief is all right or all wrong usually, we find the wholeness and truth by putting disparate parts together.

    I believe that it is for the "greater good" to have Universal Health Care, even though there will problems with it and some will get free cheese while others flip the bill. Because for me it is brutal the thought of people not being able to get health care when their lives are at stake. I see it as mass murder really.

    If America was truly a Capitalist paradise where everyone could truly do all the things Randy said, then yes it would be wrong. But America's Capitalism while having many wonderful strengths has been weakened by self intererested behavior like slavery and holocaust. Equality has not been achieved yet, it has been spoiled by all of us. Americans have been many good things, but we have also been greedy and prejudiced and evil.

    We have to remedy first inequality, because right now not everyone truly has the opportunity to become prosperous. They can perhaps in the future, but first we all need to agree on giving away our incomes to help people become healthy and able through health care and education. Yes, by teaching them to fish, but first before you can teach a person to fish they must be fit enough to throw out the net.

    Anyway, I think if we have equal opportunites and healthy well educated people, we can eventually have pure democracy and capitalism. I hope it happens.

    I understand the frustration of not agreeing with the government or not bein aligned with the ruling party. But, I know for better or worse we ordered it some way. And if what we ordered turns out wrong hopefully we can fix it.

    Democracy is also flailing in America. We are Propagandized and pushed around sometimes by a few in power when truly in a Democracy we should feel our voice counts. I hope we all work to keep democracy safe by not buying into propaganda on either side of the political lines.

    I believe to that when it comes to health care if we all heard the real truth we would agree to give and help our fellow humans, because in the long run or the short run it will help us all. I hope too if it happens and those who don't agree with it will realize that perhaps the majority of the people believed it was the best thing for now, and democracy worked.

    Randy I don't agree with churches telling me what to do and believe pollitically anymore than I agree with you doing it. You see on your blog you are in a position of power. Most see you as a mentor and teacher, just as flocks of parishs see the priest as their teacher. You are not guilty of being unkind or uncharitable or unfriendly. What I accused you of was an abuse of power.

    You abuse your power when manipulating those who come to you for personal help growth, and you tell them they should believe in certain political or philosophical stances in order to have what you have. Which is a lot of money and influence. Everybody wants that. It is no better than my priest telling me to vote against stem cell research. You get it? The priest is telling us if we want to be good we have to vote the way the church wants us to. That is what you are doing and it is wrong. You are saying if you want to be prosperous and happy you must be a Libertarian or a moral objectivist. Just as there are many roads to Heaven there are many roads to prosperity.

    If you say self love is the only road to happiness you are correct. But that is not exactly all you have said is it?

    1. Annie,

      Okay, you want a Universal Health Care.....

      So...., are you willing to pay 60%-70% of your gross pay for "free" health care?

      Also, are you willing to wait six months for an operation, hence there will be shortage of doctors and nurses...?

      Any idea as to why Canadians come to United States for health care....?

      Any idea why Canada will let you live there if you're a doctor or a nurse?

      Do the research and come back with facts....NOTHING IS FREE.....NOTHING!

      Victoria

      1. I know Victoria, I am sure there is truth to what you are saying. But, I just have to respectfully disagree. I see health care as a right to every individual.

        We pay so much for health insurance, I don't think we would even notice the difference in income, if it truly does end up being that large of a precentage. If it is, 60-70% Dear God help us! Whew, that would be terrible.

        Americans go to Canada too, for health care. There are flaws in both ways. I hope there will always be people like you around to bring balance. And if people have to wait that long for operations, I will be crying fowl with you.

        I like your passion Victoria even if we don't agree.

        Annie

      2. You know why I like this blog Victoria? Because I need it. It brings me balance. I need to be less needy and less giving what I haven't got. But, I still hold to certain principles.

        Annie

        Peace? I'm waving my little white flag, can you see it? 🙂

        1. Annie,

          Of course, peace and love only....:)

          And I respect your principles....:)

          It is your delivery that in most cases is confusing....

          I found the following in one of the books that I am reading:

          "Love must be learned,

          and learned again and again;

          there is no end to it.

          Hate needs no instruction,

          but wants only to be provoked."

          -Katherine Anne Porter

          Victoria

      3. Victoria-

        There are no easy answers around health care. The fact is we, as tax payers, already pay an incredible amount covering the uninsured who wait until a problem is acute and then go to an emergency room for treatment. In the western state that I live in (not California), there is compelling evidence that shows that universal coverage will be actually be less costly than what we spend now (including state money through our taxes that cover the uninsured). I won't pretend to have the answers but something has to change.

  18. I got sloppy with my commas, I hope everyone understands where the commas go, and understand what I say.

    Randy, you are brave to leave your blog open to comments of any kind. It is also really brave to join the discussion, especially when it is not all positive towards you. You got guts Big Guy, I will give you that. 🙂 You never said I couldn't call you Big Guy anymore.

  19. I keep thinking, maybe I should stop. Or stop writing, one or the other. Anyhow, "the greater good" is a powerful one and dangerous. It is dangerous in that, everyday soldiers die for the "greater good". Are they crazy? Are they crazy because they put their beliefs or cause above themselves? I don't know? I am humbled and in awe of their sacrafices. They do it to protect a cause they believe in, something they see as greater than even themselves.

    I guess I would have to say when it is for truly good honorable puproses to put yourself in harms way for another, you are truly being heroic. We have this blog and other things in America like freedom of speech because of the Altruistic Heroes that came before us. Some died for a belief that they felt would benefit everyone in the long run.

    Most parents would tell you they would gladly put themselves in harms away for their children. Is is right? You have to ask yourself that.

    Activists go to prison, like Vaclav Havel and Martin Luther King Jr. for their activism and beliefs. That is an Altruistic act. They put their belief in the Good of All before their own comfort and safety. Are they crazy? Once again, I am sure there will be varying opinions.

    Victoria- Altruists put their belief that communism was evil and detrimental to their country, before, their own self interest, in order to get rid of it, for the "greater good". BTY, My first real love came from a communtist country, and he loved me even though I was a "tree hugger", that's what he called us left wingers. 🙂 One thing we had in common though was our love of Vaclav Havel.

  20. I began reading a lot of new age books several years ago and the idea of being selfless was always being imposed.

    I did the selfless life for a while and it doesn't work. it left me drained, broke, and hopeless.

    I was born selfish and I will die selfish. Thanks Randy...

    P.S. My website takes donations. Thanks in advance.

  21. Randy,what about Jesus?Is he the ideal human being for you?What role does Christ have in your life?Just curious

      1. You know the curious thing about your position on Christ is mostly that you dislike the Christian Fundamentalists.

        Randy you are a fundamentalist. Not a Christian fundamentalist, but right wing, Libertarian fundamentalist. Look at how many of your beliefs are fundamental. I am sure will not see but, I do.

        I still believe you hold Christian values. But are you sure you have interpreted them correctly. Christ was not a fundamentalist, many of his thoughts and practices were paradoxical.

        Ask yourself, would Christ be for or against universal health care? If you could just sit and talk with him, imagine. Christ, not the church, not religion. Jesus the philosopher and teacher. Pretend you have a one on one class together. We still don't have to agree, but I bet you will find an incongruency there. If you don't fine. Maybe Jesus would agree with you. But maybe not.

        Randy you are good guy, Iv'e been bad mostly, not you. I need to revisit the self discipline posts. 🙂

        1. Annie,

          I read your posts on "Jesus" blog...., you were great!!!

          Talking about logic....you have it!!!

          Victoria

          1. Victoria, We did a fine job arguing together and I consider you friend, whether we agree on everthing or not. I like it better when we agree though! 🙂

            Annie

          2. Annie,

            Like I wrote before...,

            You are a smart cookie!

            And it also takes one with passion to recongnize the passion of the other...
            ....Therefore, friends we are!

            But don't think that I wont's bite back....And do expect you to do the same....preferably without emotions 🙂

            But in case..., I'll be wearing my Russian armor 🙂

            Agreeing is okay..., but learning most of the time takes divergence....

            All is well!
            Love and light to you... (and I always mean it..., sarcasm is not my thing).

            Victoria

        2. He would've shown you that you don't need to have health care coverage as health is a natural state and is allowed to emerge from within.

      2. Randy,

        I just read the "Jesus" blog....

        If you survived that one..., you can and will endure anything....!!!

        YOU ARE BEST!!!!!

        Victoria

  22. I just finished getting my home off-grid and buying my first electric car is next. The day I allow Randy to dictated if I am worthy because of how much things I have,that's the day I gave up my rational thinking.
    Anyone that doesn't think like you is part of the herd.
    A nurse is part of the herd because she doesn't have passive income.
    Your softballs friends are losers because they are not millionaries
    the counselor that help break your negative pattern is a loser.
    the doctor that saved your life when you were shot.
    Just irrational beliefs because you know how to make money passively.
    Why haven't you manifested a private jet? Maybe,because it is not important to you.
    Why would I want to travel around the world and not see my daughter?so I can more money. Different values.
    You are part of the herd because you believe your thoughts--as though your thoughts are the ultimate reality.
    Have you ever question what is beyond beliefs (a bunch of thoughts)?

    1. At first, I felt kinda bad for Randy when I read this. Now all I have to say is GO ENRIQUE! And on a personal note do you think we should just get away from reading this material?

      Annie

  23. I won't add much here because I came in a bit late in the discussion(was on a selfish vacation - which I also treated my kids to!) - and there have been some great comments here already, but ...

    I used to be this kind of crazy ... in fact I was the 'saver of the world' for about 47 years - and it really never got me or (more importantly) the people I wanted to serve/save to a better place.

    Not to prosperity.
    Not to health.
    Not to peace.

    It simply just fueled the cycle of broken/need to be fixed - broken worse/need to be fixed more.

    It wasn't until about a year ago that I finally decided that helping others at the delay of taking care of MYSELF was not working!!! What was amazing was that once I began to become 'self-ful' (putting myself at the top of my own list and taking care of my needs so others wouldn't have to) that many of those around me whom I was so busy 'helping' before sat up and took notice.

    When I started caring for my own health - suddenly, my kids wanted to eat the good stuff I was! Once I got my act together, my friends quit feeling sorry for themselves and began asking me what I was doing differently so that they could get their own lives on track.

    Well ... either that or they simply slipped away and latched onto others who would still indulge their 'stuckness'. 🙂

    This is a simple, but fierce world we live and play in. There are prizes as big as your mind and heart can imagine, but you have to have the guts, the spirit and the discipline to go after what you want. No one else is going to do it for you. The best part is,when you start to reap the rewards, it feels AMAZING to be able to share that with others from a place of abundance, not because your identity of 'world's greatest giver' needs polishing!

    Take care of yourself first, not instead, of others - this alone will transform the planet!

    K

    1. Yes no one can disagree with that philosophy. No hidden agenda. Good for you, Kimbralee.

      People need to hear that, not that they are crazy, for certain beliefs. And yes, yes you are talking about the unhealthy side of feeling that one must save the world. You are not calling people who do good selfless acts lunatics.

      However, our holy mentor has run amuck, and gone political and not to mention been just plain mean spirited.

  24. Randy, you sir are in no way a person who should be mentoring anyone in personal growth. You should be able to stand up to my attacks and defend my right to be different. You won't.

    You will tell me, I have no right to make personality comments, then you do to it to me and let others. I did attack you, but in some ways I think we can agree that is different, it is your site and you can edit comments you want.

    You are not a happy and prosperous person, you are mean spirited. I am sorry I had any faith in you at all. I did want to learn from you. Now, I don't know. How can you pass off what you have done here as helpful?

    1. I realize you think everything is about you, but if you look through this whole series, you will find nothing anywhere with me attacking you personally. Nothing. When I talk about comments or reactions of readers, it appears you feel so guilty you see it as a personal attack. I would never do that to you or anyone else on this blog. I'm looking for discourse or even spirited debate on the issues, not slander against individuals.

      Just a thought: you could vehemently disagree with something here and state that without all these personal insults and attacks. You could say, "I think that idea is crazy and here's why..." Or "That argument makes no sense because..."

      When you can learn to do that, your viewpoints will get taken a lot more seriously, because you'll be debating the issues with critical thinking skills instead of the name calling and personal disparagement. Just a thought...

      -RG

      1. Randy,

        You can fool some of the people some of the time, but you cannot fool all of the people all of the time.

        There are truths and lies all in one in this comment. That is why these conversations are difficult and confusing. Half Truths are always worse than a complete lie.

        I will be a monkey's uncle if this was not at least in part a reaction to my arguments and comments from the previous posts. You can say anything you would like, you are not going to get me to believe it is not.

        I will claim my mistakes and do most of the time, and you know it. I have used I feel statements and you know it.

        We do not have the benefit of personally knowing each other so sometimes it is difficult to discern in what way some comments are intended. That is at least some of the problem sometimes.

        I see you as a guide and mentor. It is you that usually gets my out of control anger and insults. I do project onto you. If you are not ready to do group therapy stop trying. You cannot be both participant and leader and do each successfully.

        Look back a couple of posts at how nice Sean was with my bad behavior. He didn't let me off the hook, he didn't say what I did was okay but he had empathy. EMPATHY.

        When I see mean personal things to you, which, is not all the time, it comes from a dark place in me that needs to be inspected with a light. Yes, I feel bad when it happens. If you are the great mentor Natalie says, why don't you just say something helpful? There is a fine line my friend between tough love and being hateful. You have to know when to be gentle and when to be firm and when to combine the two.

        We are dealing with two different issues. ONE:Our Relationship to each other on this blog. TWO:Whether or not you are being misleading in your attemp to be inspiring others self growth.

        I get angry when I lay my soul vulnerable only to find out that what I say, might be construed as agreeing with some crazy idea about altruism and selfishness. With these lasts posts it is hard to see the forest for the trees. I see the trees and the forest, and I think despite some of my more irrational posts, I did a damn good job explaining why I felt that way. NO comment from you. You should have commented not because I just wanted your attention, but because you really should have. I made excellent points on this post about why I felt you were wrong. You did not say a peep, you just were content to let others insult me. That hurt, that caused me to cry, because sometimes I'm stupid enough to think you might be my friend.

        I beg for your attention sometimes it is true, but I have been working on not doing it. I will own that. I will own that I take things personally when I shouldn't sometimes. But I will not own being wrong about this post being partly directed toward me, because I feel to state otherwise would be a prevarication.

        So sorry if I hurt your feelings Randy. I sometimes look at you as being impervious to my insults, because you seem so above the fray. I think he will see that nonsense for what it is.

        When I make some claims though, I am being honest. It is not to hurt you it is to help you see something you are doing as not entirely loving. You want to help us so much, it only seems fair to help you sometimes too.

        I have made many mistakes in my life for sure, some I have not and may never share here; it doesn't always seem safe. I feel guilty for them too, as I should. Don't tell me, I know. I also assert my right to make mistakes and learn from them, as everyone should have that right.

        You are usually very kind to me Randy, when I have made life not that easy for you, so thank you. Sometimes, I do think you have written things because you thought it might make me happy as well as others. For instance, the time you used the feminine pronoun, I thought that was very sweet. Also, the picture of Prague, it made me cry, in a good way. Even if you weren't thinking of me a little when you did those things, I loved them.

        Annie

        PS Look at the good work Victoria and I did on this blog. It isn't an entirely toxic blog. She and I argued came to our own conclusions and made up. I really like that woman, I understand her anger with me, just as I understand my own. Anyway, we did good and added peace, love and understanding in the world.

        1. Annie,

          Oh dear Annie!!!

          RG is VERY clear on what comments are allowed: "fun, brilliant, add to the dialogue." That may be a brilliant guide for us all, eh?

          Write out our comments and before hitting enter ask ourselves: "does this add, is it fun, brilliant, and critical to promote our greatness?" THen we can ALL come to the blog KNOWING that we're giving our best and creating an atmosphere and space that we can be known as inspirational, creative, amazing, and leaders that touch, uplift and transform lives. That people can come here KNOWING they're going to be treated with respect and honoured (INCLUDING RG!!!!!!)... That we honour the qualities of prosperity - which for me are loving, open, fresh, curious, accepting, playful, vulnerable, empathic, caring, courageous, intentional...

          What's your intent when you come here annie? Often it feels thtat you're here to cause a storm, and create hate. That may have been your past Annie - but it doesn't have to be your future. You can choose to be Great.

          You have greatness in you. At some point rather than wishing RG gave YOU attention, you'll begin to give yourself the attention you want from him. You'll feed yourself with greatness, and stop begging it from him, and giving to yourself. You'll selifishly realise that attacking him is only attacking yourself. And that YOU are the one who has to give to you, to save you, to touch your own life... And at that point.. you may begin to ponder...

          I'm getting excited that at some point you'll begin to ask yourself

          *who am I attacking? (because it is not Randy really - it may feel real - but look deeper and further back in your life)

          *who am I hating? (RG has done nothing here but serve - who is it who's upset you in your life that you are now taking it out on Randy?)

          *Who lied to you that makes you think Randy is lying? (He has a statement that he said the first week I spoke with him: "I will never knowingly lie to you." I promise you that's true for you too Annie - so check in when you think he's lying, because it's the anger you feel from someone else that you put on him - I bet!)

          * who gave you half truths Annie = because RG is pretty clear with his thinking? Who have you put onto him that is NOT who he is?

          * who is the one wanting group therapy? - Randy has DONE that already... he doesn't want it now, that's why he doesn't leap in. Who's the one needing to own stuff rather than project it?

          * DO you notice the double binds you create: "leap in and I make you wrong, don't leap in and I attack you for not commenting?" Either way RG can not win in your mind. Why do you want him to fail Annie? Who is it that you wish had failed? That you wanted to hurt for getting at you? That you felt betrayed by and could never fully show your hurt to? When you deal with it Annie you'll be so gloriously free.... I PROMISE Randy does not want to get at you. There are times I've thought he wanted to get at me. It NEVER was true. When he DOES want to get at me he'll say "Go check I wrote a blog for you" or he'll let me know clearly when I'm not doing what I need to be doing! Lol!

          *why if someone gives you attention are they good? MANY people don't and they are good... and they add peace/love/understanding? Do they have to communicate with YOU for that to happen? RG does that DAILY with his blog - yet in your attack and insults you MISS his intention of giving value... Why do you see his intention ALWAYS or MOSTLY as wrong? Who is it that wronged you that you WISHED could give you the right attention? It's not RG I promise you!

          * Who's the one who's trying to be participant and leader? Who's the one who's trying to control who speaks, how they speak, what they say, who they communicate with, which words are okay for RG to use, what's okay and what's not okay, who's commenting on everything and lashing out to get attention and say which posts are right or not?

        2. Annie, I laughed when you wrote that you consider Randy a friend!! What is a FRIEND to you? Someone who you shit all over and they take it like a doormat. Someone who you treat badly and they never react? Someone who's there for you no matter what? Paulo Coelho says that a true friend is not someone who's there in your worst (that's someone who's toxic who feeds off your weakness) but someone who celebrate joy with you - laughs, delights, and enjoys your Greatness.

          Do you truly consider yourself a friend? are you loving, treasuring, kind? Would YOU want to be friends with YOU if you treated you like you treat Randy?

          You are audacious in your awesomeness!!!! I don't even consider myself to be Randy's friend. He would NEVER hang out here with me, he'd never come to see me even if he's in the same country, he'd never walk over to say hi to me even if I'm in the same room as him. He'd never call to ask for my advice. He'd never call to tell me his secrets, he'd never call to share his ups and downs with me. He's not my friend. It's not a mutual relationship. I'm not that arrogant to assume it's a close friendship - I can WISH it was more, but I don't deserve it. It's unlikely that I'll ever be his friend. When I get to where he is in his being, thinking, doing, having he'll be 100% more amazing... I've seen him change in the 10 years I've known him each and every year... As I change so does he. I'm under no illusion that I'll ever be close to him. Sure he loves me. But I'm not a friend. He has 3/4 friends maybe 5. Real friends... I'm not one of them. I'm not worthy of being one of them - I'm a pain in the arse a lot of the time to him!!!!! And I can imagine him laughing - because when I tell him he's not my friend, he's telling others he is!!!!! And I'm grateful because I haven't been awesome enough to be his friend... One day... When I become the Greatness that he sees me as when I forget who I can be! Cos we have a laugh and enjoy each other... But now I'm still too distorted in my thinking and being to host his heart and life... I've got a lot of growing to do til then...

          Regarding licking his arse - a mutual friend of mine and RG asked me to lick his ear, does that count???!!!!! LOL!

          One final thought... MY dear friend Bob Burg always says: CHECK YOUR PREMISES then you're on the same page... So, what is a guide and a mentor for you?

          For me - it's someone who leads the way, and a mentor is someone to shows me the path because they've done it already. It's someone I learn from, respect, and earn their time from because I'm applying what they teach the best I can...

          Where did you come to think that you are entitled to attack and treat him like shit? PArt of that entitlement is out of a victim mentality - that you feel you are owed and deserving of something when you aren't. He owes you nothing! He offers things out of goodness...

          Who showed you that attacking those who are good to you is how to be? It's not fair, right or healthy!

          Where did you learn that because someone is in a leadership position they deserve to be attacked? Who taught you that those in authority are objects for projections and can just be attacked?

          Where did you learn that a mentor is also a therapist and trained to give emotional healing? And take transferance?

          Randy isn't trained as a therapist. He's simply a high school drop out who had a drug problem who totally transformed his life, got out of being a victim and decided to evolve into his highest potential in every way possible. If you'd like to achieve your potential in every way possible this is the blog for you...

          If not... I ponder if you're in the right place? xoxo

          1. I hadn't read this one, when I wrote my last comment. Natalie, excuse me, but what the hell?

            If Randy knows you and talks to you, and wouldn't acknoweledge you in a crowd, I would call that man a horses back end. EWWW! I wouldn't care to know him if he was like that. Who does he think he is the Millonaire Messiah? (That's a joke) Randy is a person Natalie. If he is really like that, which I know we don't know maybe, then he is not a very nice one, or an exteremely narcissitic one at best.

            If you think you are not enough yet to be his friend, you are sadly mistaken, and if he thinks that, he is mistaken too.

            Honestly, and you will find this extremely arrogant I suppose, I am not sure Randy is worthy of my friendship. How's that grab ya?

          2. It kinda graps me as sad Annie - why would you want to manipulate everything anyone says into something they didn't say to prove your point that they are awful when you don't know him? Hmmm....

            What's intersting to me is you avoid all accountability for your actions (blaming him, others, or saying you righteously are proud of being arrogant and honest), yet you do not respond to ANY queries on why you are here, what energy you'd like to create here, what gives you the right to treat him like shit, and why you ONLY choose to REACT rather than learn?

            I guess your BEHAVIOUR speaks volumes - the ONLY thing you are going to do is attack him.

            Just so I'm clear... and I hope you get it now: Annie - you twist words to make YOUR point - to prove your distorted reality that he's a terrible, arrogant man. That's NOT my reality!!!! I love Randy dearly and am highly and heavenly grateful. I'm so aprpeciate that hes in my life. He's amazing... and you can be happy and joyful too to be here rather than demanding, and violating. It's an honour to be on this blog - not your RIGHT. Instead you come here being entilted, angry, aggresive, catty, bitchy and looking for the worst!!!!

            I NEVER said he didn't acknowledge me. He acknowledges me everytime he sees me with beaming smiles, joyful welcoming, humour, warmth and authenticity. He jokes with me, and makes everyone laugh at my silly ways with me. In a room of 5000 people he does not look for me and come to find me to ensure I'm okay. He KNOWS I'll find him if I need him and if I don't we'll email which is quieter and easier for him with masses around. When there are hundreds of people trying to get some of him he doesn't come to worry over me. I respect his time and space a lot. When we get a chance we touch base and I feel special and adored - as does he! At big events he's having to meet lines of people who all want bits of him... He's having photo's taken at every second, signing books, meeting people, answering questions, hearing stories... and so gracious to everyone. Giving them everything they need! It's a LOT! And must be draining and exhausting. At those events I am not thinking "what can he do for me?" but I ponder "what might RG need from me to make his time easier and happier?" or "is there anything I could ask him to record for others that would inspire them and touch their lives" so when we do have time together I utilise it to make a difference... He's VERY generous like that!

            At any break if I'm in the same area we chat if he has the time, energy, and space... he does videos for my kids and my fb group... he's generous hearted and sweet. When he's leading, hosting, speaking, and running an event he doesn't have TIME to socialise... He's rushing, organising, sorting things out, presenting.

            You missed my point of RESPECT and high regard for a mentor vs assuming a right to be a friend when that is not the function of our relationship (he called to be my MENTOR, not my friend. I am truly BLESSED and honoured, and grateful, I don't assume to be more than that!) You manipulated it into your distorted reality of DISRESPECT and attack where you feel entitled to assume you can take and demand friendship like it's your right - where in fact that's something that's given out of mutual joy and delight. WOW!

            You want him to be a friend when you choose to see him as a horses end, arrogant, not nice, narcisstic and stinky - rather than understanding the motive, the time constraints, the work, leadership, the admiration, treasuring... Why do you always go to see the worst Annie? Why come here if you don't want to learn from him and want to find ways and reasons to hate him, rather than unlearn your own self-hatred? Why are out out to prove hers an arsehole?

            I guess if your reality of yourself is such - that is ALL you can see in others.

    2. Annie,

      You know at times I have challenges with Randy - and I'll say to him "Randy, When x/y happened I was hurt, I feel unmet and unheard... " Or whatever... And he'll share what he thinks, and we'll go on back and forth until we resolve things. And he'll use humour and make me laugh... and show me how I can relate with lightness and not be so caught in drama/victim cycles. He shows me how I can be more peaceful, loving and strong in relationships - without being so reactive when I disagree with him. SO I can understand the challenges that you have... He'll even joke with me... call me names to make me laugh so I break out of my resistance and stuckness. I'm grateful for him doing this - because it teaches me how to do this for myself. He highlights when I'm stuck, so I can become aware for myself when I'm stuck and get out of it.

      I'm aware you sometimes don't notice you're stuck in an abusive comment - it just comes out and you can't stop it. You only realise afterwards. That must be hard to see afterwards you doing that... and being cruel and harsh without being able to stop yourself. This doesn't make you a bad person - you wouldn't be here if you weren't a bad person. You're here because you want to learn how to come right - to be open, loving, amazing and all you can be in life. Though sometimes the way you have been treated comes flooding out without you knowing how to change it...

      I can understand that at times you don't feel love, and maybe you see the love that some of us feel here from Randy and you want that too - and not having that is sore and hard for you. And when you're stressed or oversensitive that comes out in judgment rather than saying how you feel hurt, unloved, uncared for and unmet. It's okay to say "I feel desperately wanting attention, I feel needy and want more..." Tho insulting Randy personally is not okay. I know it might be hard to see that in the moment. That maybe they feel like the same thing... And that you're justified in your attack. You are not. It is not okay to attack Randy. He's a generous soul who writes her to serve others because he's a good, kind man. He has tremendous integrity and is someone who truly wants to (and DOES) make a huge difference. You wonder why we come out to share her goodness? You see - when I go off the rails and forget myself he'll call me to remind me how I can break through. Or he'll say "I wrote a blog for you - check it out..." or he'll twitter me a comment with love so I stay on track. He's ALWAYS reminding me where I'm slipping up, and where I'm great. That he believes in me. FOR FREE. He doesn't get paid to love me. He does it simply because he's a good man. Even tho sometimes I think differently/wrongly/distortedly when i'm feeling insecure - that I couldn't imagine that he'd give so much time and effort to me for nothing. In those times I burst into tears and he reminds me how much he cares for nothing, just because he sees greatness in me... and it thrills him to see me living that. I have never had such love - so consistently without punichment, rejections, cruelty, silent treatment, abuse... (apart from my kids) so it's feels like it's been forever for me to actually allow him to love me, and give to me... It takes a lot for me to let him in. So when you do attack him - I do feel enraged because you don't see how sweet he is. And you treat him like an object of your projections, rather than a human being - who feels, has a heart, who cares and loves a lot. Annie - he even cares a lot about you! Which is why he doesn't remove you... He understands you - because he was there once... He was in that victim space and grew out of it...

      I know it's hard to trust him, and his ways. I know he speaks in passionate and wild language that you seem to react to and find hard when you take personally. That reaction is your gift to show you the edges that still need loving in you. They aren't the things to attack Randy for. He communicates like that to trigger the beliefs that hold you back. It's purposeful to SERVE you, not to piss you off!

      I see writing on this blog is hard for you. I see you haven't been taught how to own what you feel and express yourself without attack. That must be hard now having had those role models to show you... You haven't been taught how to relate without insult, blame, attack, judgment, and resentments...

      You read something of Randy's and take it personally and react. You then reread what you write and realise that it's attacking but you feel justified because he attacked you (when he hasn't and won't).

      Then because you have attacked Randy personally others come to show the other side to balance that out (a natural and normal equilibriation process) - to bring correction to your harsh attacks that are not based on a reality of knowing, meeting or loving Randy - but on your assumptions, personal insecurities, and need for attention.

      When you don't get that attention you go more negative and attack him in every response you can. Even if the person is saying NOTHING about Randy - you bring it into the conversation to attack him personally. It's like you don't mind what attention you get - you just are gagging for attention for him - whether its positiv eor negative you don't mind. You just need a fix of him. Then you settle for a while- until you need the next dose.

      I'm wonder here if you can learn to speak in ownership - I language? It may help to get the book "How to Speak so Kids will Listen and Listen so kids will speak." By Faber and Malzish. It shows you how to go from reaction into feelings, ownership, and healthy expression.

      I use this book for teaching parenting classes - and it's great for parents who were not allowed feelings and weren't allowed to express what they feel, and thus don't have a feeling language and don't know how to discuss what's happening for them without reaction.

      ONe final thought is this. Randy is the most loving person I know. Hands down. His love isn't always NICE, comfortable and easy. It's very tough at times. And only because he knows that sometimes i do things that sabotage myself and he gives me the strength I need for both of us, until I've stopped wobbling and grown it in myself.

      When he's TOUGH loving sometimes it hurts me - and I share that. He reminds me that he loves me. And I get to see that because I'm hurting it's often because of the pain or yuck stuff that happened to me as a kid and I'm projecting it onto him. He holds me in his heart and reminds me that it's not that, and he has my greatness at stake, and he believes in me. While my mother - for instance - finds it hard to celebrate my Greatness, Randy consistently and strongly reminds me of who I am.

      In my distorted thinking I might get angry with Randy about something - and he;ll break it down to show me that my thinking is wrong. I'm okay with being wrong - when I see it not serving me...

      One thing I've struggled with is letting Randy love me. Because I didn't always feel loved in childhood learnign to RECEIVE his love has ben challenging. I fight him off in my mind, rather than relax into it. When he tells me he does sometimes I used to think "you're just saying that to make me feel better" Maybe you have this too? Maybe because you can't receive love because you didn't get it you constantly push, attack, argue to keep people away to prove that you are unlovable? I promise you it feels SO much better to let others in...

      Growing up with a single mother of 4 kids we were more used to fighthing for attention than getting it normally. I've had to reparent myself, and learn to parent properly to break out of those unhealthy cycles. And I know that you can do this too Annie...

      I know you can let go of your addiction to drama/bad treatment/victim mentality to be treated well, happily, lovingly, amazingly and celebrated for your gifts and contribution, rather than condemned for your attacks and negativity.

      Annie - my request of you is that you comes to the blog with an attitude of learning - when you're open you can allow change in. When you're being right about how wrong everyone is you get attacked - and that reaffirms how unloved and worthless you are.

      On this blog we see you Annie, and we see beyond your bullshit - we hear your cry for help. And ultimately only YOU can help yourself. EVERYONE here comes to learn. Not to be attacked or defend Randy.

      I wonder how you could assist in creating an envirnment of learning here? Or growing?

      I know when people have been taught that their feelings are wrong that it's hard to be vulnerable and attack sustains that stances of courage. One of the most courageous things people can do is to be vulnerable and share "I feel scared, I feel needy, I feel unwanted and undeveloped..." The people can love you for your honesty and authenticity... Rather than you attacking the love you feel jealous of - which pushes it away even more!!!! We all want the best for you... I hope you can let in the gift this is... Loads of love to you Annie...

      1. Natalie,

        See my above comments to Randy.

        Your friend Sean, and I have to really laugh at my silly self now for thinking he was Randy, is very sweet. He did a great job of helping me out of an uncomfortable spot! You are lucky to know two very nice men.

        I use to look every now and then at our conversation on that 2010 post. It was a good conversation, and sometimes I play that Katy Perry song!

        Annie

        1. Annie,

          I'd love you to read this again and again... And hear what you learnt from it rather than dismiss it because it's getting you to reflect at things that may be painful...

          I'd love you to hear the love here for you... and also the VERY strong request that you own your stuff... Yes selfishly for us who love coming here, AND for YOU. hen you'd come home to you - and begin to totally love you as you awaken to all of you!

          Randy is human... When I attack him he defends. It's normal and naturally response.

          When I am needy and demanding it's draining and sticky yuck. No one wants to be around me at those times.

          When I am boldly, openly and gloriously sharing authentically about myself, my challenges and my learnings and asking him what's next for me - and coming to him with a BIG heart, and VERY open mind he'll say (for example) "I find it's good to ask 'what am I holding onto that may be holding me back?'"

          If you want his attention I find I have to DESERVE it. Things that worked for me: Be open. Be receptive. Be willing to learn.

          Sean is ALL of those things. Can he call me day or night for love, friendship, advice, or to share something? Yes - even at 3am. Which is when he tends to call! And he knows that because he comes to me in cherishing that no matter what time he calls EVER in 2 decades I will ALWAYS be kind, loving, and happy to hear from him. Even at 2am!!! Maybe if you chose a knew attitude and came in with an open mind RG would give you insights and attention... right now you don't seem ready, willing or able to receive his goodness....

          And maybe one day soon Annie you'll be willing to let in enough joy to see that RG is a good man, with a good heart who gives daily to you JUST in writing this blog. I wonder if you changed your perspective to thinking "because Randy loves me he writes this blog nearly every day. Aren't I lucky to be loved this much?" And each time you react you could think: "is this NOW I'm reacting too, or the distorted thinking I was programmed into. RG is a loving man, would someone who is loving me write this to hurt me? Would someone with a deep faith and commitment to Greatness want to put me down? How is he challenging me to wake up? What is he asking me to love and heal in myself so I can open to more goodness?"

          1. Natalie,

            I don't know where I should be replying anymore, but this is my last post this evening. Thank you if you are trying to help me, but I just don't want it, not now, maybe never. I mean I don't want this conversation with you, please lets just say goodnight and sweet dreams. This isn't prosperous, and it is probably making Randy nauseated. 🙂 So, Take Care Lady Okay? Have a good rest of the weekend with no worries.

            Annie

  25. Randy,
    Please give some serious consideration to what is occuring in this blog. When you take on leadership, in any capacity, you have a huge responsibility and I am concerned you are creating a very negative vacuum with this. You have very vulnerable people on this blog and if you don't take control and change the temperature, I think you may be doing some serious damage right now. I give you the benefit of the doubt that this is not self entertainment for you or ego driven, but if it is I will delete you in a key stroke.

    1. Yes I was thinking that if I didn't acknowledge some of the personal attacks they might die off, but I can see that isn't happening. I am aware of what you mean and will have to change some things. Thanks, RG

    2. Mary Ellen

      I hear your call for things to be kind, respectful, welcoming, and positive.

      When things get attacking they feel toxic for you and the temperature feels ugly and heated, eh? You're wondering why Randy doesn't leap in and change the atmosphere? Why he doesn't hold the space more so it feels safe and warm?

      I understand that...

      What I see is that he creates a space - where leaders can grow. Where he allows things and hosts a space for us to become leaders... Where he allows people to show up as they are... and be true to ourselves...

      How I've seen Randy work is to lead from the front and go forward... He's not into fixing things... His way of "discipline" is allowing people to see themselves. In the mirror the wake up to what needs changing...

      Rather than EXTERNAL motivation via chastisment, he opens people to see themselves so that when they change personally. They don't change for HIM, they change for themselves. Then the change is real for them. They have come to see who THEY are and they change because they WANT to. They outgrow their unhealthy behaviour because they are compelled from within to become there best.

      It's an intrinstic motivation that he fosters - by being strong, focused, and passionate about his philosophy... He's more like a pide-piper leader singing his tune of prosperity from the front rather than stopping the bickering for his tune to be sung just to one being. He sings and shine and flows...and trust everyone to grow - he believes in their own ability to change rather than fix them.

      I ponder if he knows and trusts that things will unravel, that goodness prevails... And that we are all joyfully growing in the best ways we can.

      Having been a counsellor for nearly 2 decades - I frequently see how clients who are transforming attack and attack and attack personally when they are changing. Their attack is often an indication of the huge transformation that is about to take place. Jung says that it takes a huge amount of aggression at times to break through past programming... So in a way it's exciting to see the anger and upset - it just shows the breakthrough that is about to take place. All that's happening is that the energy is growing for the breakthrough.

      It takes a lot of force and power to slash the shains that binds us. Some people know how to get energy positively, and others only know how to do that with attack. It would be nice if it was kind... eh?

      While it looks like a negative vacuum - I think it's Love getting the energy to see itself! xoxox

  26. Hey there:

    I know it's late on a Friday night, but something that happened tonight got me to see what Randy is talking about, and I thought I'd share about it.

    Some friends of mine were in town (Los Angeles) from Northern Cal., and I went drinking with them out on the West Side. When I got to the bar, I ordered a beer, and we began chatting and having a great time.

    Then, without me even knowing it, someone ordered a round of Jaeger Bombs. Now, I've had enough experience with Jaeger to know that I don't tolerate it well. It's the one type of alcohol that makes me turn into a raging asshole (pardon the language). So, I told them that, and told them I didn't want one. They said, "Don't worry, you were a raging asshole in high school and that's what we love about you." After a bit more peer pressure, I gave in.

    Within about 10 minutes, I was getting upset real easily and started going on rants, not only about outside things, but with the very people I came to have a good time with. When I reminded them that Jaeger Bombs make me a raging asshole, they started trying to make me feel bad about it. One of my friends actually said, "Dom, you don't want me to be the one to end this." So, I said, "OK, I'll end it then." After a few more minutes, someone ordered another round of Jaeger Bombs. I told the waiter I didn't want one, but they ordered it anyway.

    At that point, once the waiter left, I decided I was gonna take off. My friends were really upset. one of them even refused to shake my hand as I left. I went home, got clear of the resentment that I still had, and texted them saying that I was sorry to cut things short, but that I was all good and we'd talk again soon. I got over the resentment quickly and would definitely hang out with them anytime, but I will never sacrifice my own evening for the sake of someone else's good time.

    What I got out of this is that all of us went there to have a good time tonight, but "good time" meant something different to me than it did to them. To them, good time meant that THEY would have a good time by ME making an ass of myself. They had no regard for the fact that I wouldn't have a good time. I gave in initially, thinking that it would be selfish to refuse a drink.

    But finally my healthy selfishness won out. I saw that my enjoyment of the evening was more important to me than sacrificing it so that others might be able to enjoy theirs at my expense.

    Real prosperity for all means that you don't have to sacrifice yourself in order that others may have. Real prosperity means that we can all have what we want, and while we can support each other in achieving our goals, we ought not sacrifice our own goals in order to ensure that anyone else reaches theirs.

    So, while I went tonight with a selfish intention, that I have a good time, it was a a selfish intention that allowed others to have a good time as well. My friends, on the other hand, developed the idea that they could have a better time without regard for whether or not I was OK. They expected me to be willing to sacrifice my good time so that they could have a better time.

    Do you see the two different types of selfishness? One type recognizes that your own happiness is the most important, and that you ought not sacrifice it for anyone else, while the other type desires that others sacrifice their own happiness (or whatever else) for your sake. I think that when Randy talks about selfishness, he's talking about the first type, but because the word is usually associated with the second type, it wasn't well received by some of us with the best of intentions.

    Peace and good night, Dom

  27. Dear Annie - you often speak of how you are almost genetically programmed to help others and yet you seem vehemently opposed to so much of what Randy expouses and you express it in such a violent manner. Being from the emerald isle myself I know irish people are very passionate - which is great if channeled positively but unfortunately uncontrolled passion or intransigence is what caused the "troubles" or the war there which caused so many tragic deaths. (I can feel your blood rise from here.) You are very high spirited and I love your sense of humour but I think you would get a lot more from this blog if you took things less personally. Sometimes I look at the blog and think , is this blog about "Why Doing Good Is Selfish" (in this case) or is it about Annie? As you feel so passionately about things maybe you should start your own blog. I am not asking you to agree with everything Randy says - everyone is entitled to their own opinion(including Randy.) It reminds me of when I brought Mark Victor Hansen to Geneva in 2006 and I had offered a money back guarantee if people didn't like it. The next day 2 young girls called me asking for a refund saying "he had no idea what he was talking about" - the man that sold 120 million books........ and this is just a small fraction of what he is about! You were quite scathing about Randy not defending himself - this is one of the reasons these people are so prolific and why they have The Midas Touch - because they are highly disciplined and know exactly where to put their focus. Personally I am soooo grateful for the inspiration these people bring to my life and I choose to learn from them as I will be elated when I can do as much good in the world as they are doing. In the meantime I choose to love me and my life just as it is.

  28. Natalie and Hilary,

    I don't try to justify my comments, preferring to let them and the discussion they evoke speak for themselves. And when things seem to get off track, it's usually best to let the blog community take care of it and get things back on the right course. In this post I finally felt I needed to say something. Obviously that was a mistake, because you two handled things in a much better and more prosperous way than I did! So thank you for that.

    -RG

    1. Randy, you should have said some things earlier and not necessarily to me.

      I am proud of myself because I have been raw, real, and honest. Not perfect. Not positive always, honest.

      I know some of the people on this blog are business associates of yours and can't afford that kind of let your hair down honesty. However, the way some of them kiss you ass, and conceal nastiness with a smile is unnerving.

      So, you could look at some of the name calling as a good place to stop some of the phony stuff. However, I hope one day myself included we are all real and nice. 🙂

      We should be positive. But, we should also be real with our emotions, always. And learn to say them nicely. Nicely, Annie nicely.

      Annie

      1. Annie - I like that you say one day maybe we are all real and nice. You could ask that with EACH and EVERY post you write eh?

        Why wait for some day? You're great Annie - I bet you could do it every day...

        And the days you are triggered? I don't think you need to be raw, real, and honest in the way you have been if that looks like attacking RG, insulting people, calling him names, distorting what hes saying to prove he's wrong... That's not raw, real and honest for me. That's being distorted, looking at others through a lens that makes them wrong, rather than gains any understanding or growth...

        Raw, real and honest looks like this to me:

        "I feel angry, hurt, and wild when I read what's posted here. I feel victimised and upset. I'm taking it personally and its sore. I don't know why I'm triggered, but something's touched me. I think it's when you use fundamentalist - it hits me, and hurts me. I don't know why I react to that... Maybe I have friends who are fundamentalist and I feel protective of them and I'm like a mama bear. I know they can be weird in their views, but I also love them. I feel like attacking back to hurt you back. I'm breathing to calm myself. I feel confused, and angry... I want to know why you hate them? I feel like you hate me when you hate them. I don't want to be hated. Suddenly as I reread my words I see that I felt hated and attack for having strong views, and felt weird for them. I wanted love and I got judgment instead. I just wanted love. I'm upset now. It hurts. It makes me angry. I feel enraged. I'm going to go and draw my anger, and dance my anger. I'm going to explore the times I felt rejected for being me so that I can love all of me so I feel great again. I know it's not true that YOU are hating me - so I'm going to explore privately what this is about so I can come to see and know myself and my hate and anger so I have more control and power in myself. I want a breakthrough around this, so I feel stronger and more empowered, I hate feeling this triggered and weak... I want to love every little bit of this pain, and hurt and love all of me better. Ow. It hurts. Breathing deeply and wishing you well!"

        I hope this helps... joy to you...and I hope you breath in hope much love there is for you here...

        1. Natalie,

          You know honestly, I was feeling happy until I had read your posts. And now I am angry. I am not you. I will not sound like you when I am upset. I am not sure right now if you really want to help me or if you are trying to help out Randy.

          I have been waving the white flag of reconcillication today. Do you know Natalie, what that suggests? That perhaps I have already without your help considered all these things all ready. I might also add that you mentioned above you haven't been reading my posts anymore so I am not sure why you feel you are at the liberty to say the things you do. You in my opinion, are the one stirring up drama right now.

          I am pretty pissed right now that you keep at me. Are you afraid of letting Randy fight this battle? If so you may want to ask yourself why.

          I am getting tired of you playing therapist with me. So, I am asking you politely to stop. And stop now.

          I don't feel love from you, if you are trying to help only you know, because it is not resonating with me that way right now.

          I have spoken my truth, let it speak for itself. And NOW with kind regards LEAVE ME BE.

          Annie

          1. IT's interesting that when someone DOES reach out to love/help serve you you get angry.... and question the motives...

            And when they DON'T you get angry... and say you are not loved...

            Annie - NEITHER are true. Like Randy says to me - there are times I need to show you how your thinking is distorted and tell you the truth.

            Wayne Dyer says: "When you squeeze an Orange, what comes out? No matter WHO squeezes it, what is IN the orange must come out. Whether it's bitter or sweet or bland, it doesn't matter WHO squeezes it, what is INSIDE it comes out." It seems unloved angry comes out of you...

            By the way there's a difference between a REQUEST, and a command or a demand. This: "So, I am asking you politely to stop. And stop now." is the latter to me.

            I'd love to make my own request: Please respect and honour this blog and it's purpose. It's about prosperity and success. Both of which I'm focused on and I'd love to come here and truly learn from this man who's achieved both with love, integrity, discipline, multitasking mastery and generosity... And co-create magic within the community that touches, inspires, uplifts, and opens the world the gift that it is...

            I'd also like to request you end your attack on RG and use the energy of your anger to break through your own shit rather than blindly attack him. Otherwiwse its a waste of energy that serves no on. It's toxic - and not what I want to be around. If you can't do that please see a therapist until you can. This place isn't where you can wipe your shoes... It's my santuary, not your doormat. If you are going to project, attack and insult on here there are many who can step in to be give you a sense that you're in group therapy so that you get the help you need. You decide - treat the blog with respect, or behave like a victim and receive therputic help here or elsewhere.

            That said, Randy doesn't need my help! I'm not afraid for Randy - I'm being selfish. I'm loving MYSELF and trying to create an atmosphere and space of support and challenge to create a prosperous and successful space here. Is that not what you want?

            What I'd love is to come to this blog and be celebrating and learning about success and prosperity. Wouldn't you? Are you wanting to be prosperous and succesful more than you are already? Is that your purpose here? What energy and atmosphere are you wanting to create her Annie? Is it aligned with the blogs purpose? I expect everyone here to be owning, exploring and using this blog to realise their highest potential in prosperity and success.

            What can we do to create a blog that oozes with prosperity and success Annie? How can you contribute to this to a sacred space of learning, creating, celebrating rather than attacking with negation, frustration and reaction? How can we as a community create an atmosphere that attracts AWESOMENESS, greatness, and cherishes the GIFT that we ALL are?

            Blessing with gratitude... xoxo

          2. Natalie,

            You guessed right I was demanding you to stop. It wasn't meant to be anything other than a command. I am setting a boundry with you. You did not respect it either. Once again, if you have not been reading these posts, I have no idea why you think you are at liberty to say the things you do.

            Please be respectful of my response. I was nice earlier to your long winded psychobabble post, and I no longer feel like being nice to you.

            You are not helping me or you at this point. I will not grant your request you have made, because you have unfairly accused me of things I will not claim to be true in my opinion.

            How dare you. I have treated Randy with disrespect, and it was not right. I wonder if you realize you are now doing the same to me.

            While you cannot tell me what to post to Randy, if you want me to stop responding to you I will. If Randy tells me to stop posting I will.

            If you are hearing what I am saying please, do your best to use restraint in your next comment.

          3. Annie, I boudnary has been set many times with you - and refuse to honour it. Each time you post Randy's words are right above that requesting you ADD to the dialogue - not insult. Randy has requested you use I language and quit attacking. You refuse to honour him. You continue to attack him personally.

            If you continue to attack, I shall know it is because you need support to reflect and question your negative views and behaviour. OR You may choose to behave here with respect, kindness and a willingness to learn and I shall enjoy your contribution with appreciation. YOU decide Annie. It's your choice. COme here to learn with respect and ownership of your feelings without attack OR it will be taken as a clear sign that you do not know how to treat people, and are asking for support to learn how to behave in a kind, respectful and honouring way. You decide.

            If you have to continue with you anger, reactions and upset, I shall reflect your behaviour so you see it clearly, firmly, loving but ensuring you see it. You are welcome to get angry with me for doing that - tho as per Randy's request: without attack, name calling, or insult when I hold the mirror to you... It's up to you Annie. How will you play ball?

            Are you going to come here to learn prosperity and play nicely?

            I dare ya! You know you want to 😉

          4. Annie,

            How you feel has nothing to do with what is being described....and suggested by others...

            This is something totally different, isn't it?

            Victoria

          5. Victoria,

            I am so tired, I don't know anymore. I just want to move on. Thanks.

            Annie

    2. Natalie,

      I refuse to accept what you say as the accurate reflection of who I am or what I say. You are not able to mirror what you cannot see.

      You think you will shame/frighten/guilt me, well I do not accept your vigorous attacks. I think today you have behaved as if perhaps not more disrespectfully than I ever have.

      You are not aware that what you are doing is not loving? Love requires empathy and grace, and when one receives it they can feel it.

      It is interesting how you keep begging me to be nice and not attack, when I responded once to you kindly enough. Yet, you had to keep trying to therapize me or something, I don't really know what your goal is.

      I think there is fine line between tough love and hateful behavior, better check which side your on.

      Annie

      If you want me to behave like you model better behavior.

      1. Annie,

        Loving doesn't mean agreeing with someone or condoning their behaviour. Loving is like today saying to the boys at the back of the church "Be Quiet" - even with the father standing with them ignores their loudness because he's too timid to control his son. Loving is also discipline and showing consequences - if someone can not control their own behaviour and insist on attacking, insulting and being rude and creating a toxic environment there are results to that... It's a choice if someone wants to be included and enjoyed, or be disciplined for behaving rudely in someone elses home/blog.

        Many times Randy teaches us to grow as leaders and says - if there's someone at the back of the room doing something they shouldn't we need to step up and say something. For instance if he's talking he won't stop to ask a mother with a noisy baby to leave the room - he expects one of us will get up and request she leave until the baby has stopped crying. She may get offended, but it disturbs the atmosphere and stops people from being able to focus on what is being said. It's her choice to feel rejected but he teaches that as leaders he expects us to step in, and rise up, and do the right thing. I had this at the last meeting with him - a woman made a phone call on her mobile WHILE the presenter was speaking. SO disrespectful. I went to her and requested she stop. RG expects that we will support him in the crowd and do the right thing. He'll let me know if I'm not doing it right. Very quickly.

        I have NO intention to frighten/shame/make you feel guilty at ALL. My ONLY intention is to ensure that this space is a safe space to explore and realise prosperity, and success. My only intention is to support Randy to have his blog be a place focused on prosperity and success and NOT on attacks, insults, name calling and frustration... I want to have a place to come that is amazing... not a childrens playground with name calling, attacks, spite, biting, and personal insult without self control. This is not a field day for inner children to run amok - this is a blog designed to raise our consciousness. If you don't want that, and you want to disagree with as much as possible why are you here?

        When I woke this morning I the first words I heard where Randys "you do have the liberty to say what's okay." And I remembered how frequently he requests we stand up as leaders rather than allow bad behaviour. So I apologise to RG for just avoiding the comments, rather than stepping up. It was weak of me.

        We have tried requesting you respect this space, understanding your history and loving you through the issues/confusion/challenges you see yourself in that are manifest in this constant reaction, seeing behind it, reflecting who you are being, mirroring your behaviour, showing you how toxic you are being by creating and evoking drama and being a victim, we've tried to problem solve with you to establish a place that is glorious place to grow (safe, warm etc), we've asked your intention here and why you come here... Is there another way that I can help/challenge/request you with your personal attacks so that they STOP, and you come here to learn?

        In each situation when I have asked completely openly WHAT IS YOUR INTENTION and HOW CAN YOU SERVE AND ADD VALUE TO THE BLOG? I have not received an answer - there has only been reaction. COnstantly. Nothing productive, supportive, or focused in aligning with the blog. As one of the people RG mentors I need to step up to support him rather than ignore your posts - so he can focus on his writing, leading a 200 000+ organisation, creating products, etc. to serve many more than just those he mentors. I realise that maybe I have been wrong in simply avoiding what you write. Maybe I should have been asking you to think about your behaviour and make a choice:

        Either you come here with respect. Or you get help with your behaviour that is not acceptable so you can learn what that is appropriate, amazing and respectful. Or you do not post when you feel attacking. Or you leave?

        SO many options. I'd ask you Annie - if this was YOUR blog, would you allow someone like you here to attack the author, the readers, the content, the philosophy, without critical thinking or willingness to stay focused on the issues?

        Loads of love to you Annie! xox

        Randy has said clearly: do not personally attack, speak about the topic NOT the person, discuss issues

        1. Natalie,

          I didn't even read this one. And I won't. As I have said before I don't wish to have this discussion with you. Thanks for your attempts, let's let it go, and read about Hedonism!

          Annie

  29. Selflessness is NOT a prerequisite for valuing and truly helping others! You need a self to act in the world in favor of it. In fact, valuing others deeply will lead inevitably to valuing yourself more. If you keep fighting it, you are in for some very difficult, unproductive times... and you are most likely, not really valuing others, just "helping"...and that seldom helps! Great points as always! 😉

  30. Jesus Christ...what a long conversation.Tried to follow it but realized something like "this is not my business".Randy,have you read a book called "Back from tomorrow"?Maybe I have asked that before.George.G.Ritchie.What I see about Jesus is that he was not on peoples side like that.He did never judge.At least not after baptised into Christ.The christ did not judge,because he was able to see things from every point of view.And sometimes when we meet a peron who strongly has this force,we feel it and by that we can realize things about ourselfes,but not from a judging point.And I see you have that ames.To be able to see things from all sides.I guess that is why people connect to you so easily.

  31. sorry,my post was a bit mixed.I said Jesus Christ first because of the long conversation...and then I answered a comment...and then I started talking about you.Well well,it is sunday and I am on a diet.I guess i am excused...

  32. Incredible insights Randy - right on the mark!

    This reminds of the episode in "Friends" where Phoebe and Joey are having a dispute as to do whether or not Phoebe can do a "selfless" act.

    Basically she tried doing all of these "nice" things, but Joey reminded her that every nice thing she did... she did for selfish reasons (for the happiness it gave her, etc.)

    Anyway, awesome post!

    Jeremy Reeves
    http://www.JeremyReeves.com

  33. Nice manipilation of Mother Theresa's quote.to quote Mother Teresa herself, “To be able to give, you must have.” You know she meant love in the action service. You are funny. Your teachings on prosperity give a different look. But again just a look. So folk take what is useful and leave the rest alone. Randy is just a man with weakness's and strengths like everyone else. Prosperity is our birthright with or without Randy Gage!You gotta respect em though he gets u going and thinking! But he just plays a small world in the unlimited world of wealth doing and thinking!!

  34. Wow, this whole thing - article & comments really disturbed me. Mainly the fact that all of you seem to be attacking people who express an opinion that doesn't tally with Randy's or your own, for daring to express a different view - it's almost as if this is some kind of cult or totalitarian regime where everyone commenting must only express admiration & support for the views of the great, wise leader. Every individual is entitled to their own opinions & views - just because you don't like it or agree with it doesn't give you the right to be unbelievably vile & disrespectful to the person who has expressed this different perspective. And if you really believe everything that is written in this article, and truly feel comfortable with your perspectives on the world & the issue of doing good being 'selfish' then why get so defensive when you come up against opinions & beliefs that challenge your own?! Doesn't make your beliefs wrong & it doesn't make them right either - they just are & you are entitled to have them, but you've also got to respect the views of others & recognize that every individual thinks differently & has different views and beliefs, even if you don't agree with them.

  35. Wow, this whole thing - article & comments really disturbed me. Mainly the fact that all of you seem to be attacking people who express an opinion that doesn't tally with Randy's or your own, for daring to express a different view - it's almost as if this is some kind of cult or totalitarian regime where everyone commenting must only express admiration & support for the views of the great, wise leader. Every individual is entitled to their own opinions & views - just because you don't like it or agree with it doesn't give you the right to be unbelievably vile & disrespectful to the person who has expressed this different perspective. And if you really believe everything that is written in this article, and truly feel comfortable with your perspectives on the world & the issue of doing good being 'selfish' then why get so defensive when you come up against opinions & beliefs that challenge your own?! Doesn't make your beliefs wrong & it doesn't make them right either - they just are & you are entitled to have them, but you've also got to respect the views of others & recognize that every individual thinks differently & has different views and beliefs, even if you don't agree with them.

  36. @concerned1410 expressing opinion is all right. But projecting it on others in the garb of moral good is definitely wicked. why teach others, just go on doing good and set an example. 
    even if you are doing a seemingly good who knows the reason behind your altruism facade. Imagine a wicked person left with innocent children. There is only one sure way to destroy yourself in my opinion and that is accepting any  thing which you have not earned. even in distress accepting more than what you actually need is immoral.
    In my life I have seen lives being destroyed by moral teaching.

  37. @Daryl Mother Theresa's message  “To be able to give, you must have” has a very deep meaning indeed. You cannot play with it. What she meant was earn and then give. Like in all other field there are people in the moral arena too who think themselves very clever. What they do is to urge you to give away all you have earned and they in tern will earn a good name, creditibility and a cut out of what you are giving.
    More than love a person in his/her life needs is dignity. In my opinion if you don not respect somebody you cannot love that person. Love all 
    I do not pay excessive attention to any individual.
    I am concerned with the ideas, concepts and philosophy. These things cannot belong to anybody though they may first seem to get noticed because of some individual's effort or through a discourse between two or more individuals. 
    Humans are fallible . Are not ideas, concept and philosophy fallible too? They need greater caution when being adopted/applied. 
    Therefore my considered opinion is that no amount of "great sayings" around you is going to give you a foolproof way of living your life. Guiding principle for me is - do not get overwhelmed by any thing idea person place, take your time and do what ever keeps you cantered. Clarity of mind is most indispensable.
    Well, by and by you learn. AND ofcourse DISCOURSES are very important. They definitely sharpen your intellect.

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  • 120 comments on “Why Doing Good is Selfish”

    1. Could not have said it better myself :-), and offcause it is provoking to many. But you do not get an argument from me. I agree.
      Love your posts! Thank's.

      Lene

    2. I second Lene, RG, you about covered it all.

      My only add: find yourself before looking out for others, for the main problem in this world are people who are looking out for others yet giving them horrible advice because they didn't tend their own shop.

      Be happy. Do what makes you happy. Teach others how to do it for themselves, without getting attached to any outcome.

      Have a powerful day!

      RB

    3. I just wanted to say... Thank you Randy!. I am loving this discussion... But due to my recent enlightenment this past year on the whole Rothchild / Builderberg Group / Tri Lateral Commission... that the elitists of the world have created the perfect storm for humanity to seek out religion, to be more of a humanitarian, to really focus on everything around them but themselves (ex: saving the earth, which by the way is a ploy to unionize nations as was 911). I believe it is becoming harder for people to accept "being selfish" because they are allowing themselves to be programmed to give all they have for the greater good of the country, and to help thy neighbor. STOP watching the news!!! It's evil!! Schools are rearing sheep these days by taking out anything that has to do with self expression (if you take your child to school, drop them off, and repeatedly do that then you are giving your child to the government to be groomed and trained for the world as they see fit... Take part in your child's life, inspire them to be creative, teach them that being a stand alone individual is OK).. Stand in line, raise your hand to speak, ask permission to use the restroom, etc... History that is taught in school is far from the truth, because its not the whole story.. “Maintain humanity under 500,000,000 in perpetual balance with nature." <~~ I bet this isn't in any school books, this is what they have planned for everyone, so get out of line, put your hand down, speak if you have something to say, and by all means please go use the restroom if you need. If you watch the news and your proud that our country is the worlds savior, and you wish you had more of yourself to give then YOU will be first in line, probably with your hand up requesting permission to speak...

      I know this may be a bit far from where you were going with your posts, but I truly feel that its the root of selfless behavior. Not to mention organized religion.

      If you believe what your Government tells you, and you believe in story books of promise lands then you are the perfect little sheep.

    4. "When the living energy of productive citizens is sucked from them by the parasitic herd, what incentive is there to remain productive? All innovation and development stops and everyone loses."

      I know, I know, you've talked about it in detail in your book. But I don't think your example is vibrationally accurate. Nothing will happen in our lives that we are not vibrationally in alignment with. If you are not worrying about the parasitic herd, and resisting the parasitic herd, and rolling your eyes over the parasitic herd, the parasitic herd will peacefully leave you to lead the life of abundance that you want and deserve.

      1. I have no problems with the herd. I live in my world surrounded by people of the same consciousness. I only point this out as a reality for other to work through.

        -RG

    5. You must've been there awhile - this is quite the post - but it bodes well with the follow-up responses from yesterday.

      An area that I see the values of selfishness improving peoples lives (and my own) is ownership/responsibility of how they are progressing and how their decisions are affecting the outcome. Taking that responsibility (even though people don't feel that you should 'self-blame' how something turned out) allows you to ask yourself the empowering questions - How could I have handled that differently? What did I learn from that? Not destructive, but constructive growth. And, you feel the ownership and control of your life. This gives you the confidence to move forward.

      I'm looking forward to your thoughts on hedonism tomorrow.

      John

    6. "But I did all this for purely selfish reasons. For the happiness it brings me."

      I agree - you are selfish.
      If you donated time, money, etc purely because you get your sense of happiness from doing it (or because you get a tax deduction), how is that any different from the Pharisees that publicly gave their alms to the poor in order to fulfill their need for public praise (pride?). Wrongful intent is the root of selfishness.

      However, if were altruistic you would give of your sustenance regardless of tax benefits, or how it made you feel - simply because you had selfless concern for others.

      To me it seems your last several posts are encouraging people to adopt a What's In It For Me attitude; i.e. if I don't get something out of it, there's no sense in doing.

      I think you need to refine your definition of selfishness - it connotes a disregard for others. I don't think your intent of these past articles is to foster a disregard for others. Is it?

      1. As you can see above, many of those things I do have no tax deduction. I do those things because they bring me joy. I certainly wouldn't experience that joy if I had a disregard for others. I would just keep those resources and time for myself. I do those things because I have a high regard for others and genuinely like to help when it meets the criteria I described above.

        -RG

    7. Difficult post for me.....I'm right now between a rock and a hard place...because of years ago (about 20) and down, of trying to *help* a wayward (boy was he wayward) teen to do better and stay out of trouble....now have 4 grandchildren from him.....he's been to prison 3 x finally got him *out of our lives* for 5 years. DD because of even lower self esteem, brought him back INTO our lives...changed>>>>hahahahah.....and now he's causing us all **** can't get him out and we have 3 teens that want nothing to do with him,,and a 9 yr old trying to protect, and the courts * think* a bad dad is better than no dad.....little do they know....so all because I was trying to do something *good*...........NOW I understand and find your post very very good. I have *helped* the same dd with the gkids for years, love that, but do feel put on....she brought him back because all SHE wants is her own life....and yes I feel used by her and unappreciated...... all this drama to say,
      Right on Randy. I'm not for selfish, but I do see the need for putting my interest first. I have 0....but I'm learning. I am on the verge of losing a self made business because all I'm trying to do is protect my gkids...from senseless parents....realizing after reading this....hm she got it FROM me....
      So right you are, IF I had helped out of the right way, that would have been ok, but I helped out of my own need...to be wanted by someone, to make a difference in someone's life, and in doing so have nearly ruined our lives!!!!!!!!!
      This was a hard post, because I was always taught to help others....only I didn't secure myself first. I'm a late learner, but getting there. Thanks, Randy

      1. I enjoyed reading your post, anonymous. I have 3 children--youngest is 17 and oldest is 37--and each of them brought home a "troubled" friend. The results of my helping their friends were not as dramatic or life changing as you describe, but I certainly can empathize with the initial response to be there for them.

        I have strong boundaries, though, having come through problems of my own, so I established limits. This last time (with the youngest) I just said no. Most of the time, interventions that I could offer would have only put off the inevitable, which is that THEY needed to deal with their own problems, or deal with the consequences of their actions.

    8. Hi Randy!

      LOVE YOUR POST!!!!!!

      Self-sacrifice seems to be THE weapon of altruists. And the word LOVE, seems to mask their discontent and hatred....

      What possible pleasure can they derive from giving up something of a greater value for a lesser value, or no value at all...?

      Do they even understand that Altruism is not kindness and respect for the rights of others, but a sacrifice of individual rights for the rights of others....

      This PROSPERITY Blog CLEARLY explains the harmful effects of neediness and dependency... Yet, Altruists blindly demand that neediness and dependency must be embraced and nurtured...

      - Agree with me....-they scream in total desperation....
      - Agree with me that self-confidence, self-esteem, reason, intelligence, ability and merit must be destroyed.... WOW!

      - Love blindly, they proclaim...
      - Love is blind..., So...embrace self-inflicted pain, self-inflicted loss and mutual resentment...and call them benefits of an unhealthy relationship....

      - Live for the "Greater good..."...Don't ask: At whose expense?

      - Give us "Free Healthcare..."...Who cares at whose expense....

      Declare that Capitalism does not exist, while typing comments to these posts on machines created by Capitalists....

      Oh....almost forgot....let's also use altruistic tool of fear..."Pray you never really need anyone Big Guy"....

      WOW!!!

      Now...there is the TRUE FACE of an Altruist!...Love those who suffer and despise those who prosper...

      I Love my Selfish
      Me, myself and I,
      Victoria

            1. Elton John is with me babe. He wouldn't want any part of that mess. You do realize you would be hard pressed to find many artistic intellectual leftists types to agree with what you espouse.

      1. "Altruism is not kindness and respect for the rights of others, but a sacrifice of individual rights for the rights of others…."

        I am not sure you understand the definition of altruism.

        How is having "selfless concern for the welfare of others" sacrificing individual rights? Do I not have a right to have concern for others that has no personal or hidden motivation?

        I consider myself to be altruistic but I certainly DO NOT "blindly demand that neediness and dependency must be embraced and nurtured…". Quite the contrary.

        1. DC,

          Of course you have a right "to have concern for others that has no personal or hidden motivation..." - I had the same right in Soviet Union...

          But now, that I am living in Costitutional Republic, do you think that I have a right to experience feelings of happiness when and if I choose to give, therefore have personal or hidden motives?

          Also, as I was born and lived in HELL on Earth under the Altruistic Communist regime, do you really think that I do not understand ALTRUISM?

          Really?

          Please...challenge me!!!!

          Victoria

          1. Sorry you had to live in Hell Victoria, seriously, I realize we are not on the same page about certain things, but I know that was horrible.

            Truly though nothing those bastards did was Altruistic. Communists there misused the term.

            I feel for you truly, and I am glad you get to live here now. 🙂

            And really, sometimes I say things to be funny, I know it was not funny to you.

            Annie

          2. Thanks for this post Victoria. And you seem to know more about United States of America than most because you refered to a "constitutional republic" and not a "democracy" as most citizens do. I assume that you also know there is a differece in the two. Have a couple of former USSR citizens as friends who speak very similar message as you. Thank you again.

    9. I think it would be best if I practice silence on this one. Two ears and one mouth exercise. If this blog has not caught on fire or vaporized from the heated conversations, I'll return.

    10. I once sent a letter to the daily paper after Mother's Day that went like this...
      I think I'll stick a fork in my forehead the next time I read another one of those "oh we can't have it all" diatribes...
      I have a suggestion for the Sun for father's day, why not have a bunch of father's moaning oh we can't have it all, what insensitive clods their wives are and how unfair life is and see the thrilled response you get from your female readers...
      I mean what do you expect you are getting when you decide to get married and have a child??? A maid and a gold fish???
      I read it to my ex and I could hear her smirking down the line, you're happy huh... I said not a question of being happy, question of making a point... I have the greatest respect for you, you did a great job raising your daughters and you did it without a word of complaint...
      My point being, you make your choices, don't complain....

    11. Randy
      You have made the simple act of giving sound like a chore. I am afraid that if everyone adopted this track of thinking . . . this world would be "void of good". I raise my children to view and accept people for who they are . . . regardless of how fragile and needy. I know my children will make a difference in this world because they are "full of good".

      I am sure that the financial support that you provide to all of the worthy causes you mention above is appreciated. But I wonder if you offered your time and wisdom if it wouldn't be more beneficial? I believe that giving needs to have a "'human" side". Thankfully - there are lots of folks out there that believe on sacrificial giving.

      Maybe you are right . . . the world would be better off with fewer people who want to serve and give of themselves . . . but I for one - am glad that the group won't include me or my children.

        1. Randy, these people have no idea what it takes to get where you've been. After 3 years, I'm slowly gaining an idea, and appreciate your accomplishments that much more.

          Kudos to you for all that you've done, and all the knowledge, mentoring and such you've given away FOR FREE, and all that you continue to do. I know you need no defense, but people who haven't busted their ass for free, for years, giving of their time and energy, and not getting the universe's nod in a financial sense until a few years after, have no clue in hell how much others give before they gain immense wealth on the physical plane.....but I sure do 😉 Keep being selfish, please, the world is better for it!!

          1. Amen to that. Funny how they react tho when you do finally start reaping the rewards of all the hard work (and can therefore be in a position to help more people if you choose). They always say "oh you're so lucky" or "it's easy for you". Yeah right.

        2. You don't see that just writing this blog - and his other blog - is giving time to others - nearly daily he writes serving the masses!!!

          Trust me - for years Randy has given LOADS of horus of love, support, and wisdom to so many areas of my life.

          He's one of the most glorious men I've known. He gifts his humour to light up my days, his focus, his lazer eyes to see through confusion, ... and on and on...

          Whether it's in areas he'd make money from or not - he gives and gives. And he jokes that he's probably never made more than $3 from me... His heart overflows...

          I'm truly grateful (in my weird and wonderful way)

      1. Giving with sacrifice in mind, is no giving at all - but truly a form of taking.

        When you're selfish enough to first give to yourself, then you have an abundance to give to others - that form of giving is then truly a joy because it is NOT from sacrifice, but from love.

        And the reward then is one more priceless than what is given away - because it is joy selfishly devoured, with no guilt nor expectations of any reciprocation. So hence, you are giving for selfish reasons - which is the only real reason why we do anything anyway.

        We are all selfish, and being selfish actually makes us happier - if the true value of being selfish is actually understood & respected. It is the most honorable way to be, because it's honest & it's true when we do only what brings our soul the highest joys. Someone who can't be selfish can't possibly know what's good for others, first they have to know how to be good to themselves aka know how to be selfish.

        I echo Natalie because I have the blessedness of knowing this amazing man personally - he is the most giving person in all forms of that word possible. And he is that way because he truly understands the value of being selfish. Without him looking after his good whenever he started that journey decades ago, we won't have him as a blessing today.

        So, my point is think a little deeper about what his message is trying to convey - it's an amazing breakthrough for personal happiness. I stand witness of this myself. Blessings & love your way.

        PS: hey rocksta, I love you because loving you and knowing that you walk this earth brings me joy & immense happiness. I really get this about love. 🙂 TQ for being you & blazing the path to truth, empowerment, and spirituality. XOXO

    12. Love it!! Intotally inderstand what you are saying. And I love all your affirmations you post on Facebook.

      Thank you

      Toby brand

    13. What exactly are you trying to justify? Your possessions? Your relationships? Your goodness? You Randy? You?

      You don't have to justify any of those things. But, you do need to be careful of what beliefs you indoctrinate people with.

      This is not my blog, it is not me or anyone else people come to read, it is you. You. You alone are responsible for what you write.

      It is wrong of me to try to guilt you into another belief, sorry. I actually don't want you to believe differently, I just want you to realize that some of us including me are coming from a place of vulnerability emotionally. I don't want to be told to become a Libertarian or a moral objectivist.

      I do, it is true, want to be more independent. And I know for sure I don't want to be called crazy anymore! You big JERK!!! (I have a right to that one today!)

      My offended nature does not come from your being prosperous. It comes from your deleterious comments about those who are not. And your comments about those who would gladly sacrafice themselves for others.

      I see why you do it. I am sure it sells. But is it right? Is right to speak the way you do and call yourself a prosperity expert? I don't know anymore. I don't care anymore about your values, or what you personally value in others. Just play nice, it's your blog after all.

      You are right about many things Randy, and you are right about me in a lot of ways. If we destroy each other for different opinions will the world be a better place?

      It is nice that you took your friend to the dentist. I'm sure you are very good friend and lover. I think there will be plenty of people around when you need help, Big Guy, I'm still going to call you that, if it's okay with you.

      I do think we can believe different things and we can both be sane and prosperous. What do you think? Maybe? Huh? Maybe? Okay, you think about it.

      1. PS What does a woman stuffing her mouth with chocolates have to do with the price of tea in China? Although I look that way sometimes. 🙂

        I am so selfish when it comes to chocolates. I don't care who you are, your not getting my chocolates. Ghandi, Mother Theresa, Randy Gage it doesn't matter, get your own!

      2. Annie,

        Why are you on the Blog of PROSPERITY?

        You do not understand Prosperity, and what is required to be prosperous...

        You do not understand history, as well as the fact that history repeats itself...

        You do not understand Capitalism, yet you enjoy everything Capitalists have to offer...

        You do not understand Communism, Socialism and Dictatorship, and take the FREEDOM that you have for granted...

        You do not understand that Altruism was the ONLY weapon of Communism (and no...Communists knew exactly what it meant...). Presently Altruism is the weapon of Socialism...

        And the irony of it all is - not only do you not understand but you do not want to understand...

        You are writing the most insulting posts aimed directly at Randy...
        Later you apologize....And then you do it all over again...and again...and again......

        You do undertand that you do not have to agree with anything writen on the Blog of PROSPERITY....Right?

        And you do understand that your participation is of free will....Right?

        Yet, you are writing that no one will make you believe in Randy's philosophy....

        Annie, you are not a child, you are an adult woman...I am sure that in your lifetime you experienced and learned many things that have value to others. By sharing your experiences you maybe able to help others to overcome their problems....You have a great advantage over me...For instance, I can not relate to many people because I have not experienced things as you have...Your experiences and how you dealt with certain problems can change someone's life for the better...

        Also, if you want to be undertood, then present a valid argument based on information that you know to be a fact...

        Stop bashing one person whose purpose in life is to help others to be the best they can be....

        Yes, Randy is a Capitalist. And it is the Capital that makes the world go round..., not neediness and despair...

        So before you write a nasty reply to this post, think first....
        Think very hard about things you have in your life...the material things...., such as your computer..., the magic of internet and cell phones..., the chair that you're sitting on..., your clothing..., the products that you use to beautify yourself..., feminine products..., the car that you own..., refrigerator and food inside of it...., the stove..., utensils..., books that you have..., pen that you write with..., etc..., etc...

        ALL OF IT WAS and IS CREATED BY CAPITALISTS...those that you despise so...

        Now...now....don't hate just yet....

        Imagine that all of it is gone...

        Imagine going to the store and there is no food, or what's left is stuff that you don't need...

        Imagine going to a car dealership and there are no cars....and the waiting period is 10 years....

        Imagine that your computer broke and you can't find another for sale....Better yet, say your computer is in tact, but you can't get on line...

        Can you imagine that?

        What it would mean is that Capitalists are gone, and when they go they take with them ambition, drive, intellect, innovation and prosperity....

        No more Prosperity Blog...., no more Randy....

        No one is screaming that the rich should give to the poor...., because now everyone is equally poor....

        Is that what you want?

        Once again...., put your emotions on hold....and attempt to use rational thinking....

        Give me a lucid argument (if you want), I believe you can...

        Victoria

        1. No, I don't know how to do it, I guess. I am more emotional than rational.

          Yeah, I have been childish, I will take that critical claim to heart.

          Annie

          1. You, that know Randy and love him, are in my opinion not the most loving of people. So, at this point in the conversation, I think I am happier to be known as his opponent or enemy. Because, I haven't seen empathy, or real kindness from many,but not all of those who love Randy and follow his message. So honestly, maybe you all are getting richer and physically prettier, your hearts seem hard.

            So, I will follow another leader, and hope that instead of using Randy as a path to interpersonal relationships and a teacher of love you will find someone better. In my opinion he has done particularly you Jamie no favors. Your comment was mean spirited towards me.

            I don't usually get mean and nasty with any one but Randy, because he is the leader of this blog and he should be able to take the heat. I am not saying I am right in doing so. If you are trying to prove how lucky you are to know him and that you know real love because of it, you wouldn't have written such a comment. That is not love. That is not light. It is mean and nasty. Not saying that I haven't been. But really. Really go F... yourself.

            Oh yes, with LOVE AND LIGHT,
            Annie

            1. One more thing Jamie, if he was so Great, why does his friends have to keep defending his honor. It should be apparent. It isn't.

            2. Sigh. Annie. Take a chill pill.

              Firstly, my comment has nothing to do with you. I like Victoria’s writing style – it’s very poetic.

              Secondly, here's the truth. I’ve stopped reading your rants for months now. I see your name, and then these long, long, posts – and, I scroll right past them. Because I detest the way you use words so lightly and try to push the buttons of someone you have no idea whom it is. Your posts do not add to my day, they take from it. So since Randy has the grace of still leaving you to rant on his blog like a demented child on Prozac, I respect his decision – but choose not to read/ understand you anymore. If it’s my blog – I would have canned your ass months ago. But it’s not.

              Thirdly, I can be a real bitch but I realized some time back that I also have the power of choice - the choice to add to people’s lives or take from it with every single action and word. And I am of the belief that what I choose to say is a reflection of me, not the person it’s intended to. So I THINK before I speak/ write – and yes, I am thinking when I’m writing this reply to you.

              So - I am not interested to hurt you, for I am not hurt myself anymore; and you seem already terribly wounded. I have no idea why, and I probably can emphatize if I knew your story, but I’m not in the game to buy your stories or help you justify why it's ok to tell other people to f**k themselves on their own blog in so many different ways, over so many different posts – every other day. We all have our stories, it's never OK to lash out at someone else. As for you telling me to f**k myself, I take no offense personally & you're forgiven.

              Lastly, why we defend Randy is not that he needs defending – but because he has too much class & grace to get into a bitchy nonsensical cat fight with you that’s gonna lead nowhere. So when we can’t stand it anymore, we speak up out of our own personal annoyance with your incessant need to attack him AND contaminate this space where we come to for inspiration. So it's not about protecting him, it's about protecting the space.

              Also, while I am totally clear too that this conversation may lead nowhere with you – I choose to respond to you today because I hope that you understand that (1) I am not interested in attacking you & (2) that you can’t get love without understanding you first have to love yourself. And that shows. In every sentence you write. I gave up on sarcasm b/c it's totally lack – so truly, am sending you love & light, because love heals all & I am hoping you will allow it to heal you too.

              PS: You will recognize honor when you choose to be honorable.

            3. Perhaps one day I will forgive your unkindness, lies, and ignorance. But, not today. When that day comes I will truly wish you love and light.

              Annie

            4. Jamie,

              I'm over it. Sorry, if I truly did misunderstand you. I hope you do read my posts sometimes. I say some good stuff sometimes.

              I read yours, because sometimes they make me laugh.

              Annie

            5. Annie

              MAny years ago a mentor said to me that I was needy and that he hated being around me - I thought he was an arsehole. Actually I see he was being kind, generous, and very helpful.

              Many people may have listened to my woes, loved me, cared for me - NONE of that niceness made me change.

              It was HIS comment that got me thinking about who I was and how I came across. It was the most selfless comment of the lot. He didn't care if I liked him or not, but he knew that I needed a home truth to change me.

              You may think I'm lovely, kind, sweet, and that Sean is a sweetie pie... Actually we probably have not served you as much as Jamie.

              I'll give you a little context about Jamie - I've stayed with her and her dad for a few days (even tho I had never met her before - she kindly welcomed me in). She stayed up late into the night with me giving me insights. She's held my hand at an event where I knew one person. When I looked into this strangers eyes she breathed me in. And she oozed liquid love out of every cell. She did that because she's a kind hearted gorgeous woman, AND she's a remarkable leader that touches and changes people's lives - and now I can see why and how after her post to you. She doesn't waste time being nice - she serves in being real and true.

              It takes both challenge and support to change. Jamie may feel harsh here - and she speaks wisely. She's hitting a home truth Annie, I think you're strong enough to hear it and use it as the ball to coming running home to the greatest Annie you can be. It's an exciting time for you Annie - to stop being that child and become the leader you can be that inspires rather than kills people off.

              Just so you know, I too have stopped reading comments here because I commited to myself that I would have a drama free year. No issues and just having a magic year. Letting go of relationships, beliefs, habits, things that do not hold me high in joy and greatness. You bring drama into most days here so I had to let go reading this blog too. I read Randy's words, tho ignore the comments. I'm committed to creating value where people want it. You want to argue. I want to make a difference.

              Maybe you'll hear Jamie's words, and ask yourself how they might be true? How might they serve you to become your greatest? Ask yourself: who can I be to make a diiference in a positive way that doesn't put others down? How can I be my highest self that leaves me happy, joyous, free and thrilled to be me?

            6. Annie,

              No sorry's/ justifications are necessary. It's done & over. You deserve to know the truth of how you are coming across so you can make some different choices, if you choose to. Someone gave me that choice a long time ago & started me on my path to personal mastery.

              There's only one solution towards healing if you would care to take it: Forgive & love yourself. Everyone deserves unlimited chances, but only you can give that to yourself. Not Randy, not this blog, not anyone else. Just you. You are enough as you are now, and have always been. When you get that, you won't feel threatened by diversity, you won't need approval/ attention from anyone, and you would never think that anyone is out to attack you. It's a good place to be. You deserve to be there.

              Natalie - Love you too sista. Keep glowing! <3

    14. It's taken me 53 years to understand and believe most of what you've said here, Randy, and I was in misery (self-induced) most of that time. Thankful that I'm finally starting to "get it" - and to live fully. Thanks for your wisdom!

    15. Let me see if I have this straight. If I have not met my own needs and figured out what makes me feel happy healthy and whole inside my own head and in my skin I simply can not hope to do the same for another. In that I must be "self"-ish. I must look to my "Self". Are the needs of my "Self" being met? Lots of people have quoted scriptures and famous philanthropists in their outrage at the thought of being called "selfish" Yet Jesus clearly stated when asked which of the commandments (that being the 10 Commandments) was greatest. He said the greatest commandment was to love God (by whatever name you call Him/Her) with all of our heart soul and strength. The second commandment he said was like the first "Love your neighbor as much as you love yourself." Well, if you were to look at that second commandment logically then you would HAVE to love yourself first before you can love your neighbor. That states pretty clearly to me that I have to be taking care of myself (being self-ish) before I can take care of the guy next door. I say be a rebel and learn to love yourself enough to be capable of loving your neighbor.

    16. "In a healthy relationship, you choose the person you love, and you fall in love with them because they bring happiness to your life. This is the highest compliment and honor you can ever pay another human being – that you love them for the selfish reason of the happiness and joy they bring you."

      I like 🙂

    17. I have cried over this post. I really don't like personal arguments and yeah, I suppose I started it. I don't like the idea of one set of people being right and good, and the other set being a herd or wrong and bad.

      And, although I called Randy everything but I child of God, I don't want anyone to think he is bad either. I think Randy has a lot of good to offer and does. No matter what I or anyone says. To need this blog for soothing egos and justification is really kinda crazy too Randy. You should not have to justify yourself. If you are happy, who cares?

      I believe we can all have different political views and learn from one another. That is what we are really fighting about. Whether or not one person is totally right and sane or if another is totally wrong and bad? It is not the truth on either side.

      I agree that no sane person would say you shouldn't love yourself and take care of yourself. That would be crazy. Yes people do it. But, we are all different. Some people give and give and don't take care of themselves and they get tired and yes probably a little crazy. Personality is a factor though. Some people find pure joy in giving without the expection of some external reward, so therefore they are still finding joy. Some people give away that which benefits them in an Altruistic manner because they put the greater good over their own best interest. Does not mean all who do are crazy. Should anyone feel forced to do that or guilty if they don't no.

      The "Greater Good" is not dangerous, unless misinterpreted and misused as a form of control. Now, I know it sounds like I am making an argument for no taxes and no having to be forced by the government to take care of others. I AM NOT.

      I believe that by definition a democracy is the people's will for the most part. No, it doesn't always happen that way, but it should. We vote in America, sometimes the person you want wins and sometimes they don't. But, majority has the say, that is a democracy, what most people think is best goes. Right or Wrong it goes. How else do you do it with so many people? Totalitarian Rule? One Person decides? Anarchy, everybody doing whatever they want? That would get confusing, if we didn't all agree. If we all agree I suppose Anarchy would work. But we are individuals and that's why Democracy works, because we all have different ideas. Thank God for that. I think that way we achieve balance. Because you know what no belief is all right or all wrong usually, we find the wholeness and truth by putting disparate parts together.

      I believe that it is for the "greater good" to have Universal Health Care, even though there will problems with it and some will get free cheese while others flip the bill. Because for me it is brutal the thought of people not being able to get health care when their lives are at stake. I see it as mass murder really.

      If America was truly a Capitalist paradise where everyone could truly do all the things Randy said, then yes it would be wrong. But America's Capitalism while having many wonderful strengths has been weakened by self intererested behavior like slavery and holocaust. Equality has not been achieved yet, it has been spoiled by all of us. Americans have been many good things, but we have also been greedy and prejudiced and evil.

      We have to remedy first inequality, because right now not everyone truly has the opportunity to become prosperous. They can perhaps in the future, but first we all need to agree on giving away our incomes to help people become healthy and able through health care and education. Yes, by teaching them to fish, but first before you can teach a person to fish they must be fit enough to throw out the net.

      Anyway, I think if we have equal opportunites and healthy well educated people, we can eventually have pure democracy and capitalism. I hope it happens.

      I understand the frustration of not agreeing with the government or not bein aligned with the ruling party. But, I know for better or worse we ordered it some way. And if what we ordered turns out wrong hopefully we can fix it.

      Democracy is also flailing in America. We are Propagandized and pushed around sometimes by a few in power when truly in a Democracy we should feel our voice counts. I hope we all work to keep democracy safe by not buying into propaganda on either side of the political lines.

      I believe to that when it comes to health care if we all heard the real truth we would agree to give and help our fellow humans, because in the long run or the short run it will help us all. I hope too if it happens and those who don't agree with it will realize that perhaps the majority of the people believed it was the best thing for now, and democracy worked.

      Randy I don't agree with churches telling me what to do and believe pollitically anymore than I agree with you doing it. You see on your blog you are in a position of power. Most see you as a mentor and teacher, just as flocks of parishs see the priest as their teacher. You are not guilty of being unkind or uncharitable or unfriendly. What I accused you of was an abuse of power.

      You abuse your power when manipulating those who come to you for personal help growth, and you tell them they should believe in certain political or philosophical stances in order to have what you have. Which is a lot of money and influence. Everybody wants that. It is no better than my priest telling me to vote against stem cell research. You get it? The priest is telling us if we want to be good we have to vote the way the church wants us to. That is what you are doing and it is wrong. You are saying if you want to be prosperous and happy you must be a Libertarian or a moral objectivist. Just as there are many roads to Heaven there are many roads to prosperity.

      If you say self love is the only road to happiness you are correct. But that is not exactly all you have said is it?

      1. Annie,

        Okay, you want a Universal Health Care.....

        So...., are you willing to pay 60%-70% of your gross pay for "free" health care?

        Also, are you willing to wait six months for an operation, hence there will be shortage of doctors and nurses...?

        Any idea as to why Canadians come to United States for health care....?

        Any idea why Canada will let you live there if you're a doctor or a nurse?

        Do the research and come back with facts....NOTHING IS FREE.....NOTHING!

        Victoria

        1. I know Victoria, I am sure there is truth to what you are saying. But, I just have to respectfully disagree. I see health care as a right to every individual.

          We pay so much for health insurance, I don't think we would even notice the difference in income, if it truly does end up being that large of a precentage. If it is, 60-70% Dear God help us! Whew, that would be terrible.

          Americans go to Canada too, for health care. There are flaws in both ways. I hope there will always be people like you around to bring balance. And if people have to wait that long for operations, I will be crying fowl with you.

          I like your passion Victoria even if we don't agree.

          Annie

        2. You know why I like this blog Victoria? Because I need it. It brings me balance. I need to be less needy and less giving what I haven't got. But, I still hold to certain principles.

          Annie

          Peace? I'm waving my little white flag, can you see it? 🙂

          1. Annie,

            Of course, peace and love only....:)

            And I respect your principles....:)

            It is your delivery that in most cases is confusing....

            I found the following in one of the books that I am reading:

            "Love must be learned,

            and learned again and again;

            there is no end to it.

            Hate needs no instruction,

            but wants only to be provoked."

            -Katherine Anne Porter

            Victoria

        3. Victoria-

          There are no easy answers around health care. The fact is we, as tax payers, already pay an incredible amount covering the uninsured who wait until a problem is acute and then go to an emergency room for treatment. In the western state that I live in (not California), there is compelling evidence that shows that universal coverage will be actually be less costly than what we spend now (including state money through our taxes that cover the uninsured). I won't pretend to have the answers but something has to change.

    18. I got sloppy with my commas, I hope everyone understands where the commas go, and understand what I say.

      Randy, you are brave to leave your blog open to comments of any kind. It is also really brave to join the discussion, especially when it is not all positive towards you. You got guts Big Guy, I will give you that. 🙂 You never said I couldn't call you Big Guy anymore.

    19. I keep thinking, maybe I should stop. Or stop writing, one or the other. Anyhow, "the greater good" is a powerful one and dangerous. It is dangerous in that, everyday soldiers die for the "greater good". Are they crazy? Are they crazy because they put their beliefs or cause above themselves? I don't know? I am humbled and in awe of their sacrafices. They do it to protect a cause they believe in, something they see as greater than even themselves.

      I guess I would have to say when it is for truly good honorable puproses to put yourself in harms way for another, you are truly being heroic. We have this blog and other things in America like freedom of speech because of the Altruistic Heroes that came before us. Some died for a belief that they felt would benefit everyone in the long run.

      Most parents would tell you they would gladly put themselves in harms away for their children. Is is right? You have to ask yourself that.

      Activists go to prison, like Vaclav Havel and Martin Luther King Jr. for their activism and beliefs. That is an Altruistic act. They put their belief in the Good of All before their own comfort and safety. Are they crazy? Once again, I am sure there will be varying opinions.

      Victoria- Altruists put their belief that communism was evil and detrimental to their country, before, their own self interest, in order to get rid of it, for the "greater good". BTY, My first real love came from a communtist country, and he loved me even though I was a "tree hugger", that's what he called us left wingers. 🙂 One thing we had in common though was our love of Vaclav Havel.

    20. I began reading a lot of new age books several years ago and the idea of being selfless was always being imposed.

      I did the selfless life for a while and it doesn't work. it left me drained, broke, and hopeless.

      I was born selfish and I will die selfish. Thanks Randy...

      P.S. My website takes donations. Thanks in advance.

    21. Randy,what about Jesus?Is he the ideal human being for you?What role does Christ have in your life?Just curious

        1. You know the curious thing about your position on Christ is mostly that you dislike the Christian Fundamentalists.

          Randy you are a fundamentalist. Not a Christian fundamentalist, but right wing, Libertarian fundamentalist. Look at how many of your beliefs are fundamental. I am sure will not see but, I do.

          I still believe you hold Christian values. But are you sure you have interpreted them correctly. Christ was not a fundamentalist, many of his thoughts and practices were paradoxical.

          Ask yourself, would Christ be for or against universal health care? If you could just sit and talk with him, imagine. Christ, not the church, not religion. Jesus the philosopher and teacher. Pretend you have a one on one class together. We still don't have to agree, but I bet you will find an incongruency there. If you don't fine. Maybe Jesus would agree with you. But maybe not.

          Randy you are good guy, Iv'e been bad mostly, not you. I need to revisit the self discipline posts. 🙂

          1. Annie,

            I read your posts on "Jesus" blog...., you were great!!!

            Talking about logic....you have it!!!

            Victoria

            1. Victoria, We did a fine job arguing together and I consider you friend, whether we agree on everthing or not. I like it better when we agree though! 🙂

              Annie

            2. Annie,

              Like I wrote before...,

              You are a smart cookie!

              And it also takes one with passion to recongnize the passion of the other...
              ....Therefore, friends we are!

              But don't think that I wont's bite back....And do expect you to do the same....preferably without emotions 🙂

              But in case..., I'll be wearing my Russian armor 🙂

              Agreeing is okay..., but learning most of the time takes divergence....

              All is well!
              Love and light to you... (and I always mean it..., sarcasm is not my thing).

              Victoria

          2. He would've shown you that you don't need to have health care coverage as health is a natural state and is allowed to emerge from within.

        2. Randy,

          I just read the "Jesus" blog....

          If you survived that one..., you can and will endure anything....!!!

          YOU ARE BEST!!!!!

          Victoria

    22. I just finished getting my home off-grid and buying my first electric car is next. The day I allow Randy to dictated if I am worthy because of how much things I have,that's the day I gave up my rational thinking.
      Anyone that doesn't think like you is part of the herd.
      A nurse is part of the herd because she doesn't have passive income.
      Your softballs friends are losers because they are not millionaries
      the counselor that help break your negative pattern is a loser.
      the doctor that saved your life when you were shot.
      Just irrational beliefs because you know how to make money passively.
      Why haven't you manifested a private jet? Maybe,because it is not important to you.
      Why would I want to travel around the world and not see my daughter?so I can more money. Different values.
      You are part of the herd because you believe your thoughts--as though your thoughts are the ultimate reality.
      Have you ever question what is beyond beliefs (a bunch of thoughts)?

      1. At first, I felt kinda bad for Randy when I read this. Now all I have to say is GO ENRIQUE! And on a personal note do you think we should just get away from reading this material?

        Annie

    23. I won't add much here because I came in a bit late in the discussion(was on a selfish vacation - which I also treated my kids to!) - and there have been some great comments here already, but ...

      I used to be this kind of crazy ... in fact I was the 'saver of the world' for about 47 years - and it really never got me or (more importantly) the people I wanted to serve/save to a better place.

      Not to prosperity.
      Not to health.
      Not to peace.

      It simply just fueled the cycle of broken/need to be fixed - broken worse/need to be fixed more.

      It wasn't until about a year ago that I finally decided that helping others at the delay of taking care of MYSELF was not working!!! What was amazing was that once I began to become 'self-ful' (putting myself at the top of my own list and taking care of my needs so others wouldn't have to) that many of those around me whom I was so busy 'helping' before sat up and took notice.

      When I started caring for my own health - suddenly, my kids wanted to eat the good stuff I was! Once I got my act together, my friends quit feeling sorry for themselves and began asking me what I was doing differently so that they could get their own lives on track.

      Well ... either that or they simply slipped away and latched onto others who would still indulge their 'stuckness'. 🙂

      This is a simple, but fierce world we live and play in. There are prizes as big as your mind and heart can imagine, but you have to have the guts, the spirit and the discipline to go after what you want. No one else is going to do it for you. The best part is,when you start to reap the rewards, it feels AMAZING to be able to share that with others from a place of abundance, not because your identity of 'world's greatest giver' needs polishing!

      Take care of yourself first, not instead, of others - this alone will transform the planet!

      K

      1. Yes no one can disagree with that philosophy. No hidden agenda. Good for you, Kimbralee.

        People need to hear that, not that they are crazy, for certain beliefs. And yes, yes you are talking about the unhealthy side of feeling that one must save the world. You are not calling people who do good selfless acts lunatics.

        However, our holy mentor has run amuck, and gone political and not to mention been just plain mean spirited.

    24. Randy, you sir are in no way a person who should be mentoring anyone in personal growth. You should be able to stand up to my attacks and defend my right to be different. You won't.

      You will tell me, I have no right to make personality comments, then you do to it to me and let others. I did attack you, but in some ways I think we can agree that is different, it is your site and you can edit comments you want.

      You are not a happy and prosperous person, you are mean spirited. I am sorry I had any faith in you at all. I did want to learn from you. Now, I don't know. How can you pass off what you have done here as helpful?

      1. I realize you think everything is about you, but if you look through this whole series, you will find nothing anywhere with me attacking you personally. Nothing. When I talk about comments or reactions of readers, it appears you feel so guilty you see it as a personal attack. I would never do that to you or anyone else on this blog. I'm looking for discourse or even spirited debate on the issues, not slander against individuals.

        Just a thought: you could vehemently disagree with something here and state that without all these personal insults and attacks. You could say, "I think that idea is crazy and here's why..." Or "That argument makes no sense because..."

        When you can learn to do that, your viewpoints will get taken a lot more seriously, because you'll be debating the issues with critical thinking skills instead of the name calling and personal disparagement. Just a thought...

        -RG

        1. Randy,

          You can fool some of the people some of the time, but you cannot fool all of the people all of the time.

          There are truths and lies all in one in this comment. That is why these conversations are difficult and confusing. Half Truths are always worse than a complete lie.

          I will be a monkey's uncle if this was not at least in part a reaction to my arguments and comments from the previous posts. You can say anything you would like, you are not going to get me to believe it is not.

          I will claim my mistakes and do most of the time, and you know it. I have used I feel statements and you know it.

          We do not have the benefit of personally knowing each other so sometimes it is difficult to discern in what way some comments are intended. That is at least some of the problem sometimes.

          I see you as a guide and mentor. It is you that usually gets my out of control anger and insults. I do project onto you. If you are not ready to do group therapy stop trying. You cannot be both participant and leader and do each successfully.

          Look back a couple of posts at how nice Sean was with my bad behavior. He didn't let me off the hook, he didn't say what I did was okay but he had empathy. EMPATHY.

          When I see mean personal things to you, which, is not all the time, it comes from a dark place in me that needs to be inspected with a light. Yes, I feel bad when it happens. If you are the great mentor Natalie says, why don't you just say something helpful? There is a fine line my friend between tough love and being hateful. You have to know when to be gentle and when to be firm and when to combine the two.

          We are dealing with two different issues. ONE:Our Relationship to each other on this blog. TWO:Whether or not you are being misleading in your attemp to be inspiring others self growth.

          I get angry when I lay my soul vulnerable only to find out that what I say, might be construed as agreeing with some crazy idea about altruism and selfishness. With these lasts posts it is hard to see the forest for the trees. I see the trees and the forest, and I think despite some of my more irrational posts, I did a damn good job explaining why I felt that way. NO comment from you. You should have commented not because I just wanted your attention, but because you really should have. I made excellent points on this post about why I felt you were wrong. You did not say a peep, you just were content to let others insult me. That hurt, that caused me to cry, because sometimes I'm stupid enough to think you might be my friend.

          I beg for your attention sometimes it is true, but I have been working on not doing it. I will own that. I will own that I take things personally when I shouldn't sometimes. But I will not own being wrong about this post being partly directed toward me, because I feel to state otherwise would be a prevarication.

          So sorry if I hurt your feelings Randy. I sometimes look at you as being impervious to my insults, because you seem so above the fray. I think he will see that nonsense for what it is.

          When I make some claims though, I am being honest. It is not to hurt you it is to help you see something you are doing as not entirely loving. You want to help us so much, it only seems fair to help you sometimes too.

          I have made many mistakes in my life for sure, some I have not and may never share here; it doesn't always seem safe. I feel guilty for them too, as I should. Don't tell me, I know. I also assert my right to make mistakes and learn from them, as everyone should have that right.

          You are usually very kind to me Randy, when I have made life not that easy for you, so thank you. Sometimes, I do think you have written things because you thought it might make me happy as well as others. For instance, the time you used the feminine pronoun, I thought that was very sweet. Also, the picture of Prague, it made me cry, in a good way. Even if you weren't thinking of me a little when you did those things, I loved them.

          Annie

          PS Look at the good work Victoria and I did on this blog. It isn't an entirely toxic blog. She and I argued came to our own conclusions and made up. I really like that woman, I understand her anger with me, just as I understand my own. Anyway, we did good and added peace, love and understanding in the world.

          1. Annie,

            Oh dear Annie!!!

            RG is VERY clear on what comments are allowed: "fun, brilliant, add to the dialogue." That may be a brilliant guide for us all, eh?

            Write out our comments and before hitting enter ask ourselves: "does this add, is it fun, brilliant, and critical to promote our greatness?" THen we can ALL come to the blog KNOWING that we're giving our best and creating an atmosphere and space that we can be known as inspirational, creative, amazing, and leaders that touch, uplift and transform lives. That people can come here KNOWING they're going to be treated with respect and honoured (INCLUDING RG!!!!!!)... That we honour the qualities of prosperity - which for me are loving, open, fresh, curious, accepting, playful, vulnerable, empathic, caring, courageous, intentional...

            What's your intent when you come here annie? Often it feels thtat you're here to cause a storm, and create hate. That may have been your past Annie - but it doesn't have to be your future. You can choose to be Great.

            You have greatness in you. At some point rather than wishing RG gave YOU attention, you'll begin to give yourself the attention you want from him. You'll feed yourself with greatness, and stop begging it from him, and giving to yourself. You'll selifishly realise that attacking him is only attacking yourself. And that YOU are the one who has to give to you, to save you, to touch your own life... And at that point.. you may begin to ponder...

            I'm getting excited that at some point you'll begin to ask yourself

            *who am I attacking? (because it is not Randy really - it may feel real - but look deeper and further back in your life)

            *who am I hating? (RG has done nothing here but serve - who is it who's upset you in your life that you are now taking it out on Randy?)

            *Who lied to you that makes you think Randy is lying? (He has a statement that he said the first week I spoke with him: "I will never knowingly lie to you." I promise you that's true for you too Annie - so check in when you think he's lying, because it's the anger you feel from someone else that you put on him - I bet!)

            * who gave you half truths Annie = because RG is pretty clear with his thinking? Who have you put onto him that is NOT who he is?

            * who is the one wanting group therapy? - Randy has DONE that already... he doesn't want it now, that's why he doesn't leap in. Who's the one needing to own stuff rather than project it?

            * DO you notice the double binds you create: "leap in and I make you wrong, don't leap in and I attack you for not commenting?" Either way RG can not win in your mind. Why do you want him to fail Annie? Who is it that you wish had failed? That you wanted to hurt for getting at you? That you felt betrayed by and could never fully show your hurt to? When you deal with it Annie you'll be so gloriously free.... I PROMISE Randy does not want to get at you. There are times I've thought he wanted to get at me. It NEVER was true. When he DOES want to get at me he'll say "Go check I wrote a blog for you" or he'll let me know clearly when I'm not doing what I need to be doing! Lol!

            *why if someone gives you attention are they good? MANY people don't and they are good... and they add peace/love/understanding? Do they have to communicate with YOU for that to happen? RG does that DAILY with his blog - yet in your attack and insults you MISS his intention of giving value... Why do you see his intention ALWAYS or MOSTLY as wrong? Who is it that wronged you that you WISHED could give you the right attention? It's not RG I promise you!

            * Who's the one who's trying to be participant and leader? Who's the one who's trying to control who speaks, how they speak, what they say, who they communicate with, which words are okay for RG to use, what's okay and what's not okay, who's commenting on everything and lashing out to get attention and say which posts are right or not?

          2. Annie, I laughed when you wrote that you consider Randy a friend!! What is a FRIEND to you? Someone who you shit all over and they take it like a doormat. Someone who you treat badly and they never react? Someone who's there for you no matter what? Paulo Coelho says that a true friend is not someone who's there in your worst (that's someone who's toxic who feeds off your weakness) but someone who celebrate joy with you - laughs, delights, and enjoys your Greatness.

            Do you truly consider yourself a friend? are you loving, treasuring, kind? Would YOU want to be friends with YOU if you treated you like you treat Randy?

            You are audacious in your awesomeness!!!! I don't even consider myself to be Randy's friend. He would NEVER hang out here with me, he'd never come to see me even if he's in the same country, he'd never walk over to say hi to me even if I'm in the same room as him. He'd never call to ask for my advice. He'd never call to tell me his secrets, he'd never call to share his ups and downs with me. He's not my friend. It's not a mutual relationship. I'm not that arrogant to assume it's a close friendship - I can WISH it was more, but I don't deserve it. It's unlikely that I'll ever be his friend. When I get to where he is in his being, thinking, doing, having he'll be 100% more amazing... I've seen him change in the 10 years I've known him each and every year... As I change so does he. I'm under no illusion that I'll ever be close to him. Sure he loves me. But I'm not a friend. He has 3/4 friends maybe 5. Real friends... I'm not one of them. I'm not worthy of being one of them - I'm a pain in the arse a lot of the time to him!!!!! And I can imagine him laughing - because when I tell him he's not my friend, he's telling others he is!!!!! And I'm grateful because I haven't been awesome enough to be his friend... One day... When I become the Greatness that he sees me as when I forget who I can be! Cos we have a laugh and enjoy each other... But now I'm still too distorted in my thinking and being to host his heart and life... I've got a lot of growing to do til then...

            Regarding licking his arse - a mutual friend of mine and RG asked me to lick his ear, does that count???!!!!! LOL!

            One final thought... MY dear friend Bob Burg always says: CHECK YOUR PREMISES then you're on the same page... So, what is a guide and a mentor for you?

            For me - it's someone who leads the way, and a mentor is someone to shows me the path because they've done it already. It's someone I learn from, respect, and earn their time from because I'm applying what they teach the best I can...

            Where did you come to think that you are entitled to attack and treat him like shit? PArt of that entitlement is out of a victim mentality - that you feel you are owed and deserving of something when you aren't. He owes you nothing! He offers things out of goodness...

            Who showed you that attacking those who are good to you is how to be? It's not fair, right or healthy!

            Where did you learn that because someone is in a leadership position they deserve to be attacked? Who taught you that those in authority are objects for projections and can just be attacked?

            Where did you learn that a mentor is also a therapist and trained to give emotional healing? And take transferance?

            Randy isn't trained as a therapist. He's simply a high school drop out who had a drug problem who totally transformed his life, got out of being a victim and decided to evolve into his highest potential in every way possible. If you'd like to achieve your potential in every way possible this is the blog for you...

            If not... I ponder if you're in the right place? xoxo

            1. I hadn't read this one, when I wrote my last comment. Natalie, excuse me, but what the hell?

              If Randy knows you and talks to you, and wouldn't acknoweledge you in a crowd, I would call that man a horses back end. EWWW! I wouldn't care to know him if he was like that. Who does he think he is the Millonaire Messiah? (That's a joke) Randy is a person Natalie. If he is really like that, which I know we don't know maybe, then he is not a very nice one, or an exteremely narcissitic one at best.

              If you think you are not enough yet to be his friend, you are sadly mistaken, and if he thinks that, he is mistaken too.

              Honestly, and you will find this extremely arrogant I suppose, I am not sure Randy is worthy of my friendship. How's that grab ya?

            2. It kinda graps me as sad Annie - why would you want to manipulate everything anyone says into something they didn't say to prove your point that they are awful when you don't know him? Hmmm....

              What's intersting to me is you avoid all accountability for your actions (blaming him, others, or saying you righteously are proud of being arrogant and honest), yet you do not respond to ANY queries on why you are here, what energy you'd like to create here, what gives you the right to treat him like shit, and why you ONLY choose to REACT rather than learn?

              I guess your BEHAVIOUR speaks volumes - the ONLY thing you are going to do is attack him.

              Just so I'm clear... and I hope you get it now: Annie - you twist words to make YOUR point - to prove your distorted reality that he's a terrible, arrogant man. That's NOT my reality!!!! I love Randy dearly and am highly and heavenly grateful. I'm so aprpeciate that hes in my life. He's amazing... and you can be happy and joyful too to be here rather than demanding, and violating. It's an honour to be on this blog - not your RIGHT. Instead you come here being entilted, angry, aggresive, catty, bitchy and looking for the worst!!!!

              I NEVER said he didn't acknowledge me. He acknowledges me everytime he sees me with beaming smiles, joyful welcoming, humour, warmth and authenticity. He jokes with me, and makes everyone laugh at my silly ways with me. In a room of 5000 people he does not look for me and come to find me to ensure I'm okay. He KNOWS I'll find him if I need him and if I don't we'll email which is quieter and easier for him with masses around. When there are hundreds of people trying to get some of him he doesn't come to worry over me. I respect his time and space a lot. When we get a chance we touch base and I feel special and adored - as does he! At big events he's having to meet lines of people who all want bits of him... He's having photo's taken at every second, signing books, meeting people, answering questions, hearing stories... and so gracious to everyone. Giving them everything they need! It's a LOT! And must be draining and exhausting. At those events I am not thinking "what can he do for me?" but I ponder "what might RG need from me to make his time easier and happier?" or "is there anything I could ask him to record for others that would inspire them and touch their lives" so when we do have time together I utilise it to make a difference... He's VERY generous like that!

              At any break if I'm in the same area we chat if he has the time, energy, and space... he does videos for my kids and my fb group... he's generous hearted and sweet. When he's leading, hosting, speaking, and running an event he doesn't have TIME to socialise... He's rushing, organising, sorting things out, presenting.

              You missed my point of RESPECT and high regard for a mentor vs assuming a right to be a friend when that is not the function of our relationship (he called to be my MENTOR, not my friend. I am truly BLESSED and honoured, and grateful, I don't assume to be more than that!) You manipulated it into your distorted reality of DISRESPECT and attack where you feel entitled to assume you can take and demand friendship like it's your right - where in fact that's something that's given out of mutual joy and delight. WOW!

              You want him to be a friend when you choose to see him as a horses end, arrogant, not nice, narcisstic and stinky - rather than understanding the motive, the time constraints, the work, leadership, the admiration, treasuring... Why do you always go to see the worst Annie? Why come here if you don't want to learn from him and want to find ways and reasons to hate him, rather than unlearn your own self-hatred? Why are out out to prove hers an arsehole?

              I guess if your reality of yourself is such - that is ALL you can see in others.

      2. Annie,

        You know at times I have challenges with Randy - and I'll say to him "Randy, When x/y happened I was hurt, I feel unmet and unheard... " Or whatever... And he'll share what he thinks, and we'll go on back and forth until we resolve things. And he'll use humour and make me laugh... and show me how I can relate with lightness and not be so caught in drama/victim cycles. He shows me how I can be more peaceful, loving and strong in relationships - without being so reactive when I disagree with him. SO I can understand the challenges that you have... He'll even joke with me... call me names to make me laugh so I break out of my resistance and stuckness. I'm grateful for him doing this - because it teaches me how to do this for myself. He highlights when I'm stuck, so I can become aware for myself when I'm stuck and get out of it.

        I'm aware you sometimes don't notice you're stuck in an abusive comment - it just comes out and you can't stop it. You only realise afterwards. That must be hard to see afterwards you doing that... and being cruel and harsh without being able to stop yourself. This doesn't make you a bad person - you wouldn't be here if you weren't a bad person. You're here because you want to learn how to come right - to be open, loving, amazing and all you can be in life. Though sometimes the way you have been treated comes flooding out without you knowing how to change it...

        I can understand that at times you don't feel love, and maybe you see the love that some of us feel here from Randy and you want that too - and not having that is sore and hard for you. And when you're stressed or oversensitive that comes out in judgment rather than saying how you feel hurt, unloved, uncared for and unmet. It's okay to say "I feel desperately wanting attention, I feel needy and want more..." Tho insulting Randy personally is not okay. I know it might be hard to see that in the moment. That maybe they feel like the same thing... And that you're justified in your attack. You are not. It is not okay to attack Randy. He's a generous soul who writes her to serve others because he's a good, kind man. He has tremendous integrity and is someone who truly wants to (and DOES) make a huge difference. You wonder why we come out to share her goodness? You see - when I go off the rails and forget myself he'll call me to remind me how I can break through. Or he'll say "I wrote a blog for you - check it out..." or he'll twitter me a comment with love so I stay on track. He's ALWAYS reminding me where I'm slipping up, and where I'm great. That he believes in me. FOR FREE. He doesn't get paid to love me. He does it simply because he's a good man. Even tho sometimes I think differently/wrongly/distortedly when i'm feeling insecure - that I couldn't imagine that he'd give so much time and effort to me for nothing. In those times I burst into tears and he reminds me how much he cares for nothing, just because he sees greatness in me... and it thrills him to see me living that. I have never had such love - so consistently without punichment, rejections, cruelty, silent treatment, abuse... (apart from my kids) so it's feels like it's been forever for me to actually allow him to love me, and give to me... It takes a lot for me to let him in. So when you do attack him - I do feel enraged because you don't see how sweet he is. And you treat him like an object of your projections, rather than a human being - who feels, has a heart, who cares and loves a lot. Annie - he even cares a lot about you! Which is why he doesn't remove you... He understands you - because he was there once... He was in that victim space and grew out of it...

        I know it's hard to trust him, and his ways. I know he speaks in passionate and wild language that you seem to react to and find hard when you take personally. That reaction is your gift to show you the edges that still need loving in you. They aren't the things to attack Randy for. He communicates like that to trigger the beliefs that hold you back. It's purposeful to SERVE you, not to piss you off!

        I see writing on this blog is hard for you. I see you haven't been taught how to own what you feel and express yourself without attack. That must be hard now having had those role models to show you... You haven't been taught how to relate without insult, blame, attack, judgment, and resentments...

        You read something of Randy's and take it personally and react. You then reread what you write and realise that it's attacking but you feel justified because he attacked you (when he hasn't and won't).

        Then because you have attacked Randy personally others come to show the other side to balance that out (a natural and normal equilibriation process) - to bring correction to your harsh attacks that are not based on a reality of knowing, meeting or loving Randy - but on your assumptions, personal insecurities, and need for attention.

        When you don't get that attention you go more negative and attack him in every response you can. Even if the person is saying NOTHING about Randy - you bring it into the conversation to attack him personally. It's like you don't mind what attention you get - you just are gagging for attention for him - whether its positiv eor negative you don't mind. You just need a fix of him. Then you settle for a while- until you need the next dose.

        I'm wonder here if you can learn to speak in ownership - I language? It may help to get the book "How to Speak so Kids will Listen and Listen so kids will speak." By Faber and Malzish. It shows you how to go from reaction into feelings, ownership, and healthy expression.

        I use this book for teaching parenting classes - and it's great for parents who were not allowed feelings and weren't allowed to express what they feel, and thus don't have a feeling language and don't know how to discuss what's happening for them without reaction.

        ONe final thought is this. Randy is the most loving person I know. Hands down. His love isn't always NICE, comfortable and easy. It's very tough at times. And only because he knows that sometimes i do things that sabotage myself and he gives me the strength I need for both of us, until I've stopped wobbling and grown it in myself.

        When he's TOUGH loving sometimes it hurts me - and I share that. He reminds me that he loves me. And I get to see that because I'm hurting it's often because of the pain or yuck stuff that happened to me as a kid and I'm projecting it onto him. He holds me in his heart and reminds me that it's not that, and he has my greatness at stake, and he believes in me. While my mother - for instance - finds it hard to celebrate my Greatness, Randy consistently and strongly reminds me of who I am.

        In my distorted thinking I might get angry with Randy about something - and he;ll break it down to show me that my thinking is wrong. I'm okay with being wrong - when I see it not serving me...

        One thing I've struggled with is letting Randy love me. Because I didn't always feel loved in childhood learnign to RECEIVE his love has ben challenging. I fight him off in my mind, rather than relax into it. When he tells me he does sometimes I used to think "you're just saying that to make me feel better" Maybe you have this too? Maybe because you can't receive love because you didn't get it you constantly push, attack, argue to keep people away to prove that you are unlovable? I promise you it feels SO much better to let others in...

        Growing up with a single mother of 4 kids we were more used to fighthing for attention than getting it normally. I've had to reparent myself, and learn to parent properly to break out of those unhealthy cycles. And I know that you can do this too Annie...

        I know you can let go of your addiction to drama/bad treatment/victim mentality to be treated well, happily, lovingly, amazingly and celebrated for your gifts and contribution, rather than condemned for your attacks and negativity.

        Annie - my request of you is that you comes to the blog with an attitude of learning - when you're open you can allow change in. When you're being right about how wrong everyone is you get attacked - and that reaffirms how unloved and worthless you are.

        On this blog we see you Annie, and we see beyond your bullshit - we hear your cry for help. And ultimately only YOU can help yourself. EVERYONE here comes to learn. Not to be attacked or defend Randy.

        I wonder how you could assist in creating an envirnment of learning here? Or growing?

        I know when people have been taught that their feelings are wrong that it's hard to be vulnerable and attack sustains that stances of courage. One of the most courageous things people can do is to be vulnerable and share "I feel scared, I feel needy, I feel unwanted and undeveloped..." The people can love you for your honesty and authenticity... Rather than you attacking the love you feel jealous of - which pushes it away even more!!!! We all want the best for you... I hope you can let in the gift this is... Loads of love to you Annie...

        1. Natalie,

          See my above comments to Randy.

          Your friend Sean, and I have to really laugh at my silly self now for thinking he was Randy, is very sweet. He did a great job of helping me out of an uncomfortable spot! You are lucky to know two very nice men.

          I use to look every now and then at our conversation on that 2010 post. It was a good conversation, and sometimes I play that Katy Perry song!

          Annie

          1. Annie,

            I'd love you to read this again and again... And hear what you learnt from it rather than dismiss it because it's getting you to reflect at things that may be painful...

            I'd love you to hear the love here for you... and also the VERY strong request that you own your stuff... Yes selfishly for us who love coming here, AND for YOU. hen you'd come home to you - and begin to totally love you as you awaken to all of you!

            Randy is human... When I attack him he defends. It's normal and naturally response.

            When I am needy and demanding it's draining and sticky yuck. No one wants to be around me at those times.

            When I am boldly, openly and gloriously sharing authentically about myself, my challenges and my learnings and asking him what's next for me - and coming to him with a BIG heart, and VERY open mind he'll say (for example) "I find it's good to ask 'what am I holding onto that may be holding me back?'"

            If you want his attention I find I have to DESERVE it. Things that worked for me: Be open. Be receptive. Be willing to learn.

            Sean is ALL of those things. Can he call me day or night for love, friendship, advice, or to share something? Yes - even at 3am. Which is when he tends to call! And he knows that because he comes to me in cherishing that no matter what time he calls EVER in 2 decades I will ALWAYS be kind, loving, and happy to hear from him. Even at 2am!!! Maybe if you chose a knew attitude and came in with an open mind RG would give you insights and attention... right now you don't seem ready, willing or able to receive his goodness....

            And maybe one day soon Annie you'll be willing to let in enough joy to see that RG is a good man, with a good heart who gives daily to you JUST in writing this blog. I wonder if you changed your perspective to thinking "because Randy loves me he writes this blog nearly every day. Aren't I lucky to be loved this much?" And each time you react you could think: "is this NOW I'm reacting too, or the distorted thinking I was programmed into. RG is a loving man, would someone who is loving me write this to hurt me? Would someone with a deep faith and commitment to Greatness want to put me down? How is he challenging me to wake up? What is he asking me to love and heal in myself so I can open to more goodness?"

            1. Natalie,

              I don't know where I should be replying anymore, but this is my last post this evening. Thank you if you are trying to help me, but I just don't want it, not now, maybe never. I mean I don't want this conversation with you, please lets just say goodnight and sweet dreams. This isn't prosperous, and it is probably making Randy nauseated. 🙂 So, Take Care Lady Okay? Have a good rest of the weekend with no worries.

              Annie

    25. Randy,
      Please give some serious consideration to what is occuring in this blog. When you take on leadership, in any capacity, you have a huge responsibility and I am concerned you are creating a very negative vacuum with this. You have very vulnerable people on this blog and if you don't take control and change the temperature, I think you may be doing some serious damage right now. I give you the benefit of the doubt that this is not self entertainment for you or ego driven, but if it is I will delete you in a key stroke.

      1. Yes I was thinking that if I didn't acknowledge some of the personal attacks they might die off, but I can see that isn't happening. I am aware of what you mean and will have to change some things. Thanks, RG

      2. Mary Ellen

        I hear your call for things to be kind, respectful, welcoming, and positive.

        When things get attacking they feel toxic for you and the temperature feels ugly and heated, eh? You're wondering why Randy doesn't leap in and change the atmosphere? Why he doesn't hold the space more so it feels safe and warm?

        I understand that...

        What I see is that he creates a space - where leaders can grow. Where he allows things and hosts a space for us to become leaders... Where he allows people to show up as they are... and be true to ourselves...

        How I've seen Randy work is to lead from the front and go forward... He's not into fixing things... His way of "discipline" is allowing people to see themselves. In the mirror the wake up to what needs changing...

        Rather than EXTERNAL motivation via chastisment, he opens people to see themselves so that when they change personally. They don't change for HIM, they change for themselves. Then the change is real for them. They have come to see who THEY are and they change because they WANT to. They outgrow their unhealthy behaviour because they are compelled from within to become there best.

        It's an intrinstic motivation that he fosters - by being strong, focused, and passionate about his philosophy... He's more like a pide-piper leader singing his tune of prosperity from the front rather than stopping the bickering for his tune to be sung just to one being. He sings and shine and flows...and trust everyone to grow - he believes in their own ability to change rather than fix them.

        I ponder if he knows and trusts that things will unravel, that goodness prevails... And that we are all joyfully growing in the best ways we can.

        Having been a counsellor for nearly 2 decades - I frequently see how clients who are transforming attack and attack and attack personally when they are changing. Their attack is often an indication of the huge transformation that is about to take place. Jung says that it takes a huge amount of aggression at times to break through past programming... So in a way it's exciting to see the anger and upset - it just shows the breakthrough that is about to take place. All that's happening is that the energy is growing for the breakthrough.

        It takes a lot of force and power to slash the shains that binds us. Some people know how to get energy positively, and others only know how to do that with attack. It would be nice if it was kind... eh?

        While it looks like a negative vacuum - I think it's Love getting the energy to see itself! xoxox

    26. Hey there:

      I know it's late on a Friday night, but something that happened tonight got me to see what Randy is talking about, and I thought I'd share about it.

      Some friends of mine were in town (Los Angeles) from Northern Cal., and I went drinking with them out on the West Side. When I got to the bar, I ordered a beer, and we began chatting and having a great time.

      Then, without me even knowing it, someone ordered a round of Jaeger Bombs. Now, I've had enough experience with Jaeger to know that I don't tolerate it well. It's the one type of alcohol that makes me turn into a raging asshole (pardon the language). So, I told them that, and told them I didn't want one. They said, "Don't worry, you were a raging asshole in high school and that's what we love about you." After a bit more peer pressure, I gave in.

      Within about 10 minutes, I was getting upset real easily and started going on rants, not only about outside things, but with the very people I came to have a good time with. When I reminded them that Jaeger Bombs make me a raging asshole, they started trying to make me feel bad about it. One of my friends actually said, "Dom, you don't want me to be the one to end this." So, I said, "OK, I'll end it then." After a few more minutes, someone ordered another round of Jaeger Bombs. I told the waiter I didn't want one, but they ordered it anyway.

      At that point, once the waiter left, I decided I was gonna take off. My friends were really upset. one of them even refused to shake my hand as I left. I went home, got clear of the resentment that I still had, and texted them saying that I was sorry to cut things short, but that I was all good and we'd talk again soon. I got over the resentment quickly and would definitely hang out with them anytime, but I will never sacrifice my own evening for the sake of someone else's good time.

      What I got out of this is that all of us went there to have a good time tonight, but "good time" meant something different to me than it did to them. To them, good time meant that THEY would have a good time by ME making an ass of myself. They had no regard for the fact that I wouldn't have a good time. I gave in initially, thinking that it would be selfish to refuse a drink.

      But finally my healthy selfishness won out. I saw that my enjoyment of the evening was more important to me than sacrificing it so that others might be able to enjoy theirs at my expense.

      Real prosperity for all means that you don't have to sacrifice yourself in order that others may have. Real prosperity means that we can all have what we want, and while we can support each other in achieving our goals, we ought not sacrifice our own goals in order to ensure that anyone else reaches theirs.

      So, while I went tonight with a selfish intention, that I have a good time, it was a a selfish intention that allowed others to have a good time as well. My friends, on the other hand, developed the idea that they could have a better time without regard for whether or not I was OK. They expected me to be willing to sacrifice my good time so that they could have a better time.

      Do you see the two different types of selfishness? One type recognizes that your own happiness is the most important, and that you ought not sacrifice it for anyone else, while the other type desires that others sacrifice their own happiness (or whatever else) for your sake. I think that when Randy talks about selfishness, he's talking about the first type, but because the word is usually associated with the second type, it wasn't well received by some of us with the best of intentions.

      Peace and good night, Dom

    27. Dear Annie - you often speak of how you are almost genetically programmed to help others and yet you seem vehemently opposed to so much of what Randy expouses and you express it in such a violent manner. Being from the emerald isle myself I know irish people are very passionate - which is great if channeled positively but unfortunately uncontrolled passion or intransigence is what caused the "troubles" or the war there which caused so many tragic deaths. (I can feel your blood rise from here.) You are very high spirited and I love your sense of humour but I think you would get a lot more from this blog if you took things less personally. Sometimes I look at the blog and think , is this blog about "Why Doing Good Is Selfish" (in this case) or is it about Annie? As you feel so passionately about things maybe you should start your own blog. I am not asking you to agree with everything Randy says - everyone is entitled to their own opinion(including Randy.) It reminds me of when I brought Mark Victor Hansen to Geneva in 2006 and I had offered a money back guarantee if people didn't like it. The next day 2 young girls called me asking for a refund saying "he had no idea what he was talking about" - the man that sold 120 million books........ and this is just a small fraction of what he is about! You were quite scathing about Randy not defending himself - this is one of the reasons these people are so prolific and why they have The Midas Touch - because they are highly disciplined and know exactly where to put their focus. Personally I am soooo grateful for the inspiration these people bring to my life and I choose to learn from them as I will be elated when I can do as much good in the world as they are doing. In the meantime I choose to love me and my life just as it is.

    28. Natalie and Hilary,

      I don't try to justify my comments, preferring to let them and the discussion they evoke speak for themselves. And when things seem to get off track, it's usually best to let the blog community take care of it and get things back on the right course. In this post I finally felt I needed to say something. Obviously that was a mistake, because you two handled things in a much better and more prosperous way than I did! So thank you for that.

      -RG

      1. Randy, you should have said some things earlier and not necessarily to me.

        I am proud of myself because I have been raw, real, and honest. Not perfect. Not positive always, honest.

        I know some of the people on this blog are business associates of yours and can't afford that kind of let your hair down honesty. However, the way some of them kiss you ass, and conceal nastiness with a smile is unnerving.

        So, you could look at some of the name calling as a good place to stop some of the phony stuff. However, I hope one day myself included we are all real and nice. 🙂

        We should be positive. But, we should also be real with our emotions, always. And learn to say them nicely. Nicely, Annie nicely.

        Annie

        1. Annie - I like that you say one day maybe we are all real and nice. You could ask that with EACH and EVERY post you write eh?

          Why wait for some day? You're great Annie - I bet you could do it every day...

          And the days you are triggered? I don't think you need to be raw, real, and honest in the way you have been if that looks like attacking RG, insulting people, calling him names, distorting what hes saying to prove he's wrong... That's not raw, real and honest for me. That's being distorted, looking at others through a lens that makes them wrong, rather than gains any understanding or growth...

          Raw, real and honest looks like this to me:

          "I feel angry, hurt, and wild when I read what's posted here. I feel victimised and upset. I'm taking it personally and its sore. I don't know why I'm triggered, but something's touched me. I think it's when you use fundamentalist - it hits me, and hurts me. I don't know why I react to that... Maybe I have friends who are fundamentalist and I feel protective of them and I'm like a mama bear. I know they can be weird in their views, but I also love them. I feel like attacking back to hurt you back. I'm breathing to calm myself. I feel confused, and angry... I want to know why you hate them? I feel like you hate me when you hate them. I don't want to be hated. Suddenly as I reread my words I see that I felt hated and attack for having strong views, and felt weird for them. I wanted love and I got judgment instead. I just wanted love. I'm upset now. It hurts. It makes me angry. I feel enraged. I'm going to go and draw my anger, and dance my anger. I'm going to explore the times I felt rejected for being me so that I can love all of me so I feel great again. I know it's not true that YOU are hating me - so I'm going to explore privately what this is about so I can come to see and know myself and my hate and anger so I have more control and power in myself. I want a breakthrough around this, so I feel stronger and more empowered, I hate feeling this triggered and weak... I want to love every little bit of this pain, and hurt and love all of me better. Ow. It hurts. Breathing deeply and wishing you well!"

          I hope this helps... joy to you...and I hope you breath in hope much love there is for you here...

          1. Natalie,

            You know honestly, I was feeling happy until I had read your posts. And now I am angry. I am not you. I will not sound like you when I am upset. I am not sure right now if you really want to help me or if you are trying to help out Randy.

            I have been waving the white flag of reconcillication today. Do you know Natalie, what that suggests? That perhaps I have already without your help considered all these things all ready. I might also add that you mentioned above you haven't been reading my posts anymore so I am not sure why you feel you are at the liberty to say the things you do. You in my opinion, are the one stirring up drama right now.

            I am pretty pissed right now that you keep at me. Are you afraid of letting Randy fight this battle? If so you may want to ask yourself why.

            I am getting tired of you playing therapist with me. So, I am asking you politely to stop. And stop now.

            I don't feel love from you, if you are trying to help only you know, because it is not resonating with me that way right now.

            I have spoken my truth, let it speak for itself. And NOW with kind regards LEAVE ME BE.

            Annie

            1. IT's interesting that when someone DOES reach out to love/help serve you you get angry.... and question the motives...

              And when they DON'T you get angry... and say you are not loved...

              Annie - NEITHER are true. Like Randy says to me - there are times I need to show you how your thinking is distorted and tell you the truth.

              Wayne Dyer says: "When you squeeze an Orange, what comes out? No matter WHO squeezes it, what is IN the orange must come out. Whether it's bitter or sweet or bland, it doesn't matter WHO squeezes it, what is INSIDE it comes out." It seems unloved angry comes out of you...

              By the way there's a difference between a REQUEST, and a command or a demand. This: "So, I am asking you politely to stop. And stop now." is the latter to me.

              I'd love to make my own request: Please respect and honour this blog and it's purpose. It's about prosperity and success. Both of which I'm focused on and I'd love to come here and truly learn from this man who's achieved both with love, integrity, discipline, multitasking mastery and generosity... And co-create magic within the community that touches, inspires, uplifts, and opens the world the gift that it is...

              I'd also like to request you end your attack on RG and use the energy of your anger to break through your own shit rather than blindly attack him. Otherwiwse its a waste of energy that serves no on. It's toxic - and not what I want to be around. If you can't do that please see a therapist until you can. This place isn't where you can wipe your shoes... It's my santuary, not your doormat. If you are going to project, attack and insult on here there are many who can step in to be give you a sense that you're in group therapy so that you get the help you need. You decide - treat the blog with respect, or behave like a victim and receive therputic help here or elsewhere.

              That said, Randy doesn't need my help! I'm not afraid for Randy - I'm being selfish. I'm loving MYSELF and trying to create an atmosphere and space of support and challenge to create a prosperous and successful space here. Is that not what you want?

              What I'd love is to come to this blog and be celebrating and learning about success and prosperity. Wouldn't you? Are you wanting to be prosperous and succesful more than you are already? Is that your purpose here? What energy and atmosphere are you wanting to create her Annie? Is it aligned with the blogs purpose? I expect everyone here to be owning, exploring and using this blog to realise their highest potential in prosperity and success.

              What can we do to create a blog that oozes with prosperity and success Annie? How can you contribute to this to a sacred space of learning, creating, celebrating rather than attacking with negation, frustration and reaction? How can we as a community create an atmosphere that attracts AWESOMENESS, greatness, and cherishes the GIFT that we ALL are?

              Blessing with gratitude... xoxo

            2. Natalie,

              You guessed right I was demanding you to stop. It wasn't meant to be anything other than a command. I am setting a boundry with you. You did not respect it either. Once again, if you have not been reading these posts, I have no idea why you think you are at liberty to say the things you do.

              Please be respectful of my response. I was nice earlier to your long winded psychobabble post, and I no longer feel like being nice to you.

              You are not helping me or you at this point. I will not grant your request you have made, because you have unfairly accused me of things I will not claim to be true in my opinion.

              How dare you. I have treated Randy with disrespect, and it was not right. I wonder if you realize you are now doing the same to me.

              While you cannot tell me what to post to Randy, if you want me to stop responding to you I will. If Randy tells me to stop posting I will.

              If you are hearing what I am saying please, do your best to use restraint in your next comment.

            3. Annie, I boudnary has been set many times with you - and refuse to honour it. Each time you post Randy's words are right above that requesting you ADD to the dialogue - not insult. Randy has requested you use I language and quit attacking. You refuse to honour him. You continue to attack him personally.

              If you continue to attack, I shall know it is because you need support to reflect and question your negative views and behaviour. OR You may choose to behave here with respect, kindness and a willingness to learn and I shall enjoy your contribution with appreciation. YOU decide Annie. It's your choice. COme here to learn with respect and ownership of your feelings without attack OR it will be taken as a clear sign that you do not know how to treat people, and are asking for support to learn how to behave in a kind, respectful and honouring way. You decide.

              If you have to continue with you anger, reactions and upset, I shall reflect your behaviour so you see it clearly, firmly, loving but ensuring you see it. You are welcome to get angry with me for doing that - tho as per Randy's request: without attack, name calling, or insult when I hold the mirror to you... It's up to you Annie. How will you play ball?

              Are you going to come here to learn prosperity and play nicely?

              I dare ya! You know you want to 😉

            4. Annie,

              How you feel has nothing to do with what is being described....and suggested by others...

              This is something totally different, isn't it?

              Victoria

            5. Victoria,

              I am so tired, I don't know anymore. I just want to move on. Thanks.

              Annie

      2. Natalie,

        I refuse to accept what you say as the accurate reflection of who I am or what I say. You are not able to mirror what you cannot see.

        You think you will shame/frighten/guilt me, well I do not accept your vigorous attacks. I think today you have behaved as if perhaps not more disrespectfully than I ever have.

        You are not aware that what you are doing is not loving? Love requires empathy and grace, and when one receives it they can feel it.

        It is interesting how you keep begging me to be nice and not attack, when I responded once to you kindly enough. Yet, you had to keep trying to therapize me or something, I don't really know what your goal is.

        I think there is fine line between tough love and hateful behavior, better check which side your on.

        Annie

        If you want me to behave like you model better behavior.

        1. Annie,

          Loving doesn't mean agreeing with someone or condoning their behaviour. Loving is like today saying to the boys at the back of the church "Be Quiet" - even with the father standing with them ignores their loudness because he's too timid to control his son. Loving is also discipline and showing consequences - if someone can not control their own behaviour and insist on attacking, insulting and being rude and creating a toxic environment there are results to that... It's a choice if someone wants to be included and enjoyed, or be disciplined for behaving rudely in someone elses home/blog.

          Many times Randy teaches us to grow as leaders and says - if there's someone at the back of the room doing something they shouldn't we need to step up and say something. For instance if he's talking he won't stop to ask a mother with a noisy baby to leave the room - he expects one of us will get up and request she leave until the baby has stopped crying. She may get offended, but it disturbs the atmosphere and stops people from being able to focus on what is being said. It's her choice to feel rejected but he teaches that as leaders he expects us to step in, and rise up, and do the right thing. I had this at the last meeting with him - a woman made a phone call on her mobile WHILE the presenter was speaking. SO disrespectful. I went to her and requested she stop. RG expects that we will support him in the crowd and do the right thing. He'll let me know if I'm not doing it right. Very quickly.

          I have NO intention to frighten/shame/make you feel guilty at ALL. My ONLY intention is to ensure that this space is a safe space to explore and realise prosperity, and success. My only intention is to support Randy to have his blog be a place focused on prosperity and success and NOT on attacks, insults, name calling and frustration... I want to have a place to come that is amazing... not a childrens playground with name calling, attacks, spite, biting, and personal insult without self control. This is not a field day for inner children to run amok - this is a blog designed to raise our consciousness. If you don't want that, and you want to disagree with as much as possible why are you here?

          When I woke this morning I the first words I heard where Randys "you do have the liberty to say what's okay." And I remembered how frequently he requests we stand up as leaders rather than allow bad behaviour. So I apologise to RG for just avoiding the comments, rather than stepping up. It was weak of me.

          We have tried requesting you respect this space, understanding your history and loving you through the issues/confusion/challenges you see yourself in that are manifest in this constant reaction, seeing behind it, reflecting who you are being, mirroring your behaviour, showing you how toxic you are being by creating and evoking drama and being a victim, we've tried to problem solve with you to establish a place that is glorious place to grow (safe, warm etc), we've asked your intention here and why you come here... Is there another way that I can help/challenge/request you with your personal attacks so that they STOP, and you come here to learn?

          In each situation when I have asked completely openly WHAT IS YOUR INTENTION and HOW CAN YOU SERVE AND ADD VALUE TO THE BLOG? I have not received an answer - there has only been reaction. COnstantly. Nothing productive, supportive, or focused in aligning with the blog. As one of the people RG mentors I need to step up to support him rather than ignore your posts - so he can focus on his writing, leading a 200 000+ organisation, creating products, etc. to serve many more than just those he mentors. I realise that maybe I have been wrong in simply avoiding what you write. Maybe I should have been asking you to think about your behaviour and make a choice:

          Either you come here with respect. Or you get help with your behaviour that is not acceptable so you can learn what that is appropriate, amazing and respectful. Or you do not post when you feel attacking. Or you leave?

          SO many options. I'd ask you Annie - if this was YOUR blog, would you allow someone like you here to attack the author, the readers, the content, the philosophy, without critical thinking or willingness to stay focused on the issues?

          Loads of love to you Annie! xox

          Randy has said clearly: do not personally attack, speak about the topic NOT the person, discuss issues

          1. Natalie,

            I didn't even read this one. And I won't. As I have said before I don't wish to have this discussion with you. Thanks for your attempts, let's let it go, and read about Hedonism!

            Annie

    29. Selflessness is NOT a prerequisite for valuing and truly helping others! You need a self to act in the world in favor of it. In fact, valuing others deeply will lead inevitably to valuing yourself more. If you keep fighting it, you are in for some very difficult, unproductive times... and you are most likely, not really valuing others, just "helping"...and that seldom helps! Great points as always! 😉

    30. Jesus Christ...what a long conversation.Tried to follow it but realized something like "this is not my business".Randy,have you read a book called "Back from tomorrow"?Maybe I have asked that before.George.G.Ritchie.What I see about Jesus is that he was not on peoples side like that.He did never judge.At least not after baptised into Christ.The christ did not judge,because he was able to see things from every point of view.And sometimes when we meet a peron who strongly has this force,we feel it and by that we can realize things about ourselfes,but not from a judging point.And I see you have that ames.To be able to see things from all sides.I guess that is why people connect to you so easily.

    31. sorry,my post was a bit mixed.I said Jesus Christ first because of the long conversation...and then I answered a comment...and then I started talking about you.Well well,it is sunday and I am on a diet.I guess i am excused...

    32. Incredible insights Randy - right on the mark!

      This reminds of the episode in "Friends" where Phoebe and Joey are having a dispute as to do whether or not Phoebe can do a "selfless" act.

      Basically she tried doing all of these "nice" things, but Joey reminded her that every nice thing she did... she did for selfish reasons (for the happiness it gave her, etc.)

      Anyway, awesome post!

      Jeremy Reeves
      http://www.JeremyReeves.com

    33. Nice manipilation of Mother Theresa's quote.to quote Mother Teresa herself, “To be able to give, you must have.” You know she meant love in the action service. You are funny. Your teachings on prosperity give a different look. But again just a look. So folk take what is useful and leave the rest alone. Randy is just a man with weakness's and strengths like everyone else. Prosperity is our birthright with or without Randy Gage!You gotta respect em though he gets u going and thinking! But he just plays a small world in the unlimited world of wealth doing and thinking!!

    34. Wow, this whole thing - article & comments really disturbed me. Mainly the fact that all of you seem to be attacking people who express an opinion that doesn't tally with Randy's or your own, for daring to express a different view - it's almost as if this is some kind of cult or totalitarian regime where everyone commenting must only express admiration & support for the views of the great, wise leader. Every individual is entitled to their own opinions & views - just because you don't like it or agree with it doesn't give you the right to be unbelievably vile & disrespectful to the person who has expressed this different perspective. And if you really believe everything that is written in this article, and truly feel comfortable with your perspectives on the world & the issue of doing good being 'selfish' then why get so defensive when you come up against opinions & beliefs that challenge your own?! Doesn't make your beliefs wrong & it doesn't make them right either - they just are & you are entitled to have them, but you've also got to respect the views of others & recognize that every individual thinks differently & has different views and beliefs, even if you don't agree with them.

    35. Wow, this whole thing - article & comments really disturbed me. Mainly the fact that all of you seem to be attacking people who express an opinion that doesn't tally with Randy's or your own, for daring to express a different view - it's almost as if this is some kind of cult or totalitarian regime where everyone commenting must only express admiration & support for the views of the great, wise leader. Every individual is entitled to their own opinions & views - just because you don't like it or agree with it doesn't give you the right to be unbelievably vile & disrespectful to the person who has expressed this different perspective. And if you really believe everything that is written in this article, and truly feel comfortable with your perspectives on the world & the issue of doing good being 'selfish' then why get so defensive when you come up against opinions & beliefs that challenge your own?! Doesn't make your beliefs wrong & it doesn't make them right either - they just are & you are entitled to have them, but you've also got to respect the views of others & recognize that every individual thinks differently & has different views and beliefs, even if you don't agree with them.

    36. @concerned1410 expressing opinion is all right. But projecting it on others in the garb of moral good is definitely wicked. why teach others, just go on doing good and set an example. 
      even if you are doing a seemingly good who knows the reason behind your altruism facade. Imagine a wicked person left with innocent children. There is only one sure way to destroy yourself in my opinion and that is accepting any  thing which you have not earned. even in distress accepting more than what you actually need is immoral.
      In my life I have seen lives being destroyed by moral teaching.

    37. @Daryl Mother Theresa's message  “To be able to give, you must have” has a very deep meaning indeed. You cannot play with it. What she meant was earn and then give. Like in all other field there are people in the moral arena too who think themselves very clever. What they do is to urge you to give away all you have earned and they in tern will earn a good name, creditibility and a cut out of what you are giving.
      More than love a person in his/her life needs is dignity. In my opinion if you don not respect somebody you cannot love that person. Love all 
      I do not pay excessive attention to any individual.
      I am concerned with the ideas, concepts and philosophy. These things cannot belong to anybody though they may first seem to get noticed because of some individual's effort or through a discourse between two or more individuals. 
      Humans are fallible . Are not ideas, concept and philosophy fallible too? They need greater caution when being adopted/applied. 
      Therefore my considered opinion is that no amount of "great sayings" around you is going to give you a foolproof way of living your life. Guiding principle for me is - do not get overwhelmed by any thing idea person place, take your time and do what ever keeps you cantered. Clarity of mind is most indispensable.
      Well, by and by you learn. AND ofcourse DISCOURSES are very important. They definitely sharpen your intellect.

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