Success & Prosperity Blog

Threats to Healthy Self-Esteem

low self-esteem
By Randy Gage in Critical Thinking, Success, Prosperity.

Last post we looked at how you might be creating extra challenges for yourself because of underlying worthiness issues.  And I told you that you have to get to the core issue: loving yourself and having a healthy self-esteem. 

We are living in the greatest time in human history.  Yet with all the fantastic advancement of modern society today, I believe our mental health is actually moving backward.  From my work, it appears many more people today suffer from depression, insecurity and low self-esteem than ever before.

There are a few specific things that contribute to this unhealthy situation.  Let’s look at them, so you are better equipped to override them.

The first is the fantasy portrayal of people in plays, movies, books, and especially television.  (And it must be said: the average person in the developed world today watches five to six hours of television.  Daily.)   In the interest of moving the plot along, no one has to ever be bothered with using the bathroom, clipping their toenails, or suffer from moderate to severe plaque psoriasis.  They just flit from adventure to adventure.

And of course in the TV world, every challenge in life is miraculously solved in 22 minutes.  There’s always a caring individual with sage advice to save the day.  You can’t help but watch this and subconsciously feel your own coping skills are inadequate.

The other issue with television fare is the ridiculously idealized version of reality it presents.  This romanticized version of life is unattainable.  Dr. Cliff Huxtable was the dad every guy wanted to be.  Of course the real guy playing the role, was quite a different story.

The other big influence today is social media.  Most people lose sight of the fact that most social media posts are either the “greatest hits” version of that person’s life – or often are actually designed to misdirect and paint an untrue account.

If you followed the social media posts of Robin Williams, Anthony Bourdain, or Kate Spade – you probably thought they had a perfect life with no challenges.  It’s why I never use filters, and often post bleary-eyed pix of me grousing about an early morning flight.  Yes I have a blessed life.  But it ain’t all peaches, moonbeams, and unicorns.  So I want to show that other side as well.

How does this play out?

You woke up late, there was an accident on your route, you spilled your coffee, and now you’re sitting in the dentist’s chair, waiting for your root canal to start.  So you kill time, scrolling through your Instagram feed.  While you’re waiting for Dr. Demento with a drill bit, all of your friends are taking delivery of their new Jag, backstage on Broadway with Hugh Jackman, or frolicking in Ibiza.  And doesn’t your life suck?

A huge step towards positive self-esteem is simply recognizing that your perception that everyone else has a better life than you do is mistaken.  In reality, just the fact you’re online and can read this blog puts you in a radically better quality of life than at least a billion other people on earth.   And those updates your friends are posting of Facebook are not indicative of their actual reality.

Once you recognize the lie of the media and social media portrayal of life, you stop beating yourself up so much.  And can process your days with a more nuanced recognition of reality.   So start there.  Next post we’ll look at some other self-esteem builders. Until then, I’d love to hear your thoughts below.


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10 thoughts on “Threats to Healthy Self-Esteem

  1. jcbjr9455 says:

    I’d suggest there’s another trigger of low self-esteem – the criticism of you (as well as other events, people, and things) by people around you that is seemingly routine. Would welcome your and others’ thoughts on what should acceptable as “not my problem.”

  2. Alpha Baron says:

    How to overcome Bad memories of the past, betrayal or Trauma? While working on my project I saw my ex girlfriends pics on facebook which triggered all bad memories of past.How to handle such memories if they get triggered.Any suggestions?

    1. Concentrate on the present, recognize your endless opportunities for catching up an other girl anytime (be rich for speeding up the process). Look the picture and say this: “I need this girl or someone better”.

  3. In most cases, you can’t just simple defining and event as good or bad. I mean, if you are late from a meeting, you may feel upset for afraid of being fired or loosing the business. But what if one of the business folks on the meeting deciding to make a killing-spree, and you are the only one, who are not there? Then the lateness become your life-saver. You just simply unable to know what benefit comes you from a seemingly bad event (I hope it makes sense). Therefore the only thing you can do is accepting facts and analyzing without emotion. By the way, being upset because of a bad event makes it even worse. You burning your energy for nothing. Use this energy instead to make a new plan. Gonna working amazingly.

  4. Michael Brooman says:

    Agreed.I would also be interested to hear your thoughts on the whole political discussions in terms of how they are distractors from people’s real issues and challenges. So much time and attention is used up in this way, it seems to me, when in reality the real challenges lie elsewhere, far far away as it happens from the world of party politics.

    1. Randy Gage says:

      Have a very special podcast coming in about a week on this! -RG

  5. I’m inspired, and encouraged by this. Thankyou RG! Meditation helps tremendously to activate the divine processes within. Learn to appreciate & understand the divine inner realm is my two cents worth. a prosperous state of mind is everything.

  6. Eric C Smith says:

    very curious how you would say stoicism relates to your work on prosperity. books on stoicism are on my reading list. thank you for your work. Im doing a burning bowl ceremony today.

    1. Randy Gage says:

      You can search that here and on my YouTube channel, because I have definitely delved into Stoicism and how it applies in the prosperity context! -RG

      1. Eric C Smith says:

        sweet thanks! will do


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