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T’was the Night Before Christmas, 2009

Posted By: Randy GageDecember 23, 2009

Ok kids, it’s the special time of year again.  The time when I usually butcher the holiday classic, “T’was the Night Before Christmas.”  But last year I introduced a new twist…

Since we have the blog now, I opened it up and let YOU guys finish the poem.  There were some delightful submissions and a lot of fun was had by all.  So let’s do it again.  And once again a fabulous grand prize will be awarded to the winner!

I’ll start the poem, and you guys come up with the ending.  Whoever comes up with the best finish will win either:

A)    $100,000 cash;
B)    My Viper SRT;
C)    A night of hot steamy sex with me; or,
D)    Honorable mention in the next blog post.

The prize is determined by me, and all decisions are final.  If you’re looking for C, better send pix!  If you want to review last year’s entries, look here:

Now, let’s get to it:

The Night Before Christmas, 2009
(With profound apologies to Clement Clarke Moore and his estate)

‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through the U.S.;
The economy was tanking, and things were a mess.
The stockings were hung by the chimney with care;
Hoping for coal, because the fuel tanks were bare.

The government health care plan wasn’t looking like a winner;
Resembling nine wolves and a sheep, voting on what’s for dinner.
The media had all the meaty issues it could handle;
Keeping their focus on the Tiger sex scandal.

When out on the lawn, arose such a racket;

And now dear reader, the rest is up to you…

-RG

P.S.  I wish you a joyous holiday season filled with good friends, happy reunions, and stimulating conversations - and a New Year of hope, healing, and highest good.   However in light of the new FTC policy, please note the following conditions:

The holiday greeting and wishes for a Happy New Year contained in this blog are extended from Randy Gage ("Wishor”), to you (“Recipient”), subject to the following terms and conditions:

This greeting is extended without obligation, implied or implicit, best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, politically correct, gender neutral, celebration of the secular winter solstice holiday only. Any similarities to religious and/or national holidays are purely coincidental.

This greeting may be accepted in the context of the traditions of the religious beliefs of your choice, or secular beliefs of your choice, regardless of sexual orientation or operating system preference. However, such acceptance by the recipient does not imply any endorsements or consents by the Wishor.

My wishes for your emotional state, financial success, and freedom from disease apply to the generally accepted calendar year 2010. Any other calendars of choice from other cultures or sects are subject to availability.

This greeting is subject to further clarification or withdrawal, is revocable at the sole discretion of the Wishor, and is non transferable. The Wishor implies no promise to actually implement any of the wishes. The extent of the holiday spirit experienced will be determined by the effort recipient puts into it. The claims described are for illustration purposes only. Your results may differ. These statements have not been approved by the FDA. This greeting is void where prohibited by law.

“Christmas” “God” and “Jesus” are registered trademarks of the Amway Corporation; all rights reserved.

83 comments on “T’was the Night Before Christmas, 2009”

  1. Hi Randy! Thanks for the hilarious satire on the FTC regs! LOL 🙂 Please note: attribution of this post is not authorized and any attempt to link my comments to me, my family, any of my facebook friends or twitter followers will be disavowed. In such a egregious situation I will take any and all actions necessary to preserve and protect whatever is left of my personal dignity. But I agree with you totally Hahahaha 🙂 Merry whatever-it-is we're allowed to call it. Kent

  2. You’re always besides us and fill our hearts all the best feeling as well as wisdom. Thanks for what you are doing. Wishing you all the best to your life. Merry Christmas & Happy New Year to Randy! Love.

  3. ...when out on the lawn there arose such a racket,
    I shook with excitement and reached for a jacket.
    I looked out the window but saw nothing there,
    I think old St. Nick must be around here somewhere.

    I ran out the door to see my lawn's blanket of white,
    the street lights were dim, there was no one in sight.
    I heard a rustling in the trees nearby,
    so I lifted my head and my eyes toward the sky.

    The sound that I heard was hilarious, sir,
    it was old St. Nick caught in the tall fir!
    The sled was all tangled, the deer ran amuck,
    to my surprise, albeit relief, here came the fire truck!

    We lifted them up and out of the tree ,
    inside they came for a cup of hot tea.
    The jolly man thanked me for saving the night
    then he wiped off his chin and kissed me good night.

    I heard the old man sing with glee and delight,
    Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good night!

  4. When out on the lawn, arose such a racket;
    I jumped for my 9mm, thought I heard a crack-head.
    Away to the peep-hole I looked through and through;
    Tore open the door to get a better view.

    The moon was New and street lamps above, casting strange shadows array;
    From around the house in the corner of my eye, saw a hurried fellow fly by.
    I must go investigate, for I must know, why.. or who;
    Oh wait, thats just the neighbor the Jew.

    His foot prints from my front lawn, I cursed and I fussed;
    That bastard, so stupid, Why? what was his just.
    Went back to my door confused and dischevelled, he seemed such a twit;
    Where upon the top step he had mysteriously left a great gift.

    So I breathed in relief, for my neighbor he's new;
    With this economey so uneasy I would have never knew.
    His kindness and openess for if he had been caught;
    Between us just strangers, there we would have fought.

    A gift from a neighbor/a stranger it's true;
    He opened his heart to someone he never knew.
    My heart filled with joy, so I put the 9mm away;
    I sat aside my differences for tomorrow would dawn a new day.

    *I would just like to say I myself am Agnostic. My mother converted to Judaism 13 years ago before marying her last husband and giving birth to my little brother, who is of course Jewish. I have nothing against the Jewish faith, and did not mean to imply anything by the above.

    Happy Holidays to all, and to all a good night!

    😉 Jamie

  5. Dear Randy

    HAPPY CHRISTMAS! AND I WISH FOR YOU THESE 4 WONDERFULL ITEMS
    A) $100,000 cash;
    B) My Viper SRT;
    C) A night of hot steamy sex with me; or,
    D) Honorable mention in the next blog post

    CHEERS

    MOJGAN

  6. …when out on the lawn there arose such a racket,
    Obama & Santa were holding a packet,
    A ho ho ho and a yes we can
    Said Santa the white man and the man with a tan

    We'll do it together, make everything right,
    What happened next, gave me a fright
    Out of the darkness the Grinch appeared
    Laughing & joking, he tugged Santas beard

    There was no letting go, the Grinch held on tight,
    "Halt" said Obama, " Please cease this fight",
    Then out of the dark 2 Bushes appear
    George seniour & junior, spreading good cheer

    We all are alike, no matter our skin,
    You just have to look to the heart within
    And right before them landed a dove,
    Spreading the spirit of peace and love

    Out on the lawn, no longer a racket,
    They all stood together and opened the pakket
    When seeing it's contents, eyes shining bright,
    They were joined as one, that Christmas night.

  7. When out on the lawn there arose such a racket....
    Did the music remind me of old Hinge and Bracket?
    I ran to the window..it was foggy...not clear...
    Cant they leave me alone at this time of year..?

    Everyone jolly....eating and shopping
    Dont bother me or call I wont be stopping
    To listen to your cheer or try to be funny
    I am going to bed to dream of my money....

    But before I could move the room it felt cold
    I wanted to move but a voice said be told
    Take a look at yourself and the way that you think
    Be positive..be well otherwise you will sink

    I dont understand you..I have enough to get by
    I want you to go..you are making me cry
    Enough to get by dont make me laugh
    What about living..an adventure..go see a giraffe

    Those things arent for me not at this stage
    I think you should start to read Randy Gage.
    Can he change Christmas can he give me wealth
    He can show you how..but you do it yourself.

    It starts in your mind ..throw out all the doubt
    Believe in yourself..dance sing and shout
    Get out on the lawn and join in the racket
    They're all millionaires..theyre worth quite a packet....

    I listened to Randy a long time ago
    I changed my lifestyle and dispelled all the woe
    Being successfull I am so full of cheer
    I had to stop by and wish you Happy Christmas
    and avery Prosperous New Year......

    Have a great time Randy.....love Angie xxx

  8. The Night Before Christmas, 2009
    (With profound apologies to Clement Clarke Moore and his estate)

    ‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through the U.S.;
    The economy was tanking, and things were a mess.
    The stockings were hung by the chimney with care;
    Hoping for coal, because the fuel tanks were bare.

    The government health care plan wasn’t looking like a winner;
    Resembling nine wolves and a sheep, voting on what’s for dinner.
    The media had all the meaty issues it could handle;
    Keeping their focus on the Tiger sex scandal.

    When out on the lawn, arose such a racket;
    'Tis the deafman, fighting the ugly collectivisms.
    Libertarianism beating in 'is heart;
    as he sprays the Light of Libertarianisms to the people.

    And the forces of collectivisms falls before the onslaught;
    As the people awaken to the lies of collectivisms.
    And begins their new lives in the light of Libertarianism;
    And a new glory of Libertarianisms shone on a planet of freedom-loving people.

  9. considering my vocation, I had to post an entry here even though it's not a true entry into this contest - this version was written by my contest buddy Hope, ENJOY!:

    twas the night before christmas
    and all through the house
    the only critter stirring was me
    and not even the mouse

    the stockings were hung by the chimney with care
    filled to the brim with prize winnings fair
    the children were nestled all snugs in their beds
    while visions of what mommy would win danced in their heads

    and me in my jamas and on the lap top
    i had settled down to do those last minute contest top ups
    when out of the lawn there arose such a clatter
    i sprung from my chair to see what was the matter

    away to the window i flew like a flash
    tore open the shutters and threw up the sash
    what to my wondering eyes did appear
    a miniature sleigh and 8 reindeer

    the driver of course had to be st nick
    cause he looked at me and winked
    said, 'go to bed girl, contests can wait
    next year will be many more you can partake'

    'go get some rest, take it easy on your hands
    dream of assorted goodies and exotic lands
    from monthlies, to weeklies, dailies and more
    but remember...you can't win them all'

    but know that you can't win if you don't enter
    work at it hard and you will be a mentor
    to help others to win as you will too
    merry christmas to you and all contestors afoot!

  10. When out on the lawn, arose such a racket;
    A guy in Taiwan read and watch in his black jacket!
    He wanted to join this intellectual chat;
    And the muse in him runs like a back street rat

    Twas the night before Christmas and he's not in U.S.;
    A million miles apart yet his world were also a mess.
    He may speak a different language and have a different name;
    but the connection came and was as surreal as a virtual game.

    The people is all crying for help and looking for hope;
    And for ways, ideas and methods to cope;
    How can we break free from this deteriorating norms;
    So we can LIVE OUT OUR LIFE freely in whatever forms!

    The truth is really the same here, there and anywhere;

    So by all means do share, care or simply be aware;

    Because Twas the night before Christmas everywhere!

  11. When out on the lawn, arose such a racket;
    It was Gage who was saying, the formula he did crack it,
    Don't just grind away doing your 9 to 5,
    For this was the worst way to try and stay alive.

    Think positive, stand tall, do not live in distress,
    We have the best way to achieve your success,
    With belief and strong will we can show you the way,
    To turn bad fortune as you see it into pay day,

    Join us in our venture of well being and health
    Join us in our venture of creating great wealth,
    Suck it up and deliver your story with pride,
    for if you decide to join us we will stand by your side,

    We will show you our way of leverage and teaching,
    Of how one person can have a business far reaching,
    And earn while they sleep from places afar,
    While they sleep in a warm bed under their lucky star.

    Do not fear our story as it is proven to be true,
    And on the night before Christmas it can happen for you!

  12. There was Randy Gage
    In a brand new jacket

    Jingle Bell earrings
    And a flashing light tie
    It left me speechless
    Oh my, what a guy

    He decked out his Bentley
    And filled it with toys
    Of course model cars
    For the girls and the boys

    He knew the adults
    Needed much more
    Safe Is the New Risky
    By their front door

    As Randy road off
    On this Christmas Eve
    I could hear him shout
    It made me believe

    Ho! Ho! Ho!
    Cash Flow class it is right
    Happy Holidays to all
    And to all a goodnight!

  13. ROTFLMAO! This is the best post I have read this year!

    When out on the lawn, arose such a racket;
    ....the've come for my house, I'll just have to pack it.
    Off to the airport I go in a tear,
    Upon my return, my house not there.

    I've worked all my life for someone not me,
    Just to be flushed like a bowl full of pee.
    No options, no future they hoped I would see,
    but fools that they are there them and not me.

    To start my own biz in times such a mess,
    what was I thinking? of only success!
    The past two years I've often been stumped,
    if not for my family, I'd surely have jumped.

    To give to my family is my only goal,
    but old Uncle Sam gives nothing but coal.
    So it's just up to me to grow such a tree,
    I'll make it I'm sure, you'll see you'll see!

    I may lose my house to the thieves in the night,
    but my family is stronger, due to this plight.
    We'll find a new house if that's what we must,
    to lay down our bones, and not let them rust.

    To stay in the game is the way to succeed,
    and screw all the bankers ... there so full of greed.
    Politicians of the day are so fricking blind,
    they do what they must to save their behind.

    But surprise to them all they'll find Christmas day,
    there's a movement within that wants it our way!
    To grow for our family is all that we crave,
    to sick it to them is the way we behave.

    We grow by the masses and to their surprise,
    they soon will ask for a fair compromise.
    But they just offer volume to our issues at heart,
    but we stick to our guns ... we want a fresh start!

    Joe Vizi

  14. Randy, can't u go to the government and have a few words, make them vote this bill down? I know u can do it, u just have to look deep down inside, and let the Jedi knight out!

  15. ‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through the U.S.;
    The economy was tanking, and things were a mess.
    The stockings were hung by the chimney with care;
    Hoping for coal, because the fuel tanks were bare.

    The government health care plan wasn’t looking like a winner;
    Resembling nine wolves and a sheep, voting on what’s for dinner.
    The media had all the meaty issues it could handle;
    Keeping their focus on the Tiger sex scandal.

    When out on the lawn, arose such a racket;
    Santa dashed to the window hoping to tract it.
    The racket was Serena’s and the point was hers too,
    After choking an umpire who “had the wrong view”.

    Santa looked at his list to check nice and naughty.
    The nice list was not large, the other not paltry.
    Santa felt hopey changy at the dawn of the year,
    but t’was no longer true now that evening was near.

    Sure, Sully had landed his plane in the waters,
    and he saw Obama, his wife and his daughters.
    But what began with such promise soon turned to mere ash
    With Citibank and Chrysler both spending our cash.

    Santa’s good list got lighter – though you’d better not pout –
    When Jackson and Swayze both did dance out
    Farrah, Soupy and Teddy went thru the same door
    And no “rest of the story” will we hear any more.

    With those giants gone, there’s always new buzz.
    Kanye wasn’t so swift, but Taylor sure was.
    Balloon boy, gate crashers and the Nobel Peace Prize,
    The good and the bad will pass through our lives

    Our friend Santa always makes two lists every year,
    To find boys and girls, both naughty and dear.
    But we must have faith he will do his job well.
    Even more so to know that we will excel.

    Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night.

  16. HAHAHA
    thanks for the best Christmas Laugh ever dear!!
    I´ll pass it on to the Amway people in my network 😉

    Before I enter the competition, please tell me the chance-% og the C (not especially interested in the other prizes 😉

    Wishing all of you wonderful holidays, and that the new year may be your best EVER!!!

    Warm Networking regards,
    Tina

  17. I loved: “Christmas” “God” and “Jesus” are registered trademarks of the Amway Corporation; all rights reserved.

    Thanks for the morning laugh. :o)

  18. Hey Randy Claus! Here's mine.....
    =====
    When out on the lawn there arose such a racket!
    The herd's cry had changed from "I like it!" to "I lack it!"

    Scowling and howling, their voices were bitter.
    "I'm entitled to win (even though I'm a quitter)."

    Then what to my wondering eyes should appear
    But a handsome young man who said "you have nothing to fear!"

    "You create your own world," he said with a smile
    "I speak the truth, without malice or guile."

    "Problems are opportunities disguised in work clothes.
    Your success is as plain as the front of your nose!"

    But the herd wouldn't listen -- they hooted and booed.
    (And some of their remarks were downright rude.)

    But the man wasn't shaken; he showed no dismay.
    "A few people are listening, and that makes my day!"

    As he hopped in his Viper and roared out of sight,
    He promised one and all, "The future is bright!"

    Then he added a wish, one that he held dear:
    "Prosperity to all, and to all a great year!"
    =====
    Wishing you and all your friends the happiest of holidays, Randy!
    jim

  19. The Night Before Christmas, 2009
    (With profound apologies to Clement Clarke Moore and his estate)

    ‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through the U.S.;
    The economy was tanking, and things were a mess.
    The stockings were hung by the chimney with care;
    Hoping for coal, because the fuel tanks were bare.

    The government health care plan wasn’t looking like a winner;
    Resembling nine wolves and a sheep, voting on what’s for dinner.
    The media had all the meaty issues it could handle;
    Keeping their focus on the Tiger sex scandal.

    When out on the White House lawn, there arose such a racket;
    All the businessmen and thinkers had brought a straight jacket.
    For every politician in Washington land;
    So we could attend to the real issues at hand.

    This Christmas would be different with real people in charge;
    While America cheered for real change in the cards.
    The liberal media was shut down for good;
    While channels of prosperity were put where they stood.

    First on the agenda was a term limit vote
    It passed 100% and that's all she wrote
    One and you're done that what the law said
    Politicians were ousted with faces of red

    Next we tried them for treason, something not heard in a while
    All their big payoffs were brought up at the trial
    Not one of them made it, all corrupt you see;
    There was the biggest hanging ever on national TV.

    Everyone got the picture, the people were back;
    And it's your own damn fault, if you're living in lack.
    People looking for handouts, we told to go to hell;
    That was no longer an option, we took care of ourselves.

    Capitalism ruled in the country once again;
    And jobs weren't farmed out to some foreign land.
    The corruption was gone, the country was free;
    Bailouts were over, the markets at peace.

    America was back and old laws were repealed;
    This change was good and the nation was healed.
    All this seems a little too good to be true;
    But hey this is Christmas it's what I want don't you.

    I also want the 100 grand Mr. Gage;
    I think that my poem will be all the rage.
    I'm a generous man living the dream;
    100 grand would really make me sing.

    So I will leave all my contact info for you;
    Then my christmas wish can really come true.
    The check can be sent to the address below;
    And my life will sure change with all of that dough.

    Sam Patton
    78 Meadow Ridge Dr.
    Fort Valley, GA 31030
    478-827-1587
    [email protected]

  20. Universe provide capital for my new business venture which will impact many small business owners all over the Planet Earth,

    Universe, Universe, Universe provide the solution.. provide it quickly because you know what it is worth.

    It will save many businesses, families from despair,

    Impacting and improving visions and mental repair.

    It's all about thought, the power to believe.

    Believe, Believe, Believe with all your abilities.

    The Universe will provide the answer immediately.

  21. when out on the lawn there arose such a racket
    I lept from my bed, grabbing boots and a jacket,

    and out on each neighbors lawn a banker or two
    each carrying a hammer, sign and a kazoo,

    singing songs and posting signs on every door
    and the bankers did more,

    by removing the credit of each boy and girl
    raising interest rates, and compounding debt all in a whirl,

    they jumped in their limos, drinks they were pouring
    and three cheers, 'hurray out finest day', while neighbors a snoring,

    and I heard them exclaim as they drove out of sight
    happy foreclosure to all and to all a good night

  22. When out on the lawn, arose such a racket;
    As Santa arrived loudly wearing a full metal jacket.

    A cloud of coal dust surrounded him and he was awful smelly
    He had a broad dirty face and a verynlarge flabby beer belly

    Gripping a large bulging sack of coal to which he held tightly
    With his right hand then gave me the finger, while smiling mightily

    With a maniacal laugh he then sprang into his BMW, yelling “bye sucker”
    And away he drove I heard him exclaim, “climate change my ass, bye sucker”

  23. ‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through the U.S.;
    The economy was tanking, and things were a mess.
    The stockings were hung by the chimney with care;
    Hoping for coal, because the fuel tanks were bare.

    The government health care plan wasn’t looking like a winner;
    Resembling nine wolves and a sheep, voting on what’s for dinner.
    The media had all the meaty issues it could handle;
    Keeping their focus on the Tiger sex scandal.

    When out on the lawn, arose such a racket;
    Ted Kennedy left his meatsuit & The Jackson's sold Michael's Jacket.
    Santa Claus was instructed to deliver only Chinese goods;
    additional Government cheese spread through middle-class hoods.

    The messiah of prosperity added a shiny new Viper to his fleet;
    fundamentalists became infuriated...unable to afford shoes on their feet.
    Pigs could now fly and the flu boosted vaccine sales worldwide;
    43 Trillion reasons why the USA stimulated debt, yet paper bonds died.

    Fear-porn captivated minds every night, 'twas the night before christmas;
    anti-depressant pills, unpaid bills, and plenty of sugar for all - delicious!
    A few scrooges said 'humbug' to all this nonsense, living outside the rat-race;
    their proposition of what's to come was magnificent, as if touched by God's grace.

    'Twas the night before christmas and two types of people celebrated;
    the disciples prosperity & mingled-minds that are media-orchestrated.
    Many went to church that evening to pray to a God that was a jealous fuhrer;
    crying about their lack and poverty, ill-health, and were handed a mirror...

    'Twas the night before christmas and Christ had arrived from the past;
    instructed to look in the mirror, each person gave up victomhood at last!
    Obama was pleased, we didn't have to sell war to pay off debt anymore;
    the medical community rejoiced, patients health actually became restored.

    Newspapers and media covered the event as a catastrophe of major proportions;
    it had to have been an epidemic of delusion, this anomaly was a distortion!
    'Twas the night before christmas and nobody read the propaganda the media served;
    the miracle of full-responsibility gave every man and woman what they deserved.

    Dozens of Vipers and other exotic vehicles were delivered to homes by Mr. Claus;
    the opportunity to be displaced became a nudge to be your own boss.
    A million new millionaire's were birthed into the world from the ashes of defeat;
    perhaps it was even the one who is currently sitting in your seat!

    'Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house...
    nobody believed any longer that they should live as poor as a church mouse.
    everyone realized that money DOES grow on trees, and YES it is true;
    you're always at the scene of the crime, the center of your Universe is YOU!

    Coals were burning, the snow flakes dumped all over the midwest;
    yet somehow everyone knew that these times were in fact the very best!
    Executives working paper-hat jobs handed over their funds and got robbed;
    looked within themselves before giving it one last sob.

    Then a roar of laughter erupted throughout the ethers, all was indeed well;
    a shift of attention was placed on ushering in heaven on Earth instead of hell.
    The blame-game wasn't played after dinner and many refused to drink the 'spirits';
    the alarm sirens of fear blasted out through the airwaves, yet no one could hear it.

    Tithes flooded the post office and CNN reported a huge vacuum-like black hole;
    like a whirlpool, the collective release of victimhood stole the whole show.
    'Twas the last night before Christmas that the ghost of christmas past appeared;
    at last, the 'end of the world' prophesied meant the end of the fear!

    The fallen world sank, false sciences were scrutinized to their demise;
    grandpa and grandma caught the evening news yelling, 'lies, lies, lies!'
    People gave up their dis-eases and embraced prosperity instead;
    'Twas the night before Christmas and it was all thoughts in our head.

    The end.

  24. Randy...explain your "probably not" in today's email? This does not sound anything like the messages that are instilled in us each day.....did you write that?..."probably not"..

    Also...how about adding a selection of emoticons to the blog.
    Gloria

  25. When out on the lawn, arose such a racket,
    I sprang from the bed, stumbled and fell over a packet;

    Away to the stairway I flew very driven,
    Sometimes all of our thoughts are misgiven;

    The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow,
    Gave white light to objects below;

    When, what did appear to my wondering eyes and forces,
    But a new Viper SRT, and six hundred horses!

    With a tall, sexy driver, so lively and quick,
    I knew in a moment it must be St. Nick;

    More rapid than rock stars his coursers they came,
    And he tweeted, and blogged, and called them by name;

    "Now, Dasher! now, Dancer! now, Prancer and Vixen!
    On, Comet! on Cupid! on, Donder and Blitzen!

    Tonight's the night! Let's live it up!
    Go out and smash it! Fill up your cup!"

    As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,
    When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky,

    It was like lightning, Everybody was frightening,
    And the music was soothing, And they all started grooving!

    And then, global warming, I heard on the web,
    The prancing and pawing of each little ebb;

    As I drew in my head, and was turning around,
    Down the chimney St. Nicholas came with a bound;

    He was dressed all in Prada...hot, sticky and sweet,
    from his head to his feet.

    A bundle of toys he had flung on his back,
    Cars, watches, i-phones, gadgets, apps & a mac;

    His eyes -- how they twinkled! They are the mirror of the soul,
    Giving and receiving...hopefully not coal!

    His mouth was drawn up like a bow, a spark,
    sometimes resembling a smiling great white shark;

    The stump of a spoon he held tight in his teeth,
    because there is no spoon;

    He was athletic and trim, a serious baseball player,
    And I was inspired when I saw him, truly multi-layer;

    A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,
    Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread;

    He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work with clarity,
    Helping people to transform self-limiting beliefs into self-fulfilling breakthroughs to achieve their dreams and prosperity.

    And pausing a moment, cause sometimes we don't really notice, he reflected,
    And giving a nod, all was connected.

    He sprang to his Viper SRT, to his team gave a cue,
    You can shine a little light on everything around you;

    But I heard him exclaim, ere he flew to Wisconsin,
    "Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night!"

  26. From all my heart, I wish you a Merry Christmas , Randy!

    I express my deepest appreciation for all inspiration and informal spiritual guidance you provided me with from pages of your books and this blog.
    Keep the fire of hope buring inside the hearts of ones who are in need of it !

  27. When out on the lawn, arose such a racket;

    An industry becoming, the answer for masses.
    It started with 1, then 2, then 4, it soon became clear
    There was room for much more.

    Change is hard, resistance is stiff
    But soon people will rejoice with this new christmas gift
    Hope and Freedom are much more than dreams
    It’s a life worth living, A soul gifting thing.

    With gratitude and blessings all thru the land
    A new kind of peace was truly at hand
    Prosperity was turning and the people had vision
    Not even Santa could imagine this new found provision.

    It cuts to the core, and gets to the chase.
    This networking thing is for the whole human race.
    So off to the new year and on thru the ages
    This distribution time is just in the beginning stages.

    I finish with a smile and laughter to boot, for my
    Mind races as I see Santa coming thru the shoot
    Big fat boots and big fat belly. He networked all night
    And now he is hear, Networking with me over cookies
    And good cheer.

    Travis Wolf
    16305 bates cove
    Pflugerville,tx 78660

  28. The Night Before Christmas, 2009
    (With profound apologies to Clement Clarke Moore and his estate)

    ‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through the U.S.;
    The economy was tanking, and things were a mess.
    The stockings were hung by the chimney with care;
    Hoping for coal, because the fuel tanks were bare.

    The government health care plan wasn’t looking like a winner;
    Resembling nine wolves and a sheep, voting on what’s for dinner.
    The media had all the meaty issues it could handle;
    Keeping their focus on the Tiger sex scandal.

    When out on the lawn, arose such a racket;
    I sprang from my KenkoAire™ and threw on my jacket.
    Away to the sun deck I stumbled and fell,
    Threw open the front doors and screamed, "What the hell…!"

    Clouds covered the moon and I couldn't see shit,
    And being night-blind I figured I'd quit.
    When what to my wondering eyes should be there,
    But an MLM Rock Star— the one with no hair.

    He drove up in his Bentley, (No, not the Arnage)
    And I knew in a moment, "That's Randy Gage.
    And he wasn't alone, by the dozens they came,
    And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name!

    "Now Wesley! now, Billy! now, Eli and Avigail,
    On Matt, on Juan Carlos, on Alex and Yael!
    To the top of the Quadra-Plan! to the top of them all!
    Now duplicate, duplicate, duplicate all!"

    As dry teams that before the Miami Hurricane's fly,
    When they meet with an objection, pass on the fly.
    So all round my condo the coursers they flew,
    With Randy, his softball team and Eric Worre too.

    And then, in a twinkling, I heard from inside,
    A great buzz and excitement impossible to hide
    I turned going in just to give them a greeting.
    There he was in my living room conducting a meeting!

    He was dressed custom-made from his neck to his toes,
    My annual income could be spent on those clothes!
    On my 42-inch plasma a DVD played.
    And everyone was sharing 'bout the money they'd made.

    His eyes-how they twinkled! his dimples how merry!
    His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry!
    His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,
    And the gleam off his head set the whole room aglow.

    A Patek Philippe gleamed from under his sleeve,
    He was so mesmerizing no one wanted to leave.
    He spoke of prosperity, freedom and wealth,
    And he boasted with pride how he'd restored his health.

    He was tall, dark & handsome like a Rivendell Elf.
    And I was saddened by comparing him to myself!
    But a wink of his eye and a tilt of his head,
    Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread.

    His encouraging words were all about work,
    He built my belief, then turned with a jerk.
    And laying an application on the table before,
    "Sign here," he told me, then flew out the door!

    He sprang to his Bentley, to his team gave a whistle,
    And away they all flew like the down of a thistle.
    But I heard him exclaim, ‘ere he drove out of sight,
    "Residual income for all, and to all a good-night!"

    w/Love and deepest apologies— John Milton

  29. Have an eggnog and lighten up a little. Merry Christmas!

    Have to think about the emoticons. Think I prefer a little more intelligent conversation that just smiley faces and frowns.

    -RG

  30. The Night Before Christmas, 2009
    (With profound apologies to Clement Clarke Moore and his estate)
    ‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through the U.S.;
    The economy was tanking, and things were a mess.
    The stockings were hung by the chimney with care;
    Hoping for coal, because the fuel tanks were bare.
    The government health care plan wasn’t looking like a winner;
    Resembling nine wolves and a sheep, voting on what’s for dinner.
    The media had all the meaty issues it could handle;
    Keeping their focus on the Tiger sex scandal.

    When out on the lawn, arose such a racket;
    I wasn’t sure what I saw so I thought I should attack it.

    I looked up, I looked down and thought could this be a friend?
    Or is what was coming would cause the end.

    Then I realized the man I saw could only serve four.
    After that I could put his picture in a drawer.

    On Dancer, on Prancer on Rudolph on Blitzen.
    Only 3 years left and we’ll again be Ritzen.

  31. ... went out on the lawn there arose such a racket,
    with all us screwed by this outlandish packet.

    Screaming and running;
    is there a doctor in'THE HOUSE'? Not a sign of one.
    Though the looters are humming as drunk as a Souse.

    So Santa babe, I'll remedy this pain with a dose of "Ayn Rand,"

    Dream BIG and lots of blessings,
    Leslie
    NYC

  32. I thought about entering this contest and I am sure I could come up with some cutting remarks about how the government is treating us all so badly and the recession is driving most of my friends into bankruptcy but then I thought again. I would so much rather focus on the things that truly matter to me this year.
    My family, my friends, and the love we all have for each other. Talking on the phone with my 83 year old grandmother, having a positive and upbeat conversation with my mother (a rarity there), the grandma across the street bringing over Diet Sprite because she remembered I like Sprite (not diet but whatever, she was thinking of me), my daughter who hugs me for no other reason than because she loves her mom. Those are the things that matter right this moment. Not the government or the climate or the banks. Today, right this moment the people in my life are more important than anything else.
    Have a wonderful, safe, full of love and peace holiday everyone!

  33. The Night Before Christmas, 2009
    (With profound apologies to Clement Clarke Moore and his estate)

    ‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through the U.S.;
    The economy was tanking, and things were a mess.
    The stockings were hung by the chimney with care;
    Hoping for coal, because the fuel tanks were bare.

    The government health care plan wasn’t looking like a winner;
    Resembling nine wolves and a sheep, voting on what’s for dinner.
    The media had all the meaty issues it could handle;
    Keeping their focus on the Tiger sex scandal.

    When out on the lawn, arose such a racket;
    I remember the price of my diamond wallet.‎
    Close your eyes, count from ten to one, at once;‎
    Cheers! You’re rich, right? Do it every month.‎

    Hum, it’s not an amazing test, understood?‎
    I wanna just our happiness, that’s good.‎
    What’s coming up in New Year? No matter!‎
    because our mind is so rich, that’s better.‎

    People say:” happy New Year”. For what?‎
    To change our attitude, like acrack shot.‎
    Great! In your dream you want to buy a bay;‎
    Well, work on your sub-consciousness, that’s the way.‎

    Believe yourself, it’s your turn to create your kingdom world;‎
    Oh lord, don’t hesitate, you know the value of time? It’s gold.‎
    Go ahead, enjoy now, dance more, and listen to your heart-beat;‎
    How long it takes to achieve your vision? You’re right. Just a bit.‎

  34. the night before christmas i see a wide river with diamonds so i walk through the river the river is not deep but very long and as i keep walking every diamond shines diffrent ,every diamond has a diffrent color,they are so beautifull only shining for me,i do not pick them up but i keep walking and when i finally reach the end of the river there is my sweethaert standing with a suitcase with 1milion dollars ,a limusine and a case full of diamonds to welcome me,this is my kind of night before christmas. diamondkisses corinne-spain

  35. The Night Before Christmas, 2009
    (With profound apologies to Clement Clarke Moore and his estate)

    ‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through the U.S.;
    The economy was tanking, and things were a mess.
    The stockings were hung by the chimney with care;
    Hoping for coal, because the fuel tanks were bare.

    The government health care plan wasn’t looking like a winner;
    Resembling nine wolves and a sheep, voting on what’s for dinner.
    The media had all the meaty issues it could handle;
    Keeping their focus on the Tiger sex scandal.

    When out on the lawn, arose such a racket;
    Twas Miss Elin, burning 17 pictures of hoochies wearing nothing but the Tiger's Green Jacket.

    All people wanted, was America to have CHANGE
    they didn't do their homework, and now they feel strange.
    Too many years later, NOW we want to audit the FED????
    Sorry you silly voter, they took all your bread!!

    Up in the skies, the CEO's still getting bonuses,
    You think it's crazy? You voted for "HIM" you crybaby chingones!
    They still came back and proclaimed, "Please Sir, may I have another?"
    Next time use lube, cause "He" just gave YOU another!

    All the President's men, behind the iron curtain,
    Meanwhile, you and the old lady are claiming you're really hurtin.
    We'll take Mexico, Canada, US of A.....
    Let's all unite and spend EURO'S one day!

    Turn on the tube and what do you see?
    Mindless entertainment, you're so hooked on "GLEE."
    The man is coming in his red suit,
    he's got lots of bills for ya,
    to pay for those new work boots.

    "On Palin, on Britney, On Michael, On Lindsay...
    Merry Christmas to all.....
    Santa wants to tell you,
    You should have voted for RON PAUL!!!!!"

    (Thanks for letting me vent in Spanglish.)
    Cristina

  36. such a racket! alarms went off in all of our minds
    our right brains came over to our lefts with out any reigns.
    and now and now and now our dreams and the visions are vibrant in the land and air and milky way, we take iron fisted responsibility for our actions and thoughts and all is right in the world.

  37. 'Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house
    Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse.

    They rested in peace as they knew after all
    Things usually work out to the benefit of all.

    Their energy was focused, they took due care
    To make sure they were centered;
    Commitment to inner peace was there.

    Their intentions were clear; they took time to think; And,
    wrote down those desires in clear black ink.

    And most of all they rested knowing they had support;
    Whenever they asked, people came forth.

    So I sit pen to paper and wish you all
    a blessed season of light
    and the most wonderful New Year's of all!

    All the best to you and yours,

    Karen Valencic

  38. With a big smile and thanks to all, I wish everyone "Happy Healthy Holidays and a fantastic year ahead!!!

    I will put my vote in for the positive poetry, or comments, that is, if my vote counts!!! 🙂

  39. Twas The Night Before Christmas ... again!

    ‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through the U.S.;
    The economy was tanking, and things were a mess.

    The stockings were hung by the chimney with care;
    Hoping for coal, because the fuel tanks were bare.

    The government health care plan wasn’t looking like a winner;
    Resembling nine wolves and a sheep, voting on what’s for dinner.

    The media had all the meaty issues it could handle;
    Keeping their focus on the Tiger sex scandal.

    When out on the lawn, there arose such a racket;
    (A man in a red suit, from a much higher tax bracket!)

    So straight to the window I ran in a hurry;
    And I peeked – for I had to, through all of my worry

    When I finally saw him, I recognized the sage;
    It was … “Wait – it couldn’t be! … yes – twas RANDY GAGE!”

    I got all excited and started to stutter;
    My palms became sweaty and my heart was a-flutter.

    He said, “Hello Dear One, I bring you kind greetings”;
    “You’ve been a loyal student, it was time for our meeting.”

    “You’ve dreamed, you’ve envisioned, you’ve aligned with your brilliance”;
    It was you that brought me here, due to all your resilliance!

    I love how you’ve worked on controlling your thoughts;
    And become very positive, just the way that I’ve taught!

    The world may look scary and grim to the masses;
    But you’re right on track to join the great upper-classes!

    So I’ve brought you a gift in this happiest of seasons;
    And you truly have earned it - for so many reasons

    This is only a token of the wealth you deserve;
    So consider it a down payment in your unending reserves.

    There will be much more coming as you expand expectations;
    The world is your oyster, your canvas, your creation.

    And I see you’ve discovered that life’s meant to be fun!;
    Not just for the lucky, but for each and every one.

    So I brought you this check for a cool hundred grand;
    Delivered by yours truly … like the Universe planned!

    You know you’ve been asking for more prosperity;
    Bet you never imagined it would be delivered by … ME!

    Now use it toward greatness and make sure you enjoy it;
    Oh yes, and spend wisely … be sure to employ it!

    This is your proof of the Law of Attraction;
    But remember the next step is … you must take some action!

    And Dear, if you’re wondering what this is doing for me;
    I’m tithing my millions, quite generously!

    I have plenty of money – but it needs circulation;
    And with this visit finished – I am off on vacation!

    Now I bid you farewell, this sleigh’s not as fast my Viper;
    I’ve still far to travel and the reindeer are hyper.

    So I leave you with wishes of abundance and cheer;
    I can hardly wait to see just what you do with this year!

    Wishing you many rich blessings in the coming year and always!!!

    KimbraLee =)

  40. When out on the lawn, arose such a racket;
    Pelosi and Reid were looking at my car, trying to tax it.
    I ran to my desk and hid my checkbook in a flash;
    I yelled to mama, “quick, hide all our cash”.

    When what to my wondering eyes should appear;
    But an opportunity for freedom if I bust my ass for a year.
    I needed some training, a mentor and quick;
    Research led me to a bald guy in Florida who is kind of slick.

    Trying to soar with the eagles and not be so lame;
    He prods and pushes but does not know my name.
    Now affirm, now mantra, now market don’t sell;
    Wear a button or sticker and end in MLM hell!

    To the top of the comp plan, now climb that wall!
    Two a day for freedom, now that is all!
    As dry leaves before the wild hurricane fly;
    When I meet a new obstacle, I mount to the sky.

    I speak not a word and go straight to my work;
    Sometimes my wife thinks I’m some kind of jerk.
    But each day freedom gets closer and continue to grow;
    All from the seeds that Rohn once did sow.

    Gage has shown the reward of true hustle;
    And to share an opportunity does not take much muscle.
    But I heard him exclaim as he drove a Viper out of sight;
    “Believe in yourself and to all a prosperous night!”

    Merry Christmas RG, thanks for the gifts all year.

  41. The night before Christamis and there was not a sound in the house until old saint nick came in and still everybody was sound a sleep. the next day was the best day of the whole year.

  42. ...when four strange men wearing funny hats came walking up to me. They seemed somehow familiar and yet so different. A mix of scary and piousness.
    One of them wore a gold bar as he reached towards me.
    - We have come to offer you a different life than what you lived so far. If you accept this gift and If you are ready to follow us ordinary people from different walks of life you need no longer be a slave to your insecurity. Our approach gives you freedom. If you refrain from receiving our gift, we can reassure you that nothing will change , everything will be as it was settled though even worse. Unfortunately if so, we will offer the next person this solid goldbar. What will be your choice?

  43. When up on my lawn, arose such a racket
    There on my house top, stook Margaret Thatcher
    Ronnie was looking at her with care
    saying socialism is not what we want here
    Now, Margaret, quick as a wink, go
    and tell Washington what we all think.

  44. I had to comment here because I am in awe of the cleverness, creativity, and thoughtfulness of everyone who had the courage and brilliance in continuing with the rest of the poem. It's sooo cool! I keep on coming back here to read more poems!

    I can see how many people really respect you and take on your teaching seriously and have made it their own. I loved reading everyone's input and the poems were all simply brilliant! I love the power of leveraging other people's skills. There is so much talent out there!

    Thank you for this wonderful Christmas gift. It made me so proud to get to know you Randy and to get to know those around you who strive to make this industry shine.

  45. And that night before Christmas no money in the bank,
    broken down car with no gas in the tank,
    people out shopping for gifts to give,
    I'm out shoplifting for food to live,
    the economy is looking better that's what they say,
    i see no difference still look like we're in the gray.
    I burned my last meal,
    So I took a sleeping pill,
    And that was the night before Christmas.

  46. Well, I was never much on Christmas so my mind is not into finishing the poem but I love getting together with my two children and now 1 grandbaby and unfortunately baby's daddy's couldn't be with us because of violent behavior and hopefully will get help but we had a nice meal and everyone was safe and the my younger daughter's boyfriend brought cookies which I haven't had in such a long time cause I found out I can't eat good stuff cause of high cholesterol but we had a great Christmas Eve even though I have no income . I made a good meal and ate cookies cause I have been working out 4 or 5 times a week and watching my fat intake and I very well deserve something tasty once in a while in my life. My family together, a good meal, sitting watching a silly movie "Aliens vs. Monsters" and cookies was a great Christmas Eve for me and my family.

  47. When out on the lawn, arose such a racket;
    You wanted a picture but I did grab a jacket
    Option C is a dancing inside of my head
    The thought of you sleeping with me in my bed
    The tease is fun and I couldn’t resist
    But now the poem heads back to Santa’s Christmas List
    Into the future of two thousand and ten
    Where men scared of change won’t step out of their pen
    We dream of a future that’s bright and of hope
    But most won’t dare change and again remain a dope
    If only they knew small steps taken are needed
    So life would be lived instead of just cheated
    Lessons learned from the past should make us take better care
    To realize the economy is not the bad air
    Will lessons of past bring a brighter future near
    They will if they listen to Randy and hear
    That life is a gift and we’ll prosper and grow
    If steps that we take are steady and slow
    The race will be won even if you stumble…
    And grab life’s true blessings, being thankful and humble.

  48. When arose from the Congress (all high in tax bracket),came the sound of health reform-Jeezus what a racket!

    With no "Payer Option",I'm thinkin' we're screwed, when Santa arrived,and said "Listen up,Dude!"

    He said "I know you all believed, in O-bama's promise, of health care reform, by Jove and St. Thomas! But as it's lookin' now, the reform's for the worse, so put your 'Pie In The Sky' ideas where they belong--in a hearse!"

    "Take it from me, it's more than a hunch,that it's true what they say: No Such Thing As Free Lunch! The "O-Man"'s a politician,and aren't they quite a bunch? They promise the SKY,and deliver the DIRT-so bend over, say 'Ah'- this might slightly hurt!"

    "There's BIG BUCKS at play here, make no mistake. And the Health Care folks? They haul it in with a rake! If you think they'll roll over, then for you I've got news-good old Obama is messin' with the "Golden Egg Laying Goose"!

    "You see-people think I bring free stuff,that's true. (Even Agnostic,Muslim and Jew!) If you believe that, my friend,you're living a lie-ya' want somthin' fer nuthin?- Oh dear and oh my. No--you get what you pay for,like it or not,which puts our old Prez in a pretty bad spot. He's damned if he do,and damned if he don't: Think he'll put HIS neck in the noose?-I think he won't! "

    "Most likely he'll wheel,and deal, and such-and all those promises he made?-they were a bit overmuch. There's a story about politics,and this might make you grieve,the name of the story? "Ali Baba and The 40 Thieves!"

    "So roll up your sleeves,and let's get to work-'cuz politics is for suckers, The Naive, and the jerks. Take it from me,one who's been around,keep your eyes in your head,and your feet on the ground.
    Be like my elves-they make their OWN toys,they don't put all their eggs in the basket of a guy from Illinois!"

    "You might be saying "where's your spirit,Mr.Claus? All this reality is giving us pause: Keep THIS up,and we won't laud YOU with applause!'

    "You want some advice, from good old St. Nick? Listen up 'yall,and let your ears prick. Create your won reality,to the extent you can. That way,you won't have to depend on "The Man". Use your own talents,I'm sure you have lots,though you might have heard different,from the gurus and crack-pots. It's never too late,to live the life of your dream,though you might have to disentangle yourself from the main-stream. Will it be hard? Yes,at times. You'll encounter lot's of B.S.,and silly nursery rhymes. Get used to working,and pursuing your dreams,get strong,get smart- and if you have to: GET MEAN! Be in control, of YOUR OWN HEALTH,and come to think of it-your happiness, relationships and wealth. Be your own "Santa"-it can be done- You might work alone,and be the only one. But in the long run you'll be happy,and will be in the right.
    And to you dear Reader-

    Merry Christmas and GOOD NIGHT!!!

  49. DEAR RANDY,

    I WAS WONDERING WHY YOU POSTED SUCH A POEM FOR CHRISTMAS, SO I AM NOT ABLE TO COMPLETE IT. IT HAS A LOT OF NEGATIVE ISSUES MAY BE HARD REALITIES OF LIFE.

    I KNOW THERE MUST BE SOME GOOD REASONS BEHIND THIS POEM AS YOU ARE VERY MUCH IN CONTROL OF THINGS YOU SAY AND DO.

    I AM FROM INDIA AND LOOKING FORWARD TO AN OPPORTUNITY TO MEET YOU AS EARLY AS POSSIBLE, I BADLY NEED TO MET YOU SOON, I NEED YOUR HELP TO GUIDE ME, READY TO DO WHATEVER YOU SAY. I NEED A CHANGE BADLY.

    THANKS A LOT

  50. When out on the lawn, arose such a racket,
    I said, oh dear look... another Secret Service
    replacement. Dressed another up in a red suit and Teddy. How ready we all are to bring some balance to life. Now that, Healthcare worked it's way into government hands... can we rest easy now, is this the Universes plan? Now not to worry, I'm not selfish anymore, we opened our door and fed the homeless on the Jersey Shore. Now.. wishes to all a Safe and Happy Holiday Season.... Thank You!!!! Good Night!!!

  51. I think this one's Brilliant! I think it should win...it's captured the spirit and forced me to grin...I'm glad all are trying to get on the game....but this one's a winner, John deserves fame!

    Happy Holidays all and powerful 2010 to ya!! Poppy

  52. When out on the lawn, arose such a racket,
    So I jumped to my feet and threw on my jacket.
    I ran to the window and to my surprise
    Was a goofy French bulldog with big bugged out eyes

    He said I am the “Christmas pup from future and past”
    And I’m here to set some things straight at long last.
    I don’t have much time so listen real close
    Turn on your recorder and take down some notes.

    You see I’m not just a dog with really big ears
    I’m a magical pup that flies through the years.
    Both backwards an forwards and all in between
    You wouldn’t believe what these big eyes have seen

    I’ve been around for many a year
    And I’m her to spread some real Christmas Cheer.
    Your TVs and pod casts and cell phones and such
    Have gone overboard with the with the negative touch

    We’ve all been handed a big crock of poop
    About the world situation… well here’s the real scoop
    It just may be true that the world has some problems
    But it’s also true that we can and will solve them.

    I may not have thumbs but I can still count to ten
    And we can all get us out of this mess that were in
    I may chase my tail but at least I’m not complaining
    Or sitting around making excuses and blaming

    The truth of the matter is it’s time to go nuts
    Get some things done… and get of our butts
    Instead of looking at how the economy is so slow
    Open your eyes and look where we want to go

    And if you have trouble focusing in that direction
    Just find a way that you can make a connection
    With others that may not have the good fortune or good luck
    Reach back and help them pull themselves up

    You can’t help someone get to the top shelf
    Without getting a little closer yourself
    The truth of the matter is there’s still lots of money
    It’s just in other paces and I’m not being funny

    Here’s some advice sp please get behind it
    If you want more stuff just g out and find it
    There’s still lots of hope and there’s still virtue
    Just look around and I swear it won’t hurt you.

    There’s still lots of people that really do care
    There’s still lots of people who genuinely care

    God gave you humans a remarkable ability
    Of creating your future with grace and humility
    Why you don’t use it is beyond me I swear
    I guess it’s just easier to whine and be scared

    But I’m telling you here and I’m telling you now
    Follow your dreams and you’ll find them some how
    I’ve noticed that people just seem to forget it
    That the universe is here to help if you let it

    So help one another you silly human beings
    And turn off the negative garbage you’re seeing
    It doesn’t take a genius to see there’s no gain
    By focusing on drama and turmoil and pain

    So gather your courage, your wisdom, your guts
    And stand up and pull your heads out of your butts

    Then that dog jumped about ten feet in the air
    Waved his paws all around like he just didn’t care
    He said I’ve got one last stop before I go home
    I’ve got to stop at the white house to burry a bone.

    Then he clicked his heals twice and pointed up high
    Then like a rocket he shot through the sky

    You might not believe me what happened that night
    But I can still hear the last thing he said as he shot out of sight

    The grass will still grow if you don’t bother it
    But it’s always much greener right where you water it

  53. I have to rethink...my vote went to John...but now reading this...I just come undone...time to regroup...think this all thru....maybe I can vote for two?!

  54. I have to agree with Randy, this was great! I'm not a poet so I didn't participate, so I just enjoyed everyone else's efforts.

    Take care and have a Happy and Very Prosperous New Year!

    Lucinda The Operadiva

  55. When out on the lawn, arose such a racket,
    I am so sad now, emptiness in my heart pocket,
    Looking after the beauty of life, where it is?
    I was full enough to believe that there is bliss...

    I can't continue anymore, I'm not an English speaker, so I don't want to spoil it, I love English!

    Randy, I know that I am out of the subject, but I still need just a quarter of the prize to can live further... With all the shame that i feel, I must try to get out of my situation, so I gived it a shut...
    I am now where you was once, so I hope that you will read this and, if it is possible, help me.
    Here in my country it is hard to get up, but I will...
    Blessings,

  56. HI RANDY...

    I AM FROM CAMBODIA. I WISH TO JOIN WITH THIS COMPETITION, BUT I AM NOT GOOD AT POEM. BESIDES MY ENGLISH STILL LIMIT.

    ANY OTHER CHANCE TO WIN A COMPETITION?

    I DREAM TO MEET YOU IN PERSONS IN YOUR EARIEST CONVENIENCE. I WISH TO HEAR YOUR VOICE AND I NEED YOUR GUIDANCE.

    I WISH YOU FOR A WONDERFUL AND PROSPEROUS NEW YEAR 2010!

    Soursdey

  57. hi randy
    plase send me seminar dubai palinure international
    tanks

    Merry Christmas & Happy New Year to Randy! Love.

  58. salam mojgan joon
    mage ma mordim ke mikhay ba randy sex koni
    ye gharar bezar bebinin hamdigaro shayad toonestim doostay khoobi vase ham beshim

    mohammad

  59. ‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through the U.S.;
    The economy was tanking, and things were a mess.
    The stockings were hung by the chimney with care;
    Hoping for coal, because the fuel tanks were bare.

    The government health care plan wasn’t looking like a winner;
    Resembling nine wolves and a sheep, voting on what’s for dinner.
    The media had all the meaty issues it could handle;
    Keeping their focus on the Tiger sex scandal.

    When out on the lawn, arose such a racket;
    The white House became a hut of the uncle of Volume;
    But burn newspapers and throw out the TV;
    Trust in Santa Klausa and it will necessarily come!

  60. ...And people run away to their home
    cause of cold and dark rainy night

    there was a wish that night like last year:
    "This year is another one but not like the others
    the world will become better
    the man health will improve
    and the PEASE is the GOAL"

    Regards
    Mahdi

  61. JEG SØGER 2 PIGER SOM SKAL BO HOS .MEJ OG I FOR DET GOT OG I KAN RINGE PÅ 24208019 DØJTE RUNT.OG DET GØR IKKE NOGET AT I ER MØRKE.OG I SKAL KUNE TALE DANSK.

  62. Thanks for another interesting article Randy! If you require a <a href="http://www.festivechristmasjumpers.co.uk">christmas jumpers</a> then please feel free to visit our site - Merry Christmas Randy!

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  • 83 comments on “T’was the Night Before Christmas, 2009”

    1. Hi Randy! Thanks for the hilarious satire on the FTC regs! LOL 🙂 Please note: attribution of this post is not authorized and any attempt to link my comments to me, my family, any of my facebook friends or twitter followers will be disavowed. In such a egregious situation I will take any and all actions necessary to preserve and protect whatever is left of my personal dignity. But I agree with you totally Hahahaha 🙂 Merry whatever-it-is we're allowed to call it. Kent

    2. You’re always besides us and fill our hearts all the best feeling as well as wisdom. Thanks for what you are doing. Wishing you all the best to your life. Merry Christmas & Happy New Year to Randy! Love.

    3. ...when out on the lawn there arose such a racket,
      I shook with excitement and reached for a jacket.
      I looked out the window but saw nothing there,
      I think old St. Nick must be around here somewhere.

      I ran out the door to see my lawn's blanket of white,
      the street lights were dim, there was no one in sight.
      I heard a rustling in the trees nearby,
      so I lifted my head and my eyes toward the sky.

      The sound that I heard was hilarious, sir,
      it was old St. Nick caught in the tall fir!
      The sled was all tangled, the deer ran amuck,
      to my surprise, albeit relief, here came the fire truck!

      We lifted them up and out of the tree ,
      inside they came for a cup of hot tea.
      The jolly man thanked me for saving the night
      then he wiped off his chin and kissed me good night.

      I heard the old man sing with glee and delight,
      Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good night!

    4. When out on the lawn, arose such a racket;
      I jumped for my 9mm, thought I heard a crack-head.
      Away to the peep-hole I looked through and through;
      Tore open the door to get a better view.

      The moon was New and street lamps above, casting strange shadows array;
      From around the house in the corner of my eye, saw a hurried fellow fly by.
      I must go investigate, for I must know, why.. or who;
      Oh wait, thats just the neighbor the Jew.

      His foot prints from my front lawn, I cursed and I fussed;
      That bastard, so stupid, Why? what was his just.
      Went back to my door confused and dischevelled, he seemed such a twit;
      Where upon the top step he had mysteriously left a great gift.

      So I breathed in relief, for my neighbor he's new;
      With this economey so uneasy I would have never knew.
      His kindness and openess for if he had been caught;
      Between us just strangers, there we would have fought.

      A gift from a neighbor/a stranger it's true;
      He opened his heart to someone he never knew.
      My heart filled with joy, so I put the 9mm away;
      I sat aside my differences for tomorrow would dawn a new day.

      *I would just like to say I myself am Agnostic. My mother converted to Judaism 13 years ago before marying her last husband and giving birth to my little brother, who is of course Jewish. I have nothing against the Jewish faith, and did not mean to imply anything by the above.

      Happy Holidays to all, and to all a good night!

      😉 Jamie

    5. Dear Randy

      HAPPY CHRISTMAS! AND I WISH FOR YOU THESE 4 WONDERFULL ITEMS
      A) $100,000 cash;
      B) My Viper SRT;
      C) A night of hot steamy sex with me; or,
      D) Honorable mention in the next blog post

      CHEERS

      MOJGAN

    6. …when out on the lawn there arose such a racket,
      Obama & Santa were holding a packet,
      A ho ho ho and a yes we can
      Said Santa the white man and the man with a tan

      We'll do it together, make everything right,
      What happened next, gave me a fright
      Out of the darkness the Grinch appeared
      Laughing & joking, he tugged Santas beard

      There was no letting go, the Grinch held on tight,
      "Halt" said Obama, " Please cease this fight",
      Then out of the dark 2 Bushes appear
      George seniour & junior, spreading good cheer

      We all are alike, no matter our skin,
      You just have to look to the heart within
      And right before them landed a dove,
      Spreading the spirit of peace and love

      Out on the lawn, no longer a racket,
      They all stood together and opened the pakket
      When seeing it's contents, eyes shining bright,
      They were joined as one, that Christmas night.

    7. When out on the lawn there arose such a racket....
      Did the music remind me of old Hinge and Bracket?
      I ran to the window..it was foggy...not clear...
      Cant they leave me alone at this time of year..?

      Everyone jolly....eating and shopping
      Dont bother me or call I wont be stopping
      To listen to your cheer or try to be funny
      I am going to bed to dream of my money....

      But before I could move the room it felt cold
      I wanted to move but a voice said be told
      Take a look at yourself and the way that you think
      Be positive..be well otherwise you will sink

      I dont understand you..I have enough to get by
      I want you to go..you are making me cry
      Enough to get by dont make me laugh
      What about living..an adventure..go see a giraffe

      Those things arent for me not at this stage
      I think you should start to read Randy Gage.
      Can he change Christmas can he give me wealth
      He can show you how..but you do it yourself.

      It starts in your mind ..throw out all the doubt
      Believe in yourself..dance sing and shout
      Get out on the lawn and join in the racket
      They're all millionaires..theyre worth quite a packet....

      I listened to Randy a long time ago
      I changed my lifestyle and dispelled all the woe
      Being successfull I am so full of cheer
      I had to stop by and wish you Happy Christmas
      and avery Prosperous New Year......

      Have a great time Randy.....love Angie xxx

    8. The Night Before Christmas, 2009
      (With profound apologies to Clement Clarke Moore and his estate)

      ‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through the U.S.;
      The economy was tanking, and things were a mess.
      The stockings were hung by the chimney with care;
      Hoping for coal, because the fuel tanks were bare.

      The government health care plan wasn’t looking like a winner;
      Resembling nine wolves and a sheep, voting on what’s for dinner.
      The media had all the meaty issues it could handle;
      Keeping their focus on the Tiger sex scandal.

      When out on the lawn, arose such a racket;
      'Tis the deafman, fighting the ugly collectivisms.
      Libertarianism beating in 'is heart;
      as he sprays the Light of Libertarianisms to the people.

      And the forces of collectivisms falls before the onslaught;
      As the people awaken to the lies of collectivisms.
      And begins their new lives in the light of Libertarianism;
      And a new glory of Libertarianisms shone on a planet of freedom-loving people.

    9. considering my vocation, I had to post an entry here even though it's not a true entry into this contest - this version was written by my contest buddy Hope, ENJOY!:

      twas the night before christmas
      and all through the house
      the only critter stirring was me
      and not even the mouse

      the stockings were hung by the chimney with care
      filled to the brim with prize winnings fair
      the children were nestled all snugs in their beds
      while visions of what mommy would win danced in their heads

      and me in my jamas and on the lap top
      i had settled down to do those last minute contest top ups
      when out of the lawn there arose such a clatter
      i sprung from my chair to see what was the matter

      away to the window i flew like a flash
      tore open the shutters and threw up the sash
      what to my wondering eyes did appear
      a miniature sleigh and 8 reindeer

      the driver of course had to be st nick
      cause he looked at me and winked
      said, 'go to bed girl, contests can wait
      next year will be many more you can partake'

      'go get some rest, take it easy on your hands
      dream of assorted goodies and exotic lands
      from monthlies, to weeklies, dailies and more
      but remember...you can't win them all'

      but know that you can't win if you don't enter
      work at it hard and you will be a mentor
      to help others to win as you will too
      merry christmas to you and all contestors afoot!

    10. When out on the lawn, arose such a racket;
      A guy in Taiwan read and watch in his black jacket!
      He wanted to join this intellectual chat;
      And the muse in him runs like a back street rat

      Twas the night before Christmas and he's not in U.S.;
      A million miles apart yet his world were also a mess.
      He may speak a different language and have a different name;
      but the connection came and was as surreal as a virtual game.

      The people is all crying for help and looking for hope;
      And for ways, ideas and methods to cope;
      How can we break free from this deteriorating norms;
      So we can LIVE OUT OUR LIFE freely in whatever forms!

      The truth is really the same here, there and anywhere;

      So by all means do share, care or simply be aware;

      Because Twas the night before Christmas everywhere!

    11. When out on the lawn, arose such a racket;
      It was Gage who was saying, the formula he did crack it,
      Don't just grind away doing your 9 to 5,
      For this was the worst way to try and stay alive.

      Think positive, stand tall, do not live in distress,
      We have the best way to achieve your success,
      With belief and strong will we can show you the way,
      To turn bad fortune as you see it into pay day,

      Join us in our venture of well being and health
      Join us in our venture of creating great wealth,
      Suck it up and deliver your story with pride,
      for if you decide to join us we will stand by your side,

      We will show you our way of leverage and teaching,
      Of how one person can have a business far reaching,
      And earn while they sleep from places afar,
      While they sleep in a warm bed under their lucky star.

      Do not fear our story as it is proven to be true,
      And on the night before Christmas it can happen for you!

    12. There was Randy Gage
      In a brand new jacket

      Jingle Bell earrings
      And a flashing light tie
      It left me speechless
      Oh my, what a guy

      He decked out his Bentley
      And filled it with toys
      Of course model cars
      For the girls and the boys

      He knew the adults
      Needed much more
      Safe Is the New Risky
      By their front door

      As Randy road off
      On this Christmas Eve
      I could hear him shout
      It made me believe

      Ho! Ho! Ho!
      Cash Flow class it is right
      Happy Holidays to all
      And to all a goodnight!

    13. ROTFLMAO! This is the best post I have read this year!

      When out on the lawn, arose such a racket;
      ....the've come for my house, I'll just have to pack it.
      Off to the airport I go in a tear,
      Upon my return, my house not there.

      I've worked all my life for someone not me,
      Just to be flushed like a bowl full of pee.
      No options, no future they hoped I would see,
      but fools that they are there them and not me.

      To start my own biz in times such a mess,
      what was I thinking? of only success!
      The past two years I've often been stumped,
      if not for my family, I'd surely have jumped.

      To give to my family is my only goal,
      but old Uncle Sam gives nothing but coal.
      So it's just up to me to grow such a tree,
      I'll make it I'm sure, you'll see you'll see!

      I may lose my house to the thieves in the night,
      but my family is stronger, due to this plight.
      We'll find a new house if that's what we must,
      to lay down our bones, and not let them rust.

      To stay in the game is the way to succeed,
      and screw all the bankers ... there so full of greed.
      Politicians of the day are so fricking blind,
      they do what they must to save their behind.

      But surprise to them all they'll find Christmas day,
      there's a movement within that wants it our way!
      To grow for our family is all that we crave,
      to sick it to them is the way we behave.

      We grow by the masses and to their surprise,
      they soon will ask for a fair compromise.
      But they just offer volume to our issues at heart,
      but we stick to our guns ... we want a fresh start!

      Joe Vizi

    14. Randy, can't u go to the government and have a few words, make them vote this bill down? I know u can do it, u just have to look deep down inside, and let the Jedi knight out!

    15. ‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through the U.S.;
      The economy was tanking, and things were a mess.
      The stockings were hung by the chimney with care;
      Hoping for coal, because the fuel tanks were bare.

      The government health care plan wasn’t looking like a winner;
      Resembling nine wolves and a sheep, voting on what’s for dinner.
      The media had all the meaty issues it could handle;
      Keeping their focus on the Tiger sex scandal.

      When out on the lawn, arose such a racket;
      Santa dashed to the window hoping to tract it.
      The racket was Serena’s and the point was hers too,
      After choking an umpire who “had the wrong view”.

      Santa looked at his list to check nice and naughty.
      The nice list was not large, the other not paltry.
      Santa felt hopey changy at the dawn of the year,
      but t’was no longer true now that evening was near.

      Sure, Sully had landed his plane in the waters,
      and he saw Obama, his wife and his daughters.
      But what began with such promise soon turned to mere ash
      With Citibank and Chrysler both spending our cash.

      Santa’s good list got lighter – though you’d better not pout –
      When Jackson and Swayze both did dance out
      Farrah, Soupy and Teddy went thru the same door
      And no “rest of the story” will we hear any more.

      With those giants gone, there’s always new buzz.
      Kanye wasn’t so swift, but Taylor sure was.
      Balloon boy, gate crashers and the Nobel Peace Prize,
      The good and the bad will pass through our lives

      Our friend Santa always makes two lists every year,
      To find boys and girls, both naughty and dear.
      But we must have faith he will do his job well.
      Even more so to know that we will excel.

      Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night.

    16. HAHAHA
      thanks for the best Christmas Laugh ever dear!!
      I´ll pass it on to the Amway people in my network 😉

      Before I enter the competition, please tell me the chance-% og the C (not especially interested in the other prizes 😉

      Wishing all of you wonderful holidays, and that the new year may be your best EVER!!!

      Warm Networking regards,
      Tina

    17. I loved: “Christmas” “God” and “Jesus” are registered trademarks of the Amway Corporation; all rights reserved.

      Thanks for the morning laugh. :o)

    18. Hey Randy Claus! Here's mine.....
      =====
      When out on the lawn there arose such a racket!
      The herd's cry had changed from "I like it!" to "I lack it!"

      Scowling and howling, their voices were bitter.
      "I'm entitled to win (even though I'm a quitter)."

      Then what to my wondering eyes should appear
      But a handsome young man who said "you have nothing to fear!"

      "You create your own world," he said with a smile
      "I speak the truth, without malice or guile."

      "Problems are opportunities disguised in work clothes.
      Your success is as plain as the front of your nose!"

      But the herd wouldn't listen -- they hooted and booed.
      (And some of their remarks were downright rude.)

      But the man wasn't shaken; he showed no dismay.
      "A few people are listening, and that makes my day!"

      As he hopped in his Viper and roared out of sight,
      He promised one and all, "The future is bright!"

      Then he added a wish, one that he held dear:
      "Prosperity to all, and to all a great year!"
      =====
      Wishing you and all your friends the happiest of holidays, Randy!
      jim

    19. The Night Before Christmas, 2009
      (With profound apologies to Clement Clarke Moore and his estate)

      ‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through the U.S.;
      The economy was tanking, and things were a mess.
      The stockings were hung by the chimney with care;
      Hoping for coal, because the fuel tanks were bare.

      The government health care plan wasn’t looking like a winner;
      Resembling nine wolves and a sheep, voting on what’s for dinner.
      The media had all the meaty issues it could handle;
      Keeping their focus on the Tiger sex scandal.

      When out on the White House lawn, there arose such a racket;
      All the businessmen and thinkers had brought a straight jacket.
      For every politician in Washington land;
      So we could attend to the real issues at hand.

      This Christmas would be different with real people in charge;
      While America cheered for real change in the cards.
      The liberal media was shut down for good;
      While channels of prosperity were put where they stood.

      First on the agenda was a term limit vote
      It passed 100% and that's all she wrote
      One and you're done that what the law said
      Politicians were ousted with faces of red

      Next we tried them for treason, something not heard in a while
      All their big payoffs were brought up at the trial
      Not one of them made it, all corrupt you see;
      There was the biggest hanging ever on national TV.

      Everyone got the picture, the people were back;
      And it's your own damn fault, if you're living in lack.
      People looking for handouts, we told to go to hell;
      That was no longer an option, we took care of ourselves.

      Capitalism ruled in the country once again;
      And jobs weren't farmed out to some foreign land.
      The corruption was gone, the country was free;
      Bailouts were over, the markets at peace.

      America was back and old laws were repealed;
      This change was good and the nation was healed.
      All this seems a little too good to be true;
      But hey this is Christmas it's what I want don't you.

      I also want the 100 grand Mr. Gage;
      I think that my poem will be all the rage.
      I'm a generous man living the dream;
      100 grand would really make me sing.

      So I will leave all my contact info for you;
      Then my christmas wish can really come true.
      The check can be sent to the address below;
      And my life will sure change with all of that dough.

      Sam Patton
      78 Meadow Ridge Dr.
      Fort Valley, GA 31030
      478-827-1587
      [email protected]

    20. Universe provide capital for my new business venture which will impact many small business owners all over the Planet Earth,

      Universe, Universe, Universe provide the solution.. provide it quickly because you know what it is worth.

      It will save many businesses, families from despair,

      Impacting and improving visions and mental repair.

      It's all about thought, the power to believe.

      Believe, Believe, Believe with all your abilities.

      The Universe will provide the answer immediately.

    21. when out on the lawn there arose such a racket
      I lept from my bed, grabbing boots and a jacket,

      and out on each neighbors lawn a banker or two
      each carrying a hammer, sign and a kazoo,

      singing songs and posting signs on every door
      and the bankers did more,

      by removing the credit of each boy and girl
      raising interest rates, and compounding debt all in a whirl,

      they jumped in their limos, drinks they were pouring
      and three cheers, 'hurray out finest day', while neighbors a snoring,

      and I heard them exclaim as they drove out of sight
      happy foreclosure to all and to all a good night

    22. When out on the lawn, arose such a racket;
      As Santa arrived loudly wearing a full metal jacket.

      A cloud of coal dust surrounded him and he was awful smelly
      He had a broad dirty face and a verynlarge flabby beer belly

      Gripping a large bulging sack of coal to which he held tightly
      With his right hand then gave me the finger, while smiling mightily

      With a maniacal laugh he then sprang into his BMW, yelling “bye sucker”
      And away he drove I heard him exclaim, “climate change my ass, bye sucker”

    23. ‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through the U.S.;
      The economy was tanking, and things were a mess.
      The stockings were hung by the chimney with care;
      Hoping for coal, because the fuel tanks were bare.

      The government health care plan wasn’t looking like a winner;
      Resembling nine wolves and a sheep, voting on what’s for dinner.
      The media had all the meaty issues it could handle;
      Keeping their focus on the Tiger sex scandal.

      When out on the lawn, arose such a racket;
      Ted Kennedy left his meatsuit & The Jackson's sold Michael's Jacket.
      Santa Claus was instructed to deliver only Chinese goods;
      additional Government cheese spread through middle-class hoods.

      The messiah of prosperity added a shiny new Viper to his fleet;
      fundamentalists became infuriated...unable to afford shoes on their feet.
      Pigs could now fly and the flu boosted vaccine sales worldwide;
      43 Trillion reasons why the USA stimulated debt, yet paper bonds died.

      Fear-porn captivated minds every night, 'twas the night before christmas;
      anti-depressant pills, unpaid bills, and plenty of sugar for all - delicious!
      A few scrooges said 'humbug' to all this nonsense, living outside the rat-race;
      their proposition of what's to come was magnificent, as if touched by God's grace.

      'Twas the night before christmas and two types of people celebrated;
      the disciples prosperity & mingled-minds that are media-orchestrated.
      Many went to church that evening to pray to a God that was a jealous fuhrer;
      crying about their lack and poverty, ill-health, and were handed a mirror...

      'Twas the night before christmas and Christ had arrived from the past;
      instructed to look in the mirror, each person gave up victomhood at last!
      Obama was pleased, we didn't have to sell war to pay off debt anymore;
      the medical community rejoiced, patients health actually became restored.

      Newspapers and media covered the event as a catastrophe of major proportions;
      it had to have been an epidemic of delusion, this anomaly was a distortion!
      'Twas the night before christmas and nobody read the propaganda the media served;
      the miracle of full-responsibility gave every man and woman what they deserved.

      Dozens of Vipers and other exotic vehicles were delivered to homes by Mr. Claus;
      the opportunity to be displaced became a nudge to be your own boss.
      A million new millionaire's were birthed into the world from the ashes of defeat;
      perhaps it was even the one who is currently sitting in your seat!

      'Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house...
      nobody believed any longer that they should live as poor as a church mouse.
      everyone realized that money DOES grow on trees, and YES it is true;
      you're always at the scene of the crime, the center of your Universe is YOU!

      Coals were burning, the snow flakes dumped all over the midwest;
      yet somehow everyone knew that these times were in fact the very best!
      Executives working paper-hat jobs handed over their funds and got robbed;
      looked within themselves before giving it one last sob.

      Then a roar of laughter erupted throughout the ethers, all was indeed well;
      a shift of attention was placed on ushering in heaven on Earth instead of hell.
      The blame-game wasn't played after dinner and many refused to drink the 'spirits';
      the alarm sirens of fear blasted out through the airwaves, yet no one could hear it.

      Tithes flooded the post office and CNN reported a huge vacuum-like black hole;
      like a whirlpool, the collective release of victimhood stole the whole show.
      'Twas the last night before Christmas that the ghost of christmas past appeared;
      at last, the 'end of the world' prophesied meant the end of the fear!

      The fallen world sank, false sciences were scrutinized to their demise;
      grandpa and grandma caught the evening news yelling, 'lies, lies, lies!'
      People gave up their dis-eases and embraced prosperity instead;
      'Twas the night before Christmas and it was all thoughts in our head.

      The end.

    24. Randy...explain your "probably not" in today's email? This does not sound anything like the messages that are instilled in us each day.....did you write that?..."probably not"..

      Also...how about adding a selection of emoticons to the blog.
      Gloria

    25. When out on the lawn, arose such a racket,
      I sprang from the bed, stumbled and fell over a packet;

      Away to the stairway I flew very driven,
      Sometimes all of our thoughts are misgiven;

      The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow,
      Gave white light to objects below;

      When, what did appear to my wondering eyes and forces,
      But a new Viper SRT, and six hundred horses!

      With a tall, sexy driver, so lively and quick,
      I knew in a moment it must be St. Nick;

      More rapid than rock stars his coursers they came,
      And he tweeted, and blogged, and called them by name;

      "Now, Dasher! now, Dancer! now, Prancer and Vixen!
      On, Comet! on Cupid! on, Donder and Blitzen!

      Tonight's the night! Let's live it up!
      Go out and smash it! Fill up your cup!"

      As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,
      When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky,

      It was like lightning, Everybody was frightening,
      And the music was soothing, And they all started grooving!

      And then, global warming, I heard on the web,
      The prancing and pawing of each little ebb;

      As I drew in my head, and was turning around,
      Down the chimney St. Nicholas came with a bound;

      He was dressed all in Prada...hot, sticky and sweet,
      from his head to his feet.

      A bundle of toys he had flung on his back,
      Cars, watches, i-phones, gadgets, apps & a mac;

      His eyes -- how they twinkled! They are the mirror of the soul,
      Giving and receiving...hopefully not coal!

      His mouth was drawn up like a bow, a spark,
      sometimes resembling a smiling great white shark;

      The stump of a spoon he held tight in his teeth,
      because there is no spoon;

      He was athletic and trim, a serious baseball player,
      And I was inspired when I saw him, truly multi-layer;

      A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,
      Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread;

      He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work with clarity,
      Helping people to transform self-limiting beliefs into self-fulfilling breakthroughs to achieve their dreams and prosperity.

      And pausing a moment, cause sometimes we don't really notice, he reflected,
      And giving a nod, all was connected.

      He sprang to his Viper SRT, to his team gave a cue,
      You can shine a little light on everything around you;

      But I heard him exclaim, ere he flew to Wisconsin,
      "Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night!"

    26. From all my heart, I wish you a Merry Christmas , Randy!

      I express my deepest appreciation for all inspiration and informal spiritual guidance you provided me with from pages of your books and this blog.
      Keep the fire of hope buring inside the hearts of ones who are in need of it !

    27. When out on the lawn, arose such a racket;

      An industry becoming, the answer for masses.
      It started with 1, then 2, then 4, it soon became clear
      There was room for much more.

      Change is hard, resistance is stiff
      But soon people will rejoice with this new christmas gift
      Hope and Freedom are much more than dreams
      It’s a life worth living, A soul gifting thing.

      With gratitude and blessings all thru the land
      A new kind of peace was truly at hand
      Prosperity was turning and the people had vision
      Not even Santa could imagine this new found provision.

      It cuts to the core, and gets to the chase.
      This networking thing is for the whole human race.
      So off to the new year and on thru the ages
      This distribution time is just in the beginning stages.

      I finish with a smile and laughter to boot, for my
      Mind races as I see Santa coming thru the shoot
      Big fat boots and big fat belly. He networked all night
      And now he is hear, Networking with me over cookies
      And good cheer.

      Travis Wolf
      16305 bates cove
      Pflugerville,tx 78660

    28. The Night Before Christmas, 2009
      (With profound apologies to Clement Clarke Moore and his estate)

      ‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through the U.S.;
      The economy was tanking, and things were a mess.
      The stockings were hung by the chimney with care;
      Hoping for coal, because the fuel tanks were bare.

      The government health care plan wasn’t looking like a winner;
      Resembling nine wolves and a sheep, voting on what’s for dinner.
      The media had all the meaty issues it could handle;
      Keeping their focus on the Tiger sex scandal.

      When out on the lawn, arose such a racket;
      I sprang from my KenkoAire™ and threw on my jacket.
      Away to the sun deck I stumbled and fell,
      Threw open the front doors and screamed, "What the hell…!"

      Clouds covered the moon and I couldn't see shit,
      And being night-blind I figured I'd quit.
      When what to my wondering eyes should be there,
      But an MLM Rock Star— the one with no hair.

      He drove up in his Bentley, (No, not the Arnage)
      And I knew in a moment, "That's Randy Gage.
      And he wasn't alone, by the dozens they came,
      And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name!

      "Now Wesley! now, Billy! now, Eli and Avigail,
      On Matt, on Juan Carlos, on Alex and Yael!
      To the top of the Quadra-Plan! to the top of them all!
      Now duplicate, duplicate, duplicate all!"

      As dry teams that before the Miami Hurricane's fly,
      When they meet with an objection, pass on the fly.
      So all round my condo the coursers they flew,
      With Randy, his softball team and Eric Worre too.

      And then, in a twinkling, I heard from inside,
      A great buzz and excitement impossible to hide
      I turned going in just to give them a greeting.
      There he was in my living room conducting a meeting!

      He was dressed custom-made from his neck to his toes,
      My annual income could be spent on those clothes!
      On my 42-inch plasma a DVD played.
      And everyone was sharing 'bout the money they'd made.

      His eyes-how they twinkled! his dimples how merry!
      His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry!
      His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,
      And the gleam off his head set the whole room aglow.

      A Patek Philippe gleamed from under his sleeve,
      He was so mesmerizing no one wanted to leave.
      He spoke of prosperity, freedom and wealth,
      And he boasted with pride how he'd restored his health.

      He was tall, dark & handsome like a Rivendell Elf.
      And I was saddened by comparing him to myself!
      But a wink of his eye and a tilt of his head,
      Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread.

      His encouraging words were all about work,
      He built my belief, then turned with a jerk.
      And laying an application on the table before,
      "Sign here," he told me, then flew out the door!

      He sprang to his Bentley, to his team gave a whistle,
      And away they all flew like the down of a thistle.
      But I heard him exclaim, ‘ere he drove out of sight,
      "Residual income for all, and to all a good-night!"

      w/Love and deepest apologies— John Milton

    29. Have an eggnog and lighten up a little. Merry Christmas!

      Have to think about the emoticons. Think I prefer a little more intelligent conversation that just smiley faces and frowns.

      -RG

    30. The Night Before Christmas, 2009
      (With profound apologies to Clement Clarke Moore and his estate)
      ‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through the U.S.;
      The economy was tanking, and things were a mess.
      The stockings were hung by the chimney with care;
      Hoping for coal, because the fuel tanks were bare.
      The government health care plan wasn’t looking like a winner;
      Resembling nine wolves and a sheep, voting on what’s for dinner.
      The media had all the meaty issues it could handle;
      Keeping their focus on the Tiger sex scandal.

      When out on the lawn, arose such a racket;
      I wasn’t sure what I saw so I thought I should attack it.

      I looked up, I looked down and thought could this be a friend?
      Or is what was coming would cause the end.

      Then I realized the man I saw could only serve four.
      After that I could put his picture in a drawer.

      On Dancer, on Prancer on Rudolph on Blitzen.
      Only 3 years left and we’ll again be Ritzen.

    31. ... went out on the lawn there arose such a racket,
      with all us screwed by this outlandish packet.

      Screaming and running;
      is there a doctor in'THE HOUSE'? Not a sign of one.
      Though the looters are humming as drunk as a Souse.

      So Santa babe, I'll remedy this pain with a dose of "Ayn Rand,"

      Dream BIG and lots of blessings,
      Leslie
      NYC

    32. I thought about entering this contest and I am sure I could come up with some cutting remarks about how the government is treating us all so badly and the recession is driving most of my friends into bankruptcy but then I thought again. I would so much rather focus on the things that truly matter to me this year.
      My family, my friends, and the love we all have for each other. Talking on the phone with my 83 year old grandmother, having a positive and upbeat conversation with my mother (a rarity there), the grandma across the street bringing over Diet Sprite because she remembered I like Sprite (not diet but whatever, she was thinking of me), my daughter who hugs me for no other reason than because she loves her mom. Those are the things that matter right this moment. Not the government or the climate or the banks. Today, right this moment the people in my life are more important than anything else.
      Have a wonderful, safe, full of love and peace holiday everyone!

    33. The Night Before Christmas, 2009
      (With profound apologies to Clement Clarke Moore and his estate)

      ‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through the U.S.;
      The economy was tanking, and things were a mess.
      The stockings were hung by the chimney with care;
      Hoping for coal, because the fuel tanks were bare.

      The government health care plan wasn’t looking like a winner;
      Resembling nine wolves and a sheep, voting on what’s for dinner.
      The media had all the meaty issues it could handle;
      Keeping their focus on the Tiger sex scandal.

      When out on the lawn, arose such a racket;
      I remember the price of my diamond wallet.‎
      Close your eyes, count from ten to one, at once;‎
      Cheers! You’re rich, right? Do it every month.‎

      Hum, it’s not an amazing test, understood?‎
      I wanna just our happiness, that’s good.‎
      What’s coming up in New Year? No matter!‎
      because our mind is so rich, that’s better.‎

      People say:” happy New Year”. For what?‎
      To change our attitude, like acrack shot.‎
      Great! In your dream you want to buy a bay;‎
      Well, work on your sub-consciousness, that’s the way.‎

      Believe yourself, it’s your turn to create your kingdom world;‎
      Oh lord, don’t hesitate, you know the value of time? It’s gold.‎
      Go ahead, enjoy now, dance more, and listen to your heart-beat;‎
      How long it takes to achieve your vision? You’re right. Just a bit.‎

    34. the night before christmas i see a wide river with diamonds so i walk through the river the river is not deep but very long and as i keep walking every diamond shines diffrent ,every diamond has a diffrent color,they are so beautifull only shining for me,i do not pick them up but i keep walking and when i finally reach the end of the river there is my sweethaert standing with a suitcase with 1milion dollars ,a limusine and a case full of diamonds to welcome me,this is my kind of night before christmas. diamondkisses corinne-spain

    35. The Night Before Christmas, 2009
      (With profound apologies to Clement Clarke Moore and his estate)

      ‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through the U.S.;
      The economy was tanking, and things were a mess.
      The stockings were hung by the chimney with care;
      Hoping for coal, because the fuel tanks were bare.

      The government health care plan wasn’t looking like a winner;
      Resembling nine wolves and a sheep, voting on what’s for dinner.
      The media had all the meaty issues it could handle;
      Keeping their focus on the Tiger sex scandal.

      When out on the lawn, arose such a racket;
      Twas Miss Elin, burning 17 pictures of hoochies wearing nothing but the Tiger's Green Jacket.

      All people wanted, was America to have CHANGE
      they didn't do their homework, and now they feel strange.
      Too many years later, NOW we want to audit the FED????
      Sorry you silly voter, they took all your bread!!

      Up in the skies, the CEO's still getting bonuses,
      You think it's crazy? You voted for "HIM" you crybaby chingones!
      They still came back and proclaimed, "Please Sir, may I have another?"
      Next time use lube, cause "He" just gave YOU another!

      All the President's men, behind the iron curtain,
      Meanwhile, you and the old lady are claiming you're really hurtin.
      We'll take Mexico, Canada, US of A.....
      Let's all unite and spend EURO'S one day!

      Turn on the tube and what do you see?
      Mindless entertainment, you're so hooked on "GLEE."
      The man is coming in his red suit,
      he's got lots of bills for ya,
      to pay for those new work boots.

      "On Palin, on Britney, On Michael, On Lindsay...
      Merry Christmas to all.....
      Santa wants to tell you,
      You should have voted for RON PAUL!!!!!"

      (Thanks for letting me vent in Spanglish.)
      Cristina

    36. such a racket! alarms went off in all of our minds
      our right brains came over to our lefts with out any reigns.
      and now and now and now our dreams and the visions are vibrant in the land and air and milky way, we take iron fisted responsibility for our actions and thoughts and all is right in the world.

    37. 'Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house
      Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse.

      They rested in peace as they knew after all
      Things usually work out to the benefit of all.

      Their energy was focused, they took due care
      To make sure they were centered;
      Commitment to inner peace was there.

      Their intentions were clear; they took time to think; And,
      wrote down those desires in clear black ink.

      And most of all they rested knowing they had support;
      Whenever they asked, people came forth.

      So I sit pen to paper and wish you all
      a blessed season of light
      and the most wonderful New Year's of all!

      All the best to you and yours,

      Karen Valencic

    38. With a big smile and thanks to all, I wish everyone "Happy Healthy Holidays and a fantastic year ahead!!!

      I will put my vote in for the positive poetry, or comments, that is, if my vote counts!!! 🙂

    39. Twas The Night Before Christmas ... again!

      ‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through the U.S.;
      The economy was tanking, and things were a mess.

      The stockings were hung by the chimney with care;
      Hoping for coal, because the fuel tanks were bare.

      The government health care plan wasn’t looking like a winner;
      Resembling nine wolves and a sheep, voting on what’s for dinner.

      The media had all the meaty issues it could handle;
      Keeping their focus on the Tiger sex scandal.

      When out on the lawn, there arose such a racket;
      (A man in a red suit, from a much higher tax bracket!)

      So straight to the window I ran in a hurry;
      And I peeked – for I had to, through all of my worry

      When I finally saw him, I recognized the sage;
      It was … “Wait – it couldn’t be! … yes – twas RANDY GAGE!”

      I got all excited and started to stutter;
      My palms became sweaty and my heart was a-flutter.

      He said, “Hello Dear One, I bring you kind greetings”;
      “You’ve been a loyal student, it was time for our meeting.”

      “You’ve dreamed, you’ve envisioned, you’ve aligned with your brilliance”;
      It was you that brought me here, due to all your resilliance!

      I love how you’ve worked on controlling your thoughts;
      And become very positive, just the way that I’ve taught!

      The world may look scary and grim to the masses;
      But you’re right on track to join the great upper-classes!

      So I’ve brought you a gift in this happiest of seasons;
      And you truly have earned it - for so many reasons

      This is only a token of the wealth you deserve;
      So consider it a down payment in your unending reserves.

      There will be much more coming as you expand expectations;
      The world is your oyster, your canvas, your creation.

      And I see you’ve discovered that life’s meant to be fun!;
      Not just for the lucky, but for each and every one.

      So I brought you this check for a cool hundred grand;
      Delivered by yours truly … like the Universe planned!

      You know you’ve been asking for more prosperity;
      Bet you never imagined it would be delivered by … ME!

      Now use it toward greatness and make sure you enjoy it;
      Oh yes, and spend wisely … be sure to employ it!

      This is your proof of the Law of Attraction;
      But remember the next step is … you must take some action!

      And Dear, if you’re wondering what this is doing for me;
      I’m tithing my millions, quite generously!

      I have plenty of money – but it needs circulation;
      And with this visit finished – I am off on vacation!

      Now I bid you farewell, this sleigh’s not as fast my Viper;
      I’ve still far to travel and the reindeer are hyper.

      So I leave you with wishes of abundance and cheer;
      I can hardly wait to see just what you do with this year!

      Wishing you many rich blessings in the coming year and always!!!

      KimbraLee =)

    40. When out on the lawn, arose such a racket;
      Pelosi and Reid were looking at my car, trying to tax it.
      I ran to my desk and hid my checkbook in a flash;
      I yelled to mama, “quick, hide all our cash”.

      When what to my wondering eyes should appear;
      But an opportunity for freedom if I bust my ass for a year.
      I needed some training, a mentor and quick;
      Research led me to a bald guy in Florida who is kind of slick.

      Trying to soar with the eagles and not be so lame;
      He prods and pushes but does not know my name.
      Now affirm, now mantra, now market don’t sell;
      Wear a button or sticker and end in MLM hell!

      To the top of the comp plan, now climb that wall!
      Two a day for freedom, now that is all!
      As dry leaves before the wild hurricane fly;
      When I meet a new obstacle, I mount to the sky.

      I speak not a word and go straight to my work;
      Sometimes my wife thinks I’m some kind of jerk.
      But each day freedom gets closer and continue to grow;
      All from the seeds that Rohn once did sow.

      Gage has shown the reward of true hustle;
      And to share an opportunity does not take much muscle.
      But I heard him exclaim as he drove a Viper out of sight;
      “Believe in yourself and to all a prosperous night!”

      Merry Christmas RG, thanks for the gifts all year.

    41. The night before Christamis and there was not a sound in the house until old saint nick came in and still everybody was sound a sleep. the next day was the best day of the whole year.

    42. ...when four strange men wearing funny hats came walking up to me. They seemed somehow familiar and yet so different. A mix of scary and piousness.
      One of them wore a gold bar as he reached towards me.
      - We have come to offer you a different life than what you lived so far. If you accept this gift and If you are ready to follow us ordinary people from different walks of life you need no longer be a slave to your insecurity. Our approach gives you freedom. If you refrain from receiving our gift, we can reassure you that nothing will change , everything will be as it was settled though even worse. Unfortunately if so, we will offer the next person this solid goldbar. What will be your choice?

    43. When up on my lawn, arose such a racket
      There on my house top, stook Margaret Thatcher
      Ronnie was looking at her with care
      saying socialism is not what we want here
      Now, Margaret, quick as a wink, go
      and tell Washington what we all think.

    44. I had to comment here because I am in awe of the cleverness, creativity, and thoughtfulness of everyone who had the courage and brilliance in continuing with the rest of the poem. It's sooo cool! I keep on coming back here to read more poems!

      I can see how many people really respect you and take on your teaching seriously and have made it their own. I loved reading everyone's input and the poems were all simply brilliant! I love the power of leveraging other people's skills. There is so much talent out there!

      Thank you for this wonderful Christmas gift. It made me so proud to get to know you Randy and to get to know those around you who strive to make this industry shine.

    45. And that night before Christmas no money in the bank,
      broken down car with no gas in the tank,
      people out shopping for gifts to give,
      I'm out shoplifting for food to live,
      the economy is looking better that's what they say,
      i see no difference still look like we're in the gray.
      I burned my last meal,
      So I took a sleeping pill,
      And that was the night before Christmas.

    46. Well, I was never much on Christmas so my mind is not into finishing the poem but I love getting together with my two children and now 1 grandbaby and unfortunately baby's daddy's couldn't be with us because of violent behavior and hopefully will get help but we had a nice meal and everyone was safe and the my younger daughter's boyfriend brought cookies which I haven't had in such a long time cause I found out I can't eat good stuff cause of high cholesterol but we had a great Christmas Eve even though I have no income . I made a good meal and ate cookies cause I have been working out 4 or 5 times a week and watching my fat intake and I very well deserve something tasty once in a while in my life. My family together, a good meal, sitting watching a silly movie "Aliens vs. Monsters" and cookies was a great Christmas Eve for me and my family.

    47. When out on the lawn, arose such a racket;
      You wanted a picture but I did grab a jacket
      Option C is a dancing inside of my head
      The thought of you sleeping with me in my bed
      The tease is fun and I couldn’t resist
      But now the poem heads back to Santa’s Christmas List
      Into the future of two thousand and ten
      Where men scared of change won’t step out of their pen
      We dream of a future that’s bright and of hope
      But most won’t dare change and again remain a dope
      If only they knew small steps taken are needed
      So life would be lived instead of just cheated
      Lessons learned from the past should make us take better care
      To realize the economy is not the bad air
      Will lessons of past bring a brighter future near
      They will if they listen to Randy and hear
      That life is a gift and we’ll prosper and grow
      If steps that we take are steady and slow
      The race will be won even if you stumble…
      And grab life’s true blessings, being thankful and humble.

    48. When arose from the Congress (all high in tax bracket),came the sound of health reform-Jeezus what a racket!

      With no "Payer Option",I'm thinkin' we're screwed, when Santa arrived,and said "Listen up,Dude!"

      He said "I know you all believed, in O-bama's promise, of health care reform, by Jove and St. Thomas! But as it's lookin' now, the reform's for the worse, so put your 'Pie In The Sky' ideas where they belong--in a hearse!"

      "Take it from me, it's more than a hunch,that it's true what they say: No Such Thing As Free Lunch! The "O-Man"'s a politician,and aren't they quite a bunch? They promise the SKY,and deliver the DIRT-so bend over, say 'Ah'- this might slightly hurt!"

      "There's BIG BUCKS at play here, make no mistake. And the Health Care folks? They haul it in with a rake! If you think they'll roll over, then for you I've got news-good old Obama is messin' with the "Golden Egg Laying Goose"!

      "You see-people think I bring free stuff,that's true. (Even Agnostic,Muslim and Jew!) If you believe that, my friend,you're living a lie-ya' want somthin' fer nuthin?- Oh dear and oh my. No--you get what you pay for,like it or not,which puts our old Prez in a pretty bad spot. He's damned if he do,and damned if he don't: Think he'll put HIS neck in the noose?-I think he won't! "

      "Most likely he'll wheel,and deal, and such-and all those promises he made?-they were a bit overmuch. There's a story about politics,and this might make you grieve,the name of the story? "Ali Baba and The 40 Thieves!"

      "So roll up your sleeves,and let's get to work-'cuz politics is for suckers, The Naive, and the jerks. Take it from me,one who's been around,keep your eyes in your head,and your feet on the ground.
      Be like my elves-they make their OWN toys,they don't put all their eggs in the basket of a guy from Illinois!"

      "You might be saying "where's your spirit,Mr.Claus? All this reality is giving us pause: Keep THIS up,and we won't laud YOU with applause!'

      "You want some advice, from good old St. Nick? Listen up 'yall,and let your ears prick. Create your won reality,to the extent you can. That way,you won't have to depend on "The Man". Use your own talents,I'm sure you have lots,though you might have heard different,from the gurus and crack-pots. It's never too late,to live the life of your dream,though you might have to disentangle yourself from the main-stream. Will it be hard? Yes,at times. You'll encounter lot's of B.S.,and silly nursery rhymes. Get used to working,and pursuing your dreams,get strong,get smart- and if you have to: GET MEAN! Be in control, of YOUR OWN HEALTH,and come to think of it-your happiness, relationships and wealth. Be your own "Santa"-it can be done- You might work alone,and be the only one. But in the long run you'll be happy,and will be in the right.
      And to you dear Reader-

      Merry Christmas and GOOD NIGHT!!!

    49. DEAR RANDY,

      I WAS WONDERING WHY YOU POSTED SUCH A POEM FOR CHRISTMAS, SO I AM NOT ABLE TO COMPLETE IT. IT HAS A LOT OF NEGATIVE ISSUES MAY BE HARD REALITIES OF LIFE.

      I KNOW THERE MUST BE SOME GOOD REASONS BEHIND THIS POEM AS YOU ARE VERY MUCH IN CONTROL OF THINGS YOU SAY AND DO.

      I AM FROM INDIA AND LOOKING FORWARD TO AN OPPORTUNITY TO MEET YOU AS EARLY AS POSSIBLE, I BADLY NEED TO MET YOU SOON, I NEED YOUR HELP TO GUIDE ME, READY TO DO WHATEVER YOU SAY. I NEED A CHANGE BADLY.

      THANKS A LOT

    50. When out on the lawn, arose such a racket,
      I said, oh dear look... another Secret Service
      replacement. Dressed another up in a red suit and Teddy. How ready we all are to bring some balance to life. Now that, Healthcare worked it's way into government hands... can we rest easy now, is this the Universes plan? Now not to worry, I'm not selfish anymore, we opened our door and fed the homeless on the Jersey Shore. Now.. wishes to all a Safe and Happy Holiday Season.... Thank You!!!! Good Night!!!

    51. I think this one's Brilliant! I think it should win...it's captured the spirit and forced me to grin...I'm glad all are trying to get on the game....but this one's a winner, John deserves fame!

      Happy Holidays all and powerful 2010 to ya!! Poppy

    52. When out on the lawn, arose such a racket,
      So I jumped to my feet and threw on my jacket.
      I ran to the window and to my surprise
      Was a goofy French bulldog with big bugged out eyes

      He said I am the “Christmas pup from future and past”
      And I’m here to set some things straight at long last.
      I don’t have much time so listen real close
      Turn on your recorder and take down some notes.

      You see I’m not just a dog with really big ears
      I’m a magical pup that flies through the years.
      Both backwards an forwards and all in between
      You wouldn’t believe what these big eyes have seen

      I’ve been around for many a year
      And I’m her to spread some real Christmas Cheer.
      Your TVs and pod casts and cell phones and such
      Have gone overboard with the with the negative touch

      We’ve all been handed a big crock of poop
      About the world situation… well here’s the real scoop
      It just may be true that the world has some problems
      But it’s also true that we can and will solve them.

      I may not have thumbs but I can still count to ten
      And we can all get us out of this mess that were in
      I may chase my tail but at least I’m not complaining
      Or sitting around making excuses and blaming

      The truth of the matter is it’s time to go nuts
      Get some things done… and get of our butts
      Instead of looking at how the economy is so slow
      Open your eyes and look where we want to go

      And if you have trouble focusing in that direction
      Just find a way that you can make a connection
      With others that may not have the good fortune or good luck
      Reach back and help them pull themselves up

      You can’t help someone get to the top shelf
      Without getting a little closer yourself
      The truth of the matter is there’s still lots of money
      It’s just in other paces and I’m not being funny

      Here’s some advice sp please get behind it
      If you want more stuff just g out and find it
      There’s still lots of hope and there’s still virtue
      Just look around and I swear it won’t hurt you.

      There’s still lots of people that really do care
      There’s still lots of people who genuinely care

      God gave you humans a remarkable ability
      Of creating your future with grace and humility
      Why you don’t use it is beyond me I swear
      I guess it’s just easier to whine and be scared

      But I’m telling you here and I’m telling you now
      Follow your dreams and you’ll find them some how
      I’ve noticed that people just seem to forget it
      That the universe is here to help if you let it

      So help one another you silly human beings
      And turn off the negative garbage you’re seeing
      It doesn’t take a genius to see there’s no gain
      By focusing on drama and turmoil and pain

      So gather your courage, your wisdom, your guts
      And stand up and pull your heads out of your butts

      Then that dog jumped about ten feet in the air
      Waved his paws all around like he just didn’t care
      He said I’ve got one last stop before I go home
      I’ve got to stop at the white house to burry a bone.

      Then he clicked his heals twice and pointed up high
      Then like a rocket he shot through the sky

      You might not believe me what happened that night
      But I can still hear the last thing he said as he shot out of sight

      The grass will still grow if you don’t bother it
      But it’s always much greener right where you water it

    53. I have to rethink...my vote went to John...but now reading this...I just come undone...time to regroup...think this all thru....maybe I can vote for two?!

    54. I have to agree with Randy, this was great! I'm not a poet so I didn't participate, so I just enjoyed everyone else's efforts.

      Take care and have a Happy and Very Prosperous New Year!

      Lucinda The Operadiva

    55. When out on the lawn, arose such a racket,
      I am so sad now, emptiness in my heart pocket,
      Looking after the beauty of life, where it is?
      I was full enough to believe that there is bliss...

      I can't continue anymore, I'm not an English speaker, so I don't want to spoil it, I love English!

      Randy, I know that I am out of the subject, but I still need just a quarter of the prize to can live further... With all the shame that i feel, I must try to get out of my situation, so I gived it a shut...
      I am now where you was once, so I hope that you will read this and, if it is possible, help me.
      Here in my country it is hard to get up, but I will...
      Blessings,

    56. HI RANDY...

      I AM FROM CAMBODIA. I WISH TO JOIN WITH THIS COMPETITION, BUT I AM NOT GOOD AT POEM. BESIDES MY ENGLISH STILL LIMIT.

      ANY OTHER CHANCE TO WIN A COMPETITION?

      I DREAM TO MEET YOU IN PERSONS IN YOUR EARIEST CONVENIENCE. I WISH TO HEAR YOUR VOICE AND I NEED YOUR GUIDANCE.

      I WISH YOU FOR A WONDERFUL AND PROSPEROUS NEW YEAR 2010!

      Soursdey

    57. hi randy
      plase send me seminar dubai palinure international
      tanks

      Merry Christmas & Happy New Year to Randy! Love.

    58. salam mojgan joon
      mage ma mordim ke mikhay ba randy sex koni
      ye gharar bezar bebinin hamdigaro shayad toonestim doostay khoobi vase ham beshim

      mohammad

    59. ‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through the U.S.;
      The economy was tanking, and things were a mess.
      The stockings were hung by the chimney with care;
      Hoping for coal, because the fuel tanks were bare.

      The government health care plan wasn’t looking like a winner;
      Resembling nine wolves and a sheep, voting on what’s for dinner.
      The media had all the meaty issues it could handle;
      Keeping their focus on the Tiger sex scandal.

      When out on the lawn, arose such a racket;
      The white House became a hut of the uncle of Volume;
      But burn newspapers and throw out the TV;
      Trust in Santa Klausa and it will necessarily come!

    60. ...And people run away to their home
      cause of cold and dark rainy night

      there was a wish that night like last year:
      "This year is another one but not like the others
      the world will become better
      the man health will improve
      and the PEASE is the GOAL"

      Regards
      Mahdi

    61. JEG SØGER 2 PIGER SOM SKAL BO HOS .MEJ OG I FOR DET GOT OG I KAN RINGE PÅ 24208019 DØJTE RUNT.OG DET GØR IKKE NOGET AT I ER MØRKE.OG I SKAL KUNE TALE DANSK.

    62. Thanks for another interesting article Randy! If you require a <a href="http://www.festivechristmasjumpers.co.uk">christmas jumpers</a> then please feel free to visit our site - Merry Christmas Randy!

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