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The Gift

Posted By: Randy GageAugust 29, 2011

The pain has faded, but I can still remember it almost like it was yesterday.  I was driving down the highway in a friend’s car, my body wracked with sobs.  My restaurant had been auctioned off at the courthouse, and I had no job, no money, and I thought, nowhere to turn.

I didn’t know what I was going to do for a living or how I was going to eat.  It was a horrifying feeling, thinking of the humiliation I would feel telling my family and friends that I had failed.  Again.  It seemed like the worst thing that had ever happened to me.

Which of course means it was worse than the previous “worst” thing that had ever happened to me.  And it stayed that way until a few years later, when I was shot and left for dead, which then qualified as the new “worst” thing that had ever happened to me.

But of course you’ve probably already figured out, these “worst” things invariably were the best things that ever happened…

Now of course, it sure doesn’t feel that way when you’re going through stuff, does it? 

But if those tax authorities hadn’t seized my restaurant, I’d still be working 80 hours a week, in a life of quiet desperation.  All of the dysfunctional relationships I was in were triggers to help me discover what I didn’t like in myself.  The financial hardships caused me to begin the study of prosperity that has led to my assignment in life.

And the night I almost died changed my outlook on life forever.  Stare down death and you will never see a sunrise,  sunset, or goodbye kiss the same way again.   You’ll never take another day for granted; never settle for merely getting by in life when you can be really living it.

So what about you?

Do you believe the challenges you face are stepping-stones to who you need to become, or just feel you’re being victimized?  Are you learning the lessons the universe is sending you, or rationalizing them away?   Do you blame your spouse, boss, government, economy, or society for the stuff that happens to you – or look within to see the real gift they offer you?

-RG

 

27 comments on “The Gift”

  1. Love it RG!
    Everything that seems like a road block, i take as another lesson learned. Am done with the blame game and take full responsibility for everything that happens to me.

  2. This came at a very opportune time when my life is taking a turn I don't quite understand, nonetheless I know in my heart just like your writing is expressing, that is all happening for the clarification of my assignment in this life. It seems mad sometimes, it feels like the Universe, God himself is trying very hard to relieve me of all attachments (material and emotional) all the same anyhow. I pray that the lessons I'm required to learn come to pass soon because I also see how other people get affected or blocked for my inability to move forward when I have to. With God's blessing it will all work out because I'm open and willing to to accept my gifts with humbleness, joy and love.

  3. Divine timing. I just received a rejection for a submitted proposal. I didn't feel defeated, though. I was just thinking that an alternate route or opportunity will present itself...then your email came.

    This rejection is hardly one of the worst things that ever happened to me and doesn't compare to your past experiences. However, it does represent one of life's little curveballs that test our responses. (Notice I say responses and not reactions. Entirely different concepts.) Every challenge brings value. It's up to us to be conscious enough to recognize it.

  4. Yes, I suppose that I still do some blaming of others when I should be looking at the man in the mirror. Looking back it much easier to see how things worked out. The real challenge/opportunity is to make the most out of it while you're in the middle of the "worst thing".
    What we do right now, can prepare us to handle our next worst thing better.

  5. "Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, and today is a gift, that's why they call it the present."

    With that said though, it's really hard to see it during difficult times.

    Thanks for the reminder 🙂

  6. Everyone has days where it all just seems too much - I think the important thing is to pick yourself up and keep on trying. Blaming other people is just a waste of energy

  7. It took me a while Randy, but I'm so happy and grateful that I have learned through the xperiences of my life.

    It's a process of eventually finding your self and letting go of all the stuff that kept you re creating the same old circumstances over, and over.

    So glad I woke up!

    Thank You for the work you do.

  8. I am slowly learning that lesson now. Instead of seeing anything as a failure I see it as another stepping stone closer to my ultimate goal. I realize it is not for me to judge a situation but to live through it and press on.

  9. Very pivotal topic in my life currently. The last three years have been my own worst of the worst sh*t storms, however, I echo your learning and transformation.

    The past three years have been one thing after another, but it's also when I decided to live life my way, so I know it's a shift that has to occur.

    That said, I feel like everyday holds a lesson in some way or another. I now see my own sh*t storms are the Universe's way of leading me down the path to my own purpose.

    Had I not been through the storms I have in the last three years, I certainly wouldn't be living the life I am filled with happiness, joy, and simply staying present with gratitude...even when sometimes the conditions aren't perfect.

    1. Liked your references to sh*t storms! I can relate!But I really enjoyed your last reflection with staying in the present with graditude! Since I started reading this blog just a few short weeks ago, it has been inspiring. My mottos of late, since I'm so tired of living in a sh*t storm is...it hasn't been working so far, somethings got to change and that's me! So out with the old and in with the new! The waves don't seem as turbulent! Joy to you and yours!

  10. I also had my best gift. it came 2009 brought by the cops, while I was sitting on the toilet. Some sort of thing, that really make me change my live, to avoid another incident like that.

    Much Love Alexa

  11. Very cool post Randy! Yep, you did it again.
    We all have to take full responsibility of our life. Whatever we have we attracted into our life by the way we think and "feel" about everything.
    We gotta welcome every single experience in our lives as a teaching.

    1. Wow, what an interesting point of you: >whatever we attracted into our life by the way we think and "feel" about everything<.
      I really have to get that straight for my task, which is still a bit unclear to me. I received something which I personally didn´t create - phew...good point, at some point -

  12. great article....people must take full responsibility for their lives...all obstacles have a positive solution behind them, you just have to be willing to look for it.

  13. It seems to me, as a person who has lived through several types of abuse while growing up, that victimhood is a stage - and yes, some people get stuck in it. For example, if you have been molested or raped - you have been victimized. And, when the pain subsides, room opens up to see it on a spiritual level and victimhood dissolves into acceptance and wisdom. Should we not hold compassion for those who remain stuck there for some time or should we point our fingers and say "you shouldn't be here-you're being a victim!!" It is often just a slight reframing or perspective shift that is needed to improve things. Some people don't get that kind of opportunity or they are too low to pick it up. Either way, I lean toward compassion - it is Love that heals hearts - anything else just makes it worse. When I feel hurt by the behaviour of someone, I allow myself to feel it - I cry, and have time away to process the experience. The question always arises - what is the lesson in this? First and foremost - I let myself feel. That's just my own understanding so far. Thanks for the post, Randy.

      1. Thanks Randy - that was kind of you to say and also that you created a space for some heart-felt sharing. Your sensitivity is appreciated.

  14. Hi RG,

    Super inspiration here. Some never realize you are who you because of how you respond to what life throws at you...or how you respond to what you created.

    I wrote 1000 inspirational quotes within a series of hours, after I was horribly depressed and contemplating suicide. My greatest surges in growth came after I went bankrupt, was sued by creditors and saw my net worth dive to 4 cents.

    I was in such a mess each low seemed to be a new low, until I viewed these lows as blessings. I never would have tapped into my talents if I hadn't been broken down the way I needed to be broken down. It was wake up call after wake up call, and I kept hitting the snooze button.

    Finally, I woke up, and I learned the worst things are the best things to happen to us. Break Down, Build Up is the creative process. I started to work on myself ALL THE TIME, not when I felt like it, or when it was convenient, but like every hour, on the hour, visualizing, affirming, meditating, doing all that good stuff. Then my lower self became gradually introduced to my higher self.

    Thanks for sharing your inspiration Randy!

    RB

  15. Being responsible for your life hurts.
    I lost two dogs (pugs..sob) in two weeks. One got under my husbands truck at the wrong minute and the other got out a small hole in the fence looking for the first one.
    I'm devastated. I could blame my husband for not being more careful. I was mad at my son for not fixing the hole after being asked several times. But when it came right down to it, it was up to me to think ahead and be responsible for the lives that were in my care. The dogs should be in a crate or safe place when I'm not home. I knew the hole was there ...I even thought about it when I let the dog out the door..I should have fixed it myself. No one is more responsible for the outcome than myself. A painful lesson.

  16. I'm real big on letting my experiences be a lesson to me. I was going to say good or bad but that's not the most accurate description. Pleasurable or not in the moment; all experiences are only good. It may be up to me to find the good in it but the good is always there.
    Seek and ye shall find.

    Wonderful post with such an important teaching!

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  • 27 comments on “The Gift”

    1. Love it RG!
      Everything that seems like a road block, i take as another lesson learned. Am done with the blame game and take full responsibility for everything that happens to me.

    2. This came at a very opportune time when my life is taking a turn I don't quite understand, nonetheless I know in my heart just like your writing is expressing, that is all happening for the clarification of my assignment in this life. It seems mad sometimes, it feels like the Universe, God himself is trying very hard to relieve me of all attachments (material and emotional) all the same anyhow. I pray that the lessons I'm required to learn come to pass soon because I also see how other people get affected or blocked for my inability to move forward when I have to. With God's blessing it will all work out because I'm open and willing to to accept my gifts with humbleness, joy and love.

    3. Divine timing. I just received a rejection for a submitted proposal. I didn't feel defeated, though. I was just thinking that an alternate route or opportunity will present itself...then your email came.

      This rejection is hardly one of the worst things that ever happened to me and doesn't compare to your past experiences. However, it does represent one of life's little curveballs that test our responses. (Notice I say responses and not reactions. Entirely different concepts.) Every challenge brings value. It's up to us to be conscious enough to recognize it.

    4. Yes, I suppose that I still do some blaming of others when I should be looking at the man in the mirror. Looking back it much easier to see how things worked out. The real challenge/opportunity is to make the most out of it while you're in the middle of the "worst thing".
      What we do right now, can prepare us to handle our next worst thing better.

    5. "Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, and today is a gift, that's why they call it the present."

      With that said though, it's really hard to see it during difficult times.

      Thanks for the reminder 🙂

    6. Everyone has days where it all just seems too much - I think the important thing is to pick yourself up and keep on trying. Blaming other people is just a waste of energy

    7. It took me a while Randy, but I'm so happy and grateful that I have learned through the xperiences of my life.

      It's a process of eventually finding your self and letting go of all the stuff that kept you re creating the same old circumstances over, and over.

      So glad I woke up!

      Thank You for the work you do.

    8. I am slowly learning that lesson now. Instead of seeing anything as a failure I see it as another stepping stone closer to my ultimate goal. I realize it is not for me to judge a situation but to live through it and press on.

    9. Very pivotal topic in my life currently. The last three years have been my own worst of the worst sh*t storms, however, I echo your learning and transformation.

      The past three years have been one thing after another, but it's also when I decided to live life my way, so I know it's a shift that has to occur.

      That said, I feel like everyday holds a lesson in some way or another. I now see my own sh*t storms are the Universe's way of leading me down the path to my own purpose.

      Had I not been through the storms I have in the last three years, I certainly wouldn't be living the life I am filled with happiness, joy, and simply staying present with gratitude...even when sometimes the conditions aren't perfect.

      1. Liked your references to sh*t storms! I can relate!But I really enjoyed your last reflection with staying in the present with graditude! Since I started reading this blog just a few short weeks ago, it has been inspiring. My mottos of late, since I'm so tired of living in a sh*t storm is...it hasn't been working so far, somethings got to change and that's me! So out with the old and in with the new! The waves don't seem as turbulent! Joy to you and yours!

    10. I also had my best gift. it came 2009 brought by the cops, while I was sitting on the toilet. Some sort of thing, that really make me change my live, to avoid another incident like that.

      Much Love Alexa

    11. Very cool post Randy! Yep, you did it again.
      We all have to take full responsibility of our life. Whatever we have we attracted into our life by the way we think and "feel" about everything.
      We gotta welcome every single experience in our lives as a teaching.

      1. Wow, what an interesting point of you: >whatever we attracted into our life by the way we think and "feel" about everything<.
        I really have to get that straight for my task, which is still a bit unclear to me. I received something which I personally didn´t create - phew...good point, at some point -

    12. great article....people must take full responsibility for their lives...all obstacles have a positive solution behind them, you just have to be willing to look for it.

    13. It seems to me, as a person who has lived through several types of abuse while growing up, that victimhood is a stage - and yes, some people get stuck in it. For example, if you have been molested or raped - you have been victimized. And, when the pain subsides, room opens up to see it on a spiritual level and victimhood dissolves into acceptance and wisdom. Should we not hold compassion for those who remain stuck there for some time or should we point our fingers and say "you shouldn't be here-you're being a victim!!" It is often just a slight reframing or perspective shift that is needed to improve things. Some people don't get that kind of opportunity or they are too low to pick it up. Either way, I lean toward compassion - it is Love that heals hearts - anything else just makes it worse. When I feel hurt by the behaviour of someone, I allow myself to feel it - I cry, and have time away to process the experience. The question always arises - what is the lesson in this? First and foremost - I let myself feel. That's just my own understanding so far. Thanks for the post, Randy.

        1. Thanks Randy - that was kind of you to say and also that you created a space for some heart-felt sharing. Your sensitivity is appreciated.

    14. Hi RG,

      Super inspiration here. Some never realize you are who you because of how you respond to what life throws at you...or how you respond to what you created.

      I wrote 1000 inspirational quotes within a series of hours, after I was horribly depressed and contemplating suicide. My greatest surges in growth came after I went bankrupt, was sued by creditors and saw my net worth dive to 4 cents.

      I was in such a mess each low seemed to be a new low, until I viewed these lows as blessings. I never would have tapped into my talents if I hadn't been broken down the way I needed to be broken down. It was wake up call after wake up call, and I kept hitting the snooze button.

      Finally, I woke up, and I learned the worst things are the best things to happen to us. Break Down, Build Up is the creative process. I started to work on myself ALL THE TIME, not when I felt like it, or when it was convenient, but like every hour, on the hour, visualizing, affirming, meditating, doing all that good stuff. Then my lower self became gradually introduced to my higher self.

      Thanks for sharing your inspiration Randy!

      RB

    15. Being responsible for your life hurts.
      I lost two dogs (pugs..sob) in two weeks. One got under my husbands truck at the wrong minute and the other got out a small hole in the fence looking for the first one.
      I'm devastated. I could blame my husband for not being more careful. I was mad at my son for not fixing the hole after being asked several times. But when it came right down to it, it was up to me to think ahead and be responsible for the lives that were in my care. The dogs should be in a crate or safe place when I'm not home. I knew the hole was there ...I even thought about it when I let the dog out the door..I should have fixed it myself. No one is more responsible for the outcome than myself. A painful lesson.

    16. I'm real big on letting my experiences be a lesson to me. I was going to say good or bad but that's not the most accurate description. Pleasurable or not in the moment; all experiences are only good. It may be up to me to find the good in it but the good is always there.
      Seek and ye shall find.

      Wonderful post with such an important teaching!

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