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Start an Exciting Career as a Hotel Architect!

Posted By: Randy GageDecember 6, 2009

Well I’m on another European tour, visiting seven countries in eight days.  And after the hotels I’ve stayed in this trip, I’ve learned a lot about how they are designed.  So if you ever dreamed of a lucrative career as an architect, here’s all you need to know!

Be sure and place the one air conditioning grill so it blows exactly on the head of the guest as they sit at the desk.  This helps cool down the hot heads that might normally complain about missed wake up calls and slow room service.

Never put more than two electric outlets in a room.  Place one behind the bed, and the other behind the TV cabinet.  This forces many guests to use battery power and helps conserve energy.

Also place the Internet Ethernet cord receptacle behind the TV cabinet as well.   This forces people to move the cabinet, giving them more exercise and discouraging a sedentary lifestyle.  Or even better, eliminate the Ethernet option and install a weak Wi-Fi signal so guests have to carry their laptop around the room searching for reception or stand in the window trying to pick up the signal from the Starbucks across the street.

Instead of a shower curtain or door, use a piece of glass that only covers half the opening like the trendy boutique hotels do.  This causes all the water to splash out saturating the floor.  This way the guests use all the extra towels to mop it up, discouraging too much conservation, which eliminates jobs.

Construct the closest only two feet deep.  This way when they close the door it crushes the shoulders of all their suits and shirts.  Once they realize the iron provided in the room couldn’t melt a slice of cheese, they’ll end up sending out the laundry, providing more revenue for the hotel.

Build the property so none of the windows in the guest rooms open.  This increases use of the heating and air conditioning, providing more jobs for the government stimulus programs.

Put steps at the main entrance and a small revolving door.  This discourages guests from bringing luggage, making it easier for the bellmen.

Plan room sizes so there is only ten inches of space between the bed and the TV cabinet, so no one can pull a suitcase through.  This encourages people to travel lighter and takes a burden off the airlines.

Build the desk facing a blank wall.  This ensures people won’t be distracted by the view and they will get more work done on the road.

Spec the water heaters so they are the appropriate size for a duplex.   This way the water in the showers modulates between scalding hot and icy cold, promoting better cardiovascular circulation.

Buy lumpy, used mattresses from motel bankruptcy sales.  This helps the less fortunate and saves money for your employer.

Construct the shower and tub surrounded by a wall three feet high and 12 inches wide.  This forces guests to get in better shape and develop flexibility, particularly the elderly and infirm ones.

Also cut back on the elevators.  During big conventions the half hour wait will force more guests to take the stairs and promote better health.

Specify half-inch drywall between rooms.  This way if a guest’s TV is out of order, they can listen to the programs from the next room.  And if the desk clerk forgets to make their wake up call, the guest will hear the one from the next room.  Just this very trip, I forgot my iPod, but fortunately I could hear someone singing in the next room!

Place the rooms around the elevator shaft, above the nightclub, and next to noisy ice machines.  This causes the guests to sleep lighter, so less wake up calls are required.

Meeting rooms…

A big part of the hotel business is the revenue provided by functions.  So follow these recommendations when designing the meeting facilities:

Use loud, clunky doors for all function rooms.  These provide diversions for meeting attendees while the speakers are droning on.

Put lots of columns and pillars in the meeting space so participants have to crane their neck every time the speaker moves.  This keeps them more attentive.

Wire the rooms with inexpensive speakers from Radio Shack.  This way they will be blown after the first wedding reception, forcing people to pay better attention.

Be sure to install thin air walls between all rooms.  This way attendees forced to attend evening seminars can rock along with the DJs in the adjoining graduation and holiday parties.

Now I realize a lot of your architects reading this think it’s all just common sense.  But you would be amazed to find that some architects actually design properties with the guests' comfort and convenience in mind.  This fosters laziness and sloth.  But if you will just follow these simple guidelines, the hospitality industry will prosper, and you’ll have no shortage of hotel chains seeking your services!

41 comments on “Start an Exciting Career as a Hotel Architect!”

  1. Randy,

    I laughed so hard at your comments. But everything you say is true. As an architect, I try to leave very few things to the imagination of my engineering subconsultants. The outlets are a case in point. If I do not layout the outlets with the client before I send the drawings to the electrical engineers for final plans, I am likely to get something just like you described.

    I always layout the furniture in a room before I do the details and then this will determine where to put items such as outlets, A/C units, etc.

    When I was younger I would be much more trusting of engineers, but now I watch them like a hawk. After a couple of items I saw the contractor installing to my amazement and horror as I walked around a construction project, I try never to leave anything to the imagination of my engineers and, God forbid, even less to the general contractor.

    Sometimes though, it's neither a design or engineering error, the problem is something that was generated by too cheap a budget (1/2" drywall, for example). Or maybe this was a remodeled building and the columns were there already and necessary to hold up the building (this is very important). So sometimes, we inherit problems that we did not create.

    But you certainly gave me a good laugh,
    Maria Luisa

  2. Another detail I've noticed in luxury hotels -- upscale glass shower doors that only open door out, so you will bunch up the bath mat as you exit the shower. Or the bathroom lights on an auto on/off switch so when you enter they go on and and then off a few minutes after you exit. If you are reading while soaking in the tub soon you will be in total darkness unless you flail your arms around every few minutes. Very relaxing -- not!

  3. LOL! I take it you didn't stay at any Four Seasons on your trip? 🙂

    While definitely not cheap, it's one of the very few hotel chains that "gets it". Our local Four Seasons Hotel & Resort here in Dallas is to date still my favorite (we like to take long weekends there now and then), but Jennifer and I have always been impressed by their quality of service and the experience, regardless of location.

    Have an awesome day!
    Dan

  4. Hilarious!

    Noticed many of the things you pointed out, along my travels... particularly the head-cooling stations (sites appointed for writings, under an airvent) and recepticle units designed to promote physical activity/stretching of tendons and musculature while also providing electrical current.....

    Thank you for the chuckles,
    Nancy

  5. Being a Hotelier for the last 44 years Randy I know how you feel. It boils down to the owners planning the Hotel before inviting the professionals (like GM''s and Hotel engineers) on board. When we come in the picture, the Hotels are designed by architects who design normally apartments or other buildings but have never designed a Hotel before. I could add another 200 items to your list ,but I have no time to do so, as you will come to my Hotel next year (Malaysia) and I have to design new cupboards,rewire the entire Hotel, relocate air conditioners and increase the number of lifts we have. Nevertheless looking forward to see you again (and so does Poh Li) I am Franz and I am AGEL.

  6. Whew... and you have to pay for all that, too. I actually find the best hotels for business and other trips is the older hotels through Priceline.

    Older generation hotels have windows that open, don't try to be pretentious, and are often twice or more the size of current generation "upscale" rooms, and have nice comfy amenities.

    Also the staff is usually quite friendly and pleasant and agreeable... after all, it takes a lot of stiffening energy to be "pretentious". Plus the corporate management probably makes everybody sit up and be nervous.... just can't relax with those bottom-line counters watching every move.

    And with Priceline pricing, it comes to often a quarter of the price for a cramped, tight-fitting, "prison-like" feeling modern room.

    I have had the best stays in my career through Priceline.

    _____

    Alas, it used to be so with air tickets. I could buy a nice coach ticket on priceline, on a half empty plane, and have 3 full seats to lie out on. Much roomier than the old 1st class. Now, alas, it all seems to be some degree of cattle-car squeeze in. I prefer to fly less... the trip from Houston with the 400 pound woman in the next seat, half burying me, really did me in for wanting to fly very much any more....Well, at least I was warm.... returning to frigid NY after warm Houston. All that body fat covering half my seat did that.

    Aah, the joys of tele-conferencing.....

    Disclosure: I do NOT make any money in any way whatsoever for telling my "Testimonial" of Priceline. I trust this statement is FTC compliant under the latest rules.

    ****

    Another option I treasure is the little Mom & Pop overgrown home-stay type hotels. While our group members might pay $350/nite for a room and nickle-and-dimed for every little item (resort fees galore), I have often found quiet little homey places a short drive or walk away from the "event" hotel, with lots of amenities (for free), friendly and real people, and LOTS of space and privacy.

    I treasure the wonderful home-stay memories of my various trips around the world.

    Home stays are lovely, too 🙂

    Happy Trails to You!

  7. As one who has stayed in many hotels all over the world everything you say is true and had me in fits of uncontrollable laughter.

    Another exciting aspect is just working out how all the gadgets work - something as simple as which way to adjust the shower temperature had it's challenges.

    Thanks Randy - you are a genius!!

  8. ugh.

    add in the hotels where you pay for in-room Ethernet AND they teach you where to go to buy the cables yourself (because their last guest stole their last cable) so you can get connected online. in a foreign country. by yourself. after hours of traveling. where you don't speak or read their language. ????????

    or room service that serve cold soup and expiring bread. or carpets that get soaked magically by itself. or sputtering aircons that only sputters at NIGHT. or non-smoking rooms that smell like its smokin' complete with ashtrays. and most of all, international hotel chains that employ front desk people who can't "speaking the english".... i don't get it. o_O

    but it can be funny - AFTER the fact. 😉 like your account - it's hilarious. xoxo - J

    .........

  9. Hey Randy,

    Long time no speak. Love the rant as usual but halfway through occured to me aren't you being a member of the tribe yourself, whinging and whining about how terrible things are?

    Well time to kick back in with your prosperity conciousness and book decent hotels, there are many worldwide. I just spent a month hanging out at the Emirates Palace in Abu Dhabi. Try the Adlon in Berlin, the Savoy in London, Ritz in Paris. All big cities have great hotels, you need to attract some better ones on your 1st class excursions.

    All the best,
    Paul

  10. Hey Randy this was fun 🙂 especially realizing that it is true in most cases. I had recently attended the international game conference in Russia and while reading your post I had the feeling that you are describing my situation. Looks like it won't get better soon.
    Best wishes,
    Sergey.

  11. Hi Randy,
    I guess you and I must have been staying in the same hotels - it's a shame we didn't meet!! Sorry in the delay of this message but it is very difficult to type and carry laptop whilst chasing round the room trying to locate the WiFi signal!!! All the best.

  12. Randy,

    Well at least you will have a ton of stories from your experiences to relate in your speeches. Just think of all the fun you had (NOT) Welcome back to Sunny Florida.

    Becky

  13. Thanks for the laughter. A very funny post!
    And just to think those hotels probably don't think there's a problem 🙂

    Enjoy the rest of your travels

  14. As a frequent traveler and writer I could not agree more with your comments. I hasten to add a few more when crafting hotel policies that also impact the 'hospitality' of the hotel.

    The maid that knocks on your door very early in the morning to make up your room after your late night arrival.

    Room service that forgets to bring the condiments for your meal.

    The lack of hot water or water pressure for the morning shower.

    The excess charges for 'free internet' services.

    The television and remote control that do not have sleep timers, charged batteries, or a way to angle the television so that you can watch TV in bed.

    The concierge floor that is closed on the weekends, or does not open until noon or later.

    The front desk clerk that holds up your dollar bills to the skylight in order to check to see if they are counterfeit.

    The mini bar that has a net worth higher than most of the occupants.

    The doorman that expects a tip for opening the door, the bellman that moves your bags to the bellman that actually takes the bags to the room. Three tips? Come on!

  15. See above. I do book the real upscale ones on vacation but during tours I like to be at the event venue. And truth is, even some of the $1,000 a night hotels have many of these features!

    -RG

  16. Randy, you are so terribly, awfully, and frustratingly right! I've traveled globally and find good hotel design disappointingly rare. I've even been known to press the bell attendant into service moving furniture around the room so that it has a better flow and takes advantage of a view (if it isn't the rooftop chillers.) I likely get some of this from my great grandfather, Frank Lloyd Wright. He was a master at function, though comfort was a bit less of a priority in his furnishings! Every hotel I stay in I take pics and often share on the networks my review of the space, the design, and the stay. The good, the bad and the ugly are now revealed for fellow travelers!

  17. So very true, and where are those signs in elevators or corridors asking guests to be considerate by keeping the noise to a minimum while walking to their room?? and not to have a conference or heated debate with what seems to be two dozen people outside your room at 2.30 in the morning? ...and how about having doors that close quietly instead of BANG???...sometimes CLICK BANG!!... and how about asking the guy who DROPS the daily papers on the floor outside rooms at 6.00am (especially the really heavy ones on Sundays) to get fitter and place them quitly on the floor???...or enforcing smokers to stand in the car park instead of just outside the main doors????....or why does it take an eternity to get food sent to the room?? or that pillow that was overlooked? etc. etc. etc.....AND WE pay through the nose for such good service!!!! Happy days.

  18. OK, seriously this was hysterical! I feel like I live in hotel rooms & these are the very things that I experience. I tried to pick the one that annoys me the most, but.....the list included everything you wrote about!

    Traveling abroad....the converter plug...Don't forget the converter plug....or, forget doing your hair...(i know...you don't have that problem! )☺

    I needed this for my Monday reading enjoyment!
    As always...
    Thanks Randy!

  19. Hysterically funny -- and true! But you forgot to add the lack of clocks in some rooms. 🙂

    And here are a few others than annoy me:

    (1) Disco-flashing smoke sensor lights. (The annoying flashing light on top of the smoke detector.) I carry a roll of black electrical tape with me on every trip to cover it up, otherwise I can't get to sleep. Yeah...I'm probably violating some fire code by doing so.

    (2) Loud, clanking heaters (or air conditioners) that sound like a jet engine preparing for takeoff every time the compressor turns on. These loud noises wake the hotel guest approximately every 20 to 30 minutes. (Isn't that a form of torture??)

    (3) Thermostats that cannot be set for each individual room.

    (4) Hotels where the central air is inoperable after August. (Like there aren't hot days in September or October?!)

    And, you're right about the very high end hotels having these same problems. I've stayed in every type of hotel from the Four Seasons to Marriotts and Westins. It really is as if they all use the same architects and have the same problems.

  20. And don't forget the hotels that try TOO hard, like when you check in at night totally exhausted crashing into bed, and just as you're drifitng into a deep coma the phone rings: "Hi, we just wanted to make sure everything was to your liking," or something like that...

  21. Some more thoughts...

    I really wrote this post about the design of hotels only. But a lot of you already stole my materials for the future posts I was going to write: How to be a hotel interior designer and How to be a hotel general manager!

    Worth noting: Four of the hotels I stayed in this trip were five star hotels and still had a number of these problems. So it's not like I'm staying in cheesy Holiday Inns as some of you seem to think.

    However, just to be fair...

    I'm now at the Four Seasons in Prague. The desk clerk actually escorted me to my room (which they always do here) and this time she actually offered to hang up my coat (which I have never had offered before)! They have exactly none of the design problems I talked about and some employees remembered my name even though I haven't been here since 2007. Room is spectacular, service is stellar, and I'm enjoying life!

    -RG

  22. Yes, you know you've reached ultimate guru status when your followers can read your innermost thoughts, then post your rants directly to your blog.

    Gives new meaning to the term "thought leader..."

  23. You crack me up Randy. Great article...........sad but true in a lot of cases. My son is completely his architecture course. I'll pass this onto him.

    Greg

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  • 41 comments on “Start an Exciting Career as a Hotel Architect!”

    1. Randy,

      I laughed so hard at your comments. But everything you say is true. As an architect, I try to leave very few things to the imagination of my engineering subconsultants. The outlets are a case in point. If I do not layout the outlets with the client before I send the drawings to the electrical engineers for final plans, I am likely to get something just like you described.

      I always layout the furniture in a room before I do the details and then this will determine where to put items such as outlets, A/C units, etc.

      When I was younger I would be much more trusting of engineers, but now I watch them like a hawk. After a couple of items I saw the contractor installing to my amazement and horror as I walked around a construction project, I try never to leave anything to the imagination of my engineers and, God forbid, even less to the general contractor.

      Sometimes though, it's neither a design or engineering error, the problem is something that was generated by too cheap a budget (1/2" drywall, for example). Or maybe this was a remodeled building and the columns were there already and necessary to hold up the building (this is very important). So sometimes, we inherit problems that we did not create.

      But you certainly gave me a good laugh,
      Maria Luisa

    2. Another detail I've noticed in luxury hotels -- upscale glass shower doors that only open door out, so you will bunch up the bath mat as you exit the shower. Or the bathroom lights on an auto on/off switch so when you enter they go on and and then off a few minutes after you exit. If you are reading while soaking in the tub soon you will be in total darkness unless you flail your arms around every few minutes. Very relaxing -- not!

    3. LOL! I take it you didn't stay at any Four Seasons on your trip? 🙂

      While definitely not cheap, it's one of the very few hotel chains that "gets it". Our local Four Seasons Hotel & Resort here in Dallas is to date still my favorite (we like to take long weekends there now and then), but Jennifer and I have always been impressed by their quality of service and the experience, regardless of location.

      Have an awesome day!
      Dan

    4. Hilarious!

      Noticed many of the things you pointed out, along my travels... particularly the head-cooling stations (sites appointed for writings, under an airvent) and recepticle units designed to promote physical activity/stretching of tendons and musculature while also providing electrical current.....

      Thank you for the chuckles,
      Nancy

    5. Being a Hotelier for the last 44 years Randy I know how you feel. It boils down to the owners planning the Hotel before inviting the professionals (like GM''s and Hotel engineers) on board. When we come in the picture, the Hotels are designed by architects who design normally apartments or other buildings but have never designed a Hotel before. I could add another 200 items to your list ,but I have no time to do so, as you will come to my Hotel next year (Malaysia) and I have to design new cupboards,rewire the entire Hotel, relocate air conditioners and increase the number of lifts we have. Nevertheless looking forward to see you again (and so does Poh Li) I am Franz and I am AGEL.

    6. Whew... and you have to pay for all that, too. I actually find the best hotels for business and other trips is the older hotels through Priceline.

      Older generation hotels have windows that open, don't try to be pretentious, and are often twice or more the size of current generation "upscale" rooms, and have nice comfy amenities.

      Also the staff is usually quite friendly and pleasant and agreeable... after all, it takes a lot of stiffening energy to be "pretentious". Plus the corporate management probably makes everybody sit up and be nervous.... just can't relax with those bottom-line counters watching every move.

      And with Priceline pricing, it comes to often a quarter of the price for a cramped, tight-fitting, "prison-like" feeling modern room.

      I have had the best stays in my career through Priceline.

      _____

      Alas, it used to be so with air tickets. I could buy a nice coach ticket on priceline, on a half empty plane, and have 3 full seats to lie out on. Much roomier than the old 1st class. Now, alas, it all seems to be some degree of cattle-car squeeze in. I prefer to fly less... the trip from Houston with the 400 pound woman in the next seat, half burying me, really did me in for wanting to fly very much any more....Well, at least I was warm.... returning to frigid NY after warm Houston. All that body fat covering half my seat did that.

      Aah, the joys of tele-conferencing.....

      Disclosure: I do NOT make any money in any way whatsoever for telling my "Testimonial" of Priceline. I trust this statement is FTC compliant under the latest rules.

      ****

      Another option I treasure is the little Mom & Pop overgrown home-stay type hotels. While our group members might pay $350/nite for a room and nickle-and-dimed for every little item (resort fees galore), I have often found quiet little homey places a short drive or walk away from the "event" hotel, with lots of amenities (for free), friendly and real people, and LOTS of space and privacy.

      I treasure the wonderful home-stay memories of my various trips around the world.

      Home stays are lovely, too 🙂

      Happy Trails to You!

    7. As one who has stayed in many hotels all over the world everything you say is true and had me in fits of uncontrollable laughter.

      Another exciting aspect is just working out how all the gadgets work - something as simple as which way to adjust the shower temperature had it's challenges.

      Thanks Randy - you are a genius!!

    8. ugh.

      add in the hotels where you pay for in-room Ethernet AND they teach you where to go to buy the cables yourself (because their last guest stole their last cable) so you can get connected online. in a foreign country. by yourself. after hours of traveling. where you don't speak or read their language. ????????

      or room service that serve cold soup and expiring bread. or carpets that get soaked magically by itself. or sputtering aircons that only sputters at NIGHT. or non-smoking rooms that smell like its smokin' complete with ashtrays. and most of all, international hotel chains that employ front desk people who can't "speaking the english".... i don't get it. o_O

      but it can be funny - AFTER the fact. 😉 like your account - it's hilarious. xoxo - J

      .........

    9. Hey Randy,

      Long time no speak. Love the rant as usual but halfway through occured to me aren't you being a member of the tribe yourself, whinging and whining about how terrible things are?

      Well time to kick back in with your prosperity conciousness and book decent hotels, there are many worldwide. I just spent a month hanging out at the Emirates Palace in Abu Dhabi. Try the Adlon in Berlin, the Savoy in London, Ritz in Paris. All big cities have great hotels, you need to attract some better ones on your 1st class excursions.

      All the best,
      Paul

    10. Hey Randy this was fun 🙂 especially realizing that it is true in most cases. I had recently attended the international game conference in Russia and while reading your post I had the feeling that you are describing my situation. Looks like it won't get better soon.
      Best wishes,
      Sergey.

    11. Hi Randy,
      I guess you and I must have been staying in the same hotels - it's a shame we didn't meet!! Sorry in the delay of this message but it is very difficult to type and carry laptop whilst chasing round the room trying to locate the WiFi signal!!! All the best.

    12. Randy,

      Well at least you will have a ton of stories from your experiences to relate in your speeches. Just think of all the fun you had (NOT) Welcome back to Sunny Florida.

      Becky

    13. Thanks for the laughter. A very funny post!
      And just to think those hotels probably don't think there's a problem 🙂

      Enjoy the rest of your travels

    14. As a frequent traveler and writer I could not agree more with your comments. I hasten to add a few more when crafting hotel policies that also impact the 'hospitality' of the hotel.

      The maid that knocks on your door very early in the morning to make up your room after your late night arrival.

      Room service that forgets to bring the condiments for your meal.

      The lack of hot water or water pressure for the morning shower.

      The excess charges for 'free internet' services.

      The television and remote control that do not have sleep timers, charged batteries, or a way to angle the television so that you can watch TV in bed.

      The concierge floor that is closed on the weekends, or does not open until noon or later.

      The front desk clerk that holds up your dollar bills to the skylight in order to check to see if they are counterfeit.

      The mini bar that has a net worth higher than most of the occupants.

      The doorman that expects a tip for opening the door, the bellman that moves your bags to the bellman that actually takes the bags to the room. Three tips? Come on!

    15. See above. I do book the real upscale ones on vacation but during tours I like to be at the event venue. And truth is, even some of the $1,000 a night hotels have many of these features!

      -RG

    16. Randy, you are so terribly, awfully, and frustratingly right! I've traveled globally and find good hotel design disappointingly rare. I've even been known to press the bell attendant into service moving furniture around the room so that it has a better flow and takes advantage of a view (if it isn't the rooftop chillers.) I likely get some of this from my great grandfather, Frank Lloyd Wright. He was a master at function, though comfort was a bit less of a priority in his furnishings! Every hotel I stay in I take pics and often share on the networks my review of the space, the design, and the stay. The good, the bad and the ugly are now revealed for fellow travelers!

    17. So very true, and where are those signs in elevators or corridors asking guests to be considerate by keeping the noise to a minimum while walking to their room?? and not to have a conference or heated debate with what seems to be two dozen people outside your room at 2.30 in the morning? ...and how about having doors that close quietly instead of BANG???...sometimes CLICK BANG!!... and how about asking the guy who DROPS the daily papers on the floor outside rooms at 6.00am (especially the really heavy ones on Sundays) to get fitter and place them quitly on the floor???...or enforcing smokers to stand in the car park instead of just outside the main doors????....or why does it take an eternity to get food sent to the room?? or that pillow that was overlooked? etc. etc. etc.....AND WE pay through the nose for such good service!!!! Happy days.

    18. OK, seriously this was hysterical! I feel like I live in hotel rooms & these are the very things that I experience. I tried to pick the one that annoys me the most, but.....the list included everything you wrote about!

      Traveling abroad....the converter plug...Don't forget the converter plug....or, forget doing your hair...(i know...you don't have that problem! )☺

      I needed this for my Monday reading enjoyment!
      As always...
      Thanks Randy!

    19. Hysterically funny -- and true! But you forgot to add the lack of clocks in some rooms. 🙂

      And here are a few others than annoy me:

      (1) Disco-flashing smoke sensor lights. (The annoying flashing light on top of the smoke detector.) I carry a roll of black electrical tape with me on every trip to cover it up, otherwise I can't get to sleep. Yeah...I'm probably violating some fire code by doing so.

      (2) Loud, clanking heaters (or air conditioners) that sound like a jet engine preparing for takeoff every time the compressor turns on. These loud noises wake the hotel guest approximately every 20 to 30 minutes. (Isn't that a form of torture??)

      (3) Thermostats that cannot be set for each individual room.

      (4) Hotels where the central air is inoperable after August. (Like there aren't hot days in September or October?!)

      And, you're right about the very high end hotels having these same problems. I've stayed in every type of hotel from the Four Seasons to Marriotts and Westins. It really is as if they all use the same architects and have the same problems.

    20. And don't forget the hotels that try TOO hard, like when you check in at night totally exhausted crashing into bed, and just as you're drifitng into a deep coma the phone rings: "Hi, we just wanted to make sure everything was to your liking," or something like that...

    21. Some more thoughts...

      I really wrote this post about the design of hotels only. But a lot of you already stole my materials for the future posts I was going to write: How to be a hotel interior designer and How to be a hotel general manager!

      Worth noting: Four of the hotels I stayed in this trip were five star hotels and still had a number of these problems. So it's not like I'm staying in cheesy Holiday Inns as some of you seem to think.

      However, just to be fair...

      I'm now at the Four Seasons in Prague. The desk clerk actually escorted me to my room (which they always do here) and this time she actually offered to hang up my coat (which I have never had offered before)! They have exactly none of the design problems I talked about and some employees remembered my name even though I haven't been here since 2007. Room is spectacular, service is stellar, and I'm enjoying life!

      -RG

    22. Yes, you know you've reached ultimate guru status when your followers can read your innermost thoughts, then post your rants directly to your blog.

      Gives new meaning to the term "thought leader..."

    23. You crack me up Randy. Great article...........sad but true in a lot of cases. My son is completely his architecture course. I'll pass this onto him.

      Greg

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