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Sexual Energy

Posted By: Randy GageSeptember 26, 2011

Let’s talk about one of my favorite subjects:  sex.  Or more importantly, sexual energy…

Before you can achieve greatness, you must be able to lift your thoughts above animal indulgence.  But be wary of the opposite danger, trying to eliminate or repress your natural sexuality.

When you let your sexual thoughts control you, you lose all focus and purpose.  When you kill them off, you deprive yourself of a powerful, natural drive.

As James Allen discusses in As a Man Thinketh and Napoleon Hill goes deeper in Think and Grow Rich!, the real secret is finding the right balance and channeling that sexual energy.

Celebrate the sexual energy you feel, but use it judiciously.  Every time you orgasm, you actually deplete some of the chi (life force) in your body, which will then need to be replenished.  So make it count, or explore other approaches, such as tantric techniques that allow you to orgasm without ejaculation, which preserves your chi.

In Hill’s research he found that most men didn’t reach high levels of success until their 50’s.  He attributed that to it taking them that long to learn how to harness and channel their sexual energy for positive pursuits.

I believe many women have the opposite problem, as there has been so much negative programming about nudity, the body and sex for women, that many get programmed to repress their natural sexual desires.

Neither extreme is healthy.  Finding the balance is what will create the best results for you.  So how do you manage this is your life?  What tips do you have for channeling sexual energy for achievement?

-RG

 

 

46 comments on “Sexual Energy”

  1. hey Randy,

    this is a great post, mostly I think people dodge topics like this, but it's a good thing to bring up.

    For me, I have a really awesome, sexual wife, and focusing on her takes the energy away from negatives that exist out there, and since I've been married to her, I've gone from constant struggle, to making $3,000 - $5,000 a day in profit in my business - it's amazing, but I think actually a majority of the transformation came from the transformation of sexual energy into love. If that makes sense.

    Great post.

    -dave

  2. RG,
    I think this is the magic answer to my success. I have been on both sides of the coin and I am at a point to just get on with the accomplishments and do what I was meant to do.

    I am curious to read other peoples posts about their transmutation...
    Thanks,
    Jim

  3. Accepting that I'm a sexual being and honoring sex as one of the highest expressions of love - that draws my boundaries for me. Regular exercise and meditation is how I channel excessive sexual energy into fuel for me to achieve what I need to every day in other activities. Love this topic. xoxo

    1. Ya Regular exercise and meditation paves the way. Its played from the mind and self control and inner belief boosts to successfully transmute the energy. Orgasm should be the last stage of sexual fulfillment. Ejacuation oozes our Energy. It is basically a matter of practice and mastery can be achieved over a period of time through practice.

  4. I'd like to point out something about Think and Grow Rich -- different editions have had this chapter edited differently. Some have a lot more cut out than others. A while back you made a post on this topic:

    https://www.randygage.com/blog/channeling-your-sexual-energy/

    ... and Kendra posted a link to an online edition that had what I think is a complete version of the chapter. At least more complete than the deluxe hardcover edition I have.

    http://www.virtuescience.com/think-rich-chapter-11.html

    As an editor myself, I wonder who would have had the arrogance to cut paragraphs from Napoleon Hill's work.

  5. Sometimes I'm glad my parents didn't talk to me very much. There was never any negative programming about sex or relationships. We didn't talk about it at all. I have a high testosterone level and am more like a man when it comes to sexual energy and appetite. The more I work out, take good care of myself (raise my self esteem) the stronger it gets.
    In business situations, it radiates as a confidence and strength, a warm, vibrant energy. Men are attracted to it and some women are threatened by it. To diffuse both the sexual attraction and threat, I engage everyone I meet with a welcoming smile and personal attention in conversation. I've learned to keep women disarmed with genuine compliments and make them part of my team.
    women have more power than they know with men and have to learn the fine balance between getting them to do what you want and not leading them into an unsuitable reaction. Practicing is sooo much fun.

    1. I know exactly what you're referring to. Some might refer to that energy as charm and I do believe in using it to my advantage without giving the wrong impression. It does require a certain degree of skill to use successfully.

      1. So true, ladies! In harnessing that sexual energy we must be careful not to let it delute the focus of our male clients from how incredibly talented and wise we are! Finding the balance and loving my life. Best to you...Heather

  6. Dear Sir,
    1. The best topic to deal with and unknown to the masses but must be reckoned with to lead a life towards prosperity.

    2. Swami Vivekananda preserved his energy to transmute his energy to gain wisdom.

    3. Whosoever achieved prosperity, can't be possible without true wisdom, and obviously transmutation is required. But there is no as such technicalities towards this transmutation known to me. In "As a Man Thinketh" and "Think and Grow Rich" this topic was discussed but HOW to ? is not discussed. Everybody whosoever practiced it adopted their own way. And its a ongoing process.

    4. Prefer to know if any Exact theory exist of Transmutation of Sex ........HOW TO ?

  7. Well this is a cute topic! I know that being at either extreme between smurf sex (until you're blue in the face) and social security sex (a little each month but enough to enjoy yourself) or worse, Nun sex (nun in the morning, nun in the afternoon and nun at night) are not healthy places to be long term. Smurf sex just drains the energy to do anything else and abstinence can be an incredible distraction. I have to admit I still haven't mastered the channeling concept. My best technique is not to think or do anything about it and then I naturally need to focus on other things that require mental or physical (non-sexual) energy. I can channel short term, but long term I find it way too tough. Personally I prefer the middle ground for better sleep and a smile on my face.

  8. Hi Randy,

    2 words: Pull Back. A lot.

    To channel sex energy you need to become aware of it. Feel it. See it. Seeing it helps you channel it, instead of acting on it in low energy fashion.

    I meditate through the day. 10 minutes on the hour. I drop everything and surrender. Surrender helps me see what's running down the mental pike. Seeing lets me hold and channel or release these thoughts. Practice surrendering, it becomes so much easier to use our energies as vehicles for your advancement.

    Thanks!

    Ryan

  9. I certainly notice a decline in my sexual urges as I get older. Maybe that is natural and would explain Napolean Hill's theory. Way too many distractions from advertisers, TV, Film, etc... But i still love to date a beautiful gal from time to time.

  10. This a very good one post! Month ago I sent you an e-mail asking you abuot this issue. Thanks! You are very very right. I knew this in Hill's book and it is amazing how things can change! We must tray it. Thanks Randy!

  11. Isn't abundance abundance? Why would we think sexual energy is limited, when everything else is not?

    I don't think there is any limit to the amount of chi we can flow, other than our own ability to handle it. The more you flow, the more you have.

    In my experience, channeling energy productively is much more a question of our ability to focus the current, rather than how much current there is. I know my most creative times are also my most sexual times, because energy is flowing on all fronts.

  12. Here is "The Truth".

    Speaking Personally........................ It took me a long time to finally figure it out. Women Love Sex, even more than men, but they keep that desire hidden from the person they are married to, or in a relationship with. Women love the ATTENTION, and the Feeling of Being DESIRED by as many men as possible. Their sense of "Achievement", comes from how many "Alpha Males", she has seduced, and managed to deceive, manipulate, and control with her sexuality. Women know how to use their sexuality, to get what they want from a man. Some women, have become masters at deception, hidden agendas and ulterior motives.

    Why Women Cheat as Much as Men

    The first clue that your wife may cheat is so odd that most men would never consider it a warning sign: She is seemingly disinterested in sex. Here's the catch: She's not disinterested in sex. She's disinterested in sex with you.

    What a dirty little secret! Whether your lover will cheat can be predicted by the sound of his--or her--voice.

    Most men would never suspect their wife of cheating because she's a "good girl." Most women say they would never cheat because they're "not the type." But once women do cheat, they can't stop--even though they are appalled and shocked by their own behavior.

    That's the word from Michelle Langley, author of "Women's Infidelity: Living in Limbo: What Women Really Mean When They Say 'I'm Not Happy.'"

    Langley says women's relationships and their descent into infidelity follow a very predictable seven-step pattern:

    They push men for commitment.
    They get what they want.
    They lose interest in sex.
    They become attracted to someone else.
    They start cheating.
    They become angry and resentful.
    They begin telling their partners they need time apart.

    Cheating women not only tend to blame their innocent partners for their own infidelity, but also make everyone around them miserable. And then after a long time, they end their marriage.

    Interesting fact: Nearly 75 percent of all divorces are initiated by women. The most common time for a woman to want a divorce is when she is in her late 20s or early 30s and has been married for about four years.

    Langley asserts that women's marriages will continue to follow this pattern until we more accurately understand female sexuality. She has identified distinctive behaviors in cheating women that she has classified into four stages.

    Stage 1: She loses interest in sex.
    Even though a woman seemingly has everything--a husband, a home, a family, a career--she may feel that something vital is missing in her life. She wants to be happier. Over time, she loses interest in sex and actually spends a great deal of energy avoiding physical contact with her husband, including complaining of physical ailments, just to avoid having sexual intercourse with him. She may even feel violated when her husband touches her. She believes that something is terribly wrong with her--that she is somehow defective. She is fearful her disinterest in sex may cause her husband to cheat or even to leave her.

    Stage 2: Her sexual desire is reawakened by another man.
    She encounters another man, and even if the relationship is platonic, her sexual desire is reawakened. She gives these encounters much emotional significance. Because she hasn't felt sexual desire for so long, she experiences tremendous guilt and regret--even if the affair is only emotional and not yet sexual. It's not uncommon for her to have an identity crisis, feeling she has lost a piece of herself. She is no longer a "good girl," but she will try to make it up to her husband by becoming more attentive and appreciative. That soon ends as she blames her husband for her infidelity, insisting to herself that it's his fault her desires and needs are not being met in the marriage.

    Stage 3: The affair begins. She contemplates divorce.
    What may have been platonic or strictly an emotional affair now becomes sexual. She believes the feelings she is experiencing are unlike anything she has ever felt. She is alive again! She thinks she has found her soul mate. She is in love. Actually, she is addicted to the feel-good chemicals that erupt in her body and bathe her brain during the first stages of new love. She is also in tremendous pain, knowing she must choose between her husband and her new lover. She knows what she is doing is wrong and unfair to her husband, but she is unable to end the affair. She may try to end it, she may vow this rendezvous is the last, but she can't stick to this decision. While she may live in a state of limbo for years, she may also decide to separate from her husband. Meanwhile, the clueless husband makes futile attempts to make his wife happy. He is more attentive, spends more time at home and helps more with the housework and child care. But the last thing she wants to do right now is spend time with him. When she tells him she wants to separate, she will say it's to search for herself. While she convinces him the marriage can be saved if she can just have some time alone, she really wants to loosen the restrictions of marriage so she can spend time with her lover. Her husband has no idea there is another man on the scene.

    Stage 4: She either chooses to stay married or she chooses to divorce.
    If she chooses to stay married: She will probably continue the affair, especially if her lover is also married, believing the infidelity can continue indefinitely without disrupting either partner's primary relationship.

    If she chooses to divorce: She will feel relief had having made a decision, but years later will feel guilt and regret for having hurt her husband and children--especially when she begins experiencing the same feelings again for someone new. And the cycle starts all over.

    1. Wow! Obviously this subject hit a nerve. That was quite a rabbit trail. My suggestion is to take all that negative energy you are expending on negative behaviors and put it into a hobby or business that uplifts you. Focus on the positive.

    2. How did Michelle Langly gain access to Liz Taylor's diary? 🙂

      If this is the "truth" we women are doomed! I shall buy a cat and move to the Scottish Higlands. There I will solve murder mysteries, in a quaint town with a gangly red headed police officer....

  13. Randy,

    this is what 'they' said.

    what are YOUR discoveries?

    I expected so much more from this blogpost! 😉

    controlling orgasm in tantra love is like kindergarten when going that school. Getting a Master degree in it is like connecting with a 'soul mate' and initializing the optimal flow of energy is closest "God" you can come (oh, it was so near I miswrote the last word). So 'they' say =)

    The "chakras" (call it what you like but reading the defintion you all know what I mean), all of them, need to be open and in a state of flow before two hearts can be connected and create such intime energy. The first chakra is the "animal sex" - the "biological call" - where already most people drop out of school..

    1. I would disagree. I believe tantric techniques for orgasm without ejaculation are very powerful and not known to most people. I practice this when appropriate.

      I can also tell you when I first began to study kung fu and we began to learn how to break bricks, we we're advised by our Sifu to abstain from all sex for 30 days.

      Having the self-discipline to abstain from sex or orgasm can create a very powerful sexual energy, which can then be channeled in many creative expressions.
      -RG

      1. Randy, I don't know anything about tantric sex. But, I wondered if you would ever share how HIV transformed your experiences? Or maybe it didn't. I just wondered if you felt like sharing?

        I am sure a lot of people would find being HIV positive a hindrance to prosperity in life and relationships. It doesn't seem to have affected you that way. Did it?

      2. I personally avoid orgasm all in all (since avoiding ejaculation while having it is not fool proof to me =) at least 3 - 5 days before Championship competitions for the same reason Sifu told you guys.

        I was not saying orgasm without ejaculation is easy - though in my mind IT IS one of the corner stones to build on.

  14. There is a great book written by Dr. Charles Runels about what men can do to harness sexual energy. The book is called "Anytime, anywhere..." You can request Dr. Charles Runels as a friend, or look his name up on Amazon and order the book...(I am in NOWAY associated with Dr. Runels...although i do have him as a fb friend, and I have read his book and used the techniques...)

  15. Awww, looks like i will end up in the 50`s before i get success, think i need to read think and grow rich again. can not wait that long:):)lol But it is a fact, i seen it so many times how that drive (with out having control) has even the power to ruin people. Great topic

  16. I am so happy you mentioned Tantra!! The cod word in the human potential and success movement is "Passion". The elixir behind passion is sexual energy. Napoleon hill transmutation or sublimation was mental with Tantra you can learn how to transmute physically and mentally during and not during the act of sex!! Wow!!! Sex energy for Greatness and Prosperity will surely give you the extra edge.

  17. Great subject Randy! I think you are right that we should neither suppress or get obsessed with sexual desire. It's a natural part of life. The thing is, a lot of people think that it has to do with attitude. It does to some extent. But even more important is your energy. If you contract your energy you go into suppressing or obsessing about your sexual energy. So instead, Expand your energy! Include sexual energies and people around you without judging them Then they can be a contribution to your life and what you would like to create rather than depleting you.

  18. I've been ruminating over this for some time now, something just doesn't quite gel.

    Energy is a limitless entity, just like prosperity. The higher the energy dependent lifestyle you live, the more energy that is available to you, i.e. a marathon runner utilizes more energy than a couch potato, I wouldn't make it through a softball game and you could do a double header, they have trained themselves up for that.
    Your "chi" is limited only by your usual lifestyle. If your lifestyle requires a "gallon size bucket of chi, then that's all you get, If your life requires a 5 gallon bucket of chi then that is what you get. More effort in any field, more energy drawn to that field from the infinite source, ergo, bigger bucket!

    Successful people succeed at their field because over time with focus and commitment, putting in more and more effort until their bucket grows. It doesn't take from one area to supply another.

    When I perform a task or action that I enjoy doing, it leaves me revitalized, energized and I have more energy for other endeavors.

    I believe you could break a brick without abstinence if you have the focus.

    When you are truly focused, you are in a Beta wave phase, more specifically SMR which is 12-15Hz. This is where your month of abstinence can get you or you can use biofeedback and practice and "be" there at a moments notice. I'll go with option 2.

    I think the 50 year olds are successful because they have trained themselves over the years to get into the correct frame of mind to make the best decision. Many of the super successful also have younger spouse and I assume they don't leave them wanting but I guess I could be wrong.

  19. Hot Topic, everybody has opinion. Me also.

    How far we are open? Even here on the on-line, much less in direct contact. Sometimes people sharing the same bed and don’t talk or silently try to guess something?

    “Anonymous “said some things properly, even though women may not like it. Woman -huntress who gain adrenaline and excitement of this process. If God has given her strong arms, she can be a real killer. Question is- Why? The mostly is need to feed hers ego or to treat fear of rejection, or there may be hundreds of similar psychological reasons. Most often she is just as unhappy as a victim, which likely has similar problems, although he looks like an alpha man.

    How do I know? I'm hunting expert, because I was an excellent huntress. I say - I was. The moment came when I realized that it isn’t working for my good, and never will. This an internal call is crying out for fulfillment rather than by external circumstances and emotional changes. When I realized that I am able to fulfill myself, the attitude towards other people changed dramatically. And hunting ended up on their own.

    I don’t have any opinion about tantric techniques, possible I use something unconsciously. All my energy I collect together and focus it to push myself to achieve my objectives. And it is a passion. As an obsession, who are quite similar to the madness of love.

    We have come in this world to move forward in our development. If two people meet each other whose energy is focused in one direction, and together they complement each other, it only increases the speed of moving forward and we say, they are like two sides of one apple. If power is not focused in one direction, moving forward is difficult and causes frustration. If there isn’t movement forward, begins falling back and a wish to get rid of the other person. I think that sexual energy is just one of expressions of our personal development movement.

    Anonymous said: “ she will never change... cycle starts all over...” My answer: "she" is changed. Almost always.

    But ... I will do one more shot in my life. Only one! With a golden bullet. When? I don’ t know. And if you are afraid of huntress, don’t go on the street! Because there could be someone walking around and charged with a golden bullet. And most likely, she will aim precisely...

  20. Nobody has written more about this than OSHO.

    Try reading " From Sex to Superconsciousness"

    Title explains it all.

    H

  21. I feel and and know that everybody can do it. Sometimes I have to control more, but you have right. Channel the energy to thing you want to achieve. I am doing it intuitively. And then the reward is so sweet :o)
    Everything togehter...

  22. Sexual Energy Transmutation has completely changed my life forever. Before I discovered what sex energy or transmutation even was, I was living a story where I actually thought I had a pretty great job when in reality: 1. I didn't get out very much 2. I was overworked 3. I was underpaid 4. And I didn't have many friends. 
    Now since discovering Sex Energy Transmutation, my entire life has completely become something I've always dreamt of. But, now I see that it's not just magic that makes your desires your reality. It's being able to find balance in your life and transmute certain feelings and energy into power which I now have access to. 
    I initially came across a webinar two guys put together on Sexual Energy Transmutation and it was the best information I've come across via the Internet. They even came out with a free Ebook recently which just dug deeper into the origins of Sex Transmutation which was really cool.
    But the thing I was most interested in was their course which led me to where I am today: and that is fulfilled and happy. I'm living an awesome life. I'm: 1. making more $$$ than I ever have before 2. I started my own Pet-Sitting company 3. I have friends inviting ME to social events 4. I have found the love of my life (we've been together almost a year and are happily living together) 5. I've traveled more than I ever have in my entire life in the past year after having discovered this amazing truth.
    This course has changed my life. I only want others to discover the power of Sex Energy Transmutation because honestly, anyone CAN do it. You just have to have the proper mindset. It isn't always easy, but in the road ahead it will always be worth it. Here's the link to the informational page of the course if anyone is interested: http://sexenergytransmutation.club/sex-power-geniuswebikarenhttp://bit.ly/informationalpage
    At the very least, check out their free Ebook about the 7 steps to transmuting Desire into Power. It's a short like 20 to 30 page read but packed with powerful information: http://sexenergytransmutation.club/sex-power-geniuswebikarenhttp://bit.ly/transmutationebook

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  • 46 comments on “Sexual Energy”

    1. hey Randy,

      this is a great post, mostly I think people dodge topics like this, but it's a good thing to bring up.

      For me, I have a really awesome, sexual wife, and focusing on her takes the energy away from negatives that exist out there, and since I've been married to her, I've gone from constant struggle, to making $3,000 - $5,000 a day in profit in my business - it's amazing, but I think actually a majority of the transformation came from the transformation of sexual energy into love. If that makes sense.

      Great post.

      -dave

    2. RG,
      I think this is the magic answer to my success. I have been on both sides of the coin and I am at a point to just get on with the accomplishments and do what I was meant to do.

      I am curious to read other peoples posts about their transmutation...
      Thanks,
      Jim

    3. Accepting that I'm a sexual being and honoring sex as one of the highest expressions of love - that draws my boundaries for me. Regular exercise and meditation is how I channel excessive sexual energy into fuel for me to achieve what I need to every day in other activities. Love this topic. xoxo

      1. Ya Regular exercise and meditation paves the way. Its played from the mind and self control and inner belief boosts to successfully transmute the energy. Orgasm should be the last stage of sexual fulfillment. Ejacuation oozes our Energy. It is basically a matter of practice and mastery can be achieved over a period of time through practice.

    4. I'd like to point out something about Think and Grow Rich -- different editions have had this chapter edited differently. Some have a lot more cut out than others. A while back you made a post on this topic:

      https://www.randygage.com/blog/channeling-your-sexual-energy/

      ... and Kendra posted a link to an online edition that had what I think is a complete version of the chapter. At least more complete than the deluxe hardcover edition I have.

      http://www.virtuescience.com/think-rich-chapter-11.html

      As an editor myself, I wonder who would have had the arrogance to cut paragraphs from Napoleon Hill's work.

    5. Sometimes I'm glad my parents didn't talk to me very much. There was never any negative programming about sex or relationships. We didn't talk about it at all. I have a high testosterone level and am more like a man when it comes to sexual energy and appetite. The more I work out, take good care of myself (raise my self esteem) the stronger it gets.
      In business situations, it radiates as a confidence and strength, a warm, vibrant energy. Men are attracted to it and some women are threatened by it. To diffuse both the sexual attraction and threat, I engage everyone I meet with a welcoming smile and personal attention in conversation. I've learned to keep women disarmed with genuine compliments and make them part of my team.
      women have more power than they know with men and have to learn the fine balance between getting them to do what you want and not leading them into an unsuitable reaction. Practicing is sooo much fun.

      1. I know exactly what you're referring to. Some might refer to that energy as charm and I do believe in using it to my advantage without giving the wrong impression. It does require a certain degree of skill to use successfully.

        1. So true, ladies! In harnessing that sexual energy we must be careful not to let it delute the focus of our male clients from how incredibly talented and wise we are! Finding the balance and loving my life. Best to you...Heather

    6. Dear Sir,
      1. The best topic to deal with and unknown to the masses but must be reckoned with to lead a life towards prosperity.

      2. Swami Vivekananda preserved his energy to transmute his energy to gain wisdom.

      3. Whosoever achieved prosperity, can't be possible without true wisdom, and obviously transmutation is required. But there is no as such technicalities towards this transmutation known to me. In "As a Man Thinketh" and "Think and Grow Rich" this topic was discussed but HOW to ? is not discussed. Everybody whosoever practiced it adopted their own way. And its a ongoing process.

      4. Prefer to know if any Exact theory exist of Transmutation of Sex ........HOW TO ?

    7. Well this is a cute topic! I know that being at either extreme between smurf sex (until you're blue in the face) and social security sex (a little each month but enough to enjoy yourself) or worse, Nun sex (nun in the morning, nun in the afternoon and nun at night) are not healthy places to be long term. Smurf sex just drains the energy to do anything else and abstinence can be an incredible distraction. I have to admit I still haven't mastered the channeling concept. My best technique is not to think or do anything about it and then I naturally need to focus on other things that require mental or physical (non-sexual) energy. I can channel short term, but long term I find it way too tough. Personally I prefer the middle ground for better sleep and a smile on my face.

    8. Hi Randy,

      2 words: Pull Back. A lot.

      To channel sex energy you need to become aware of it. Feel it. See it. Seeing it helps you channel it, instead of acting on it in low energy fashion.

      I meditate through the day. 10 minutes on the hour. I drop everything and surrender. Surrender helps me see what's running down the mental pike. Seeing lets me hold and channel or release these thoughts. Practice surrendering, it becomes so much easier to use our energies as vehicles for your advancement.

      Thanks!

      Ryan

    9. I certainly notice a decline in my sexual urges as I get older. Maybe that is natural and would explain Napolean Hill's theory. Way too many distractions from advertisers, TV, Film, etc... But i still love to date a beautiful gal from time to time.

    10. This a very good one post! Month ago I sent you an e-mail asking you abuot this issue. Thanks! You are very very right. I knew this in Hill's book and it is amazing how things can change! We must tray it. Thanks Randy!

    11. Isn't abundance abundance? Why would we think sexual energy is limited, when everything else is not?

      I don't think there is any limit to the amount of chi we can flow, other than our own ability to handle it. The more you flow, the more you have.

      In my experience, channeling energy productively is much more a question of our ability to focus the current, rather than how much current there is. I know my most creative times are also my most sexual times, because energy is flowing on all fronts.

    12. Here is "The Truth".

      Speaking Personally........................ It took me a long time to finally figure it out. Women Love Sex, even more than men, but they keep that desire hidden from the person they are married to, or in a relationship with. Women love the ATTENTION, and the Feeling of Being DESIRED by as many men as possible. Their sense of "Achievement", comes from how many "Alpha Males", she has seduced, and managed to deceive, manipulate, and control with her sexuality. Women know how to use their sexuality, to get what they want from a man. Some women, have become masters at deception, hidden agendas and ulterior motives.

      Why Women Cheat as Much as Men

      The first clue that your wife may cheat is so odd that most men would never consider it a warning sign: She is seemingly disinterested in sex. Here's the catch: She's not disinterested in sex. She's disinterested in sex with you.

      What a dirty little secret! Whether your lover will cheat can be predicted by the sound of his--or her--voice.

      Most men would never suspect their wife of cheating because she's a "good girl." Most women say they would never cheat because they're "not the type." But once women do cheat, they can't stop--even though they are appalled and shocked by their own behavior.

      That's the word from Michelle Langley, author of "Women's Infidelity: Living in Limbo: What Women Really Mean When They Say 'I'm Not Happy.'"

      Langley says women's relationships and their descent into infidelity follow a very predictable seven-step pattern:

      They push men for commitment.
      They get what they want.
      They lose interest in sex.
      They become attracted to someone else.
      They start cheating.
      They become angry and resentful.
      They begin telling their partners they need time apart.

      Cheating women not only tend to blame their innocent partners for their own infidelity, but also make everyone around them miserable. And then after a long time, they end their marriage.

      Interesting fact: Nearly 75 percent of all divorces are initiated by women. The most common time for a woman to want a divorce is when she is in her late 20s or early 30s and has been married for about four years.

      Langley asserts that women's marriages will continue to follow this pattern until we more accurately understand female sexuality. She has identified distinctive behaviors in cheating women that she has classified into four stages.

      Stage 1: She loses interest in sex.
      Even though a woman seemingly has everything--a husband, a home, a family, a career--she may feel that something vital is missing in her life. She wants to be happier. Over time, she loses interest in sex and actually spends a great deal of energy avoiding physical contact with her husband, including complaining of physical ailments, just to avoid having sexual intercourse with him. She may even feel violated when her husband touches her. She believes that something is terribly wrong with her--that she is somehow defective. She is fearful her disinterest in sex may cause her husband to cheat or even to leave her.

      Stage 2: Her sexual desire is reawakened by another man.
      She encounters another man, and even if the relationship is platonic, her sexual desire is reawakened. She gives these encounters much emotional significance. Because she hasn't felt sexual desire for so long, she experiences tremendous guilt and regret--even if the affair is only emotional and not yet sexual. It's not uncommon for her to have an identity crisis, feeling she has lost a piece of herself. She is no longer a "good girl," but she will try to make it up to her husband by becoming more attentive and appreciative. That soon ends as she blames her husband for her infidelity, insisting to herself that it's his fault her desires and needs are not being met in the marriage.

      Stage 3: The affair begins. She contemplates divorce.
      What may have been platonic or strictly an emotional affair now becomes sexual. She believes the feelings she is experiencing are unlike anything she has ever felt. She is alive again! She thinks she has found her soul mate. She is in love. Actually, she is addicted to the feel-good chemicals that erupt in her body and bathe her brain during the first stages of new love. She is also in tremendous pain, knowing she must choose between her husband and her new lover. She knows what she is doing is wrong and unfair to her husband, but she is unable to end the affair. She may try to end it, she may vow this rendezvous is the last, but she can't stick to this decision. While she may live in a state of limbo for years, she may also decide to separate from her husband. Meanwhile, the clueless husband makes futile attempts to make his wife happy. He is more attentive, spends more time at home and helps more with the housework and child care. But the last thing she wants to do right now is spend time with him. When she tells him she wants to separate, she will say it's to search for herself. While she convinces him the marriage can be saved if she can just have some time alone, she really wants to loosen the restrictions of marriage so she can spend time with her lover. Her husband has no idea there is another man on the scene.

      Stage 4: She either chooses to stay married or she chooses to divorce.
      If she chooses to stay married: She will probably continue the affair, especially if her lover is also married, believing the infidelity can continue indefinitely without disrupting either partner's primary relationship.

      If she chooses to divorce: She will feel relief had having made a decision, but years later will feel guilt and regret for having hurt her husband and children--especially when she begins experiencing the same feelings again for someone new. And the cycle starts all over.

      1. Wow! Obviously this subject hit a nerve. That was quite a rabbit trail. My suggestion is to take all that negative energy you are expending on negative behaviors and put it into a hobby or business that uplifts you. Focus on the positive.

      2. How did Michelle Langly gain access to Liz Taylor's diary? 🙂

        If this is the "truth" we women are doomed! I shall buy a cat and move to the Scottish Higlands. There I will solve murder mysteries, in a quaint town with a gangly red headed police officer....

    13. Randy,

      this is what 'they' said.

      what are YOUR discoveries?

      I expected so much more from this blogpost! 😉

      controlling orgasm in tantra love is like kindergarten when going that school. Getting a Master degree in it is like connecting with a 'soul mate' and initializing the optimal flow of energy is closest "God" you can come (oh, it was so near I miswrote the last word). So 'they' say =)

      The "chakras" (call it what you like but reading the defintion you all know what I mean), all of them, need to be open and in a state of flow before two hearts can be connected and create such intime energy. The first chakra is the "animal sex" - the "biological call" - where already most people drop out of school..

      1. I would disagree. I believe tantric techniques for orgasm without ejaculation are very powerful and not known to most people. I practice this when appropriate.

        I can also tell you when I first began to study kung fu and we began to learn how to break bricks, we we're advised by our Sifu to abstain from all sex for 30 days.

        Having the self-discipline to abstain from sex or orgasm can create a very powerful sexual energy, which can then be channeled in many creative expressions.
        -RG

        1. Randy, I don't know anything about tantric sex. But, I wondered if you would ever share how HIV transformed your experiences? Or maybe it didn't. I just wondered if you felt like sharing?

          I am sure a lot of people would find being HIV positive a hindrance to prosperity in life and relationships. It doesn't seem to have affected you that way. Did it?

        2. I personally avoid orgasm all in all (since avoiding ejaculation while having it is not fool proof to me =) at least 3 - 5 days before Championship competitions for the same reason Sifu told you guys.

          I was not saying orgasm without ejaculation is easy - though in my mind IT IS one of the corner stones to build on.

    14. There is a great book written by Dr. Charles Runels about what men can do to harness sexual energy. The book is called "Anytime, anywhere..." You can request Dr. Charles Runels as a friend, or look his name up on Amazon and order the book...(I am in NOWAY associated with Dr. Runels...although i do have him as a fb friend, and I have read his book and used the techniques...)

    15. Awww, looks like i will end up in the 50`s before i get success, think i need to read think and grow rich again. can not wait that long:):)lol But it is a fact, i seen it so many times how that drive (with out having control) has even the power to ruin people. Great topic

    16. I am so happy you mentioned Tantra!! The cod word in the human potential and success movement is "Passion". The elixir behind passion is sexual energy. Napoleon hill transmutation or sublimation was mental with Tantra you can learn how to transmute physically and mentally during and not during the act of sex!! Wow!!! Sex energy for Greatness and Prosperity will surely give you the extra edge.

    17. Great subject Randy! I think you are right that we should neither suppress or get obsessed with sexual desire. It's a natural part of life. The thing is, a lot of people think that it has to do with attitude. It does to some extent. But even more important is your energy. If you contract your energy you go into suppressing or obsessing about your sexual energy. So instead, Expand your energy! Include sexual energies and people around you without judging them Then they can be a contribution to your life and what you would like to create rather than depleting you.

    18. I've been ruminating over this for some time now, something just doesn't quite gel.

      Energy is a limitless entity, just like prosperity. The higher the energy dependent lifestyle you live, the more energy that is available to you, i.e. a marathon runner utilizes more energy than a couch potato, I wouldn't make it through a softball game and you could do a double header, they have trained themselves up for that.
      Your "chi" is limited only by your usual lifestyle. If your lifestyle requires a "gallon size bucket of chi, then that's all you get, If your life requires a 5 gallon bucket of chi then that is what you get. More effort in any field, more energy drawn to that field from the infinite source, ergo, bigger bucket!

      Successful people succeed at their field because over time with focus and commitment, putting in more and more effort until their bucket grows. It doesn't take from one area to supply another.

      When I perform a task or action that I enjoy doing, it leaves me revitalized, energized and I have more energy for other endeavors.

      I believe you could break a brick without abstinence if you have the focus.

      When you are truly focused, you are in a Beta wave phase, more specifically SMR which is 12-15Hz. This is where your month of abstinence can get you or you can use biofeedback and practice and "be" there at a moments notice. I'll go with option 2.

      I think the 50 year olds are successful because they have trained themselves over the years to get into the correct frame of mind to make the best decision. Many of the super successful also have younger spouse and I assume they don't leave them wanting but I guess I could be wrong.

    19. Hot Topic, everybody has opinion. Me also.

      How far we are open? Even here on the on-line, much less in direct contact. Sometimes people sharing the same bed and don’t talk or silently try to guess something?

      “Anonymous “said some things properly, even though women may not like it. Woman -huntress who gain adrenaline and excitement of this process. If God has given her strong arms, she can be a real killer. Question is- Why? The mostly is need to feed hers ego or to treat fear of rejection, or there may be hundreds of similar psychological reasons. Most often she is just as unhappy as a victim, which likely has similar problems, although he looks like an alpha man.

      How do I know? I'm hunting expert, because I was an excellent huntress. I say - I was. The moment came when I realized that it isn’t working for my good, and never will. This an internal call is crying out for fulfillment rather than by external circumstances and emotional changes. When I realized that I am able to fulfill myself, the attitude towards other people changed dramatically. And hunting ended up on their own.

      I don’t have any opinion about tantric techniques, possible I use something unconsciously. All my energy I collect together and focus it to push myself to achieve my objectives. And it is a passion. As an obsession, who are quite similar to the madness of love.

      We have come in this world to move forward in our development. If two people meet each other whose energy is focused in one direction, and together they complement each other, it only increases the speed of moving forward and we say, they are like two sides of one apple. If power is not focused in one direction, moving forward is difficult and causes frustration. If there isn’t movement forward, begins falling back and a wish to get rid of the other person. I think that sexual energy is just one of expressions of our personal development movement.

      Anonymous said: “ she will never change... cycle starts all over...” My answer: "she" is changed. Almost always.

      But ... I will do one more shot in my life. Only one! With a golden bullet. When? I don’ t know. And if you are afraid of huntress, don’t go on the street! Because there could be someone walking around and charged with a golden bullet. And most likely, she will aim precisely...

    20. Nobody has written more about this than OSHO.

      Try reading " From Sex to Superconsciousness"

      Title explains it all.

      H

    21. I feel and and know that everybody can do it. Sometimes I have to control more, but you have right. Channel the energy to thing you want to achieve. I am doing it intuitively. And then the reward is so sweet :o)
      Everything togehter...

    22. Sexual Energy Transmutation has completely changed my life forever. Before I discovered what sex energy or transmutation even was, I was living a story where I actually thought I had a pretty great job when in reality: 1. I didn't get out very much 2. I was overworked 3. I was underpaid 4. And I didn't have many friends. 
      Now since discovering Sex Energy Transmutation, my entire life has completely become something I've always dreamt of. But, now I see that it's not just magic that makes your desires your reality. It's being able to find balance in your life and transmute certain feelings and energy into power which I now have access to. 
      I initially came across a webinar two guys put together on Sexual Energy Transmutation and it was the best information I've come across via the Internet. They even came out with a free Ebook recently which just dug deeper into the origins of Sex Transmutation which was really cool.
      But the thing I was most interested in was their course which led me to where I am today: and that is fulfilled and happy. I'm living an awesome life. I'm: 1. making more $$$ than I ever have before 2. I started my own Pet-Sitting company 3. I have friends inviting ME to social events 4. I have found the love of my life (we've been together almost a year and are happily living together) 5. I've traveled more than I ever have in my entire life in the past year after having discovered this amazing truth.
      This course has changed my life. I only want others to discover the power of Sex Energy Transmutation because honestly, anyone CAN do it. You just have to have the proper mindset. It isn't always easy, but in the road ahead it will always be worth it. Here's the link to the informational page of the course if anyone is interested: http://sexenergytransmutation.club/sex-power-geniuswebikarenhttp://bit.ly/informationalpage
      At the very least, check out their free Ebook about the 7 steps to transmuting Desire into Power. It's a short like 20 to 30 page read but packed with powerful information: http://sexenergytransmutation.club/sex-power-geniuswebikarenhttp://bit.ly/transmutationebook

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