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Look Inside…

Posted By: Randy GageJune 19, 2021

It only took 11 negative dysfunctional relationships in a row for me to question whether I might just happen to have some culpability in the results.  It was the same dynamic after numerous business failures and health challenges.  Thus, is the life of a professional victim.  When things aren’t breaking our way, we start checking for possible causes:

Your ex.

The economy.

Your cheap boss.

The president.

Your parents.

The stars.

Your current spouse.

The mainstream media.

If it’s not one of those, we default to the old reliable standbys:

Fate.

Luck.

Destiny. 

After pretty much all of the above, I had to finally ask myself the fateful question that transformed my life.  That question was…

In all of these health emergencies, toxic relationships, and biz setbacks – was there one person who was always at the scene of the crime?   

I didn’t like that answer, but it was what finally set me free.  Because I’m stopped looking outside for answers and started looking inside.  Here’s what I learned…

When you focus on the things happening around you, you’re a tourist in life. 

When you focus on the things happening to you, you’ve chosen victimhood.

When you focus on the things that happen inside you, you’ve chosen to truly create your life. 

Peace,

- RG

Previous post: The Shocking Truth of Imposter Syndrome

4 comments on “Look Inside…”

  1. Two stories if you allow me.. a good friend from Kenya (if ever a guy could say poor me, but doesn't, works his ass off instead) put me up in Napa and I told him your story when your friend called you on your victim stuff, what's the common denominator in all these fuck-ups??
    And Bobby Orr, my hero growing up, saw him on a show when he was promoting his auto.. and the host brought up his ex-agent and Orr said, I didn't even want to mention him, but my publisher said, we can't just ignore this, and Orr said in the interview, shame on me for trusting him so much, shame on him for ripping me off so much.. 3 lessons.. don't be bitter, learn from your mistakes and move on..

    1. David, Bobby Orr was my sports hero growing up, as well, and he remains a personal hero to me to this day. A man of immensely high character on so many levels. Had the opportunity to meet him once in person and he was truly the nicest, most humble person imaginable. And this was reaffirmed by anyone I've ever met who knew and/or met him. And, of course, he used that horrible agent situation to eventually help a lot of people! Which doesn't surprise me a bit.

      1. Yes Bob, he runs a sports agency out of Boston and he warns players even if they don't sign with him, it's your money, don't get ripped off like me, hire an agent, a manager and an accountant and cross reference them..

  2. I like that you repeatedly share the principal life lessons and universal truths Randy, for people that follow your work. I've never been mentored to CONSCIOUSLY and mindfully discern the contrast & practicle application of victorhood vs victimhood before.

    It's become part of my critical thinking process too now. ~ 6 decades on the planet and I'm consciously now realizing how significant this one teaching IS.. it's helped shape the decision making processes & philosophy I live by... wow!

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  • 4 comments on “Look Inside…”

    1. Two stories if you allow me.. a good friend from Kenya (if ever a guy could say poor me, but doesn't, works his ass off instead) put me up in Napa and I told him your story when your friend called you on your victim stuff, what's the common denominator in all these fuck-ups??
      And Bobby Orr, my hero growing up, saw him on a show when he was promoting his auto.. and the host brought up his ex-agent and Orr said, I didn't even want to mention him, but my publisher said, we can't just ignore this, and Orr said in the interview, shame on me for trusting him so much, shame on him for ripping me off so much.. 3 lessons.. don't be bitter, learn from your mistakes and move on..

      1. David, Bobby Orr was my sports hero growing up, as well, and he remains a personal hero to me to this day. A man of immensely high character on so many levels. Had the opportunity to meet him once in person and he was truly the nicest, most humble person imaginable. And this was reaffirmed by anyone I've ever met who knew and/or met him. And, of course, he used that horrible agent situation to eventually help a lot of people! Which doesn't surprise me a bit.

        1. Yes Bob, he runs a sports agency out of Boston and he warns players even if they don't sign with him, it's your money, don't get ripped off like me, hire an agent, a manager and an accountant and cross reference them..

    2. I like that you repeatedly share the principal life lessons and universal truths Randy, for people that follow your work. I've never been mentored to CONSCIOUSLY and mindfully discern the contrast & practicle application of victorhood vs victimhood before.

      It's become part of my critical thinking process too now. ~ 6 decades on the planet and I'm consciously now realizing how significant this one teaching IS.. it's helped shape the decision making processes & philosophy I live by... wow!

    Leave a Reply

    Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

    This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

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