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It Is Not Always Easy

Posted By: Randy GageMay 2, 2010

So on Friday’s post we talked about the choice to see the positive in everything that happens in our life.  And while this is something I really strive to do, it ain’t always easy!

Right after I wrote that, I hopped on a plane to Orange County to conduct a program there.  I had a return reservation home on Saturday afternoon, so I could get back that night and enjoy a relaxing day off Sunday.

Then the organizer in California informed me that my presentation was going to be at noon, instead of 9 am as I planned.  This meant I couldn’t fly out until Sunday morning.

What are you going to do?  I decided to relax Saturday night, get a massage and watch the ballgame.  Then my flight on Sunday would get me home in time to watch Sunday night baseball.

Or that was the plan, until I got to the airport and the gate agent at American informed me my flight was cancelled because the equipment was broken.  They had called my office in Miami, instead of my cell, so I had left the hotel early and they have no lounge at that airport.  They rebooked me on a later connection and only have a window seat instead of my usual aisle.  (Sigh.)  Now I won’t lie…

There’s still a part of me left over from my negative days to want to get exasperated, and berate the agent with snarky comments about the incompetence of AA, venting my frustration.  But that wouldn’t be very nice…

It certainly isn’t her fault.  And what good does that do for her or me?

I’ve learned a long time ago that unless I want to move to Singapore or Dubai, so I can fly Singapore Airlines or Emirates everywhere, I have a choice.  I can pay $20,000 or $30,000 a trip for a private jet, or invest that money in creating more wealth and put up with some inconvenience and mediocrity of the American carriers.

When the itinerary calls for it, sometimes I’ll choice the private jet route.  But since most of my trips are international, that usually doesn’t make sense.

So I pulled my roll-on to a deserted gate with a spectacular view of the runway and had my church service by watching the planes take off and land.  Then when my frame of mind was right, I wrote two chapters of my next book.

I’d like to say nothing fazes me and my attitude is always perfect.  And that every problem instantly produces some unforeseen benefit that outweighs the challenge.

So this is the part where I would tell you on the new flight I ended up sitting next to George Lucas and he asked me to direct and star in the final Star Wars trilogy.  But alas, George probably opted to pay the money for a private jet, and my flights home were pretty uneventful and late.

Not every challenge is fun.  In fact most aren’t.  But as W. Mitchell likes to say, it’s not what happens to you, it’s how you choose to respond to it.

It’s all in the game, yo.

It’s not always easy.  But every challenge we face helps us build character to become the person we want to be.

Ain’t it great!

-RG

29 comments on “It Is Not Always Easy”

  1. Randy,

    I don't travel thought much, but when I do I say to myself that no matter what the only thing that really matters is that I get their safely. I have also said a silent prayer for a good trip and to bless the flight attendants. I have had some wonderful conversations with Flight Attendants.

    No I have to tell you that I am going through this test period of lets see Jim react. That Scotch-English Temper can cause me some sadness. It is with the people I am the closest to that I let my feelings fly.
    I love reading your blog,
    Jim

  2. I'm pretty good at not getting frustrated over circumstances around me, when it comes to waiting or changing something... kind of philosophical about those things.
    However my button is when someone raises their voice at me... well to think of it - that person would be my husband, there really isn't anyone else who has ever done it! That's why I'm so sensitive...
    Anyway he comes from somewhere where it's quite normal, different temperaments, culture etc. So I have this whole cycle of emotions what I go through when it happens, and it aint nice! So this morning it happened again and I felt this wave of emotions coming over me - and then I decided on the spot, to stop that wave. And I did! I imagined that a beautiful finger of something great touched me and took away all my emotions.... and it happened! I was OK the next moment. I just told my hubby that don't raise your voice at me, it scares me. He said no promises...
    That was really inspiring for me, we are the creators of our lives or what! Just what we choose to feel we can!
    It has taken me years to get to this point, practice and all, but hey it's my life and it's me I have to live with, so I cannot see any reason why I shouldn't put the effort in!
    As a side mark, my hubby is a great guy, just so different... and without him, how could I master this fear?
    Have sunny day everyone

  3. I like that! And it IS so true though, that most of the most wonderful things in life happens in chaotic situations-they are like a visible picture of a moment of infinity+where you can pick what you want from the fruitful life garden...that was positive, wasn´t it?...Talking about children...I had a moment once at an airport in London where I had come there on the wrong day!My flight was on the coming day, I had stayed at Birmingham and knew nobody close,my son in my arms was two years old and it was 18 h.Well, after two seconds of complete despair I went to the desk-and in two minutes they had booked a bed and breakfast for us and a car would pick us up.Only one problem...I didn´t have a pound!But I don´t remember if I called my mum to put money in my account or what I did, I remember that the battery in the mobile was almost finnish and that money would be in the account following day.It worked out somehow and we had the most amazing stay in that B&B...not that anything revolutionary happened, but my trust was excellent-and my son didn´t know anything about the chaos inside of me...

  4. I love your last comment about character. When I was a kid my dad always said, "It's good for you. It builds character." and I would relpy, "I have enough character." LOL!

    We are all hear to grow and learn. Thankfully most lessons are mundane and uneventful. I don't think I could take a solid lifetime of huge, tough challenges. Small doses of those are enough!

  5. I think that this is another example of why success is not easy. Showing this kind of restraint and control is another trait of the small percentage of people that don't just follow the herd or go with the flow.
    By not going off on the desk clerk definitely shows that you do not follow along with 99%. It is the few in the 1% that make their own choices and choose the uncomfortable path to their own success and dreams.

    -Walt

  6. I love your today's journal-like post, Randy. I can picture what it would have been like what you went through after this even in Orange County was over, since that was where I lived before I moved to SF. I know it's not always easy to go through what we go through, is it. We're not perfect, and I'm glad that you're not perfect either, but we keep on keeping on, as we experience life here on earth. Yes, I agree.. on "But every challenge we face helps us build character to become the person we want to be," which is similar to "There're no failures..just experiences and your reactions to them..." by Tom Krause. I love your very down-to-earth 'human' honesty. You truly are one of a kind and a good quality human being. lol ...And you truly are one of the best inspirational and motivational speakers in the world, I tell you, Mr. Gage, as I watched you speak in front of the people the other day who needed to hear what you had to say. You're awesome, indeed. Nite nite. It's already 5:00 a.m PST. hugs::: -saach ps I apologize for my 'not yet perfect English, but it's getting better and better everyday with my positive thinking. It's getting shorter, too.

  7. These things happen everyday... and test our resolve to remain calm... you where given lemons and made lemonade... good work my friend...when is your next book coming out?

  8. Funny - I have offered - very generously I might add - to loan my kids to Randy for a month. He can live here and be mom and dad to my kids, while I go gallavant around the world inspiring people, watching flights take off and writing books! Dream life!

    As yet... he hasn't taken me up...

    If he REALLY LOVED me... 🙂

    xox

    BTW - this post REALLY stirred me deeply - tears welled up, and touched me. I have been reknowned for being the most positive person people have ever met... And somehow I've let go of that aspect of myself a little too much... Friends used to play tricks on me and test my positivity and they couldn't catch me out. I'd just beam! I've let lazy thinking, and excuses grow a little too much without weeding enough... THanks for the inspiration Mr Gage! Love ya!

  9. WOW!!! how spoiled can you get?! And so cool about it. You delt with the situation the best you could... Well, good for you but ...
    In fact, that is the normal way to deal with situations we have no control over. Anything else is crazy and exhausting.
    You are such a wonderful DIVO!!!

  10. It's true. Most of the time is not easy to deal with situations we have no control over; but is a learning process and is just great to have around persons like you that keep us keeping on.

  11. Randy,
    We all know travel of any kind can bring out the best and worst in us. Yesterday, I watched an extremely inconsiderate man rush past, and almost run a car off the road as he talked on his cell phone, rather than slow down to let the person in that was trying to merge onto the freeway. I have had it done to me so many times on that same spot that my blood just boiled. As I started to pass the offending man's truck, I soooo wanted to honk and give him the one finger salute but an amazing thing happened. By the time I actually passed him, the urge was gone and replaced with a feeling of peace and the knowledge that hurting him would only hurt me and nothing would be gained. He probably wouldn't even get it.
    I have been praying about my behavior/responses and interactions with others and spending time in your "company", so to speak. It looks like both are paying off. 🙂

  12. Randy,

    It IS GREAT!!!!!

    This is it versus this is not it.

    I can be about control or looking for the miracle in what shows up.

    All of my upsets are a function of my expectations. Isn’t it funny how upsets tend to group themselves with others who have the same upsets?

    Removing or eliminating the upset often happens instantly as soon as I first notice the expectation running the upset. It is amazing to me how many expectations were programmed by me when I was three years old. I can adjust the expectation or if I notice some ‘sacred’ commitment I may come from the underlying commitment in the matter. Often it is best to let it go and let God handle it.

    It is easier to go in the direction the horse is headed and enjoy the ride.

    Many days I operate in a state of frustration. I have some goofy commitment to never be frustrated and I cannot seem to unhook this one. The little mantra I use to get back into the flow is “The way to get what you want is want what you got.” You may notice that the best times and the best things that have ever happened disappear very, very fast. You may also notice that the stuff that bugs you crazy seems to last forever. Turning the events of the day into magical whimsy is an enchanting way to operate and it makes a difference. The day’s end with as much energy as they begin when I notice the triggered expectation AND discover instantly that this is exactly perfect for me right now, that the wonderful adventure I am on is about joy and mystery if I allow it.

  13. I Like this last comment a lot and will read it many times.Seam to immediately realise that my life is a little bit too boring...and I don´t expect more to happen...You have to have flow to go forward! Thank you RG than ME and everybody who is making life more interesting for so many!

  14. Randy, I give you credit for holding it together.

    This is what I do, I look at the person who is causing me pain and I tell them I know it is not their fault, that they are doing their best, and what can they do to solve the problem.

    It does not always lead to a solution I am happy with, but I feel better than if I allowed myself to get angry.

  15. Hello Everybody,

    Good post, Randy, I like the style of it.

    I have a saying. If you're walking down a dark alley and you get beat up, you may as well learn from it. Otherwise, you just got beat up.

    Every experience you have in life is an opportunity to get better. Regretting it doesn't do anybody any good and it goes against the idea of learning. Besides, complaining is a drag. Stand up, brush it off, and move on.

    Next time, either avoid that alley or bring a bigger stick.

    Have a great day, everybody.

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  • 29 comments on “It Is Not Always Easy”

    1. Randy,

      I don't travel thought much, but when I do I say to myself that no matter what the only thing that really matters is that I get their safely. I have also said a silent prayer for a good trip and to bless the flight attendants. I have had some wonderful conversations with Flight Attendants.

      No I have to tell you that I am going through this test period of lets see Jim react. That Scotch-English Temper can cause me some sadness. It is with the people I am the closest to that I let my feelings fly.
      I love reading your blog,
      Jim

    2. I'm pretty good at not getting frustrated over circumstances around me, when it comes to waiting or changing something... kind of philosophical about those things.
      However my button is when someone raises their voice at me... well to think of it - that person would be my husband, there really isn't anyone else who has ever done it! That's why I'm so sensitive...
      Anyway he comes from somewhere where it's quite normal, different temperaments, culture etc. So I have this whole cycle of emotions what I go through when it happens, and it aint nice! So this morning it happened again and I felt this wave of emotions coming over me - and then I decided on the spot, to stop that wave. And I did! I imagined that a beautiful finger of something great touched me and took away all my emotions.... and it happened! I was OK the next moment. I just told my hubby that don't raise your voice at me, it scares me. He said no promises...
      That was really inspiring for me, we are the creators of our lives or what! Just what we choose to feel we can!
      It has taken me years to get to this point, practice and all, but hey it's my life and it's me I have to live with, so I cannot see any reason why I shouldn't put the effort in!
      As a side mark, my hubby is a great guy, just so different... and without him, how could I master this fear?
      Have sunny day everyone

    3. I like that! And it IS so true though, that most of the most wonderful things in life happens in chaotic situations-they are like a visible picture of a moment of infinity+where you can pick what you want from the fruitful life garden...that was positive, wasn´t it?...Talking about children...I had a moment once at an airport in London where I had come there on the wrong day!My flight was on the coming day, I had stayed at Birmingham and knew nobody close,my son in my arms was two years old and it was 18 h.Well, after two seconds of complete despair I went to the desk-and in two minutes they had booked a bed and breakfast for us and a car would pick us up.Only one problem...I didn´t have a pound!But I don´t remember if I called my mum to put money in my account or what I did, I remember that the battery in the mobile was almost finnish and that money would be in the account following day.It worked out somehow and we had the most amazing stay in that B&B...not that anything revolutionary happened, but my trust was excellent-and my son didn´t know anything about the chaos inside of me...

    4. I love your last comment about character. When I was a kid my dad always said, "It's good for you. It builds character." and I would relpy, "I have enough character." LOL!

      We are all hear to grow and learn. Thankfully most lessons are mundane and uneventful. I don't think I could take a solid lifetime of huge, tough challenges. Small doses of those are enough!

    5. I think that this is another example of why success is not easy. Showing this kind of restraint and control is another trait of the small percentage of people that don't just follow the herd or go with the flow.
      By not going off on the desk clerk definitely shows that you do not follow along with 99%. It is the few in the 1% that make their own choices and choose the uncomfortable path to their own success and dreams.

      -Walt

    6. I love your today's journal-like post, Randy. I can picture what it would have been like what you went through after this even in Orange County was over, since that was where I lived before I moved to SF. I know it's not always easy to go through what we go through, is it. We're not perfect, and I'm glad that you're not perfect either, but we keep on keeping on, as we experience life here on earth. Yes, I agree.. on "But every challenge we face helps us build character to become the person we want to be," which is similar to "There're no failures..just experiences and your reactions to them..." by Tom Krause. I love your very down-to-earth 'human' honesty. You truly are one of a kind and a good quality human being. lol ...And you truly are one of the best inspirational and motivational speakers in the world, I tell you, Mr. Gage, as I watched you speak in front of the people the other day who needed to hear what you had to say. You're awesome, indeed. Nite nite. It's already 5:00 a.m PST. hugs::: -saach ps I apologize for my 'not yet perfect English, but it's getting better and better everyday with my positive thinking. It's getting shorter, too.

    7. These things happen everyday... and test our resolve to remain calm... you where given lemons and made lemonade... good work my friend...when is your next book coming out?

    8. Funny - I have offered - very generously I might add - to loan my kids to Randy for a month. He can live here and be mom and dad to my kids, while I go gallavant around the world inspiring people, watching flights take off and writing books! Dream life!

      As yet... he hasn't taken me up...

      If he REALLY LOVED me... 🙂

      xox

      BTW - this post REALLY stirred me deeply - tears welled up, and touched me. I have been reknowned for being the most positive person people have ever met... And somehow I've let go of that aspect of myself a little too much... Friends used to play tricks on me and test my positivity and they couldn't catch me out. I'd just beam! I've let lazy thinking, and excuses grow a little too much without weeding enough... THanks for the inspiration Mr Gage! Love ya!

    9. WOW!!! how spoiled can you get?! And so cool about it. You delt with the situation the best you could... Well, good for you but ...
      In fact, that is the normal way to deal with situations we have no control over. Anything else is crazy and exhausting.
      You are such a wonderful DIVO!!!

    10. It's true. Most of the time is not easy to deal with situations we have no control over; but is a learning process and is just great to have around persons like you that keep us keeping on.

    11. Randy,
      We all know travel of any kind can bring out the best and worst in us. Yesterday, I watched an extremely inconsiderate man rush past, and almost run a car off the road as he talked on his cell phone, rather than slow down to let the person in that was trying to merge onto the freeway. I have had it done to me so many times on that same spot that my blood just boiled. As I started to pass the offending man's truck, I soooo wanted to honk and give him the one finger salute but an amazing thing happened. By the time I actually passed him, the urge was gone and replaced with a feeling of peace and the knowledge that hurting him would only hurt me and nothing would be gained. He probably wouldn't even get it.
      I have been praying about my behavior/responses and interactions with others and spending time in your "company", so to speak. It looks like both are paying off. 🙂

    12. Randy,

      It IS GREAT!!!!!

      This is it versus this is not it.

      I can be about control or looking for the miracle in what shows up.

      All of my upsets are a function of my expectations. Isn’t it funny how upsets tend to group themselves with others who have the same upsets?

      Removing or eliminating the upset often happens instantly as soon as I first notice the expectation running the upset. It is amazing to me how many expectations were programmed by me when I was three years old. I can adjust the expectation or if I notice some ‘sacred’ commitment I may come from the underlying commitment in the matter. Often it is best to let it go and let God handle it.

      It is easier to go in the direction the horse is headed and enjoy the ride.

      Many days I operate in a state of frustration. I have some goofy commitment to never be frustrated and I cannot seem to unhook this one. The little mantra I use to get back into the flow is “The way to get what you want is want what you got.” You may notice that the best times and the best things that have ever happened disappear very, very fast. You may also notice that the stuff that bugs you crazy seems to last forever. Turning the events of the day into magical whimsy is an enchanting way to operate and it makes a difference. The day’s end with as much energy as they begin when I notice the triggered expectation AND discover instantly that this is exactly perfect for me right now, that the wonderful adventure I am on is about joy and mystery if I allow it.

    13. I Like this last comment a lot and will read it many times.Seam to immediately realise that my life is a little bit too boring...and I don´t expect more to happen...You have to have flow to go forward! Thank you RG than ME and everybody who is making life more interesting for so many!

    14. Randy, I give you credit for holding it together.

      This is what I do, I look at the person who is causing me pain and I tell them I know it is not their fault, that they are doing their best, and what can they do to solve the problem.

      It does not always lead to a solution I am happy with, but I feel better than if I allowed myself to get angry.

    15. Hello Everybody,

      Good post, Randy, I like the style of it.

      I have a saying. If you're walking down a dark alley and you get beat up, you may as well learn from it. Otherwise, you just got beat up.

      Every experience you have in life is an opportunity to get better. Regretting it doesn't do anybody any good and it goes against the idea of learning. Besides, complaining is a drag. Stand up, brush it off, and move on.

      Next time, either avoid that alley or bring a bigger stick.

      Have a great day, everybody.

    Leave a Reply

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