The email was from a dear friend. She writes, “Yes… I am the classic pleaser… (Who is also ambitious and wealth-hungry.) I have NO problems giving – I seem to have no problems going after big checks (and getting them), but once I close the deal, I immediately start panicking and worrying that I have nothing to offer.
“So when I do deliver the deal – if the client pays me $40,000, I have to deliver $150,000 worth of work. So that means I end up making no money. But the client is overjoyed, they love me, they make a ton of money, they send me more business and I look like a hero! Albeit a BROKE hero.
“What’s wrong here? It’s not my prosperity consciousness – believe me I have no problems living the lifestyle of the rich and famous. I own my appetite for luxury. I have no problems chasing and closing the big contracts – but then I choke, I panic, I feel like a fraud. I can’t receive. I don’t know when to just SHUT UP and accept.”
Well I’ll tell you what’s wrong here. It most definitely IS her prosperity consciousness. And that’s the rub for most people...
They think because they would like to live in luxury, that must mean they have prosperity consciousness. Unfortunately that’s only true on the conscious level. But at the subconscious level, they still believe they are somehow noble, spiritual, or heroic being poor. And until you resolve that, your subconscious mind always wins.
Work on changing your actions and you create incremental progress. Work on changing your thinking and you change everything!
Trust me when I tell you that the world is filled with lack-programmed people who think they want to be rich. But that will never happen for them until they get rid of the underlying programming that undermines that.
So how you doing on that?
And please keep positive thoughts and vision for our friends in Australia and Egypt. The Aussies have a category five cyclone bearing down on them, and the civil unrest in Egypt seems to be worsening.
Hi Randy! Yes, you are just right. There is a lot of people who is lack-programmed and they think they wanna be rich. To be honest I'm inthe process of changing that. I'm trying to change my actions and my way of thinking, because somehow I know I was lack-programmed too and I don't want it to be like that... If you can tell me some technique or something that I can apply to continue with my process I would appreciate it. Thank you very much, and much love.
I realise that I have been programmed all my life by the "hero" stories we encounter in books, film and TV, but I have found your books really helpful in identifying the lack programming and to replace them with prosperous thoughts.
Thank you for you!
Thank you very much for sharing Randy. I do believe my thoughts are in the right place, and my prosperity consciousness. I am very conscious of the thoughts I think and the things I accept as programming for my subconscious, but I have been brought up in a home where I was taught about programming my subconscious to accept wealth and abundance. I was taught to be "smart, healthy, and rich." I am very thankful for that.
Good post. Very true words. "Work on changing your thinking and you change everything." How?? Goals, visualisation, dreamboard, movie script, analysis? I keep sabotaging my efforts and going backwards, i have for 7 years. I do really well for a while and then stuff everything up. I kinda figured it was because apparently I have a structural void, that I wasnt loved as a kid and always feel unworthy about everything on a subconscious level. i have not been in a relationship for years and just found out that apparently this is because i dont think anybody could truly love me and i look for 'one way' deals to fulfill being loved, which are just temporary. I figure I could overcome this by visualisation. Do I just visualise everything i want and never had. I think it will actually work. It sounds a little sad i guess, when we are talking about the concept of 'being loved' but yeah. ha ha. what are your thoughtss?
shud my plan of action be visualise. I guess im asking is how do i fill that 'void' that ive always had and thats sabotaging me into the future.
hope to hear ur thoughts.
The thing that jumps out at me is the number of negative affirmations you have made in just this short comment. Please don;t affirm things like that, because you program your subconscious mind to make them keep coming true.
Thanks for your insights RG. I will be very consciuous of these negative affirmations.
Randy is right, tell yourself you are loveable. Remember as adults we don't need our parents love or approval anymore. We only need to approve and love ourselves and then most of the love we encounter will become two way. That's my opinion.
It requires thinking and doing. Thinking you are loveable and taking the actions that make you feel loveable. Like making choices that are loving to youself and setting boundries with others to protect your self and your feelings of self worth.
Have empathy for yourself and others. Don't expect you will be perfect all the time, or others for that matter.
In fact, I think that was one of the best things Randy said in his "Dumb Sick and Broke" Book. I don't remember the exact quote sorry, but I think it was something like go easy on yourself. Also, I loved it when he said nobody is better than anyone else. That is true, we are all equal in our humanity.
See Randy, I can be critical of you, and still be a fan. 🙂
Thanks Annie, I will remember this. Thanks for your advice
Anonymous, I just want to say again that you are loveable. Lots of us didn't have the required love growing up. You are not alone. I think our parents didn't get the love they needed either. Not that I am excusing it, just trying to make sense of it.
Tell that awful thought in your head to take a hike. Tell it That you know the real truth, that you are loveable.
Thanks again Annie. Yes, I will do this. Thank you
"Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you.."
We all are born into a broken, imperfect world. But the One who chose you, created you, has a great purpose in mind for you. You are designed to give and receive love, to reach your highest potential which is to become like and one with your Creator. There is and will be, only one you, ever. That's pretty special.
Your Creator/Father loved YOU SO MUCH that He gave His only begotten Son, the co-creator of the universe, to die so that you might live for eternity in the presence of true love. Look not at broken people but toward the source of Love and you will find it. I love you.
How am I doing on that? Better every day. This is where the work is. In your book, D,S &B, you state that you can't be prosperous if you're not happy. I agree. You also say that our true noble purpose is our own happiness. Again, I agree. So I choose to be happy. And everything flows from being happy: wellness, financial success, great relationships, etc. Yes, happiness is a choice. Shakespeare reminds us, "nothing is good or bad, thinking makes it so." So if one wants a prosperity consciousness, begin choosing to be happy regardless of what is happening. My # 1 goal is: I allow myself to feel happy and peaceful all day, with ease. All else flows from this. The tricky part with changing our programming is that we judge our progress by the results we get. Keep in mind that results are a lagging indicator. You may be making great progress in the unseen world but get frustrated that tangiable evidence has not yet appeared. Keep moving forward in faith.
Thanks for the reminder Joe.
A day before i received a gift from my friend in GB. First I was pleases - she remembered of me and sent me a present, we all like recieving presents, right? The second thought was to send her a present, too, since I know her address now (she recently moved) and I want he to feel the same way, too. The third was was...an automatic, almost irresistible desire, longing to share this present with someone else. I immediately pictired faces of other people whom I would share this present with. Now, I know, that there's nothing bad with sharing. But I also know that I could give away my present without even enjoyning a part of it myself! I always did so! I always felt guilty when I received something good and others didn't, even if I totally deserved it with my actions, working hard many hours and months.
Is it a worthiness issue? Yes. It is also about a general lack programming. I wanted to look good, and gave away things I deserved and worked hard for to other people. It felt good to help out to people who were not as "lucky" as I was (however, it was not just a luck. I contributed a lot of time and energy before I got what I had, while those "unlucky" people had been lazy and just used me!). Even when I tried to have a vision of myself being successfull and rich, I always pictured new ways of helping others, not the ways I would enjoy my success and prosperity!
I totally agree with your friend, Randy. I reched many goals but still was lack programmed. I almost lost interest in reaching other goals, becuase subconsciously I presumed that I was not worthy of more prosperity than I already have.
Oh, one more thing. there was a fear, too. A fear to have more than I already have, becuase "others" would become jealous, I didn't want them to feel jeaulous!!! I know the roots of the problem, they started in hight school. Actually , I think I got it from my family on a subconsious level first. But finding roots didn't help, and I kept sabotaging my own success until I started working on the worthiness problem.
Re: the gift - that's more to do with being unable to receive and also remembering to celebrate the gifts we are given. It is wonderful to be a giving type of person, but we cannot know true abundance until we truly embrace the art of receiving.
I was unable to recieve because I didn't feel worthy and had guilt about it. As to the celebration - totally agree. It's an important skill and I'm working on that. Thank you for reminding!
Yesterday you wrote about mind viruses. I happened to watch an old rerun of Walker Texas Ranger yesterday. The episode was centered around a group of white, rich, trust fund young guys beating up poor, homeless people. Talk about a mind virus! I better not be rich because my children will do bad things and go to jail.
It always goes right back to those limiting beliefs! There's no getting around it and as you mentioned in a past article
You can't fool the Universe 🙂
I'm sending light to Egypt before they kill him, looks like it might end up in violence
I am able to earn resources (vitality, wellness, money, time, skills and vision etc) But when it comes to investing these resources; I do not always follow through in a way that creates a profit.
Many of my investments do flow through nicely...but in some of the same areas there seem to be similar letdowns.
So, must need work on this!
I too am not doing well in this department... I am reading the books, watching the video's, made a dream board. Well, honestly I could do More its been 4 months since I read a book, I am here though every day and I look at my dream board at least a few times a week....
WOW I just realized maybe its Faith truly believing
Damn you Subconscious I will not be a VICTIM or SLAVE to your Programming Again
Is it that EASY? Or do I just want it to be hard?
Or is it Hard but that easy to change?
I think the Later I have Ignored and procrastinating thinking how HARD it will be to change and Living a HARD life Bills. Debt, Government chasing me for taxes working 12 15 hrs a day always worrying bad relationships fighting over money... WOW
IF I TRULY BELIEVE and WORK "HARD" at changing my Programing Having FAITH the whole time .... I too can be free???
OK IM going to for the next 30 days Create such a MIND TSUNAMI that it will wash away those programs, and continue to flow for the next 30 days and the next until I get it right.
Along with cleansing and reshaping my body
To be continued....
PS Thoughts of Resolve in Egypt and a weakening cyclone in Australia
I can empathise with her point re worrying about delivering value for money once the client hires you. I think we have all experienced that one at some time. Thanks Randy for reminding us that the thoughts that we aren't good enough, or up to the job, or they might find out we're not that good, will they feel they got value for money etc - all stem from lack programming. Talk about sabotaging success!
Great post Randy.
Good post, Randy!
"And until you resolve that, your subconscious mind always wins." That's so powerful! We can hold all sorts of thoughts of prosperity (consciously), but if our subconscious doesn't agree, it stops us cold.
I agree Randy. The real work needs to be done on changing the way we think and what we we expect from ourselves. I try to expect more from myself than anyone else around me would. And it does take work to counter the programming that we are hit with daily. As another example of that, on today's Yahoo finance page there's an article on why people should root for the Green Bay Packers in the Super Bowl....just to annoy the rich. I actually like Green Bay, and the way their ownership is structured, but again, this article portrays the rich as evil and conniving.
Really good you picked up on that!
I just had a conversation with my husband last night about something similar. We have a client who hired us to liquidate their household belongings so they can move back to California easily and unencumbered.
They have BEAUTIFUL belongings and fairly high end. We will run an Estate sale at the end of the month and we receive 30% of what the sale brings after we pay our help.
A few days ago the wife gave us piles of jewelry to begin evaluating and tagging. In this pile there were many gold pieces. Most of the gold is very much out of style and we know it won't sell for more than the price of the gold, so we offered to get it melted for her.
If she tried to take it on her own, given she found someone honest, she would be offered at most between $7,000-$7,250 for the pile. When we told her it was worth that much it thrilled her. She thought it was completely worthless!!
Because of our experience, connections, business license and further research we are able to work directly with the refiners and think we can get closer to $11,000 for the pile.
So, here is the quandary...
My husband feels awkward taking a full 30% commission from that large a sum. We haven't decided on what % we will take yet, but it raised the question about why not?
What is the difference between taking 30% from the rest of the sale, (which should bring in at least that much again) but feeling awkward taking 30% from the gold? Especially since even after our commission, the client will receive more then she would have gotten on her own.
It raised questions about what value do we think our service and experience is worth. If it's easy for us, or because we are dealing with more precious items are our services worth less? If something is higher end to begin with should we take a smaller commission? And why? Etc.
We haven't answered all of these yet and I am not that worried about what we choose in the end, as long as we decide from a conscious choice about our value added and how we serve our clients, rather then some sub-concious awkward, pleasing place that undermines our abundance in the process.
Suddenly, I am loving this journey!
You didn't ask, but I'm telling you anyway. 30%!
Jeanne, your husband must have reached the limit of his internal income thermostat when he said he felt bad about charging that much. I'm with Randy - go for 30%!
Yep, hitting an Upper Limit Problem as Gay Hendricks describes it in his book 'The Big Leap'.
The client has benefitted from all you are doing for her, therefore a mutually beneficial exchange has taken place, your fee is your payment for the energy you have and expertise you have provided.
Your services cannot be cheaper just because it's easy for you to perform them. It can be easy for you and your husband because you paid with your time, energy and other resources to come to obtain your experience and to get those business connections, etc/ It wouln't be easy for other people to perform that services, I think. Plus, you are saving money and time for your client, right? So your services cannot be estimated based solely on "easyness", you have to see what value you bring to other person.
Thank you, Jeanne, for bringing up this particular issue (in the past, I suffered from it as well, and from the issue that Randy's friend had)! And thank you Carmen, Elly, and Rishkin for providing more "arguments" for me to use against that kind of lack thinking. It is very helpful to be reminded again, and again. I really appreciate, as it was very timely for me!
Randy, good points, I definitely was behaving in my sales career just like your friend. I was exhausted, felt more broken. and broke. I too, love the life of Abundance.
In this last year of my prosperity journey, I have learned that the subconscious mind relates to my desires. This strong storehouse of energy will bring the realization of my desires, whatever it is, but when it is contaminated it can do damage. So, I went to work on my thinking. When it is clear and operating in a healthy manner, the subconscious can be the engine that pushes my aspirations into high gear action mode to receive the desire outcome with gratitude.
This past week, I put my prosperity conscious to work when my daughter's boyfriend of 4 years was trapped in Cairo for days at the airport. I went into action along with others. I called the White House, The State Dept. where I was able to get the terminal location and direct him to the Evacuation List. Finally. he flew out yesterday to Turkey. I mentioned this because it is amazing what we can do when we are call to action, and how the mind works when you can visualize a positive outcome.
I experienced that we as humans are capable of more; almost like having supernatural powers. I learned that when it comes to our prosperity we should pursue it as if our life depends on it.
Randy, I have always believe that FREEDOM is our birthright, but there are times as Martin L.King Jr. voiced "that it must be demanded from the oppressor." My prayers, love, and light goes out to the people of Egypt, Middle East, and Australia.
It becomes a bad habit sometimes when people OVERestimate what others provide and UNDERestimate their own services and vice versa. When your mind is occupied with lack programming, you can't see things as they are, objectively.
You reached to me on this one! I have been wondering about what my block was.. I have a hero complex! I seem to have a way to help boy friends - now ex boy friends - make lots of money doing what they love. I end up not going after my dreams and making my own money, but helping them instead. Then when we break up I have nothing to show for it - but how to make money doing "XYZ." Which is not what I want to do. I put my dreams to the side to help them get rich while I remained broke and alone to raise my son by myself.
I am married now and I notice I am doing it all over in away. I've helped my husband quit his full time job and how hes going back to school. We are hoping, this time next year, he will have a the job that will support the whole family on just his income allowing me to pursue my dreams. Hoping is now enough, I have a urge to start going after my dreams now, and I'm taking small steps in MY direction.
Now I know, I can stop myself from going too far. I am not a fraud or a mooch. And I do deserve to go after my dreams to be happy and rich. I just have fear that people will feel like I don't appreciate my job and I'm just using them. Then they will come to resent me because all I did was a simple "thanks" and doing just what I'm asked to do is not enough to for them anymore. They started to expect me to go above and beyond what they originally wanted me to do because thats who I've become to them, because I try to impress them so much. Thats why my ex's called me mooch and started to resent me even though I still did my job and stopped surpassing what was asked. I know many people who don't work as hard or know as much as I, but yet get ahead of me. Somewhere in my head I believed that if I don't go above and beyond I will never earn their respect, the better pay, the attention, the love that I had the right to experience from moment of conception... But I feel a change is going to happen!
Thank you Randy! This article helped me see where I was. Now that I have noticed that, I can see where I'm going now! Thank you! Thank you!
~ Much Love & Respect~
You'll have to pardon me for waxing philosophical and esoteric for a moment:
Reality is a combination of particles you assemble around yourself to reinforce your current belief systems.
That's a little something I hit myself with a few times a day. It helps me to keep perspective on feeling proud, practicing kindness, prosperity consciousness, and all that other great stuff.
My favorite tool for developing positive belief systems is meditation:
While sitting quietly, ask your Self how you feel about prosperity (for example). Then listen. If you start thinking, bring your attention back to your breath for a minute or two then ask again. Listen.
The words, thoughts, and pictures that move through your mind at that moment are the answer. Inwardly smile at each one, thank them, then kiss them goodbye.
Keep up this practice and you will discover and eliminate all the bulls--t and replace it with whatever positive stuff you are telling yourself consciously through affirmations, dream boards or whatever other self-developing techniques you use.
(As a side note, if you don't have techniques for making your life better, get some)
Your belief systems control your world. Take control of your belief systems and you can be a superhero.
Thanks to everybody for sharing their thoughts.
Randy, as always, thanks for the inspiration.
This is an interesting one. Just a couple of weeks back my parents called me for my assistance in their business. Their employee was having trouble balancing the books for end of year and they knew I'd be able to fix it. So I spoke to the external accountant to get a grasp of the issues and then I rang my parents back to let them know that I'd be prepared to come in one evening or on the weekend and that I wanted to be paid for it. Even though I was only charging my current hourly rate from my job plus 25%, which is less than half of what a professional would charge, they were disgusted. I found the issues in 1.5 hours, so when I think about it now, I was dirt cheap! My Dad even started to hang the guilt trip on me that he lends me his lawnmower etc. I expected all this but still held firm. I said to my Dad that business and personal favours had to be kept separate. I return the personal favours with personal favours and the work in the business needs to be paid for.
They are actually disappointed in me. It's sad really. It was a reminder of the mixed message and negative programming that I've received about money from them. What I discovered is that I was adjusting my value (my hourly rate) based on what they could afford/tolerate. I was allowing myself less prosperity because of someone else's problems.
I've been thinking hypothetically - if I were to charge professional rates in future, would it be worth the shit-storm it would create in my family?
Do you have prosperity consciousness? Instead, stuck in Tulsa, Ok. reading this, I'm asking the question, Do you have prosperity subconsciousness? The reason I say this is that I'm here meeting with a business partner. I take his advice seriously since he's a billionaire with a life history of overcoming adversities greater than anyone I know. He did some self esteem testing on me and I wanted to share a few. Write your own Eulogy. Make a list of your own notable accomplishments, not to be shared, so you can be totally honest with yourself. Write the names 5 people you have the most contact with. Based on attitude, achievement, happiness and success or lack there of, with each having a value of 25% to total 100%. Any that have a score lower than 50% must be eliminated from spending regular time with or must be challenged to change in order to remain. I wish I could share more but I'd be typing forever. Will try to incorporate some more of this in future blogs should it apply. The point of this was to help me understand that the subconscious mind is much stronger than the conscious mind and should be improved, not reprogramed by filling it with positive accomplishments and attributes that untimately out weight the fight or flight experiences we continually recondition by not counter acting them by recognizing our positive attributes regularly.
Great Post Randy
Its like reading a book on wealth creation and then wanting nobody to see what u are reading...?
"There was something wrong there for me" so I sorted it
Thanks for sharing..
What can i change to do what you are saying about prosperity. How to change all the settings when I was a child. I want to be a prosper person but how to change my mind, my subconscious level?
Thank you Randy for sharing your wisdom on this subject. More than a coincidence that I recently read "You Were Born Rich" by Bob Proctor, in it chapter one speaks to the Prosperity Consciousness.
"Money is meant to be used, enjoyed and circulated not squandered.... Prosperity Consciousness knows no lack nor limitation.....See Money as an obedient, diligent servant that you can employ to earn more money and that you can use to provide services far beyond the service taht you could ever physically provide - feel comfortable about money, being around it and talking it."
A great read as like your blog.
Thanks I like that excerp around money mentioned here. Powerful and on the surface appears easy, if we allow to happen.
You know what RG, this is definitely hard work, and I'm up for it. Years of programming are more so obvious as I step into going forward. I work hard consistently everyday and at work, everywhere, every second of my life it seems, to change my think and rid myself of bad habits from over the years. My subconscious mind, Im working hard to develop a strong connection to it. Incremental progress? Yes, it seems that way for me, Ill get there. Its exciting and can be exhausting, yet its full on rewarding! I want to liove a life of absolute luxury. I have my purpose and keep it formost in the front line of my thinking. Backed up with purpose and values. I really enjoyed reading that chapter in your book!
My cousin lives in Townsville, Australia. I made contact with her the night the hurricane was due. At that time she was 4 kilometres inland (not much by my standards, good grief!)But it was specifically around the coast area. But they were all watching from the back porch as the leaves on the ground started to pick up speed. She was in awe of nature and its power. My cousin is an optimist! She's great!
The hurricane came and went.
he contacted the family today, all is pretty crushed and desolate. Boats and houses flung around like toy models. But she said to me, she is alive and well and so to everyone there. She is always as cheerful a she can be and positive. I'm lucky to reflect on how she manages this type of event as opposed to others. She lost much..
Praying for Aussie's and Egypt. Reading "The Millionaire Mindset". Took a hacksaw to the trailor window I've been looking out of and replaced it with a 360 degree view 🙂