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Choosing Your Mentors

Posted By: Randy GageFebruary 16, 2010

On yesterday’s post I mentioned that people that teach prosperity should have money.  I believe this principle is important for all mentors and people you take advice from.

Recently I told you about the wealth building seminar I left because I realized none of the presenters there made more money than I did.  I apply this approach in all areas of my life.

A doctor told me I had a deviated septum and he wanted to operate on me.  Yet his belly came through the door 30 seconds before he did, he had a pack of Marlboro in his lab coat pocket, and he was wheezing like Darth Vader.  I told him I wouldn’t let him operate on me if he was the last doctor on earth.

I hired a personal trainer that wasn’t very wealthy.  But he had bright eyes, clear skin, and a rocked up body with six-pack abs.  I don’t care how much money he has, and I don’t care if my accountant weighs 300 pounds.

What is important is whether the person you’re taking advice from is successful at what they’re teaching.  So how you doing on that?

-RG

44 comments on “Choosing Your Mentors”

  1. That's such a relevant point Randy. I'm actually in the early stages of forming a new business and have been seeking mentors in order to assure I exceed my goals. And reading your strategy made complete sense. Now it's a matter of finding those successful people that inspire, empower and have compassion.. And have some money, too!

    I also agree about what you said about the doctor. Sounds like a real hack to me!

    Have any suggestions for how to go about finding the best mentors?

  2. Interesting observation - I now always notice if the person I am going to for advice or training is in "good shape" according to what their area of expertise is. It is amazing how many practitioners of NLP and EFT and therapy are overweight or suffer from other medical maladies or have major skin problems (usually emotionally based).
    When I see those kinds of thing, I immediately think "Where is the exit, please!"

  3. I agree they need to be successful, but not just at what they are teaching necessarily, but how successful their students are. There are teachers who have the ability to move rocks to talk and others couldn't teach Mozart how to play a piano and both have the degrees to say they are qualified.

    There are different learning styles and teaching styles. If the two are not congruent both parties will struggle to accomplish what someone with far less proof of ability would do easily. There are ‘work out’ partners that move you into action and others you want to avoid. You have to be willing to be responsible for both sides of the relationship in order for it to function at its highest level.

    You have to be you, first, last, always and all ways. There is only ONE Randy Gage, no copies allowed.

  4. I completely and wholeheartedly agree with this ideology. Thank you Randy, this speaks to me volumes of what I need to do in order to give advice to others. I have some work to do first.
    Correction received and appreciated.

    Jim Bond

  5. I'm loving your posts recently and some have made me laugh out loud with appreciation. I rent one of my commercial building to a guy who smokes and is out of shape and his teeth could you some attention. I told him that he needed to rise up to the level and be the example but his investment was into his newest Mercedes 600. He really looks good inside of the car - but his gym membership is a reflection of his philosophy and he can barely pay his rent. I thinking of turning it into a museum. Great advice as usual.

  6. a money coach of mine who - at the time (2001) - made 50 million a year, told me, that i should only accept someone as a mentor who made 10 to 100 times more money than i ... a tough lesson i had to realise, was, that he did'nt have any time for me .. - i could either interpret it as that he left me and was a good businessman but a not so good coach - or - and that was the lesson i decided to interpret out of it - i had to adapt by making myself interesting enough for him to WANT to see me .. it was'nt easy .. good coaches are tough and they dont always give you the answers in the way you expect them to .. they expect you to think .. good post by the way, Randy !! - I love the substance you bring in ..

  7. Very timely post... Thank you. This is something I look at every year, this year has been tougher than years past about who I look to for advice. But while doing that excercise it has helped me define what I want!

    Thanks for making me think

  8. Fantastic point Randy! I am however struggling with asking the right discovery questions or doing the correct research to identify such people. Specifically, I am looking for a business planning mentor and would love to get your feedback on finding one.

    Joe

  9. Instead of looking for a coach who just coaches, you may be better looking to set up a mastermind with successful business people. And be thinking about what you can bring to the Mastermind.

    -RG

  10. "On yesterday’s post I mentioned that people that teach prosperity should have money."

    That is correct for people who define prosperity as money......

  11. Very well written. As I said in the last post, that is exactly what I have looked for in mentors. I can lose money with the best of them, I want to sit at the feet of those that have made their fortunes so that I can learn from their mistakes that turned in to real wealth and not the mistakes of those that are "want-to-be's. "
    That is why I only use the professionals(i.e. accountants, lawyers, realtors, etc.) that I have too because so many are simply anything but professionals. Most are professionals because the piece of paper on the wall says they are. Many that I have dealt with over 20 years couldn't fiind their way out of a grocery bag!

  12. I think Michael hit on this, but I'm not sure I would "ignore" short comings in a mentor...I will use myself as an example. I make good money and am very good at my craft, sales- not Randy money lol - but I am overweight. I believe that from a practical standpoint I could mentor someone, especially in the sales areana. But obviously, success - as we've learned here - is having a solid balance. So. I guess I would avoid a personal trainer who was buff, but couldn't manage a relationship and was dead broke - at the end of the day what would he/she really have to teach me? To spend all my free time at the gym, because my wife and bill collectors don't know the phone number there?

  13. I agree with you Randy. An unhealthy doctor, a fat personal trainer, and a poor financial advisor doesn't instill much confidence. However I have a question for you. What about MLM?

    We all start at the bottom. If you have someone in your organization who is doing all the right activity and identifying themselves as a future leader, but has not been in long enough to make the income they are destined for, why should people choose them as a sponsor.

    If your future star speaks to some people who like the look of the business and those people decide to go and find a sponsor who is already successful at MLM in financial terms, it could create a few problems.

    I'm interested in hearing how you'd deal with that. Use their upline success as credibility perhaps?

    Mark

  14. It's funny the excuses or justifications we make to keep us in our weakness, eh?

    A personal trainer is in the gym not exercising but making sure that others are doing it right. That's their job -they still go home to their wives and pay their bills.

    It takes half an horu - or Jorge Cruise says it takes 8 minutes a day - and he was fat and lost it all.

    It you want to defend your fat, you can find any reason too. 🙂

    There is being wealthy, healthy, sexy, having delicious realtionships that rock and inspire each other and light up the world with love, AND have a gorgeous body.

    Barack Obama does pretty well - his committment to being healthy gets him up at 5am. It's important to him.

    We all live our values and vision, eh?

  15. Randy, although a short post could be one of your most crucial post.

    It is imperative, and I MEAN imperative that you choose a mentor who has the Know how, and the experience to back up what he/she is mentoring about. Otherwise,YOU are throwing away your money, wasting time, and are headed down the wrong path with inaccurate information that does not apply to your desire outcome.

    Do your homework. Your are shopping for an EXPERT and remember you get what you pay for can be an important consideration (consider market value competitiveness & reputation). For example, are you willing to pay more for a strong supportive pair of running shoes or a pair that will last you a month because they really were meant for walking and not running, but your consideration was price. YOU choose?

    WARNING: CHOOSE YOUR MENTOR WISELY.

    Be Prosperous,
    L.E.E.

  16. I don't think anyone, even Randy, would define money as the TOTALITY of prosperity. However, it IS without question a fundamental, vibrant, living, aspect of it. Physical prosperity, mental prosperity, relational prosperity, spiritual prospertity, and yes, financial prosperity... all are essential components of a "prosperous" life. So if my mentor is teaching prosperity ... I want to see evidence of it oozing from every aspect of their living example.

    Cheers!

  17. I'm an indoor cycling instructor on the side. I wouldn't think of teaching that class unless I had years of cycling and competition under my belt.

    I want to be around people who walk their talk. It's not that hard, if you are conscious about your choices.

    Peace,

    Jhanna

  18. Well said Randy, and I couldn't agree more. I think it's true, as we age there hopefully is more wisdom. I watch where I am getting my advice from now a days, if they are not walking their talk....forget it.
    I used to get some of the best financial advice from my friends who were broker than me, in debt and had dead end jobs....no more!!
    Thanks!!
    Jodi

  19. I too would like to see Randy`s response to the question raised by Mark Hibbitts concerning upcoming MLM leaders who are not yet making a lot of money, but want to attract good people into their teams. 🙂

    Osnat

  20. How are we doing on that? It makes perfect sense to me. If you can see the results of their (people you seek advice from) doings in the physical world, then you know they are doing something right - the evidence is there.
    I also learned one thing along the way. If you are seeking knowledge and advice on any particular endeavor, get advice from at least 3 or 4 people (or sources) in that particular field.
    Think prosperous!
    Edward

  21. You can't expect new people in that business (or most businesses) to be earning a lot of money when they first begin. So you look at the other things they bring to the table.

    Are they passionate, excited, coachable? Are they in a sponsorship line that follows a system and has training, marketing materials and other support infrastructure? Are they willing to lock arms and work with you building your team? If so, they could be a great sponsor. And you still look for other mentors that have done the business successfully to guide you.

    -RG

  22. SOOOO love this post! Far too many people get taken by far too many self-proclaimed "experts" who have no real expertise (read: Proof of significant accomplishments) in the areas they are teaching. Fame, skyrocketing book sales, or smooth presentation skills does NOT an expert make. (Unless, of course, they're teaching you how to become famous, or sell a lot of books, or become a speaking whiz.)

    The public is too easily duped. Thanks, Randy, for reminding people to pull back the curtain of the "experts" they look to for advice.

  23. My dancing partner and I recently had to choose a Latin dance instructor. We had the option of going with the garden variety dancing instructor at our local dancing studio for about $65/hr but neither of us were happy with that. We sought out a woman that was once 8th in the world in Latin and guess what? She only charges $75/hr - a bargain if you ask me. She's a very pleasant person and a great teacher too. We've both learned heaps in just a few weeks and we're both very satisfied with our choice.

  24. I agree for the most part. However there are people who are great at "doing" but terrible at teaching. There are also people who are great at teaching but terrible at doing. Look at sports for example. There are a lot of amazing coaches who can't play the game.

    I think what's more important than what they have done personally is as said above what is their track record in helping others in their area of specialty.

  25. Randy,

    Regarding your statement :

    "Recently I told you about the wealth building seminar I left because I realized none of the presenters there made more money than I did. I apply this approach in all areas of my life."

    Here's a challenge for you ! If you tell me not to listen to people who makes less money then I do - then how do you expect newbies in Network Marketing to succeed ? I think all of us have recieved the golden question "And how much money have you made?" before we even got our first bonus check. Right? So someone who's making less money then you can be a mentor.....or how would you explain this issue from your point of view ?

    Michael

  26. It really is amazing that so many doctors and nurses are so out of shape. It makes you wonder how they are going to take care of you when they can't even take care of themselves.

  27. I don't really believe that you CHOOSE a mentor. I believe you recognize yourself in the mentor and that's why you're attracted to learn from that person. The most influential mentors in my life resonated so strongly with me that it was much more than a selection of who looks good on paper. I also think we need multiple mentors - each with an aspect of ourselves that we're yearning to set free.

  28. WOW... been gone a long time.. come back and read this? hehehe... hahaha...

    now normally you know i like to stay positve and give some helpful feed back... but some times dude s**ts gonna hit the fan... today might be that day for you?

    so, in your materialistic shallow world this works for you? just wondering how many technologies, and skill sets, you founded and developed?

    leaving a seminar because you were the richest person in the room... i am sure you can find and a**h**e convention around some where, and you might leave that seminar also, because you'd be the biggest a**h**e in the room? LOL....

    this is by far one of the DUMBEST posts i have seen you write.... and i cannot believe how many people are agreeing with you...

    DUDE!!!!!

    you're qualified to be a coach... bbbeeeecccaaaauuuussseeee? why again? because you make a lot of money? heheehe... that is silly...

    and you have been teaching MLM for so long and become the "GURU" of MLM, then tried to switch venues to prosperity to gain a wider audience... and you aren't even the top income earner in your MLM? maybe your clients should take your advice and seek a better "coach" there is more to coaching than your income...

    when you start judging people by the size of their wallets, their credit scores and their physical appearance... you have more problems then your money can cure....

    being a multimillionaire and stupid.... means you're still stupid, but rich enough to pay everyone around you to tell you how smart you are.

    this is the lamest justification for prejudice i have ever heard.... and so many people agree with you, its damn scary.....

    i am gonna crawl back in my hole and maybe go read eric's blog maybe he will be making more sense???

    you know i love you man, but this blog is wack!!!! sorry to be so blunt about it....

  29. Is prosperity having a large bank account or always having at your fingertips whatever money you can need because of the energy you exude and people with less prosperity consciousness always throwing money at you (Mother Teresa)? My Rabbi travels the world, has a beautiful home, a personal driver, and all the work he has ever done is be a humble leader who doesn't understand why people keep on giving him stuff. But those people feel that his spiritual value is worth their large sums of money. So, his idea of prosperity is praying, studying the bible, meditation-and others who ONLY have the money throw it at him and hope to pick up some of his amazing energy. Is that not prosperity?

    Cheers.

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  • 44 comments on “Choosing Your Mentors”

    1. That's such a relevant point Randy. I'm actually in the early stages of forming a new business and have been seeking mentors in order to assure I exceed my goals. And reading your strategy made complete sense. Now it's a matter of finding those successful people that inspire, empower and have compassion.. And have some money, too!

      I also agree about what you said about the doctor. Sounds like a real hack to me!

      Have any suggestions for how to go about finding the best mentors?

    2. Interesting observation - I now always notice if the person I am going to for advice or training is in "good shape" according to what their area of expertise is. It is amazing how many practitioners of NLP and EFT and therapy are overweight or suffer from other medical maladies or have major skin problems (usually emotionally based).
      When I see those kinds of thing, I immediately think "Where is the exit, please!"

    3. I agree they need to be successful, but not just at what they are teaching necessarily, but how successful their students are. There are teachers who have the ability to move rocks to talk and others couldn't teach Mozart how to play a piano and both have the degrees to say they are qualified.

      There are different learning styles and teaching styles. If the two are not congruent both parties will struggle to accomplish what someone with far less proof of ability would do easily. There are ‘work out’ partners that move you into action and others you want to avoid. You have to be willing to be responsible for both sides of the relationship in order for it to function at its highest level.

      You have to be you, first, last, always and all ways. There is only ONE Randy Gage, no copies allowed.

    4. I completely and wholeheartedly agree with this ideology. Thank you Randy, this speaks to me volumes of what I need to do in order to give advice to others. I have some work to do first.
      Correction received and appreciated.

      Jim Bond

    5. I'm loving your posts recently and some have made me laugh out loud with appreciation. I rent one of my commercial building to a guy who smokes and is out of shape and his teeth could you some attention. I told him that he needed to rise up to the level and be the example but his investment was into his newest Mercedes 600. He really looks good inside of the car - but his gym membership is a reflection of his philosophy and he can barely pay his rent. I thinking of turning it into a museum. Great advice as usual.

    6. a money coach of mine who - at the time (2001) - made 50 million a year, told me, that i should only accept someone as a mentor who made 10 to 100 times more money than i ... a tough lesson i had to realise, was, that he did'nt have any time for me .. - i could either interpret it as that he left me and was a good businessman but a not so good coach - or - and that was the lesson i decided to interpret out of it - i had to adapt by making myself interesting enough for him to WANT to see me .. it was'nt easy .. good coaches are tough and they dont always give you the answers in the way you expect them to .. they expect you to think .. good post by the way, Randy !! - I love the substance you bring in ..

    7. Very timely post... Thank you. This is something I look at every year, this year has been tougher than years past about who I look to for advice. But while doing that excercise it has helped me define what I want!

      Thanks for making me think

    8. Fantastic point Randy! I am however struggling with asking the right discovery questions or doing the correct research to identify such people. Specifically, I am looking for a business planning mentor and would love to get your feedback on finding one.

      Joe

    9. Instead of looking for a coach who just coaches, you may be better looking to set up a mastermind with successful business people. And be thinking about what you can bring to the Mastermind.

      -RG

    10. "On yesterday’s post I mentioned that people that teach prosperity should have money."

      That is correct for people who define prosperity as money......

    11. Very well written. As I said in the last post, that is exactly what I have looked for in mentors. I can lose money with the best of them, I want to sit at the feet of those that have made their fortunes so that I can learn from their mistakes that turned in to real wealth and not the mistakes of those that are "want-to-be's. "
      That is why I only use the professionals(i.e. accountants, lawyers, realtors, etc.) that I have too because so many are simply anything but professionals. Most are professionals because the piece of paper on the wall says they are. Many that I have dealt with over 20 years couldn't fiind their way out of a grocery bag!

    12. I think Michael hit on this, but I'm not sure I would "ignore" short comings in a mentor...I will use myself as an example. I make good money and am very good at my craft, sales- not Randy money lol - but I am overweight. I believe that from a practical standpoint I could mentor someone, especially in the sales areana. But obviously, success - as we've learned here - is having a solid balance. So. I guess I would avoid a personal trainer who was buff, but couldn't manage a relationship and was dead broke - at the end of the day what would he/she really have to teach me? To spend all my free time at the gym, because my wife and bill collectors don't know the phone number there?

    13. I agree with you Randy. An unhealthy doctor, a fat personal trainer, and a poor financial advisor doesn't instill much confidence. However I have a question for you. What about MLM?

      We all start at the bottom. If you have someone in your organization who is doing all the right activity and identifying themselves as a future leader, but has not been in long enough to make the income they are destined for, why should people choose them as a sponsor.

      If your future star speaks to some people who like the look of the business and those people decide to go and find a sponsor who is already successful at MLM in financial terms, it could create a few problems.

      I'm interested in hearing how you'd deal with that. Use their upline success as credibility perhaps?

      Mark

    14. It's funny the excuses or justifications we make to keep us in our weakness, eh?

      A personal trainer is in the gym not exercising but making sure that others are doing it right. That's their job -they still go home to their wives and pay their bills.

      It takes half an horu - or Jorge Cruise says it takes 8 minutes a day - and he was fat and lost it all.

      It you want to defend your fat, you can find any reason too. 🙂

      There is being wealthy, healthy, sexy, having delicious realtionships that rock and inspire each other and light up the world with love, AND have a gorgeous body.

      Barack Obama does pretty well - his committment to being healthy gets him up at 5am. It's important to him.

      We all live our values and vision, eh?

    15. Randy, although a short post could be one of your most crucial post.

      It is imperative, and I MEAN imperative that you choose a mentor who has the Know how, and the experience to back up what he/she is mentoring about. Otherwise,YOU are throwing away your money, wasting time, and are headed down the wrong path with inaccurate information that does not apply to your desire outcome.

      Do your homework. Your are shopping for an EXPERT and remember you get what you pay for can be an important consideration (consider market value competitiveness & reputation). For example, are you willing to pay more for a strong supportive pair of running shoes or a pair that will last you a month because they really were meant for walking and not running, but your consideration was price. YOU choose?

      WARNING: CHOOSE YOUR MENTOR WISELY.

      Be Prosperous,
      L.E.E.

    16. I don't think anyone, even Randy, would define money as the TOTALITY of prosperity. However, it IS without question a fundamental, vibrant, living, aspect of it. Physical prosperity, mental prosperity, relational prosperity, spiritual prospertity, and yes, financial prosperity... all are essential components of a "prosperous" life. So if my mentor is teaching prosperity ... I want to see evidence of it oozing from every aspect of their living example.

      Cheers!

    17. I'm an indoor cycling instructor on the side. I wouldn't think of teaching that class unless I had years of cycling and competition under my belt.

      I want to be around people who walk their talk. It's not that hard, if you are conscious about your choices.

      Peace,

      Jhanna

    18. Well said Randy, and I couldn't agree more. I think it's true, as we age there hopefully is more wisdom. I watch where I am getting my advice from now a days, if they are not walking their talk....forget it.
      I used to get some of the best financial advice from my friends who were broker than me, in debt and had dead end jobs....no more!!
      Thanks!!
      Jodi

    19. I too would like to see Randy`s response to the question raised by Mark Hibbitts concerning upcoming MLM leaders who are not yet making a lot of money, but want to attract good people into their teams. 🙂

      Osnat

    20. How are we doing on that? It makes perfect sense to me. If you can see the results of their (people you seek advice from) doings in the physical world, then you know they are doing something right - the evidence is there.
      I also learned one thing along the way. If you are seeking knowledge and advice on any particular endeavor, get advice from at least 3 or 4 people (or sources) in that particular field.
      Think prosperous!
      Edward

    21. You can't expect new people in that business (or most businesses) to be earning a lot of money when they first begin. So you look at the other things they bring to the table.

      Are they passionate, excited, coachable? Are they in a sponsorship line that follows a system and has training, marketing materials and other support infrastructure? Are they willing to lock arms and work with you building your team? If so, they could be a great sponsor. And you still look for other mentors that have done the business successfully to guide you.

      -RG

    22. SOOOO love this post! Far too many people get taken by far too many self-proclaimed "experts" who have no real expertise (read: Proof of significant accomplishments) in the areas they are teaching. Fame, skyrocketing book sales, or smooth presentation skills does NOT an expert make. (Unless, of course, they're teaching you how to become famous, or sell a lot of books, or become a speaking whiz.)

      The public is too easily duped. Thanks, Randy, for reminding people to pull back the curtain of the "experts" they look to for advice.

    23. My dancing partner and I recently had to choose a Latin dance instructor. We had the option of going with the garden variety dancing instructor at our local dancing studio for about $65/hr but neither of us were happy with that. We sought out a woman that was once 8th in the world in Latin and guess what? She only charges $75/hr - a bargain if you ask me. She's a very pleasant person and a great teacher too. We've both learned heaps in just a few weeks and we're both very satisfied with our choice.

    24. I agree for the most part. However there are people who are great at "doing" but terrible at teaching. There are also people who are great at teaching but terrible at doing. Look at sports for example. There are a lot of amazing coaches who can't play the game.

      I think what's more important than what they have done personally is as said above what is their track record in helping others in their area of specialty.

    25. Randy,

      Regarding your statement :

      "Recently I told you about the wealth building seminar I left because I realized none of the presenters there made more money than I did. I apply this approach in all areas of my life."

      Here's a challenge for you ! If you tell me not to listen to people who makes less money then I do - then how do you expect newbies in Network Marketing to succeed ? I think all of us have recieved the golden question "And how much money have you made?" before we even got our first bonus check. Right? So someone who's making less money then you can be a mentor.....or how would you explain this issue from your point of view ?

      Michael

    26. It really is amazing that so many doctors and nurses are so out of shape. It makes you wonder how they are going to take care of you when they can't even take care of themselves.

    27. I don't really believe that you CHOOSE a mentor. I believe you recognize yourself in the mentor and that's why you're attracted to learn from that person. The most influential mentors in my life resonated so strongly with me that it was much more than a selection of who looks good on paper. I also think we need multiple mentors - each with an aspect of ourselves that we're yearning to set free.

    28. WOW... been gone a long time.. come back and read this? hehehe... hahaha...

      now normally you know i like to stay positve and give some helpful feed back... but some times dude s**ts gonna hit the fan... today might be that day for you?

      so, in your materialistic shallow world this works for you? just wondering how many technologies, and skill sets, you founded and developed?

      leaving a seminar because you were the richest person in the room... i am sure you can find and a**h**e convention around some where, and you might leave that seminar also, because you'd be the biggest a**h**e in the room? LOL....

      this is by far one of the DUMBEST posts i have seen you write.... and i cannot believe how many people are agreeing with you...

      DUDE!!!!!

      you're qualified to be a coach... bbbeeeecccaaaauuuussseeee? why again? because you make a lot of money? heheehe... that is silly...

      and you have been teaching MLM for so long and become the "GURU" of MLM, then tried to switch venues to prosperity to gain a wider audience... and you aren't even the top income earner in your MLM? maybe your clients should take your advice and seek a better "coach" there is more to coaching than your income...

      when you start judging people by the size of their wallets, their credit scores and their physical appearance... you have more problems then your money can cure....

      being a multimillionaire and stupid.... means you're still stupid, but rich enough to pay everyone around you to tell you how smart you are.

      this is the lamest justification for prejudice i have ever heard.... and so many people agree with you, its damn scary.....

      i am gonna crawl back in my hole and maybe go read eric's blog maybe he will be making more sense???

      you know i love you man, but this blog is wack!!!! sorry to be so blunt about it....

    29. Is prosperity having a large bank account or always having at your fingertips whatever money you can need because of the energy you exude and people with less prosperity consciousness always throwing money at you (Mother Teresa)? My Rabbi travels the world, has a beautiful home, a personal driver, and all the work he has ever done is be a humble leader who doesn't understand why people keep on giving him stuff. But those people feel that his spiritual value is worth their large sums of money. So, his idea of prosperity is praying, studying the bible, meditation-and others who ONLY have the money throw it at him and hope to pick up some of his amazing energy. Is that not prosperity?

      Cheers.

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