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Breaking the Cycle

Posted By: Randy GageFebruary 4, 2009

Some great comments on yesterday’s post on the patterns we repeat.  Terre raised the issue of alcoholism, which is one of the most repeated negative patterns.

A book I found very helpful in this area was “The Alcoholism and Addiction Cure” by Chris Prentiss.  He details the first course of treatment I’ve seen that is in alignment with the principles of prosperity. Not to demean 12 Step groups, but I have always felt they have an inherent victim-hood orientation. This book doesn’t.  I would never affirm, “I am an alcoholic,” or “I am an addict,” because I know how powerful programming your subconscious mind is.

Jane felt I was trying to saddle women with guilt if they try to break the ideology of patriarchal consciousness.  Not at all.  Believe me I have no problem with women stepping into their greatness.   And I won’t demonize them because they are strong enough to live without a man and do the traditional thing.  The examples I gave in my original post were hardly doing that.  As with anything like this, I’m okay with it if you have come about it by critical thinking and conscious choice.  But not if you’re just unknowingly repeating a negative pattern.

I think Natalie got to the essence of what we’re looking for, when she said it’s about finding new ways of being, creating different habits, building strong foundations of relating and communicating, honing the vision, and co-creating.

-RG

11 comments on “Breaking the Cycle”

  1. Randy,

    I ABSOLUTELY agree about the the negative - even present tense - affirmations in AA.

    I could MAYBE see making a past-tense affirmation, but absolutely NOT a negative present-tense affirmation.

    I can't believe more people aren't calling them to task on this . . .

    -David

  2. HA! Randy Gage!

    You crack me up - where's the "fleshing out luscious loving into each moment?"

    Why leave that bit out - the most scrumptious bit of all, hmmmm?

    Love
    N

  3. Jesting and pestering aside...

    I know I do kinda thrust this "lovingness" out there - and truly I do think its a huge factor.

    If we are in a creative "state" of loving (fleshing each moment in love = openness, curiosity, delight, connection, tangible sexual joy, presence, conscioussness) then we are being impeccible in the moment to the delicioussness of living, rather than weighted down by our past environment that impinges and damages our chances of living our awesomely orgasmic life we so deserve.

    Generating this state takes conscious effort, focus, grounded delight and intention, It reveals parts of ourselves that are calling to be let go of, and feels like we're on a knifes edge - which can be edgy, crazy, new - because it's pushing us into places we wouldn't venture.... Beyond who we see ourselves as from our past programing.

    WITHOUT this state - there can be no change... I don't think. We have to be willing to be fresh faced, with beginners mind, and allow ourselves to be fully enlivened to make the changes calling...

    We need this container of -"luscious-loving" of Self AND a right course of action to achieve the vision we have (and to let go of the patterns we are aware of).

    I kind of see it like we have to know the door we are closing (be willing to bolt it if need be); have a lightness in our step to go forward; know which door to open; and have the strength and determination to take action and follow through in stepping into greater light and happiness.

    Enough already - back to my studies...

  4. I have always been a firm believer that most of us have the neccessary skill sets or even knowledge, but most simply lack the proper motivation, direction, or in some cases trust to apply the skills they have to a defined purpose. Most have mastered harnessing energy but require inspiration or motivation from another source to focus their energy with purpose. Once they learn that the source of this inspiration and motivation can be internal and not external, they find focusing considerably easier.

    Too often we are programmed to concentrate too much on being reflective and not enough on how to be focused on goals or outcomes. Those that focus on goals and outcomes are never "victims". They become achievers.

  5. The only value in saying "I'm an alcoholic" is in the idea that unless
    a problem is acknowledged and accepted as real, one will not move
    forward to deal with it. Denial is not conducive to recovery.
    We don't try to deal with a problem which we don't see as a problem.

  6. I agree, I Know Many alcoholics who have saved their Life by admitting that they were an alcoholic, admitting it and accepting it allows you to begin to recover & create freedom & THEN ALIGN yourself with The Principle of Prosperity, If you do not accept it and acknowledge it, you will always be in the constant fight with it & never have the space to grow

    Ricky

  7. Nice comments everybody.
    Adding to Jonathan's comment, it is so true we all have the necessary skill sets and knowledge but I do believe a lot of us have the motivation too(we keep busy all day but are we efficient?)
    What I think we lack more than motivation is Persistence and commitment to have things done and that comes from not having Purpose,Vision,Goals that are big and bold enough.
    We aim too low and there is no excitement in achieving something we already know how to achieve...
    Do not remember who used this phrase but is brilliant - "The problem is not that we aim to high and miss but that we aim to low and hit"
    Talking about Persistence look at Edison he failed 10.000 times but he still gave us "light".
    Have a phenomenal day everybody.
    Lorena

  8. Natalie I love your style of expressing yourself. Is there a particular book that has influenced your self growth in that area?

    Anything orgasmic has my vote!

    Have a great and happy day all

    Rachel

  9. I completely agree; however, I believe that the statement "I am an alcoholic" should only be used once during the recovery process and then should be switched to "I 'was' an alcoholic" for the remainder of therapy.

    This acknowledges the problem but limits the effects of this negative affirmation to the past.

    The subconscious mind is a powerful force, and if one is daily parroting "I am an alcoholic", what will happen when they are inevitably presented the opportunity to drink - subconscious mind says "Hey, 'I'm an alcoholic, and alcoholics drink, so make it a double!"

  10. I would also recommend "Seven Weeks to Sobriety" by Joan Mathews Larson. She explains what is physically going on inside the alcoholic's body. Joan lost a son to suicide, after he had repeatedly been "treated" for alcoholism. After his death, she searched for answers, and I believe she found them. This book makes you see alcoholism in a completely new light.

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  • 11 comments on “Breaking the Cycle”

    1. Randy,

      I ABSOLUTELY agree about the the negative - even present tense - affirmations in AA.

      I could MAYBE see making a past-tense affirmation, but absolutely NOT a negative present-tense affirmation.

      I can't believe more people aren't calling them to task on this . . .

      -David

    2. HA! Randy Gage!

      You crack me up - where's the "fleshing out luscious loving into each moment?"

      Why leave that bit out - the most scrumptious bit of all, hmmmm?

      Love
      N

    3. Jesting and pestering aside...

      I know I do kinda thrust this "lovingness" out there - and truly I do think its a huge factor.

      If we are in a creative "state" of loving (fleshing each moment in love = openness, curiosity, delight, connection, tangible sexual joy, presence, conscioussness) then we are being impeccible in the moment to the delicioussness of living, rather than weighted down by our past environment that impinges and damages our chances of living our awesomely orgasmic life we so deserve.

      Generating this state takes conscious effort, focus, grounded delight and intention, It reveals parts of ourselves that are calling to be let go of, and feels like we're on a knifes edge - which can be edgy, crazy, new - because it's pushing us into places we wouldn't venture.... Beyond who we see ourselves as from our past programing.

      WITHOUT this state - there can be no change... I don't think. We have to be willing to be fresh faced, with beginners mind, and allow ourselves to be fully enlivened to make the changes calling...

      We need this container of -"luscious-loving" of Self AND a right course of action to achieve the vision we have (and to let go of the patterns we are aware of).

      I kind of see it like we have to know the door we are closing (be willing to bolt it if need be); have a lightness in our step to go forward; know which door to open; and have the strength and determination to take action and follow through in stepping into greater light and happiness.

      Enough already - back to my studies...

    4. I have always been a firm believer that most of us have the neccessary skill sets or even knowledge, but most simply lack the proper motivation, direction, or in some cases trust to apply the skills they have to a defined purpose. Most have mastered harnessing energy but require inspiration or motivation from another source to focus their energy with purpose. Once they learn that the source of this inspiration and motivation can be internal and not external, they find focusing considerably easier.

      Too often we are programmed to concentrate too much on being reflective and not enough on how to be focused on goals or outcomes. Those that focus on goals and outcomes are never "victims". They become achievers.

    5. The only value in saying "I'm an alcoholic" is in the idea that unless
      a problem is acknowledged and accepted as real, one will not move
      forward to deal with it. Denial is not conducive to recovery.
      We don't try to deal with a problem which we don't see as a problem.

    6. I agree, I Know Many alcoholics who have saved their Life by admitting that they were an alcoholic, admitting it and accepting it allows you to begin to recover & create freedom & THEN ALIGN yourself with The Principle of Prosperity, If you do not accept it and acknowledge it, you will always be in the constant fight with it & never have the space to grow

      Ricky

    7. Nice comments everybody.
      Adding to Jonathan's comment, it is so true we all have the necessary skill sets and knowledge but I do believe a lot of us have the motivation too(we keep busy all day but are we efficient?)
      What I think we lack more than motivation is Persistence and commitment to have things done and that comes from not having Purpose,Vision,Goals that are big and bold enough.
      We aim too low and there is no excitement in achieving something we already know how to achieve...
      Do not remember who used this phrase but is brilliant - "The problem is not that we aim to high and miss but that we aim to low and hit"
      Talking about Persistence look at Edison he failed 10.000 times but he still gave us "light".
      Have a phenomenal day everybody.
      Lorena

    8. Natalie I love your style of expressing yourself. Is there a particular book that has influenced your self growth in that area?

      Anything orgasmic has my vote!

      Have a great and happy day all

      Rachel

    9. I completely agree; however, I believe that the statement "I am an alcoholic" should only be used once during the recovery process and then should be switched to "I 'was' an alcoholic" for the remainder of therapy.

      This acknowledges the problem but limits the effects of this negative affirmation to the past.

      The subconscious mind is a powerful force, and if one is daily parroting "I am an alcoholic", what will happen when they are inevitably presented the opportunity to drink - subconscious mind says "Hey, 'I'm an alcoholic, and alcoholics drink, so make it a double!"

    10. I would also recommend "Seven Weeks to Sobriety" by Joan Mathews Larson. She explains what is physically going on inside the alcoholic's body. Joan lost a son to suicide, after he had repeatedly been "treated" for alcoholism. After his death, she searched for answers, and I believe she found them. This book makes you see alcoholism in a completely new light.

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