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Being Real with Yourself

Posted By: Randy GageJanuary 17, 2009

Yesterday I asked you to do some critical thinking on what you’re attracting in your life.    And look at your health, relationships, prosperity, work, and spiritual foundation.   So how did you do?

Got some interesting comments on the blog.  More than a few of you acknowledged that you perhaps had gotten complacent, thinking that because you’re doing better than the herd, you were doing great.

But that’s a hell of a standard.  Not exactly one of excellence.  Some other questions, to dig a little deeper…

If you’re not experiencing excellent health, do you believe it is the result of factors beyond your control?  (Example: You were paralyzed in a skiing accident.)

If you answered ‘yes,’ is that really the whole truth?  Or have you blamed a weight challenge on your metabolism, big bones, or a sedentary job?  Have you “owned” a health challenge because it gets you sympathy, attention and care?

If you know that your health challenge is a result of factors within your control, why do you think it still exists?  Simply saying, “I need to skip desserts,” etc is not realistic.  There is a lot of truth in the statement, “It’s not what you eat, but what’s eating you.”  How does that apply to you?

Are you using food as an escape or substitute for something else?  Are you subconsciously using it to self-sabotage your results in something?

Likewise with other physical challenges.  Are you holding on to them to excuse yourself from succeeding at something?

Do you have loving relationships in your life?  And by this, I mean real love, not the ‘well we have 2.3 kids, a picket fence and shaggy dog, so we must be in love’ love.  Do you have friends that love you?

Do you have friends and family that you can have REAL conversations with?  In case you’re not sure, here’s what I mean by that.  If you call your mother and she says the following, this is NOT a real conversation:

“Well we met at Aunt Becky’s for the Memorial Day picnic.  I brought apple pie, and Susie made potato salad.  Grandma made ham.  Why she got an 11-pound ham, I’ll never know.  There were only eight of us...”

This is not a real conversation because it doesn’t mean anything.  It’s just mindless conversation to fill space and time.  A real conversation goes something like this:

“I start the new job next month, and I’m really scared.  I hope I can fit in with the new culture.  It’s a real challenge because it’s a big step up for me, and the most responsibility I’ve ever had.  The kids are nervous and a little upset about moving and leaving their friends.  I’m excited about the new opportunity, but I’m afraid the kids won’t adjust well to the change.  I just let them know that I love them and...”

This is a real conversation because we are talking about real emotions, feelings, and things that matter.  Most people are not capable of these kinds of conversations.  They simply repeat the platitudes and patterns the herd taught them, blathering about the weather, sports and what was on TV the night before.

One of the most important scores to look at in your life, is the number of people you’ve attracted who can be real with you.  This means not only having real conversations, but also calling you on your stuff.

We don’t like to hear that our pants are too tight, our breath is bad, or we're repeating a negative relationship pattern, but you need people in your life who will tell you those things if need be.  Having someone that you can check things out is very important to functioning healthy in this very unhealthy society.

So based upon this, how many people do you have that you can have a real conversation with?  Don’t be surprised if it is zero, by the way.  That’s true for most people.  But if it is zero...

Think about that.  What are you running away from?  What is it that you’re still hanging on to that you’re afraid to have someone tell you?  (Addictions, narcissism, fear of intimacy, etc.)

As far as prosperity, how are you doing money wise?  Like the other areas, I think the score here is important.  I believe that the money you earn is in direct relation to the value you provide others.  If you’re not wealthy, why not?

How does that question make you feel?  Are you angry with me for asking it?  Do you think it’s a stupid or bad question?  Have you just started to justify why you are not wealthy?  Examples:  “Not all people are supposed to be wealthy.”  “I’m doing God’s work.”  “I’m in a noble profession like teaching or nursing and we’re not supposed to make a lot of money.”

You don’t really believe that shit do you?  And if you did start to justify like that, what do you think about that?  Does that belief serve you?

How’s your spiritual connection?  Do you have a belief that works for you, whether it’s God, the Universe or nature?  How were you raised, and what kind of programming did that infect you with?

Do you find yourself sometimes attributing things to fate, destiny or God, instead of accepting personal responsibility?

What are the people who are closest to you like?  Are they healthy, happy and successful, or still in victim mode?  Jim Rohn tells us that your income is determined by the average income of your five closest friends.  I think it also holds true regarding relationships, health and other areas.

I hope you’ll really do the critical thinking on these questions.   Because once you uncover subconscious programming, it loses a lot of its power over you.  And it means the further work we do will take you that much father on the path.   And what an exciting path that is!

-RG

17 comments on “Being Real with Yourself”

  1. Randy

    Thank You for Words filled with love, challenge and passion

    God bless you, adn thank you for letting me "remember" that the next step is ACTION.

    With love and admiration

    Santiago ZG )
    COLOMBIA

  2. Mr. Gage,

    thank you so much for this great post! It made me think over my situation once again...

    I'm broke, single (and I never ever dared to be the FIRST to tell a girl that I like her because I thought it'd insult her), and, though I'm enjoying a good health in general, I'm short-sighted. But, unlike most short-sighted people, I NEVER used spectacles or contact lenses because I always realized that the very moment I'd start using them would be the beginning of the end, that is my surrender unto the "circumstances" or "fate" or shit like that. I gradually realized that I myself created my short-sightedness with my fears and failure to accept people and things the way they are (well, there are some other reasons, but I'll skip them to be brief). So I've been working to improve my vision by doing special exercises, facing my fears, and learning to accept things the way they are. I can't say I've won the battle, but I'm so much closer to the victory than those from the herd who still wear their "eye crutches" (this is the way one Russian-speaking healer called spectacles) and keep asking me sarcastically if I already had a perfect vision again.

    I understand that I attracted a partner who simply used me for her own purposes by my attitude towards myself. I used to think of myself as of a shit eater who doesn't deserve to spend more than a hundred bucks a month on his own needs, no matter how much I'd earn. Well, I've been given a good therapy by my "girlfriend" who cured my feeling of worthlessness by insulting me three to four times a week. And though I'm still feeling hurt, I'm really grateful to her for helping me awaken from that nightmare.

    Two days ago, I found Mr. Gage's "101 Keys to Your Prosperity" on my bookshelf and opened it exactly where I needed. Key # 99 said, "When you let go of people who are malevolent to you, negative events will disappear from your life" (don't judge the quotation too strictly because I did a back translation from Russian). That was a token.

    This morning, I decided to let go of my ex-girlfriend because she'd been one of the most malevolent people in my life. I sent her a message on her mobile asking her not to call or write to or meet me anymore and wishing her all the best in life.

    That was a difficult decision for me, and I'm so grateful to you, Mr. Gage, for that insight that helped me overcome the feeling of guilt my ex used to evoke in me to simply manipulate me (most women are very good at that).

    So today is my great success and that's the only reason I dared post such a long message on Mr. Gage's blog.

    The battle continues! 🙂

    P. S. Mr. Gage, thank you so much for your insights on resolving low self-esteem! I firmly decided to do one hour personal development every single morning (which I've been doing for a week) and I'm thinking about seeing a psychotherapist.

    Has it ever occurred to you that "psychotherapist" is a funny word if hyphenated properly?

    PSYCHO-THE-RAPIST 🙂

    Thanks for your attention!!

  3. Randy
    Always admire your fire and in your face attitude, you always have a tendency to put things out there that others would be afraid to relate. If people had more of your ego and tenacity, this would certainly be a more interesting world. Following you over the past few years has been enlightening and we would lose a shining star if we lost your perspective. There are hard rocks like me that believe but still strive to achieve, the answer always lies with the man in the mirror. Still appreciate your thoughtful rebukes and your sharp words to shake us into reality. We must all master the battle from within ourselves before we can ever embark on and capture the power and success many of us are seeking.
    With great respect....
    Randy

  4. Extracted and inspired from Janet Swerdlow:

    The struggle we see in the outer world is a portrayal of our own inner battles. Whether we struggle to take this job or that, live here or there, keep company with him or her, the bottom line is we're still struggling. We struggle with weight, health, finances, and food choices. We struggle to stay warm on a cold day, or cool on a warm day. We struggle to get enough sleep or any sleep at all; to remember our dreams; to interpret them, to stay consciously connected to Self, Oversoul, and God-Mind. Struggle, struggle, struggle.

    Why would we choose to incarnate in a reality of struggle? What is the struggle about? Has there ever been an experiment where such diverse characteristics are present in one genetically created species? What an intriguing time to live—as a genetic creation of multiple species, can you make peace amongst the many different directions you are pulled? Can you make peace amongst your many varied genetic lines that all exist within your one physical structure?

    What an opportunity!

    When we stop the struggle, then the outer world stops the reflection. This explains "let go and let God." Stop the struggle. Now. Rise above the struggle. Refuse to participate. Stop kicking and screaming. Stop creating an outer enemy that only exists within your own mind.

    How do you rate your progress so far? Are you up to the task that you chose? Can you accomplish what you came here to do? Are you willing to release the struggle to create inner peaceful co-existence? Can you "let go and let God?"

    When our mind-pattern only supports financial gain that is what we draw to ourselves. There are always people in society with money. They are the ones manipulating others into thinking that there is no money to be had. This is how they get yours and then you think you cannot get any more. You give the power to their limiting media stories rather than to your Oversoul and God-Mind. Who has the greatest power—the manipulators or your Oversoul and God-Mind? Once you make these determinations for yourself, you will know exactly what to do and how to do it.

  5. All very good questions you pose Randy. Once again, your direct manner is refreshing, though probably alarming to some.

    As to 'my mirror', I can answer yes to some of your questions with complete honesty. When it comes to personal wealth, I cannot. My inner sense tells me that I'm not living my Purpose or Passion, and as we all know, "Do what you love and the money comes". I'm still searching for what I love and purpose.

    I'm stumped on the relationship area though, but I DO have close friends who love me and will call me on my 'stuff'. What I seek is a partner who's willing to do the same and who's emotional damage has healed, if any. Mine has :=)

    Thanks again for all your brilliant insights. They're always helpful.

  6. Hi Randy

    Thanks for the thought provoking questions. I definitely don't score well on health, relationships, prosperity or work. And I've been doing personal development for years. I accept full responsibility for all my stuff, no excuses - good and bad. I recently broke up my Groundhog Day life but I'm attracting more of both the good and the bad stuff again, so I know I still have a way to go. I have few friends that would call me on my stuff, maybe one or two, so your comment that I might be running away from something is food for thought. I've always wondered though, as good as these questions are, how best do I go about finding answers? I can admit to the fact that I might be running away from something, but how do I figure out what it is?

  7. " What are you running away from? What is it that you’re still hanging on to that you’re afraid to have someone tell you? (Addictions, narcissism, fear of intimacy, etc.)"

    I've read every book going (nearly), I'm convinced I understand about lack programming, manifesting etc. and yet every time I get some money an incredible series of 'mishaps' occur and I'm broke again! (Engine blow up on cars, business associate/friend ..cks off with my cash, etc.). This is at least the third time this has happened.

    So I thought, I must be "hanging on to something" but try as I might I was convinced of my "correct thinking". Then last night I was introducing my 17 year old son to your Dumb Sick and Broke Book - he's a very talented racing driver and we lost a sponsor for him so he's very 'frustrated'. I thought he might associate with your love of 'spiritual experinces' with fast driving because this exactly how he feels when he is racing.

    Sorry but that's the background.....
    I continued reading your book and found a paragraph that said "you don't have to give up drinking, smoking, swearng, tv, drugs, nightclubs etc."

    Bingo! I've been trying to give something up for 15 years - Im very close to succeeding now but that paragraph made me realise - it aint no big deal! - it's probably doing me no harm at all now - but deep down there is GUILT! (Probably from my parents).

    And of course the more you focus on trying to "give up" something, the harder it is. I rather think now it'll be a lot easier - "aint no big thing"

    As usual thanks...

    If you're ever in London or Dubai and want treating like you deserve, I have some influence at those Jumeirahs!
    God Bless

    Chris (UK)

  8. To be true to myself.... let's say that I have come a long way, and I still need to cruise a few miles. What I have a lot of problem with, and I hope a few of you out there might be able to help me is this. All my life I have been told to do this, to do that because this is what we are suppose to do. (There are a lot of other people that are also programmed that we need to deal with). This is what I am having problem with, the others that are still programmed, mostly my family, even my spouse. I really enjoy what I am doing, I thank the Universe every day for every thing that comes about in my life. I love the people I work with, etc...
    In 2002, we adopted a 3 1/2 years old girl, who is challenged with "Fetal Alcoholic Syndrome". Now talk about follow the leader. She will mimic everything and everyone around her. One thing that I promised myself is that I would not impose any of the programmation that I was exposed too.
    I am a very spiritual person. I have discovered this in the past 3 years, and I have flourished since that time. BUT, before knowing really what was spirituality, I thought that going to the church was how you get spiritual, which has nothing to do with spirituality. Spirituality is what is within you, not within what happens in a Church. Mind you that you can be spiritual in a Church.
    The child had started to go to Church (because of our Catholic beliefs and all the ceremonies coming to her), and I respected what she wanted. The only problem with all that is that when asked about Church and Mass, she would answer that she was doing it for her grandma (because she was going to make grandma happy). And asking her what are you getting out of all this? she would answer "I dont know". A year or so passed, and one Sunday morning, the child's bio mom called and asked if she could see her, so I asked the child if she wanted to go with her mom a little earlier this Sunday or go to the Church and of course the child chose the mom.
    Well..... that is when the shit hit the fan. We were called abomination of hell because we lead the child away from Church. The grandma made a big scene and now the child doesn' t even want to hear about going to Church. (since she was only going to Church for grandma and grandma act up, she is not interested any more).
    This is my biggest problem. The programmation. What is ok, what is not. How to express myself with people close to me and not being left aside because of their own beliefs.
    I lived my first 50 years with others pushing my buttons. I am going to live my other 50 years for me, and I don't feel selfish because I done enough for others and now I have decided that I am living a different life, that's all. I love life, I am happy, I love what I am doing, I have very good friends that share the same beliefs, I am healthy, I am spiritual, and I am getting there with the wealth, so I am on a good path, just need help with the others in my life that do not have the same beliefs as me. You see, I live in a very small community where every one has their noses in everybody else. I know I need to move on, that is what I will do in 3 years, but I need some kind of action plan for the time being.
    So, I would appreciate some comments....
    Carole

  9. Hi, this is an insteresting subjet, I can tell you that I have my husband and a friend to have those real conversations you are talking about, I just met my friend at work about a year ago, she was the one who lend me your book "Why your´re dumb, sick and broke", after that I started to open my eyes and mind, and I am trying to read must of the books you recommended. We try to have open conversations about everything, and it is working.

    To find somebody to talk to without being judge is hard, and people, a lot of them they dont want to hear the truth.

    Most of the time I ended up being hurt by their comments, like: "you havent have a lot of boyfriends, so what do you know"(I got married 8 years ago). "You are envy, that is the only reason you are telling me this". "You havent been in this situation, so why are you giving me advice".

    So I stoped trying to have real conversation with people, they dont want to hear what you have to say. Now I just listen and from time to time I will say, " I understand what you are saying" and they are happy with that, and after, they will tell me that I am a good friend.

    I started to read self development books since I was 20 years old, stopped for 15 years and restarted a year ago, but I guess it wasnt my time to have a personal grow. Now I am ready.
    I think that people have their own time to do things, this is my time.

    I am an inmigrant who live in Montreal, I went to university in Dominican Rep and when I came here I had a lot of problems trying to work as a dentist, now I know I didint make the effort . I blamed the system, I blamed the govermment, I blamed everybody else but me.

    Now I am taking control of my life, or trying to, right now I am happy with what I have, but looking forward to having prosperity. I have a husband who open his own companie 3 years ago, have two kids that are wonderful, and I have a lot of goals to achive, It is hard but I always try to keep in mind what Jim Rohn said " My suggestion would be to walk away from the 90% who don´t and join the 10% who do."

    Thanks again Randy, have a nice weekend.

  10. I've been thinking about this for a few days- "What am I attracting", and how it relates to my ideal life.

    It sounds like there's some perfect life out there if you just attract the right things, but that would be naive.

    For people who are reading your blog, you'll NEVER get someone who is totally happy with the money they're attracting- the people who follow you always want more- like I've heard you say too.
    As far as relationships, they can ALWAYS get better. Same with everything else, right?

    I'm reminded of that prayer: "I love what I have, I just want more".
    It seems like that would be the ideal situation- loving what you have, but continuing to want more.

    We may judge that nice guy's life, but if he likes it- who are we to judge? We all get our feelings of worth from somewhere, and whereas it's great to get it all from yourself, I don't think anyone is that enlightened.

    So, all of that is to say that I am definitely attracting some of the things I want, but I am probably too focused on the things I don;t want- let's face it- because THAT's what I'm trying to change!

  11. Randy,

    Wonderful post (as always)!

    One quick off-topic (then again, maybe not 🙂 ) question:

    I am reading "The Science of Mind" and remember you mentioning the CDs that you play when you're asleep.

    I need to get these, and have done a few searches on the Blog and the emails and am obviously not entering a successful search querie.

    Would you please post a link where I can purchase these CDs (and a recommendation of which CDs are congruent with your philosophy).

    Thanks again!

    -David

  12. Thanks for your latest blog Randy, you always get everyone thinking outside of the herd mentality. Myself included!

    Ok so, you got me really thinking about all aspects of my life. I do have one friend who calls me on my stuff and I can do likewise with her. It's really sad to realize that all family conversations run the gamut of the weather and other trivial matters instead the important stuff. My sister and I are a little better at this but there is still alot of progress to be made.

    I think my spirituality is growing but coming from the strict background that I came from (raised as one of Jehovah's Witnesses) I find I am having a hard time letting go of certain doctrines. In particular, God's people are not supposed to be wealthy. We come again to those scriptures in the bible that state" it's easier for a camel to get through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the Kingdom of God."

    You mentioned to me before that the bible is an amazing book on prosperity. Would you care to expound on that? I'm sorry but I have just never viewed the bible in that way. What am I missing?

    As far as my health , I am working on it. I excersise every morning before getting ready for work. I am also eating better. I just keep reminding myself that it is ok to do something good for myself without regard for others.

    No one is going to do any of this personal development for me but me. My progress has been slow but in some aspects steady. Relationships and money seem to continue to be the stalemates for me. I am working on them though.

    When you were really working on your stuff back when, what did you do to get past areas where you get stuck? I would really like to read you insights from your experience on this as well as your thoughts on the prosperity angle of the Bible.

    Thanks for all you do. I hope you are having fun in Thailand.
    Talk to you soon,

    Lucinda

  13. Hi Randy, changing the subjet, I wanted to ask you something, I am listening to the audio "How to earn at least 100,000.00 a year in MLM", there you were talking about a casette you made about the differences between vitamins sold at the farmacy and the ones on the MLM companies. Do you still sell it????, I was looking in the success store and didnt see it.

    Thanks for your help,
    Looking forward to hearing from you
    Have a nice evening

  14. The above questions are strategic questions that's draw your mind to yourself to ask yourself whether your doing right thing in your life.
    These your strategic questions is helping me to ask my self whether I am doing right thing because I and one of my friend who is a business minded guy who wish to have something that pay's much in returns and we are trying to setup a firm.

  15. hi
    dear randy
    im startet a network in iran.i have a small piramid.what can i have a big piramid like u?
    please help mee.
    thank you
    saman

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  • 17 comments on “Being Real with Yourself”

    1. Randy

      Thank You for Words filled with love, challenge and passion

      God bless you, adn thank you for letting me "remember" that the next step is ACTION.

      With love and admiration

      Santiago ZG )
      COLOMBIA

    2. Mr. Gage,

      thank you so much for this great post! It made me think over my situation once again...

      I'm broke, single (and I never ever dared to be the FIRST to tell a girl that I like her because I thought it'd insult her), and, though I'm enjoying a good health in general, I'm short-sighted. But, unlike most short-sighted people, I NEVER used spectacles or contact lenses because I always realized that the very moment I'd start using them would be the beginning of the end, that is my surrender unto the "circumstances" or "fate" or shit like that. I gradually realized that I myself created my short-sightedness with my fears and failure to accept people and things the way they are (well, there are some other reasons, but I'll skip them to be brief). So I've been working to improve my vision by doing special exercises, facing my fears, and learning to accept things the way they are. I can't say I've won the battle, but I'm so much closer to the victory than those from the herd who still wear their "eye crutches" (this is the way one Russian-speaking healer called spectacles) and keep asking me sarcastically if I already had a perfect vision again.

      I understand that I attracted a partner who simply used me for her own purposes by my attitude towards myself. I used to think of myself as of a shit eater who doesn't deserve to spend more than a hundred bucks a month on his own needs, no matter how much I'd earn. Well, I've been given a good therapy by my "girlfriend" who cured my feeling of worthlessness by insulting me three to four times a week. And though I'm still feeling hurt, I'm really grateful to her for helping me awaken from that nightmare.

      Two days ago, I found Mr. Gage's "101 Keys to Your Prosperity" on my bookshelf and opened it exactly where I needed. Key # 99 said, "When you let go of people who are malevolent to you, negative events will disappear from your life" (don't judge the quotation too strictly because I did a back translation from Russian). That was a token.

      This morning, I decided to let go of my ex-girlfriend because she'd been one of the most malevolent people in my life. I sent her a message on her mobile asking her not to call or write to or meet me anymore and wishing her all the best in life.

      That was a difficult decision for me, and I'm so grateful to you, Mr. Gage, for that insight that helped me overcome the feeling of guilt my ex used to evoke in me to simply manipulate me (most women are very good at that).

      So today is my great success and that's the only reason I dared post such a long message on Mr. Gage's blog.

      The battle continues! 🙂

      P. S. Mr. Gage, thank you so much for your insights on resolving low self-esteem! I firmly decided to do one hour personal development every single morning (which I've been doing for a week) and I'm thinking about seeing a psychotherapist.

      Has it ever occurred to you that "psychotherapist" is a funny word if hyphenated properly?

      PSYCHO-THE-RAPIST 🙂

      Thanks for your attention!!

    3. Randy
      Always admire your fire and in your face attitude, you always have a tendency to put things out there that others would be afraid to relate. If people had more of your ego and tenacity, this would certainly be a more interesting world. Following you over the past few years has been enlightening and we would lose a shining star if we lost your perspective. There are hard rocks like me that believe but still strive to achieve, the answer always lies with the man in the mirror. Still appreciate your thoughtful rebukes and your sharp words to shake us into reality. We must all master the battle from within ourselves before we can ever embark on and capture the power and success many of us are seeking.
      With great respect....
      Randy

    4. Extracted and inspired from Janet Swerdlow:

      The struggle we see in the outer world is a portrayal of our own inner battles. Whether we struggle to take this job or that, live here or there, keep company with him or her, the bottom line is we're still struggling. We struggle with weight, health, finances, and food choices. We struggle to stay warm on a cold day, or cool on a warm day. We struggle to get enough sleep or any sleep at all; to remember our dreams; to interpret them, to stay consciously connected to Self, Oversoul, and God-Mind. Struggle, struggle, struggle.

      Why would we choose to incarnate in a reality of struggle? What is the struggle about? Has there ever been an experiment where such diverse characteristics are present in one genetically created species? What an intriguing time to live—as a genetic creation of multiple species, can you make peace amongst the many different directions you are pulled? Can you make peace amongst your many varied genetic lines that all exist within your one physical structure?

      What an opportunity!

      When we stop the struggle, then the outer world stops the reflection. This explains "let go and let God." Stop the struggle. Now. Rise above the struggle. Refuse to participate. Stop kicking and screaming. Stop creating an outer enemy that only exists within your own mind.

      How do you rate your progress so far? Are you up to the task that you chose? Can you accomplish what you came here to do? Are you willing to release the struggle to create inner peaceful co-existence? Can you "let go and let God?"

      When our mind-pattern only supports financial gain that is what we draw to ourselves. There are always people in society with money. They are the ones manipulating others into thinking that there is no money to be had. This is how they get yours and then you think you cannot get any more. You give the power to their limiting media stories rather than to your Oversoul and God-Mind. Who has the greatest power—the manipulators or your Oversoul and God-Mind? Once you make these determinations for yourself, you will know exactly what to do and how to do it.

    5. All very good questions you pose Randy. Once again, your direct manner is refreshing, though probably alarming to some.

      As to 'my mirror', I can answer yes to some of your questions with complete honesty. When it comes to personal wealth, I cannot. My inner sense tells me that I'm not living my Purpose or Passion, and as we all know, "Do what you love and the money comes". I'm still searching for what I love and purpose.

      I'm stumped on the relationship area though, but I DO have close friends who love me and will call me on my 'stuff'. What I seek is a partner who's willing to do the same and who's emotional damage has healed, if any. Mine has :=)

      Thanks again for all your brilliant insights. They're always helpful.

    6. Hi Randy

      Thanks for the thought provoking questions. I definitely don't score well on health, relationships, prosperity or work. And I've been doing personal development for years. I accept full responsibility for all my stuff, no excuses - good and bad. I recently broke up my Groundhog Day life but I'm attracting more of both the good and the bad stuff again, so I know I still have a way to go. I have few friends that would call me on my stuff, maybe one or two, so your comment that I might be running away from something is food for thought. I've always wondered though, as good as these questions are, how best do I go about finding answers? I can admit to the fact that I might be running away from something, but how do I figure out what it is?

    7. " What are you running away from? What is it that you’re still hanging on to that you’re afraid to have someone tell you? (Addictions, narcissism, fear of intimacy, etc.)"

      I've read every book going (nearly), I'm convinced I understand about lack programming, manifesting etc. and yet every time I get some money an incredible series of 'mishaps' occur and I'm broke again! (Engine blow up on cars, business associate/friend ..cks off with my cash, etc.). This is at least the third time this has happened.

      So I thought, I must be "hanging on to something" but try as I might I was convinced of my "correct thinking". Then last night I was introducing my 17 year old son to your Dumb Sick and Broke Book - he's a very talented racing driver and we lost a sponsor for him so he's very 'frustrated'. I thought he might associate with your love of 'spiritual experinces' with fast driving because this exactly how he feels when he is racing.

      Sorry but that's the background.....
      I continued reading your book and found a paragraph that said "you don't have to give up drinking, smoking, swearng, tv, drugs, nightclubs etc."

      Bingo! I've been trying to give something up for 15 years - Im very close to succeeding now but that paragraph made me realise - it aint no big deal! - it's probably doing me no harm at all now - but deep down there is GUILT! (Probably from my parents).

      And of course the more you focus on trying to "give up" something, the harder it is. I rather think now it'll be a lot easier - "aint no big thing"

      As usual thanks...

      If you're ever in London or Dubai and want treating like you deserve, I have some influence at those Jumeirahs!
      God Bless

      Chris (UK)

    8. To be true to myself.... let's say that I have come a long way, and I still need to cruise a few miles. What I have a lot of problem with, and I hope a few of you out there might be able to help me is this. All my life I have been told to do this, to do that because this is what we are suppose to do. (There are a lot of other people that are also programmed that we need to deal with). This is what I am having problem with, the others that are still programmed, mostly my family, even my spouse. I really enjoy what I am doing, I thank the Universe every day for every thing that comes about in my life. I love the people I work with, etc...
      In 2002, we adopted a 3 1/2 years old girl, who is challenged with "Fetal Alcoholic Syndrome". Now talk about follow the leader. She will mimic everything and everyone around her. One thing that I promised myself is that I would not impose any of the programmation that I was exposed too.
      I am a very spiritual person. I have discovered this in the past 3 years, and I have flourished since that time. BUT, before knowing really what was spirituality, I thought that going to the church was how you get spiritual, which has nothing to do with spirituality. Spirituality is what is within you, not within what happens in a Church. Mind you that you can be spiritual in a Church.
      The child had started to go to Church (because of our Catholic beliefs and all the ceremonies coming to her), and I respected what she wanted. The only problem with all that is that when asked about Church and Mass, she would answer that she was doing it for her grandma (because she was going to make grandma happy). And asking her what are you getting out of all this? she would answer "I dont know". A year or so passed, and one Sunday morning, the child's bio mom called and asked if she could see her, so I asked the child if she wanted to go with her mom a little earlier this Sunday or go to the Church and of course the child chose the mom.
      Well..... that is when the shit hit the fan. We were called abomination of hell because we lead the child away from Church. The grandma made a big scene and now the child doesn' t even want to hear about going to Church. (since she was only going to Church for grandma and grandma act up, she is not interested any more).
      This is my biggest problem. The programmation. What is ok, what is not. How to express myself with people close to me and not being left aside because of their own beliefs.
      I lived my first 50 years with others pushing my buttons. I am going to live my other 50 years for me, and I don't feel selfish because I done enough for others and now I have decided that I am living a different life, that's all. I love life, I am happy, I love what I am doing, I have very good friends that share the same beliefs, I am healthy, I am spiritual, and I am getting there with the wealth, so I am on a good path, just need help with the others in my life that do not have the same beliefs as me. You see, I live in a very small community where every one has their noses in everybody else. I know I need to move on, that is what I will do in 3 years, but I need some kind of action plan for the time being.
      So, I would appreciate some comments....
      Carole

    9. Hi, this is an insteresting subjet, I can tell you that I have my husband and a friend to have those real conversations you are talking about, I just met my friend at work about a year ago, she was the one who lend me your book "Why your´re dumb, sick and broke", after that I started to open my eyes and mind, and I am trying to read must of the books you recommended. We try to have open conversations about everything, and it is working.

      To find somebody to talk to without being judge is hard, and people, a lot of them they dont want to hear the truth.

      Most of the time I ended up being hurt by their comments, like: "you havent have a lot of boyfriends, so what do you know"(I got married 8 years ago). "You are envy, that is the only reason you are telling me this". "You havent been in this situation, so why are you giving me advice".

      So I stoped trying to have real conversation with people, they dont want to hear what you have to say. Now I just listen and from time to time I will say, " I understand what you are saying" and they are happy with that, and after, they will tell me that I am a good friend.

      I started to read self development books since I was 20 years old, stopped for 15 years and restarted a year ago, but I guess it wasnt my time to have a personal grow. Now I am ready.
      I think that people have their own time to do things, this is my time.

      I am an inmigrant who live in Montreal, I went to university in Dominican Rep and when I came here I had a lot of problems trying to work as a dentist, now I know I didint make the effort . I blamed the system, I blamed the govermment, I blamed everybody else but me.

      Now I am taking control of my life, or trying to, right now I am happy with what I have, but looking forward to having prosperity. I have a husband who open his own companie 3 years ago, have two kids that are wonderful, and I have a lot of goals to achive, It is hard but I always try to keep in mind what Jim Rohn said " My suggestion would be to walk away from the 90% who don´t and join the 10% who do."

      Thanks again Randy, have a nice weekend.

    10. I've been thinking about this for a few days- "What am I attracting", and how it relates to my ideal life.

      It sounds like there's some perfect life out there if you just attract the right things, but that would be naive.

      For people who are reading your blog, you'll NEVER get someone who is totally happy with the money they're attracting- the people who follow you always want more- like I've heard you say too.
      As far as relationships, they can ALWAYS get better. Same with everything else, right?

      I'm reminded of that prayer: "I love what I have, I just want more".
      It seems like that would be the ideal situation- loving what you have, but continuing to want more.

      We may judge that nice guy's life, but if he likes it- who are we to judge? We all get our feelings of worth from somewhere, and whereas it's great to get it all from yourself, I don't think anyone is that enlightened.

      So, all of that is to say that I am definitely attracting some of the things I want, but I am probably too focused on the things I don;t want- let's face it- because THAT's what I'm trying to change!

    11. Randy,

      Wonderful post (as always)!

      One quick off-topic (then again, maybe not 🙂 ) question:

      I am reading "The Science of Mind" and remember you mentioning the CDs that you play when you're asleep.

      I need to get these, and have done a few searches on the Blog and the emails and am obviously not entering a successful search querie.

      Would you please post a link where I can purchase these CDs (and a recommendation of which CDs are congruent with your philosophy).

      Thanks again!

      -David

    12. Thanks for your latest blog Randy, you always get everyone thinking outside of the herd mentality. Myself included!

      Ok so, you got me really thinking about all aspects of my life. I do have one friend who calls me on my stuff and I can do likewise with her. It's really sad to realize that all family conversations run the gamut of the weather and other trivial matters instead the important stuff. My sister and I are a little better at this but there is still alot of progress to be made.

      I think my spirituality is growing but coming from the strict background that I came from (raised as one of Jehovah's Witnesses) I find I am having a hard time letting go of certain doctrines. In particular, God's people are not supposed to be wealthy. We come again to those scriptures in the bible that state" it's easier for a camel to get through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the Kingdom of God."

      You mentioned to me before that the bible is an amazing book on prosperity. Would you care to expound on that? I'm sorry but I have just never viewed the bible in that way. What am I missing?

      As far as my health , I am working on it. I excersise every morning before getting ready for work. I am also eating better. I just keep reminding myself that it is ok to do something good for myself without regard for others.

      No one is going to do any of this personal development for me but me. My progress has been slow but in some aspects steady. Relationships and money seem to continue to be the stalemates for me. I am working on them though.

      When you were really working on your stuff back when, what did you do to get past areas where you get stuck? I would really like to read you insights from your experience on this as well as your thoughts on the prosperity angle of the Bible.

      Thanks for all you do. I hope you are having fun in Thailand.
      Talk to you soon,

      Lucinda

    13. Hi Randy, changing the subjet, I wanted to ask you something, I am listening to the audio "How to earn at least 100,000.00 a year in MLM", there you were talking about a casette you made about the differences between vitamins sold at the farmacy and the ones on the MLM companies. Do you still sell it????, I was looking in the success store and didnt see it.

      Thanks for your help,
      Looking forward to hearing from you
      Have a nice evening

    14. The above questions are strategic questions that's draw your mind to yourself to ask yourself whether your doing right thing in your life.
      These your strategic questions is helping me to ask my self whether I am doing right thing because I and one of my friend who is a business minded guy who wish to have something that pay's much in returns and we are trying to setup a firm.

    15. hi
      dear randy
      im startet a network in iran.i have a small piramid.what can i have a big piramid like u?
      please help mee.
      thank you
      saman

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