I cannot think of a single person I know who is not self-deluded to some degree. Their delusions protect them from harsh realities they refused to accept. Religious leaders, politicians, and advertisers/marketers know this and feed off of people's delusions. We downplay or dismiss anything that tries to destroy our delusions. If we hear a news story that goes against our beliefs, we call it fake news. We join groups, organizations, and clubs that further promote our dogma, and squelch alternative thinking and opinions. The indoctrination is usually so subtle by these organizations that we often don't know it's even occurring. We want to believe we are rational, critical thinkers, but most people are not. Most thoughts and perceptions are driven by our subconscious and our perception of reality. Jack Nicholson said it best in the movie A Few Good Men - "You can't handle the truth!", which is a very true statement for most people. The point I'm trying to make here is it is very difficult to pick out a handful of people who are objective and need to think slightly different than we do since we have a propensity to pick out like-minded friends and associates. Plus, people have a very hard time receiving criticism, especially brutally honest criticism, regardless how true it is. And if your friends have been brutally honest with you, and you refused to make changes, they will practice another human trait with you - avoidance.
I cannot think of a single person I know who is not self-deluded to some degree. Their delusions protect them from harsh realities they refused to accept. Religious leaders, politicians, and advertisers/marketers know this and feed off of people's delusions. We downplay or dismiss anything that tries to destroy our delusions. If we hear a news story that goes against our beliefs, we call it fake news. We join groups, organizations, and clubs that further promote our dogma, and squelch alternative thinking and opinions. The indoctrination is usually so subtle by these organizations that we often don't know it's even occurring. We want to believe we are rational, critical thinkers, but most people are not. Most thoughts and perceptions are driven by our subconscious and our perception of reality. Jack Nicholson said it best in the movie A Few Good Men - "You can't handle the truth!", which is a very true statement for most people. The point I'm trying to make here is it is very difficult to pick out a handful of people who are objective and need to think slightly different than we do since we have a propensity to pick out like-minded friends and associates. Plus, people have a very hard time receiving criticism, especially brutally honest criticism, regardless how true it is. And if your friends have been brutally honest with you, and you refused to make changes, they will practice another human trait with you - avoidance.
All true.
Warrior of the truth
Hey Randy,
so in another post, will you address some ideas on how to "change that quickly" (if you don't have people in your life strong/confident enough to call you out)? I'll be honest, I don't have those people in my life. Don't get me wrong, I'm not short on having people in my life who love me, care about me and truly do want the best for me. I think part of my challenge is that I'm a pretty strong personality. I'm supposedly "too clever." I can speak well when I choose to. I've been into personal development since forever and can talk a good game.
But I also know that i've got challenges that need to be addressed - if I want to live the life of my dreams. I've got poor habits around substance abuse. But my problem is they aren't severe enough to get me to a "rock bottom" then couple that with the fact that I'm the type of cat who can "show up" well below my ability, I can "phone it in" so to speak and still produce results that allow me to at least fit in with my society. Meaning I'm not even close to touching my dreams and/or potential but I'm not living off the government or anything either. I have my own home and all that jazz. Sometimes I secretly wish I'd find a rock bottom so I would be sort of forced to just come out and make a significant change. But that's not happening. Instead I'm here, damn near 40, and have been living one of those quite lives of desperation...
How do we get those strong people around to call us out? Is that what we really need or is it just to "man up" and handle our shit? Manning up hasn't worked for yet LOL.
You don't have the right people around you yet. You have to put yourself in bigger ponds where you are the smaller fish. And yes, this is an interesting topic for a future post! -RG
A true friend is not who agrees with you all the time ... a true friend shows you what you are doing wrong and advises you; unfortunately,... I have not found a true friend in my life